Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

Ha ha making rounds of tea. That never works.

what the fuck are you talking about

i think they're making tea by the cauldron.

You've been here for two years. We work for a regional publishing company. QUIT ASKING THE ENTIRE OFFICE WHERE "GREENBRIAR" IS AND BOOKMARK GOOGLE MAPS.

thats just rong

Don't ask me to explore alternatives and write a new role proposal that could possibly change my job, and then pretend that it doesn't mean anything. You have only made me realise that my job isn't effective and totally broken. Your a senior level, smug faced, time wasting twunt.

Garghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

"Hey guess what Trayce, I'm leaving on friday!"
"aw no, why? Oh btw who's driving yr major project now?"
"you are"

U&&^%^&

(in fairness a) I already was and b) he said I was doing a brill job and c) he isnt a boss)

Working on a project of a six-impossible-things-before-breakfast nature. It has been utter madness from day 1, and though good people are working 70 hour weeks on it, there's a certain amount of chaos. Everyone has been heroically good-humoured about it.

A week ago my boss brought in a new temporary project manager with the sole task of applying some control to all this.

New PM to me, about 4x a day: "What's the bloody point of all this? This project is a load of shit, there's been no governance, I'm used to working somewhere where there's some FUCKING ORGANISATION, you are wasting my time &c &c."

Do I rat him out? He's raised my blood pressure to the point where I want to go off sick just to get away from him.

Politely tell him that getting angry is understandable but not constructive, and that you believe it is his job is to introduce a set of controls which will ensure the project delivers to cost,quality and time.

That's where I started. /sigh

Yeah like um, isnt it his job to introduce said governance and organisation? Geesh.

tbh PM sounds like me most of the time. I don't know how the hell people put up with this shit otherwise. I'm not a PM though.

slap his cuntish face

People put up with loads of stuff perfectly well until some idiot starts ranting about how shit it all is. "you are wasting my time" is the worst. yes. we're all wasting our time. we'd all much rather be doing something fun or creative but unfortunately this is work, and we need to feed our children so stfu.

idgi then. Or is the point of this thread that you rant about how shit it all is to people outside of the office? Doesn't seem very constructive. I guess I figure it's better I complain about stuff on the off chance someone will actually do something about it.

lol I mean I have in fact used the words "stop wasting my time" this morning. But they were!

Poo, if people are being stupid, lazy, wilfully disorganised, and you have asked them 100x to get organised a little more and they've ignored yr sage advice, I'm calling that 'situation A'.

If, OTOH, people have been working themselves into fits of exhausted nausea to mobilise in 6 weeks >1000 new recruits in 6 new offices, doing high profile work every step of which has to be picked over and signed off by legal people,, and YOU WERE HIRED SPECIFICALLY TO HELP US BE ORGANISED, I'll call that 'situation B'.

B /= A.

And yes I think people sometimes vent here to save themselves being inappropriately rude in the workplace.

"You're wasting my time", such a horrible status-protecting thing to say. there with "I'm a very busy man" or "sent from my Blackberry"

(sorry CP, nowt personal of course :D

Yeah Zora's right, if someone was explicitly hired to fix the "load of shit" but then does nothing but bitch about it being shit and do nothing to fix it AS THEY WERE HIRED TO DO I'd be piss mad.

This guy is indeed superheating my urine.

part of my new duties this week involves loading €5k in coins into my car and driving them to the bank, uninsured and without supervision/help.

Nobody sees a problem with this, i dunno. I feel like a walkon part in 'heat', ie victim #5 or w/e

ps five large in coins is fucking heavy

btw where do you work and what is your most likely route

also do you happen to have a superfast forklift

(buys Nixon mask)

the route is the only one to the bank from the civic offices and my car reg is 02 W heeeeey waitaminute

i love it when my office is too cheap to hire someone that knows what they're doing.
this woman that is now assigned to "helping" me is sucking up more of my time by having no clue how to go about her job. and it's not like i'm being impatient with our procedures and other things anybody would need time to figure out - this is shit (like how to use a mac/sever/indesign/illustrator) that i shouldn't have to be explaining consistently throughout the day.

i also love it when i pass a project off to another coworker - who is supposed to have some sort of functioning brain for reading/analyzing/making conclusions - and she comes over and begins asking me 1,000 questions about said project WITHOUT EVEN LOOKING AT IT. LOOK AT IT AND YOU WILL SEE WHY YOUR QUESTIONS ARE DUMB BEYOND REASON.

this was the convo:
dunce: "what's the bla bla bla... is this yadda yadda... does it have etc etc"
me: "you didn't look at it did you"
dunce: blank stare... "i guess i should?"
me: points to her towards her desk

In staff meeting, co-worker says, "Hey, maybe we should set up a session for James to teach everybody Photoshop!"

I hate being volunteered for stuff!

also love it when i pass a project off to another coworker - who is supposed to have some sort of functioning brain for reading/analyzing/making conclusions - and she comes over and begins asking me 1,000 questions about said project WITHOUT EVEN LOOKING AT IT.

Not to get picky all over your IA because every IA is aggravating in its own way, but if I'm inheriting a project from someone, I'd sure like them to take the time to walk me through their work and thought processes to date.

'what username should i use?'
'dangermouse, password penfold.'
'what is the username?'
'dangermouse.'
'what is the password?'
'penfold. p e n f o l d.'
'p e n?'
'f o l d.'

people who don't listen are the most disgusting savages imo

one pet peeve is people who are all smug about how well they "multitask" or how they don't need to take notes during meetings, except when push comes to shove, it's unitasking/note-taking me that gets shit right cuz i was paying attention all along.

multi-tasking often means "attention deficit disorder"

Myopia in the workplace

Not to get picky all over your IA because every IA is aggravating in its own way, but if I'm inheriting a project from someone, I'd sure like them to take the time to walk me through their work and thought processes to date.

these were questions she was asking assuming it was another job, and even if it was the job she was looking at, half her questions would have been answered by... LOOKING. AT. IT. just for a few mere seconds. i don't know what an IA is, btw but i think you're assuming i have some kind of job i do not.

and she wasn't taking the project over for that matter either. it's basically her job to take the file i built, make sure the copy is right and get the creatives and account team to sign off on it, then give it back.

Oh sorry, I forgot this was the co-workers thread, an IA is an "irrational annoyance". The other thing is that I work with someone who's super hardcore about being asked questions and half the time I think he's hating me somewhere right behind his eyes.

ha ha - this is no IA. it was basically an ad she decided to literally not look at and instead come over and ask a bazillion irrelevant questions about.

which were all answered (or rendered null) immediately upon returning to her desk and glancing at what i had given her.

I'll come to Canada and slap her for you.

We rolled out a new tool today, and upon arrival, I see the introductory email, explaining I should have gotten a new ID/password yesterday.

Of course, I didn't, and on reading the FAQ they published weeks ago, it tells us we use our existing I'd and password. I try it, it doesn't work, so I call our help desk.

The help desk line appears to have malfunctioned, as after five separate tries, it goes to dead air after the intro message, instead of bringing up menu options, and hitting the keypad does nothing.

I have to then manually start a ticket via email to get this fixed. And...we are required to run something in this new tool today.

I emailed the person who sent the email today to ask about the contradictory info in the two documents, and she says she can't get into the tool, then contradicts the email she sent today and says we should use existing IDs/passwords.

Look, I'm forgiving about hiccups when something new is rolled out, but there's a diff between that and flat out disorganization...and as a result, the Support Center is now overloaded.

Ugh.

I had problems earlier in the week with my most direct colleague, who through a series of meetings and memos, demonstrated that he was completely unable to string together a coherent sentence that could represent any idea that he might have been trying to express. Yesterday, 10 minutes before I had to leave, another coworker approached me with a question and she was similarly unable to speak English in any meaningful way. So I just turned her loose on him. Expecting fallout this morning.

I hope it goes like this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IQbYc7qLgBc&feature=player_detailpage

Yes! A combination of that and this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9RCaRv-_jQ

Ok, my guy who couldn't keep his shit together earlier in the week totally redeemed himself on this one. Feel like a bit of an asshole for anonymously bitching about him on the internet.

the only thing to do is confess!

give him ur g+ invite

My coworker who never puts anything into other people's leaving collections, not even when someone he was super chatty and matey with left after being kind of screwed over by mgmt, is leaving, and the large amount of money in his leaving collection is upsetting my need for a simplistic karma-based universe

(ps he is not super poor or anything, or if he is maybe he wouldn't be if he didn't get a new smartphone every 3 seconds and go abroad multiple times a year)

anyway I hope his new job does not think he is quite so goddamn awesome and his new boss might notice that he starts his 9-5:30 job at 9:47 every day and still goes before 5

yes this is the guy I revived the "bitterness" thread over, though no, he wasn't the first and he won't be the last to make me so irrationally goddamn fz"£*$"£ oh god i hate my brain, can anyone help me fix it? please.