Dogs - classic or dud?

Pretty much dud.

They smell bad, they eat their own excrement, they are thick and, most irritating of all, they are sickeningly, vapidly faithful.

"My pet guinea pig got worried with a dog in the house."

Haha my mom-in-law got rid of her guinea pig because she thought it was making her dog nervous. (He is a weird old dog with dementia BUT she also projects like crazy.)

Also, if you're buying furniture, get it to match the dog, duh! (If your dog was made by Eames be prepared for a bit of an expense.)

Heavens to Murgatroyd! Shall we next be seeing a "Human Beings: Classic or Dud?" thread? Dogs are intelligent and emotionally complex creatures - so they are both unclassifiable and unfuckwithable.

I have a mild distrust for people who dislike dogs. (Unless they are terrified of dogs because a dog attacked them, that one makes sense.)

some real sad sacks on this thread

I should have searched first: Human Beings: Classic or Dud?

I walked my little guy to the convenience store the other day and brought him in. The clerk (who is a nice, chill guy) came out and started feeding my dog Jack Links jerky sticks. After the fifth jerky stick, I was like, "He's gonna get spoiled!" (meaning 'plz quit feeding my dog 600-calorie treats'), but I am glad my little guy brightened his morning.

How do you know when it's time to get a new dog after your old dog passes on? I don't want the poor new dog to be the object of subconscious derision for not being Mr. Snitter, but on the other hand, the house feels so empty and wrong without a dog around that it's just breaking my heart every day.

Abbott, I'm sorry you lost Mr. Snitter, but if you're asking and you're a dog person, the time's drawing near (also you'd probably be going to a shelter, right, so some little guy gets friends and a home before Xmas). In my family, it sometimes seemed like our poodles were auditioning to be the drummer in Spinal Tap: apart from the one that bit me when I was three and had to go 'live on a farm', we had two killed by cars and one killed by another dog - all male dogs. The only one to die of old age was female and her last six months were shared with the puppy my cousin sprung on my mom - Willie will be 10 in March. My mother has had a black poodle on call since she was 16 and every time we came back to an empty, dog-less house it probably only took two weeks TOPS for her to get motivated and send for reinforcements. So, basically, as soon as she had the cash we had a new dog. The thing with dogs is that we don't really resent a new one as replacement, because IT'S A PUPPY and they imprint from the second they interact at the breeder/shelter. The only other thing I can pass on is that puppies who don't get mad when you squeeze their paws grow up to be the best-tempered adults.

I didn't think it was right, but I got a new dog right away after my dog died. I thought it might be disrespectful, but dogs bring a warmth and sense of safety to a home and once we brought our new dog home we didn't feel like we were "replacing" the old dog. The new dog seemed to know that an old dog had been in the home before him. I would recommend getting a dog that is completely different from the older one, unless you fancy a particular breed.

We ended up getting another dog pretty soon after, too, about one week. I still miss my old dog a lot but the new dog, Mandy, is really sweet and affectionate. She makes things a lot easier. She has a pretty different personality than my old dog, who kind of had dog aspergers. She came with a kennel cough, though, so she hacks and has a gross runny nose even after two weeks of antibiotics, poor thing.

Yay hero dogs:

http://www.ktla.com/media/photo/2010-05/53623954.jpg

What a boss little face he's making.

They are fascinating, but I ultimately find them annoying. Their barking sounds ugly, especially when it comes from the small ones. I don't like their unpredictable aggressiveness (especially with other dogs), or excessive jumpiness. I wouldn't want to put up with their potential destructiveness (after hearing, for example, "my dog ate my laptop" type stories), although cats are probably worse on that account. Would not want to live with one, and prefer not to live near them if they bark much at all (again--mostly the little ones with the piercing cries).

Once I saw a friend's mother pick up a dog and use it to wipe away her tears, hardest moment of my life trying not to laugh in her face

What is a good dog toy for a dog whose favorite thing to chew on is paper towels, toilet paper, tissue paper, Q-Tips, etc – paper products?

Classig generally but dud when they go out and roll in shit (like our filthy creature did this morning)

*classic

omg I need to know the paper question too. Benson thinks paper is the most amazing thing ever.

I thought chewy rope toys would be good, but she chews them up so fast, and makes such a mess with them, that it feels kind of pointless to buy them. (This might be a weird attitude – I feel this same way about cantaloupes. "Why pay $3 for this thing when I'm just going to eat it all right away?")

I usually just let my dogs have cereal boxes or other bits of cardboard that I'm finished with, but you still have to clean them up.

Have you tried withholding some portion of your dog's faily food allowance and using it to stuff a Kong? If you mash up a banana, add it to the kibble, then freeze it and give it to her, it'll give her something to do. Being hungry stops her from giving up when it's difficult.

I have a huge strong dog and used to have a (dear and smart) cat. The cat was eighty thousand times meaner and more destructive to property and used to scratch visitors to boot. My dog's biggest crime is giving hugs to strangers and guests.

I am a huge dog lover, but to me that means admitting that some dogs frankly suck and I feel guilty that I think this. My dog thinks this too. Some dogs are just dumb.

Dog that lives next door to me needs to chill the fuck out and shut the fuck up.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v296/WilliamCrump63/whippetgood.jpg

Shouldn't this dog have a scarier face?

I was at the greyhounds last night, and would definitely have bet on that fucker if it had showed up. That's not actually real, is it?

That's a "bully whippet" – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myostatin

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EQhYIXDWsAAmE6Q?format=jpg&name=4096x4096

Douglas has developed this habit of finding either the longest stick or the heaviest log and stubbornly trying to bring it back to the house. He's such a competitive type if I try take it off him he will fite me to the death for it!

fs the size of that thing. pmsl what a good boy

he gets huge long sticks as well and becomes a marauding pikedog on narrow paths, trying to knock old folks over who've just recently had hip replacements!

I demand a clear photo of Douglas carrying an enormous stick, captioned "branch manager" as is traditional with photos of this kind.

lol that's his current job title alright!

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EQkGTbWX0AAjXmN?format=jpg&name=4096x4096

I lost my archive of pics of Douglas with huge fuckoff sticks when my last phone got drowned unfortunately because I had pretty funny ones, but this is from half an hour ago!

Douglas is best <3

damn I did it from my phone and just realised it doesn't really capture how amazingly handsome he is!

xxp aaaaah I’m dying he’s perfect

as a scotsman I approve of dogs called doug

I can hardly ever get a good photo of him, it's almost like he's got some preternatural ability to move or it always is blurred cos I'm rushing to take it before he does move!

dud

douglas i love u

this is the first result for "dud dog" on google, poor fella

https://medium.com/@amelapay/my-first-dog-was-a-dud-thoughts-on-chip-in-advance-of-his-death-d7832e015913

Douglas is classic.

My dog, who I had to shove up my jumper yesterday to get him to stop crying because he was cold because he won't wear the jumper I knitted for him, is a dud.

sounds classic to me

He is the Tom Haverford of dogs.