'The Day Today' -- "HELLO, YOU!"

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1994 - No-one died

― Mikey G (Mikey G), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 09:11 (nineteen years ago) link

"Hello sir!"

― Dadaismus (Dada), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 09:20 (nineteen years ago) link

"Why don't I use real people instead of dead ones? I dunno, y'see I.. It's power - I want power!"

and the three voices of "Justice". This is the best bit on the whole DVD.

― dog latin (dog latin), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 09:44 (nineteen years ago) link

John Fashanu. John Fashanu. JOHN Fashanu. JOHN FASHANU. John Fashanu.

That's John Fusharnoo, tonight at nine.

― Fergal (Ferg), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 10:56 (nineteen years ago) link

The killer line of all killer lines:

"Proof, if proof be need be...

― Dadaismus (Dada), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 10:57 (nineteen years ago) link

I've said it before and I'll say it again: America needs Chris Morris more than the UK does. Even if we do have Jon Stewart.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 10:58 (nineteen years ago) link

I occasionally still use the proof line. And I end most conversations with "And that's all the news".

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:00 (nineteen years ago) link

"...god i wish it weren't"

― jed_ (jed), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:02 (nineteen years ago) link

THE FINANCE ARSE

― Mikey G (Mikey G), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:04 (nineteen years ago) link

Yeah, I think the proof line has penetrated a certain demographic's everyday chatter to an alarming (but always gently amusing) way. With Pam it's "in summary...breezes." She has a love/hate thing with the vagueness of UK weather forecasts and this just seems to encapsulate it all.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:05 (nineteen years ago) link

i often annoyingly end phone conversations with "...and on that bombshell"

― jed_ (jed), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:06 (nineteen years ago) link

The weatherman graphics are impressive in the way that you find yourself thinking "that's actually not a bad way of displaying it". Also it can't have been cheap.

I still think of 'Brent - Physical Cartoonist" everytime I see something by Mark Fiore, Flash Satirist.

The Bomb Dogs section is maybe my favourite, particularly the interview with the IRA spokesman (BASTARDS?) on helium.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:10 (nineteen years ago) link

"Their leader is a grease monkey from Acton"

― Dadaismus (Dada), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:15 (nineteen years ago) link

"So what's the German for 30 percent?"

"Trenter percenter."

― Jonnie, Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:20 (nineteen years ago) link

"And we've just heard that the defence secretary Micheal Portillo carries a saw off shotgun to constituency meetings, corners children in parks and chews their cheeks and has frequent sexual intercourse with stray animals claiming "As long as it has a backbone, I'll do it!".

― jed_ (jed), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:22 (nineteen years ago) link

"The Day Today - bagpiping news into fact"

― Dadaismus (Dada), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:23 (nineteen years ago) link

"Thanks, Colin. He's not gay, by the way - we wouldn't employ a homosexual. "

― jed_ (jed), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:24 (nineteen years ago) link

nono, "We'd like to apologise for our report on Friday that defense secretary..."

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:24 (nineteen years ago) link

even better!

We'd like to apologise for our report on Friday that defense secretary Micheal Portillo carries a saw off shotgun to constituency meetings, corners children in parks and chews their cheeks and has frequent sexual intercourse with stray animals claiming "As long as it has a backbone, I'll do it!".

― jed_ (jed), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:26 (nineteen years ago) link

The apology comes at the end, Andrew/Jed, after the barrage of slander is still percolating in yr brane.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:28 (nineteen years ago) link

Bah, you're right of course. "On Friday, we reported that..."

"Heseltine greet the children that he will later release into the wild and hunt"

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:41 (nineteen years ago) link

I like the way the intro music is just that little bit too long.

and

"You can wear them in the high street, body contours, very discreet"

― Mikey G (Mikey G), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:45 (nineteen years ago) link

Fur-Q - the original Eamon!

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:50 (nineteen years ago) link

But Fur-Q's black is he not?

― Dadaismus (Dada), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:51 (nineteen years ago) link

fUR-q DID ANTICIPATE THE pHIL cOLLIINS TRIBUTE lp N-EST-CE PAS?

'UZI LOVER'

― Enrique (Enrique), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:53 (nineteen years ago) link

Are you saying a brother can't be Eamon?

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:53 (nineteen years ago) link

Only with the application of make-up sticks

― Dadaismus (Dada), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:54 (nineteen years ago) link

"J in red and blue."

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:57 (nineteen years ago) link

in red on blue - and that's the letter of the law is it?

― jed_ (jed), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 11:59 (nineteen years ago) link

http://uk.imdb.com/top_250_films

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:01 (nineteen years ago) link

bah, ignore that.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:02 (nineteen years ago) link

"This is a high class Bureau de Change, not some Punch and Judy Show on Margate Pier"

― Dadaismus (Dada), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:05 (nineteen years ago) link

"He must have a rocket engine in that foot!"

The car discussion!

― Crickets Dance On Tequila Booty (Barima), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:07 (nineteen years ago) link

"They look like cattle... in a mad way... but cattle on bikes"

― Dadaismus (Dada), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:10 (nineteen years ago) link

Stop getting TDT wrong! "He must have a foot like a traction engine."

Kids today, sassenfrassen...

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:13 (nineteen years ago) link

"Strathcarnage versus Taste of Dunfermline CANNOT BE STOPPED"

― Dadaismus (Dada), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:14 (nineteen years ago) link

Bitch wanna try it, I said keep her quiet, shove it up her muthafucking ass and fry it

The black neighbours sketch is hilarious

― Mikey G (Mikey G), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:16 (nineteen years ago) link

"Crazed wolves in store a bad mistake admit Mothercare"

― de, Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:16 (nineteen years ago) link

What would you do if I introduced a pig into this office?

(Pre-dated Gervais by years)

― Anna (Anna), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:17 (nineteen years ago) link

Slamming the wasps from the pure apple of truth.

― Pete (Pete), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:21 (nineteen years ago) link

Actually, I might switch my 'vote' to Attitudes Night. Last televised hanging - "The initial euphoria has passed .. not an experience I'll be trying again." - "He's saying he wants you to give him a thick ear!" - kiddy pool - "Ta-ra yeh shitter!"

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:22 (nineteen years ago) link

must....buy...dvd...already...

― stevem (blueski), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:24 (nineteen years ago) link

teenage boy roasts himself in homage to chris kelly...

― jed_ (jed), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:26 (nineteen years ago) link

I'm surprised at how easily 'll quote scriptur and verse, when an equivalent run on Monty Python/Father Ted/The Simpsons would have me curling my toes from about five posts in. I think it's because this is a thread explicitly about quotes, and also for some reason it hasn't become a cultural reference point on the scale of the other three.

Also I'm assuming this thread will be politely deleted after we're done.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:27 (nineteen years ago) link

what about jam!??!!?

and i think collaterlie sisters is so hot!

― cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:27 (nineteen years ago) link

what am i, fuckin noddy?!

― Enrique (Enrique), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:28 (nineteen years ago) link

Soemthing that I suspect may have been mentioned before: It's not a very "Alan Partridge" Alan Partridge, is it? He's not pathetic as much as just a fool. Was the "Knowing Me Knowing You" AP also like this?

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:30 (nineteen years ago) link

exactly. i think jam is more twisted and subversive then the day today or brass eye.

but i love being able to watch steve coogan AND chris morris at the same time.

― cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:30 (nineteen years ago) link

xpost to enrique

― cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:31 (nineteen years ago) link

It may be more twisted and subversive but it isn't anywhere near as funny

― Dadaismus (Dada), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 12:32 (nineteen years ago) link

Skipping 42 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

NEWSFELTCH!

― zappi (joni), Sunday, 14 August 2005 10:05 (eighteen years ago) link

Ned, did you ever hear any of the Blue Jam radio show Morris did?

― Billy Dods (Billy Dods), Sunday, 14 August 2005 19:38 (eighteen years ago) link

Heard quite a bit about it, but not heard it.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 14 August 2005 19:38 (eighteen years ago) link

blue jam was amazing, worked a lot better on radio than on tv. they tried to replace the dislocation you feel that is sort of inherent to radio, with sort of woozey camerawork and blur on the tv, but it didnt really work. they used to have a big realaudio archive of it at tvcream but it all seems to have gone. migth be ok slsk though.

― ambrose (ambrose), Sunday, 14 August 2005 19:53 (eighteen years ago) link

http://chilled.cream.org/forums/bluejam.php has most of the radio shows and a wealth of other goodies besides. You'll need some torrent software but when you download it, it's a whole new world of fun.

― Billy Dods (Billy Dods), Sunday, 14 August 2005 20:50 (eighteen years ago) link

Believe I've been there before, I scarfed all the On the Hour episodes from there. And very happy I was to have done that.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 14 August 2005 20:54 (eighteen years ago) link

three years pass...

warp to release four-disc on the hour box in two weeks

― cam'ron wite (haitch), Monday, 10 November 2008 04:13 (fifteen years ago) link

they've been on radio7 several times in the past couple of years but they always miss a couple of episodes out of each run (and i don't think they've ever repeated the christmas special) so this will be useful.

― koogs, Monday, 10 November 2008 10:51 (fifteen years ago) link

seventeen-disc blue jam box probably a pipe dream

― restraint and blindness (Just got offed), Monday, 10 November 2008 12:23 (fifteen years ago) link

two weeks pass...

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51NCa3CTxmL._SS500_.jpg

― koogs, Friday, 28 November 2008 10:13 (fifteen years ago) link

two years pass...

Finally discovered this - the brilliance/episode is truly staggering. Immediately ordered Brass Eye as well.

― StanM, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 21:38 (thirteen years ago) link

Wise man.

― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 21:51 (thirteen years ago) link

two years pass...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SPWgodul_E

i have never heard/seen this before - anyone know when this was done/where it was broadcast?

― There shouldn't be a thread for Dennis Perrin tweets. (stevie), Sunday, 21 July 2013 12:44 (ten years ago) link

It was a DVD easter egg. I guess they recorded it specifically for the DVD release. 26 April 2004 is the release date according to amazon.

― cajunsunday, Sunday, 21 July 2013 13:12 (ten years ago) link

thanks!

― There shouldn't be a thread for Dennis Perrin tweets. (stevie), Sunday, 21 July 2013 23:08 (ten years ago) link

"Peter, you've added nothing."

I seem to remember something Chris Morris wrote that was published in the UK quite soon after 9/11 - in The Independent or The Observer, possibly a pull-out section that was quite shocking in a kind of "too soon man" way. I'd love to see that again.

― kraudive, Monday, 22 July 2013 00:00 (ten years ago) link

amazingly all of it is here, as PDFs, in the Observer archive
http://observer.guardian.co.uk/review/page/0,,671683,00.html

― piscesx, Monday, 22 July 2013 00:18 (ten years ago) link

ooh the Geefe columns are there too! Nice work piscesx!

― Neil S, Monday, 22 July 2013 14:34 (ten years ago) link

five years pass...

RIO'S ON THE MONKEY DUST

― puppy bash (darraghmac), Wednesday, 5 December 2018 22:24 (five years ago) link

two months pass...

You're old, we're old.

The Day Today, 25th anniversary dinner. We’ve lost the news.@RebeccaFront @Aiannucci @Pmarber @PeterBaynham pic.twitter.com/9esJ9uPDzL
— David Schneider (@davidschneider) February 12, 2019

― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 13 February 2019 17:42 (five years ago) link

Is that peter baynham in the middle?! Christ the Hollywood life’s taken a toll if so, he looks like ET brundlefly’d with present-day devito

― gray say nah to me (wins), Wednesday, 13 February 2019 17:45 (five years ago) link

it's him, camera phones are never flattering tbf

― kinder, Wednesday, 13 February 2019 17:46 (five years ago) link

That’s true, and it’s an endearingly dorky photo in general

― gray say nah to me (wins), Wednesday, 13 February 2019 17:50 (five years ago) link

― imago, Wednesday, 13 February 2019 17:56 (five years ago) link

Something poetic about Chris Morris slowly morphing into Victor Lewis Smith

― whoa is me (stevie), Wednesday, 13 February 2019 19:48 (five years ago) link

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