Help me learn Mandarin Chinese

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Anyway, so ages ago, some Warring States period Einstein decides that what the world needs is another 22-stroke character, and so he goes and smacks 粥 into 鬲 and produces 鬻. He writes it down and goes to show it off to all his literatus friends, all, “Yo Scholar Danqiu, you know how you and Master Cen thought that you were pretty cool with that seven-stroke expansion of 畺 the other week? Well, check this out, bi-atch!” And then Scholar Danqiu was like, “Yo, only losers still say ‘bi-atch,’ so why don’t you get your loser ass and your loser new character out of my face?” And so the scholar goes home, tail between his legs, and vows to find a use for this awesome new character that he’s created.

And he finds one! See, today, 粥 and 鬻 are pronounced pretty differently – zhōu and yù respectively — but back in the day, they sounded the same, or more or less the same. (Karlgren reconstructs the pronunciations as *tiuk and *diuk respectively.) Over time, the pronunciations and meanings diverged, and so the meaning of 鬻 evolves from “tasteless glop with the consistency of snot that nobody with functioning tastebuds could ever conceivably enjoy eating” to “to nourish” to “to sell food” to “to sell, particularly as an act of desperation in trying times” to “to sell one’s own child.”

That’s right, there is a single-syllable word in Chinese that means “to sell e.g. one’s own child during e.g. a famine,” and in a delicious little irony, it’s derived from 粥 “gruel” which makes it cognate to 育, “bear/raise children.” It occurs in words like 鬻子 “a trader in children,” 卖妻鬻子 “to sell off one’s wife and son [in a famine],” and, most interestingly to me for personal reasons, 鬻文, or “to write for pay.”

Man, I love Chinese.

dylannn, Wednesday, 4 May 2011 05:49 (twelve years ago) link

it's weird... you know, being able to speak "chinese" better than chinese people is a reasonable goal. since, like you said, mandarin is still the 2nd language of millions (hundred of millions, maybe!) of chinese people (shit, look at how many speaker wu has!!!)

dylannn, Wednesday, 4 May 2011 05:51 (twelve years ago) link

actually, you didn't say that but you know what i mean.

dylannn, Wednesday, 4 May 2011 05:51 (twelve years ago) link

i get depressed as shit by the pinyin.info gang and their eliminate characters rhetoric.

Yeah this is garbage. Pinyin is a stopgap imo. Also good luck getting like two billion people to give up their writing system.

finish with a fast piston pump (Autumn Almanac), Wednesday, 4 May 2011 05:51 (twelve years ago) link

haha that's actually a concern, a lot of chinese kids are being raised with cell phones and THE INTERNET and are forgetting how to write characters

dayo, Wednesday, 4 May 2011 05:52 (twelve years ago) link

xp they would say: look at vietnam! and then chinese kids won't be wasting time studying useless characters and will have more time for play!

xxp yeah, text has ruined me for handwriting characters. jeez. i whip out my phone all the time in a way i didn't when i had to be writing high level shit by hand (ie academic whatnot)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lion-Eating_Poet_in_the_Stone_Den

dylannn, Wednesday, 4 May 2011 05:53 (twelve years ago) link

One of the omg things about having an iphone is being able to write characters all the time if you like. I pull out the pinyin kb occasionally (e.g. if I really can't be fkd getting the hwr to recognise some moderately complex/ambiguous character) but mainly it's all strokes.

finish with a fast piston pump (Autumn Almanac), Wednesday, 4 May 2011 05:58 (twelve years ago) link

pleco has a full screen HWR software it's awesome

dayo, Wednesday, 4 May 2011 05:58 (twelve years ago) link

pleco is my life iirc

finish with a fast piston pump (Autumn Almanac), Wednesday, 4 May 2011 06:00 (twelve years ago) link

i'd recommend trying wenlin if you haven't already, as a general allpurpose piece of software for learning chinese, translating chinese, etc. it just received its first update in a decade and famously looks like you're still using windows 3.1 but it's dope.

dylannn, Wednesday, 4 May 2011 06:00 (twelve years ago) link

in fact yesterday my teacher spotted me running off some stroke order animation on the ipad and was all "WHAT is THAT" xp

finish with a fast piston pump (Autumn Almanac), Wednesday, 4 May 2011 06:01 (twelve years ago) link

mmm, I had a look at the wenlin website a couple of times, saw the price and lost interest. I'm sure it's excellent but I have so many effective tools on the go that I don't need something that extensive atm. Will probably go back to it one day though.

finish with a fast piston pump (Autumn Almanac), Wednesday, 4 May 2011 06:03 (twelve years ago) link

yeah wenlin is gonna be my next big purchase

dayo, Wednesday, 4 May 2011 06:03 (twelve years ago) link

hmm, the way the $au—$us exchange rate is atm maybe i should just do it

finish with a fast piston pump (Autumn Almanac), Wednesday, 4 May 2011 06:13 (twelve years ago) link

One day when I get my shit together I'll fill this thread with links to every book and resource that I find invaluable.

finish with a fast piston pump (Autumn Almanac), Wednesday, 4 May 2011 06:53 (twelve years ago) link

two weeks pass...

So we are now doing time and I am fucking shithouse at it.

百万个叉烧包 (Autumn Almanac), Monday, 23 May 2011 09:32 (twelve years ago) link

Geez I know China's regime is oppresive but I didn't think studying it would get you into THAT much trouble.

The man who mistook his life for a FAP (Trayce), Monday, 23 May 2011 09:46 (twelve years ago) link

HAR

Teacher keeps asking me stuff and I keep having to ask him to repeat it fifty times.

"现在几点吗?"
"I DON'T FUCKING KNOW"

百万个叉烧包 (Autumn Almanac), Monday, 23 May 2011 10:22 (twelve years ago) link

one month passes...

Just bought this fucko --> http://mandarinposter.com/

invite ← VERB (Schlafsack), Wednesday, 13 July 2011 02:14 (twelve years ago) link

wow!

Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 13 July 2011 04:54 (twelve years ago) link

Heck. I'd put that on the loo wall myself! Great way to do rote learning btw - my old housemate/bff Ange used to have a TCP layers/networking layout poster on the back of the loo door at ours when she was doing CS/multimedia. I think I learned more from it than she did, staring at it every day... cos it became 100% relevant in my job, and now shes a cook in the Navy, so erm.

Bloompsday (Trayce), Wednesday, 13 July 2011 11:07 (twelve years ago) link

It is definitely great for that, but my use will be marking off the characters I've learnt with the lol included whiteboard marker. I'm guessing I've picked up half those characters, so tracking my progress on this giant thing will help me get through the rest. btw there's a SECOND one of these coming soon, 3,000 chars in total.

invite ← VERB (Schlafsack), Wednesday, 13 July 2011 23:00 (twelve years ago) link

How the heck did the Chinese get anywhere once typewriters/computers came about?

Bloompsday (Trayce), Thursday, 14 July 2011 07:07 (twelve years ago) link

100% in the written exam. 100 fucking %. Going to treat myself.

Gary Barlow syndrome (Autumn Almanac), Monday, 18 July 2011 09:37 (twelve years ago) link

Booyah! Go you! :)

Bloompsday (Trayce), Monday, 18 July 2011 09:39 (twelve years ago) link

aww thx <3

Gary Barlow syndrome (Autumn Almanac), Monday, 18 July 2011 09:51 (twelve years ago) link

I'm trying to learn a little bit of Mandarin too, just for fun since I'm going to China for a couple of weeks in September. I'm not going to try to learn the written characters though - it'll just be spoken with a little bit of pinyin to help with memorization. Has anyone tried Chinesepod.com? I'm doing the free trial and so far the lessons seem pretty good.

o. nate, Monday, 18 July 2011 20:04 (twelve years ago) link

this blog post saved my life today

http://robrohan.com/2007/02/03/typing-proper-pinyin-on-mac/

dayo, Monday, 18 July 2011 20:14 (twelve years ago) link

Brilliant, just what I need.

o. nate, I've not spent a great deal of time with ChinesePod but it gets a huge rap from loads of learners.

Gary Barlow syndrome (Autumn Almanac), Monday, 18 July 2011 22:42 (twelve years ago) link

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2011-07-19/news-corp-share-slump-murdoch/2799888

News Corp total value down 20%/US$9b since all this started. DELICIOUS.

invite ← VERB (Schlafsack), Tuesday, 19 July 2011 01:26 (twelve years ago) link

(estimated)

invite ← VERB (Schlafsack), Tuesday, 19 July 2011 01:27 (twelve years ago) link

shit, wrong thread

invite ← VERB (Schlafsack), Tuesday, 19 July 2011 01:27 (twelve years ago) link

...or is it.

Bloompsday (Trayce), Tuesday, 19 July 2011 03:03 (twelve years ago) link

I just LAPSED into Chinese because I couldn't remember the English for something. Didn't realise until after I'd done it. First time ever.

Gary Barlow syndrome (Autumn Almanac), Wednesday, 20 July 2011 07:45 (twelve years ago) link

NEXT:

1. learn some other sinitic language, start telling everyone how 吴语 has as many native speakers as german, decry the chinese govt 汉办 confucian institutes' destruction of minority languges and commitment to simplified characters which cut us off from chinese history and the greater sinosphere
2. get really into some weird obscure shit like 1950s land reform-era socialist realism sci-fi or bawdy errenzhuan from some specific neighborhood of a specific city in liaoning
3. carry a copy of 西夏旅馆 or 荒人手记 on the bus, meet literate taiwanese girls
4. smoke a blunt of tuna kush with david der-wei wang

dylannn, Wednesday, 20 July 2011 08:54 (twelve years ago) link

I'm gonna have to start calling you Mal, Adam!

Bloompsday (Trayce), Wednesday, 20 July 2011 08:55 (twelve years ago) link

idgi

Gary Barlow syndrome (Autumn Almanac), Wednesday, 20 July 2011 10:07 (twelve years ago) link

Mal from Firefly, you kno. They lapse into Chinese swearing and such.

Bloompsday (Trayce), Wednesday, 20 July 2011 10:21 (twelve years ago) link

nooo

Gary Barlow syndrome (Autumn Almanac), Wednesday, 20 July 2011 10:41 (twelve years ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AYTM5H2IDSg

Bloompsday (Trayce), Wednesday, 20 July 2011 10:46 (twelve years ago) link

omg that's fantastic, I had no idea

Gary Barlow syndrome (Autumn Almanac), Wednesday, 20 July 2011 11:15 (twelve years ago) link

Sir, you must watch all of Firefly forthwith! Its only one season. I can lend you my dvd if you like. Its bloody awesome.

Bloompsday (Trayce), Wednesday, 20 July 2011 11:35 (twelve years ago) link

Thx for offer but I can get my hands on it pretty easily. Quite fascinated now, ha.

Gary Barlow syndrome (Autumn Almanac), Wednesday, 20 July 2011 11:39 (twelve years ago) link

Yeah its not a pivotal thing in the show but it lends a great flavour to it. And Joss Whedon's stuff is great, so.

Bloompsday (Trayce), Wednesday, 20 July 2011 11:40 (twelve years ago) link

They have a course in Chinese in our ELEMENTARY school. I mean ffs I had a hard time learning french. Granted, it's for the gifted kids.

Nathalie (stevienixed), Wednesday, 20 July 2011 15:04 (twelve years ago) link

thank you forvo.com for allowing me to enjoy dyao's username:
http://www.forvo.com/word/%E6%88%91%E7%88%B1%E4%BD%A0/#zh
(things everyone who actually posts on this thread already knew)

Adam's link reminds me that I recently spent some time googling the Chinese for smallpox on account of the image linked and partially explained herein:
http://languagelog.ldc.upenn.edu/nll/?p=1678

the ascent of nyan (a passing spacecadet), Sunday, 31 July 2011 18:50 (twelve years ago) link

now feeling creepy for accidentally using dayo's old username and calling Schlafsack his real name when neither of you know who I am, sorry both

forvo is pretty handy though in my experience of learning languages which are not Chinese

the school I went to now makes the kids learn Mandarin, was kind of envious when I read this in the alumni newsletter, but also felt a frisson of shame and panic that I would not have been smart enough to learn something so radically different as Chinese, and now other kids are

(but the thought of doing a tonal language in school with all the mean kids listening is pretty horrifying to those of us who can't even sing or manage a convincing French accent)

the ascent of nyan (a passing spacecadet), Sunday, 31 July 2011 19:08 (twelve years ago) link

and calling Schlafsack his real name when neither of you know who I am, sorry both

it's cool (i am he)

Gary Barlow syndrome (Autumn Almanac), Sunday, 31 July 2011 19:10 (twelve years ago) link

i mean 風雪情未了 if you want to be precise (traditional 风)

XxxxxxxXxxxxxxxxXxxxx (dylannn), Monday, 1 June 2020 21:22 (three years ago) link

thank you !!!!!!!!

budo jeru, Tuesday, 2 June 2020 00:08 (three years ago) link


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