Worst TV adverts of the moment

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

Not all messages are displayed: show all messages (2768 of them)

> The worst time to watch TV, advert-wise, is Channel 4 in the afternoons

five's afternoon films are, if anything, worse. they are all sponsored by Sterident and feature those annoying bookend ads with a cheetah who sounds like terry thomas making various teeth related jokes.

― koogs (koogs), Friday, 8 April 2005 07:12 (nineteen years ago) link

AAARRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!

I have just remembered which advert provokes the SCREAMING RAGE THROWING THINGS AT THE TELEVISION RAGE:

"Hello Auntie!
"Kim Catrall!" (if it's really her niece is she really going to greet her by full name?)
"Why can't I find a decent MANG!?!?!?" (is this supposed to be lampooning Kim or her character?)
"Here, practise on this tea" (GARG GARG KILL KILL!!!) "Don't do that, Kim" (Didn't she just tell her to practise on the tea?!?!?

Words cannot describe how much I hate this advert.

― Adherents of the Repeated Kate (kate), Monday, 11 April 2005 08:18 (nineteen years ago) link

Oh, come on, Kim Catrall tossing off a packet of tea is the best thing ever.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Monday, 11 April 2005 08:23 (nineteen years ago) link

I'm amazed they didn't think of that in Police Academy.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Monday, 11 April 2005 09:39 (nineteen years ago) link

interesting that lager companies and lad mag publishers go for exactly the same type. Affluent, but still ordinary blokes
Don't they go for £50 man? The Observer had an article last year or something about £50 man. He is the guy who always buys £50 worth of CDs when he goes into town. I think it's the same guy.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Monday, 11 April 2005 15:41 (nineteen years ago) link

There are some CableVision (local cable Tv supplier) ads running here in Jersey City that set my teeth on edge. Each spot is a mock music video - complete with song title and credits - featuring some embarrasing performances by what I hope are Cablevision employees. There's the emo-singer songwriter sensitive dude, the jazz chanteuse, the chanteuse surrounded by some retarded "vocalese" guys, the works. These ads are wretched.

Then there's the car ad where the chubby test driver gets so excited driving he starts screaming with joy. Except his screams of joy are more like the screeches of a lust-crazed gibbon.

― Jay Vee (Manon_70), Monday, 11 April 2005 16:11 (nineteen years ago) link

three weeks pass...

Two at the moment:
"Love the platforms, Bertie"
and
"Should have to Specsavers"

― The Horse of Babylon's Butler (the pirate king), Tuesday, 3 May 2005 21:13 (eighteen years ago) link

I hate all Sonic ads.

― Miss Misery (thatgirl), Wednesday, 4 May 2005 15:03 (eighteen years ago) link

the new honda adverts - 'it's crazy wise. it's doolally obvious.' stop that. and focusing on the minute percentage of your cars / plants that don't pollute / are recycled is fooling nobody.

the other one, the one with the babies 'why can't technology be as simple as the box it comes in?', 'why can't phones last a month, i want to talk to all the girls'. ick.

the wax virgin adverts. odd that they have to add a hint of machismo into something so feminine.

― koogs (koogs), Monday, 16 May 2005 10:18 (eighteen years ago) link

The blacked out frog ones... Now it looks like he has an YNORMUS one!

― mark grout (mark grout), Monday, 16 May 2005 10:36 (eighteen years ago) link

Stephen Fry has been whoring himself a bit too much lately. Orange and now Twinings tea where he seems to think we will believe the self styled cleverest man in Britain that he does not know how or when to drink Earl Grey Tea!

― Pete (Pete), Monday, 16 May 2005 10:36 (eighteen years ago) link

Whatever the bloody car one that's for people who are "still a bit rebellious". Look, you're buying a fucking 'nice little run around' you are not, nor ever have been, rebellious. Get. The. Fuck. Over. It.

― Anna (Anna), Monday, 16 May 2005 11:14 (eighteen years ago) link

nobby's nuts

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Monday, 16 May 2005 11:22 (eighteen years ago) link

The Volvic one with the stone age man who invents the wheel, the axle and, hence, the pole-dancing platform. Or maybe it's a subtle commentary on men with Stone Age attitudes to gender roles. Oh, hang on...it's not.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Monday, 16 May 2005 11:25 (eighteen years ago) link

It is! You sexist.

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 16 May 2005 11:39 (eighteen years ago) link

I love the Nobby's Nuts ad - anything that has Noddy Holder shouting at people is okay with me.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Monday, 16 May 2005 11:59 (eighteen years ago) link

Michael Winner in drag.

And that damn ringtone ad that incessantly plays on ITV.

― David Merryweather (DavidM), Monday, 16 May 2005 12:04 (eighteen years ago) link

Alice on seeing the first "Sweetie the Chick" ad:

"I WANT ONE!! er, what is it?"

― mark grout (mark grout), Monday, 16 May 2005 12:08 (eighteen years ago) link

Oh, Sweetie the Chick is so last week, it's all about Nessie the Dragon these days...oh God, I fucking DETEST all of these ring tones, and last week I was holding forth about this hate in the office and my boss had no idea what I was on about so one of my colleagues sat and played preview clips of the whole range of shit on the Jamster website all afternoon and I died a little inside.

The farting monkey one is the worst though.

― ailsa (ailsa), Monday, 16 May 2005 21:39 (eighteen years ago) link

two months pass...

The Southern Comfort one with the American backpackers doing their "To Prague!" - "Tickets to Barcelona, Tickets to Barcelona" - shrug - "To Barcelona!" thing is back on our screens and driving me demented. I don't understand why I loathe them quite so much.

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 3 August 2005 19:50 (eighteen years ago) link

Because you're imagining how irritating it would be to be stuck on a train or in a hostel with these drunken, stupid, eejits?

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Wednesday, 3 August 2005 20:15 (eighteen years ago) link

But they're not really drunken and I have no real way of knowing if they're stupid. I think it's their wealth and smugness.

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 3 August 2005 20:19 (eighteen years ago) link

Actually, I think it's their self-reliance and self-absorption.

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 3 August 2005 20:20 (eighteen years ago) link

I really hate them all and I hope they are all dead now.

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 3 August 2005 20:21 (eighteen years ago) link

someday they will be, if they're not now.

― gear (gear), Wednesday, 3 August 2005 20:21 (eighteen years ago) link

It's a comforting thought.

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 3 August 2005 20:23 (eighteen years ago) link

why in Barcelona they probably rented a Hummer and, coked out, drove it off a road and into the water.

― gear (gear), Wednesday, 3 August 2005 20:26 (eighteen years ago) link

Oh dear God! Top of the google results for that advert are people on a C4 forum saying things like "Barcelona (I've wanted to ever since I first saw the Southern Comfort advert, I LOVE that advert!)" and "I love that Southern Comfort ad too! It's so cool!"

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 3 August 2005 20:27 (eighteen years ago) link

Livingston fans love it too!

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 3 August 2005 20:30 (eighteen years ago) link

Gear - do they show it in the States too?

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 3 August 2005 20:31 (eighteen years ago) link

sure enough!

― gear (gear), Wednesday, 3 August 2005 20:32 (eighteen years ago) link

three months pass...

the Bulldog internet advert. why would anyone ever describe the internet as 'a gate half open'?

― koogs (koogs), Thursday, 24 November 2005 10:33 (eighteen years ago) link

Yes, but it's got Delays for the soundtrack, which always makes me happy.

Not a TV ad, but still really really REALLY irritates me. That car advert (Audi?) with all the planets of the solar system - BUT THEY'VE GOT THE ORDER WRONG AND REVERSED VENUS AND MARS!!!

I don't know why that winds me up so much, but it does.

― The Damp Is Rising (kate), Thursday, 24 November 2005 10:36 (eighteen years ago) link

"HI I'M BARRY SCOTT AND I SHOUT"
http://www.recrea.org/pix/barryscott.jpg

― not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Thursday, 24 November 2005 10:38 (eighteen years ago) link

The PC World ads, and all the DFS, Vogue, furniture ones - Guaranteed delivery for Christmas? Do people really go out and buy leather suites at this time of year?

― Rumpie, Thursday, 24 November 2005 10:39 (eighteen years ago) link

Foyle's War is sponsored by AXA, and their "humorous" idents involve people at important/climactic moments (checking the results of a prgnancy test, bursting into a church at the "forever hold your peace" moment of the wedding) shouting I'VE JUST GOT AXA INSURANCE like anyone could possibly give a fuck what insurance you got. They're shit.

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 24 November 2005 11:42 (eighteen years ago) link

Sheila's wheels. Die. Die. And leave that poor dog alone, doesn't he have enough problems driving you harpies around for 24 hours a day. Plus - another fucking 'it's for women, let's use loads of pink.'

― Anna (Anna), Thursday, 24 November 2005 11:47 (eighteen years ago) link

Carlsberg's best takeaway in the world – in fact all the carlsberg ads

― beanz (beanz), Thursday, 24 November 2005 11:52 (eighteen years ago) link

Sheila's wheels
also, on the last shot the road is going the wrong way so it looks like they're reversing at great speed which is not really a good advert for women drivers (not that i have a problem with them before you start).

― not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Thursday, 24 November 2005 11:58 (eighteen years ago) link

But the Sheila's aren't even driving! That poor put-upon dog is driving! I don't even like dogs and I feel for that one.

― Anna (Anna), Thursday, 24 November 2005 12:20 (eighteen years ago) link

not-goodwin mistakes dogs for women = he is even worse than those who complain about women drivers

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 24 November 2005 12:21 (eighteen years ago) link

I didn't even know there was a dog in that advert...

― Rumpie, Thursday, 24 November 2005 12:24 (eighteen years ago) link

not-goodwin mistakes dogs for women
after 4 pints, who doesn't?

rumpie, me neither.

― not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Thursday, 24 November 2005 12:28 (eighteen years ago) link

"That's more than Lucky..."

― Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Thursday, 24 November 2005 12:29 (eighteen years ago) link

I think the only Sheila's Wheels advert I have seen involved an australian transvestite and no dogs.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 24 November 2005 12:34 (eighteen years ago) link

I *love* the Sheila's Wheels advert.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Thursday, 24 November 2005 12:38 (eighteen years ago) link

Actually, it's Sheilas' Wheels isn't it? I remember checking it and approving at the cinema.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Thursday, 24 November 2005 12:40 (eighteen years ago) link

Not Australian, actually just part of esure, yawn

― Mädchen (Madchen), Thursday, 24 November 2005 12:41 (eighteen years ago) link

On a slightly less amusing note, there's an ad currently running on the digital channels for an animal charity. This ad features one of those dancing bears which has gone mad. It's just horrible. I watched it all the way through once, thinking it was going to have a happy ending (like the Dogs' Trust ads do), but it didn't. I have to leave the room when it's on, I find it so upsetting.

Back on the normal side of things, I still am the only person who likes the man in the Phones 4 U ads. He's crazy, yes, but he seems to have enormously strong roots in the community.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Thursday, 24 November 2005 12:43 (eighteen years ago) link

"Car insurance at mice's prices"

Eh? Are mice well-known for securing excellent deals on their third-party policies?

― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Thursday, 24 November 2005 12:46 (eighteen years ago) link

Skipping 2668 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.