worst commercials on television

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that one drives me nuts too.

Zero pumps, massive boner (thebingo), Monday, 4 April 2011 19:54 (thirteen years ago) link

there's a whole 'behind the scenes' with 'buddy mignon' the singer on youtube, not crossing that line. glad that dudes getting work though, he's a tv commercial trouper from way back

tremendoid, Monday, 4 April 2011 20:01 (thirteen years ago) link

five months pass...

I swear this commercial is like 3 minutes long.. some guy who thinks he's hilarious pretending he's a Billy Mays dude and it says nothing about the product until the last 15 seconds.

billstevejim, Wednesday, 14 September 2011 23:02 (twelve years ago) link

one year passes...

aaaaargh these state farm "like a good neighbor" commercials

"I have blah blah insurance so person come help" I want to shoot these people and leave their bodies rotting by their cars

huun huurt 2 (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 24 April 2013 02:07 (eleven years ago) link

eleven months pass...

this one is kinda tone deaf in the same vein as that "life is good" honda ad

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNvgT93GATo

christmas candy bar (al leong), Wednesday, 16 April 2014 21:35 (ten years ago) link

The anti-smoking ones with the lady ("Terry") who was dying of some vicious form of cancer talking with her tracheotomy tube in place. Jesus Christ.

Assholes on Boats: A Billy Zane Retrospective (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Sunday, 20 April 2014 09:43 (ten years ago) link

New iPhone ad (GIGAANTIC! GIGAANTIC! A BIG BIG LOVE!) is annoying and ubiquitous as hell, but at least a return to "LOOK AT ALL THE FUN YOU COULD HAVE BUT WON'T!" as opposed to the horrible "profound" streak Apple ads were on.

Slumdog Baseballionaire (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Friday, 2 May 2014 08:20 (nine years ago) link

two months pass...

iPhone "I'm living the life of dreams" ad. Horrible song, horrible "you can't raise your kids without Apple" message.

oblique blasphemies (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Wednesday, 16 July 2014 06:46 (nine years ago) link

well yeah apple is terrible

brimstead, Wednesday, 16 July 2014 06:51 (nine years ago) link

u.s. tv ads have gotten slightly funnier in the last month or so. there was a wave of over the top wtf misogynism for a while there that seems to have ebbed

brimstead, Wednesday, 16 July 2014 06:53 (nine years ago) link

The ones with the giant marionettes interacting with people.

Immediate Follower (NA), Wednesday, 16 July 2014 14:21 (nine years ago) link

mummy, what's neu-ter-ing?

Iago Galdston, Wednesday, 16 July 2014 16:32 (nine years ago) link

one month passes...

The new "I've fallen and I can't get up" ad with a woman at the bottom of her basement stairs crying and yelling "HEEEELPPPP!" is just a little too realistic and horrifying.

il balletto da bronx, yo (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Sunday, 31 August 2014 08:46 (nine years ago) link

There's one about Chicken wrappers where the dad starts rapping that I find really wearing.
I think there are another couple that I tend to hit the remote over but I can't think what they are right now.

Stevolende, Sunday, 31 August 2014 09:35 (nine years ago) link

this creepy miller lite commercial where they claim the invention of lite beer led to your, the viewer's, conception

linda cardellini (zachlyon), Sunday, 31 August 2014 20:50 (nine years ago) link

SIX CALLERS AHEAD OF US, JIMMY

andrew m., Wednesday, 3 September 2014 14:41 (nine years ago) link

Some of these commercials these days make me miss the good ole days of Go Meat!

andrew m., Wednesday, 3 September 2014 14:41 (nine years ago) link

For instance, those Geico ones: "Everybody knows that ... yeah but did you know that ... " Ugh.

andrew m., Wednesday, 3 September 2014 14:45 (nine years ago) link

one month passes...

The new Blu e-cig ad with the soul song in it is terrible - Stephen Dorf livin' it up in various C-list ways, the line "TAKE BACK YOUR FREEDOM" apparently designed to appeal to angry white guys - but that song is fucking hilariously bad:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFVYMP1skvk

It's apparently by a band called T-Bird and the Breaks, which... yeah. Perfect.

sink floyd (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Wednesday, 8 October 2014 11:57 (nine years ago) link

nine months pass...

Recent terrible songs in commercials:

Some fake Fred Cole sounding guy singing too fast to be deciphered over modern garage pop, required catchy "WHOOO HOOO OOOOH OOOH" chorus inserted as predictably as computer code. Car commercial. Garage-indie-pop bands really need to stop selling songs to commercials.

Think this other one is for a clothing store or something, pseudo-mod-soul vibe with a woman singing what sounds like "You and me we could be BAEH-FOOT-AHN, perception to get AROUND, WHAHH-OHH WHAHH-OHH."

that's why god destroyed the radio (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Saturday, 25 July 2015 07:37 (eight years ago) link

three months pass...

I just last night saw a nauseating commercial for an IBS medication with this thing as the mascot:

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CSMxKqmUcAAHByg.jpg

And yes, it is indeed an anthropomorphic pile of intestines. At one point, this horrific thing sits down for a meal and tucks its napkin between the ropes of intestine. It was to barf.

Trimming The Hegyes: The Life & Times Of A Sweathog's Barber (Old Lunch), Thursday, 29 October 2015 17:30 (eight years ago) link

Good god.

si monvmentvm reqvires, pvmpkin spice (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Thursday, 29 October 2015 17:49 (eight years ago) link

I think I contracted IBS from that commercial.

Trimming The Hegyes: The Life & Times Of A Sweathog's Barber (Old Lunch), Thursday, 29 October 2015 17:49 (eight years ago) link

all of them

F♯ A♯ (∞), Thursday, 29 October 2015 18:00 (eight years ago) link

three months pass...

"I'm in the Buick."
"BUHHHH I DON'T SEE ANY BUICK!!!!!!!!!!"

Essentially they're saying "yeah, our cars are shit but now they don't look like shit. As much."

we salute you, our half-inflated dark lord (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Friday, 19 February 2016 08:36 (eight years ago) link

"You won't believe it's a Skoda"

bored at work (snoball), Friday, 19 February 2016 08:51 (eight years ago) link

four months pass...

Fuckin Bon Jovi shilling for some cable company.

Have you hugged your timeghoul today? (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Monday, 11 July 2016 20:04 (seven years ago) link

Those are horrible, but the Chevy focus-group campaign is worse. Almost revived this thread to gripe about those.

pleas to Nietzsche (WilliamC), Monday, 11 July 2016 20:06 (seven years ago) link

3) Two dudes playing piano with their cocks (Aus erectile dysfunction ad [fucking horrendous])

ILX posts that haunt you.

a little too mature to be cute (Aimless), Monday, 11 July 2016 20:07 (seven years ago) link

Those are horrible, but the Chevy focus-group campaign is worse. Almost revived this thread to gripe about those.

yeah definitely. wish I could explain why they piss me off so much, guess it's just the toxic smugness of bearded guy + the incredible stupidity of the totally-not-fake focus group..."IS THIS A LEXUS!? DOES IT COST FIFTY THOUSAND DOLLARS!??"

frogbs, Monday, 11 July 2016 21:28 (seven years ago) link

"...and I want you to reply IN EMOTICONS!!!"

Have you hugged your timeghoul today? (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Monday, 11 July 2016 22:36 (seven years ago) link

"If I throw eggs at you, will you be more likely or less likely to buy a Chevy?"

pleas to Nietzsche (WilliamC), Monday, 11 July 2016 23:14 (seven years ago) link

"How many fingers would you be willing to chop off to drive this pickup?" *places meat cleaver on butcher block*

Have you hugged your timeghoul today? (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Monday, 11 July 2016 23:21 (seven years ago) link

The apple ad with this shite, maudlin British hip-hop track about a guy who, sigh, just wishes he had a little sister

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7HiB-hNt_mw

Have you hugged your timeghoul today? (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Tuesday, 12 July 2016 09:10 (seven years ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8UV7SAhvG4

Iago Galdston, Tuesday, 12 July 2016 14:20 (seven years ago) link

one month passes...

Marco! Polo!
Marco! Polo!
Marco! Polo!

Hamilton, Joe Frank & Two-Thirds of Asphyx (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Saturday, 27 August 2016 06:51 (seven years ago) link

three months pass...

I just found out the bearded actor in the Chevy ads is named Potsch Boyd. And now I'm ready for the earth to die in nuclear fire.

rudy githyanki (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Thursday, 8 December 2016 21:41 (seven years ago) link

two months pass...

Afoot and light-hearted I take to the road
Healthy, free, the world before me

OKAY I GET IT, FUUUUUUUCK OFF WITH YOUR WALT WHITMAN

Anthology of Literature's Finest Penis Descriptions (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Saturday, 11 February 2017 11:57 (seven years ago) link

two weeks pass...

THE SEVERED HEADS OF CHILDREN SING TO YOU OF THE FUTURE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e1b-Zt2IJl8

three months pass...

"in 200 feet, stop for what most people consider "authentic" Cajun food"

when our phone ais become insufferable hipsters

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Friday, 16 June 2017 22:21 (six years ago) link

That Dorito's one where they say the chips are like having a baby dragon. WTF

Unchanging Window (Ross), Thursday, 22 June 2017 06:49 (six years ago) link

one for the stoners that

pray for BoJo (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 22 June 2017 08:25 (six years ago) link

R-O-C-K IN THE U-S-A!
R-O-C-K IN THE U-S-A!
R-O-C-K IN THE U-S-A!

30 seconds later

R-O-C-K IN THE U-S-A!
R-O-C-K IN THE U-S-A!
R-O-C-K IN THE U-S-A!

Puke and Other Poems (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Thursday, 29 June 2017 07:10 (six years ago) link

four months pass...
three months pass...

So the endless gospel sample in the Chromebook ads says "First you got a light bull due/Then you got a gas bill too" and I at least know that. But I kind of never want to hear that remix ever again ever.

my dreams in the hell-pits (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Saturday, 10 February 2018 10:24 (six years ago) link

one month passes...

dilly dilly

mookieproof, Sunday, 25 March 2018 18:18 (six years ago) link

where did that shit come from, that's not even real, you'd be kicked out of the ren faire for that shit

my dreams in the hell-pits (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Saturday, 31 March 2018 21:41 (six years ago) link

tbf i'd probably think it was really funny if i were 8yo

mookieproof, Saturday, 31 March 2018 22:11 (six years ago) link

one year passes...

https://i.stack.imgur.com/ADPFV.png

fuck you

also the real spokesperson's actual name is 'potsch boyd'

mookieproof, Wednesday, 29 May 2019 02:37 (four years ago) link

this is undoubtedly the worst thing i've ever watched pic.twitter.com/G08EvRQ6du

— Florb Netterson (@comicpanopticon) May 28, 2019

Simon H., Wednesday, 29 May 2019 02:51 (four years ago) link


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