Footballers who really don't need to be on Twitter

http://twitter.com/WayneRoutledge/status/53805250355802112

lol

WayneRoutledge
Okok... #aprilfools #gotme
less than 20 seconds ago via web

http://www.whoateallthepies.tv/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/Cesc.jpg

http://i52.tinypic.com/riclec.png

No longer on twitter, or in a job.

alan smith's ex-bird has hijacked his twitter http://twitter.com/AlanSmithy17

(American) footballer courts controversy by rainsing good points

"What kind of person celebrates death?" he wrote. "It's amazing how people can HATE a man they have never even heard speak. We've only heard one side..."

He tried to clarify those comments Wednesday.

"This controversial statement was something I said in response to the amount of joy I saw in the event of a murder. I don't believe that this is an issue of politics or American pride; but one of religion, morality, and human ethics," he wrote.

After quoting a bible verse, he wrote: "I wasn't questioning Bin Laden's evil acts. I believe that he will have to face God for what he has done. I was reflecting on our own hypocrisy. During 9/11 we watched in horror as parts of the world celebrated death on our soil. Earlier this week, parts of the world watched us in horror celebrating a man's death."

AlanSmithy17 Alan Smith17
Alan had the choice to go play for Man Utd or Tottenham, Man Utd offered more money and you see where he went
8 hours ago

a scathing indictment of the man I think all will agree

Just a bit of banter:

Wayne Rooney lashed out after a Liverpool supporter branded him a “fat whore’’ and “ugly lil nonse” on Twitter.

Rooney, 25, promptly challenged fan Sam Oldham to meet him at United’s training ground for a real-life showdown.

He threatened: “I’ll put u asleep within 10 ­seconds hope u turn up if u dont gonna tell ­everyone ur scared u ­little nit. I’ll be ­waiting.’’

The bitter war of words, played out in front of Rooney’s 563,000 Twitter followers, will not impress his boss Sir Alex Ferguson.

And the 69-year-old manager will be tempted to give Rooney the infamous ­Fergie hairdryer treatment, a toe-to-toe bawling out.

The club spends millions ­employing security guards to protect their squad of stars.

A club insider said: “The last thing we need is rival fans turning up ­looking for a fight. The boss will be livid.’’

Rooney and Oldham traded insults shortly after midnight yesterday.

Oldham told the star: “Rooney ya fat whore ill smash ya head in with a pitchin wedge an bury ya with a ballast fork ya fat ugly lil nonse.’’

Fuming Rooney then ­challenged the fan to a ­confrontation at United’s Carrington training ground.

He wrote: “haha you know were I train every day kid come and do it good luck.’’

Oldham replied: “and ill be down tomorrow lad in me twin turbo ­nissan micra’’.

Rooney retorted: “Cool bring ur sandwedge girl.’’

United fans who saw the exchange started blitzing Oldham with abuse.

Both men then appeared to back down. Oldham wrote: “I wasn’t bein a hardman its called a joke mate.’’

Rooney added: “Haha bit of banter and people go nuts chill all people.”

The footballer did not say if he knew Oldham, whose Twitter ­account was shut down yesterday.

ah must have posted this after you on other thread...apologies

haha bit of banter m8ty

Footballers who really don't need their wives to be on Twitter

Becky Doyle revealed on Twitter that her husband, Colin Doyle, and Ben Foster, his Birmingham team-mate, had arrived home late after the club's end-of-season awards ceremony on Monday night. "****** off with my husband getting in at 4am with fossy (Foster) and waking me up," Doyle posted on Twitter. "Celebrate next week when your (sic) safe. Have some respect."

was foster going back for a few games of pro ev or something?

obv his workload is lighter now he has served his time with england.

Would ask why Birmingham hold an end-of-season awards ceremony but suppose there'd just be replies about the Emirates Cup.

http://twitter.com/RavelMorrison49/status/71321933295263746

This kid is seriously stupid. He's not going to make it, is he?

In early 2011, he received a 12-month referral order and was ordered to pay £1,445 in costs and compensation after admitting two counts of witness intimidation.[8] In May of the same year Morrison appeared at Salford magistrates court and was charged with criminal damage and assaulting his girlfriend.[9]

every chance of being the next [CONTROVERSIAL SUPERINJUNCTION EDIT]

Not mutually exclusive tbf xp. What does that tweet mean anyway?

I think he was disappointed with the recipients of the awards and the entire night in general, apart from the minor consolation of his chum "tunners" winning something.

Not mutually exclusive, but he's already had two court appearances and has just slagged off his club's player of the year awards. Doesn't really look all that promising. Most players wait to go off the rails until they at least get into the first team.

Xref with 'rap lyrics written in proper english'

(xp)

P sure eighth most expensive player ever wor Andy was on dat ting even when in the reserves

raheem sterling's twitter is fairly funny...

"@HUTSPiCEmara why ave you tried 2 try n talk aloud of crap 10:06 PM May 18th via web in reply to ImaraROSE"

so many people try n talk aloud of crap?

rioferdy5 Rio Ferdinand
I'm on the UB40.....red red wiiiiiiine!! #oooff!
51 minutes ago

WayneRooney Wayne Rooney
@
@rioferdy5 don't have to much. #stayonyourfeet
40 minutes ago

mildly funny meme-usage there? And the mistake there aside Wazza generally seems surprisingly coherent and capable of spelling and such. I'll have to avoid following him so I never end up accidentally liking him.

I love ol' wazza.

he has a new head

http://yfrog.com/gznpmbtj

@Nanas08
Samir Nasri Official

@immildlyracist listen come in front of me tell me what u tweet i will show who is th c***

lol at Twitter handle "immildlyracist"

Find it hard to believe the big girl Sami Nasri could ever beat someone up.

WayneRooney Wayne Rooney
Me and Jay z chilling in Barbados yfrog.com/kjqeouj
16 Jun

http://desmond.yfrog.com/Himg739/scaled.php?tn=0&server=739&filename=qeou.jpg&xsize=640&ysize=640

WayneRooney Wayne Rooney
Haha it's a lookalike people @jiggawhat
16 Jun

i can see one similarity yes wayne

Ugh, son

If you were going to punt £12k on fake hair would you get a fake receding hairline? For that money I'd want a full head of hair.

not sure i'd go for 2 all over either

http://l.yimg.com/a/p/sp/editorial_image/f5/f5d7e0d3cc20713549dc49944112e62b/this_is_how_a_footballer_introduces_himself_to_twitter.jpg

And then:

https://twitter.com/#!/HayleyGa11agher/status/95611671795609600

Hahaha

LOL

Thanks Paul.

sandroraniere Sandro Raniere
I had my check up today with the doctor, and he said my knee getting better.

What a shit cunt: https://twitter.com/#!/Georgeporter15/status/154992549965213696

The USA international was left stunned as Wigan's then second-string keeper Floyd Croll had Howard scrambling into the back of his net with an incredible Pat Jennings-esque kick at Moss Lane in November 2005.

Croll, now plying his trade lower down the football pyramid with Isthmian League outfit AFC Sudbury, immediately took to Twitter to remind the 32-year-old of his freakish feat.

'I have scored to haven't I Mr Howard #iownyoustill'

https://twitter.com/cesc4official/statuses/156436128906477568

Georgeporter15 George Porter
Pizza express is so underated.
27 Dec

footballers who need to be on ILX

oh Szczesnypaws

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/football/16498907.stm

jeez louise

It has a different meaning in Poland.

Rapists obviously dress badly in Poland

Not sure a guy in an Arsenal keeper's jersey can call other people out for dressing like a rapist.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-oxfordshire-16511735

This joker apparently said he'd have to padlock his arse if he had the bed next to Gareth Thomas in Celeb Big Brother. Stay classy, footballers on Twitter.

if nothing else this is hopefully going to contribute to a widespread understanding that ppl on Twitter who do that 'hashtag followed by several words run together' thing after every single thing they tweet are horrible thickos

twitter hashtags are the most banal thing ever and possibly the most pass/agg thing ever when they consist of #compoundphraseshighlightingenemiesnotionalfaults

― jhøshea nrq (nakhchivan), Thursday, January 5, 2012 2:37 PM (6 days ago)