I Lost A Coughdrop in His Asshole: The ILX Gays TMI Thread

stomping guy started tecting me 10 times a day and getting weird and i was like, "if you're acting possessive and not like a client and we haven't even met yet, then we're not meeting, sorry bloke"

would def text w/ a guy 10 times a day for $3,000

if you saw these texts and the frequency, you would've been like "no" too, just trust me. i could really use the money (like really use the money) and i decided no. it was when he said he was 'worried' about me after we hadn't talked for two days that i was like, "you're not my friend, you're a fuckin guy who wants me to stomp on him and fuck him for money, get it straight." and he kept on with his weirdness. i can't stand that in lovers, much less in clients.

anyway.

Ha. "Bloke." Was your stomper persona British?

xpost

tbh i was worried when you went a weekend w/o posting to this thread!!

like that you were locked in a dungeon somewhere in LA

Glad I'm not having to choose between bursting a feller's nuts and receiving his texts tbh.

i watched a lot of british tv this past weekend, i was ill. (for some reason, only reading and watching movies appeal to me anymore when i'm sick, ILX is too much).

it really is

the preview is totally teal & orange.xls

didn't travel with my enema bulb because going out was spur of the moment, and despite my best efforts to clean....

i ruined this guy's sheets.

that said, he was a bit...passionless. like, robotic. so in a way, i'm glad.

Oh no! Santorum!

RIP ;_;

he was one of those types who was like "yeah, you gonna cum? you gonna cum?" and i was like "dude, maybe if you stopped talking i would be able to"

I CANNOT STAND people who do that.

ugh! yes

some ppl get off on that -- it's sort of a dom thing no?

i can never tell if it's a dom thing or just desperation (or exasperation)

or bad communication skills

w/ str8 dudes its usually fear of inadequacy fwiw

indeed

tru

god, IMPE guys who do that feel inexperienced/inadequte and think sex means acting like u are in a crappy porno

"YEAH, YOU LIKE THAT?? YOU LIKE THAT, DON'T YA."

professional?

Yeah, the one guy I had in mind basically acts like it's a porno every time we fuck, like "Yeah, you like that?" and all that shit. God, it's so dull. Also he refuses to take his shirt off and he keeps trying to have phone/chat sex with me.

if anything coming out of yr mouth is not some variation on i feel awesome / you are awesome then u are doing it wrong

^

This thread is worth it for straight dudes just to see that some things are the same across sexes, and guys are just as ridiculous with other guys as they are with women.

roxy otm

roxy otm, when I am pretending I am in a crappy porno I yell all kinds of bullshit

I hooked up with a guy a couple of times who I thought was saying either "oh yeh, son of a bitch" or "oh you son of a bitch." I finally figured out it was the latter.

professional?

― sarahel, Wednesday, February 2, 2011 2:55 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark

i loled

if anything coming out of yr mouth is not some variation on i feel awesome / you are awesome then u are doing it wrong

as with most sweeping generalizations, presumptive and not true for all situations.

so lick my balls.

I really want to make a joke based on 'if anything coming out of your mouth is not jizz you're doing it wrong' but that would just be wrong (in more ways than one).

when I first read that post I 1/2 expected it to say something to that effect

morbius otm about that not always being true

yeah look whatever. was not intended to be gospel. for christ's sake.

yes, sometimes "so, lick my balls" is the right thing to say

This thread makes me think of that situation guys sometimes run into, the one where a girl is giving you head but not going down to suck on your nuts even though you'd really like her to. So you sheepishly ask, "could you suck my balls?" hoping she will, and then she does, but all you can think about is the sound of your own voice asking "could you suck my balls?".

― Bryan (Bryan), Wednesday, December 1, 2004 10:05 PM (6 years ago) Bookmark

lol I was looking for that post. Bryan sounds like he was getting head from girls who were doing it wrong. He's otm though. That or any variation thereof is maybe the worst sounding question ever. Best to make sure that it never has to be asked imo.

using your mouth like a hand is the key to good head. massage, don't eat.

Wait, doing it right always involves sucking on nuts? I am missing out, here.

haha, i was looking for that post too

buzza's on vacation, i'm filling in.

maybe you need to do it in a fake voice, like darth vader or something

this is the biggest lol from The House Bunny imo:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NWYsekCJdac

*suck my balls* [exorcist voice]

are you drunk too grady?

lol no

are u a tranny chaser?

i did have a cocktail about half an hour ago but i try and steer clear of the ILTMI gays thread when i'm intoxicated