thread to get over a breakup

awwwwwww

I've had a quite a few cats in my lifetime, and they've all had different personalities. But know this: if you're the only person around, they'll bond with you to some degree. Some will be super sweet, some will just be nice and civil (kind of like the one I have now). Best thing to do is ask the shelter if you can foster one you like for a couple weeks to see how it's going to work out.

before you hand the cat over take it over to the new place in the dead of night and teach it how to find its way home using a memorable route dotted with cat treats.

<3

have never heard of sharing custody of a cat btw, but maybe you could have him come back for visits?

anyway, if you do give him up, you are now A Cat Person and will be able to find new joy with another puss, even though you miss the old one

mookie, I'm sorry. You were nice to me in DC when I was posting away about a failed relationship. I thought that was upsetting but it was child's play compared to dealing with resolving something long-term.

my current ex texted me about a half hour ago. we haven't really spoke much or seen each other in the last few weeks, but we're on good terms. so she's badly hinting that she got a new job and wants to celebrate, asked what I was doing, basically trying to hint that she wants to do something.

I, of course, am not REALLY in the mood, I'm mondo relaxed and watching The Godfather atm, but I do care about her and feel bad that she has nobody to celebrate with, so I offered, and of course every idea I come up with, doesn't sound good to her.

On the other hand, I'm concerned, as one of the main reasons I haven't gone out of my way to hang with her is that I want us to have time apart, because I don't want to lead her on, and have been afraid that she'll get attached again and want to get back together (and I don't want to).

I hate feeling like a bad guy but I'm kinda just hoping she decides not to go out tonight. I feel bad but it's like, she did also text me out of the blue and kinda dump this in my lap at almost 9 pm on a Friday night, not so subtley hinting that she wants to celebrate, then shoots down any idea I politely suggest.

am I being insensitive?

u r being too sensitive

no, that's fuckin infuriating when people do the "i don't know what i want to do tonight!" but then proceed to shoot down anything you could possibly suggest. sb her.

thanks guys.

yea i mean honestly I just don't feel like GETTING UP and leaving the house tonight, really, cuz I have a lot else planned this weekend already.

if you start dating your ex she becomes your girlfriend again

themoreyouknow.gif

i ain't going to though

glad we talked you out of it!

lol grady

lol it wouldn't have been a date, it woulda been 'friendly hangout', but the precise reason I didn't want to do it is that both parties might not have understoodi t that way.

but here I sit still, so I wound up staying in. lol

sb her.

― and you are a part of everything and everything is like melting (ytth)

done.

she was shooting down your stuff because she doesn't want to get back together, she just wanted to get her smang on to celebrate and then drift off

Doin' the schadenfreude dance again, I am. Well kind of. Poor R. I feel sorry for him. Why? I'm too nice.

was he dumped because of the gig he played last week

Ha! Naw. I dont know wtf is going on but yer theyre "on a break" lol whatever that means, o well.

- almost had a date this past weekend
- did not have a date, which is likely just as well
- not really sure what to do with this person tbh
- were my ex to learn of it, she would think i had been cheating with this person all along, which is not true but makes me uncomfortable

- were my ex to learn of it, she would think i had been cheating with this person all along, which is not true but makes me uncomfortable

feeling this

This is the bastard part of that just after a breakup bit innit. I dont know how long ppl expect you to walk around in sackcloth and ashes but its never enough for some ppl.

Either they trusted you while in the relationship and will know that, or they didn't and the relationship wasn't built on trust anyway. People will try to believe all kinds of bullshit to remind themselves that a breakup was warranted and it's not your job to prove them right or wrong.

I'm usually the one being dumped, so its not come up that often for me, ha. :(

i remember an ex that dumped me getting all sad and butthurt when she saw me out with someone new a full month and a half later. i didn't feel any sympathy whatsoever.

six weeks clearly wasn't enough of a mourning period.

if you're the dumpee approx 10 seconds is enough mourning imo

Hahaha totally OTM. Fuck em.

My ex is already like "oh well I'm fed up anyway hey btw i gave this cute girl my # on the weekend lol" ... so yeah, he hasnt changed a bit :|

My crazy ex-fiancee from a few years back was banging the bartender at our favorite establishment within two months, and married to a dude she used to date within like... six?

I am pretty chill with all of that tbh

People gotta get on with their lives hey.

I think I find it more weird when someone's still hung up over a person 2 or more years later. Thats just... odd.

Hung up on/still miserable/not seeing anyone else, i mean.

Can't argue that. I've been in a similar situation, where a girl I was mad about dumped me FOR another guy and embarked on a relationship that quickly fizzled. So I became interested in someone else and things were going great and then she calls me crying and sad and I really didn't have a whole lot of sympathy at all, considering she'd already started up with this other fella behind my back.

That all happened about six years ago, but we're best friends now (or, more accurately, like Jerry and Elaine from Seinfeld).

yeah :( and i know a very very good example of that

intervention from friends is imminent

xpost

That all happened about six years ago, but we're best friends now (or, more accurately, like Jerry and Elaine from Seinfeld).

Hahah oh shit that sounds like me and Nick.

yeah :( and i know a very very good example of that

intervention from friends is imminent

Hm, curious, anyone i kno?

not really, an ex of mine from maaaany years ago. needs a huge kickstart to get over her cunt recent ex

ex texted me AGAIN yesterday. flat out ignored it. not gonna be your scratching post when YOU dumped ME!

Good for you *nods*.

Good luck Mooks.

Breaking up sounds awful. It's been soooo long since I've had to endure it that sometimes I forget how tough it is.

Yeah not something I care to go thru again in a hurry, esp the "oh god you mean I have to start again!?" kind where its been years. Ugh.

Doesnt make me feel any less lonely mind u.

I'm worried about dating again when I lose Lloyd. (He's old enough that even if he does die a natural death, I'm still going to outlive him by 20-30 years.) I'll get to make all of the relationship mistakes that you all made in your late teens or early twenties, but I'll get to make them with people in their forties, fifties, or sixties--people (I'm assuming will be) less tolerant of that kind of thing.

people in their 40s, 50s and 60s are probably a lot less nitpicky and bullshitty i would hope

I'm worried that I'll look less like Woman With Very Little Relationship Experience and more like Crazy Girlfriend to them.

why are you even thinking about this? there's really nothing can be done about that pesky process called "aging" w/r/t looks, but you're in control of how you approach life
just live well now, it will make you feel better when you're old
sorry to get all self helpy but it's true

watch a lot of golden girls and study their behavior. you'll have it made.

Good advice in any situation, actually.

Dear T*** (my ex-ex),

It is unfair that even though it's now been 1 year and 3 months since we broke up, I still miss you a lot, and that you seem to get more attractive as time goes on. Also it sucks that today is the two year anniversary of our Valentine's Day dinner at C@rmela's, the first of many Italian restaurants we visited together.

So pathetic is it that I think of you more now than my most recent ex, and can't find excuses to hate you anymore like I used to be able to.

*sigh*

Yours truly,

R0b

you're posting that here instead of actually sending it to her, right?