bill simmons IS bill simmons IN the book of BASKETBALL

also, isn't a woman who shares your interests more attractive? no -- they're just for the other stuff, like bearing not-necessarily-wanted babies

Yeah that's sorta what I was getting at but didn't phrase it correctly. Women aren't allowed to taint the purity of homosocial guy stuff or we will literally become women.

because guys just need to do things with other guys sometimes

*pause*

man, are there any non-shitty sportswriters at all? like who write intersting and are not douche bags?

― wiz kelefa sanneh claus (m bison), Tuesday, December 21, 2010 8:15 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark

Gregg Easterbrook?

lol you trolling

yes i am : )

I imagine his frat boy fanbase might email him some reasons why they aren't - entirely - against hoards of drunk girls in las vegas

What I find to be offensive about his constantly recurring refrain is that he seems like he's going to DIE if he doesn't have dude time that is separate and apart from time with women, and women who don't respect that just don't know their place.

Single-sex outings are not just for dudes. And he's a douchebag for implying it. And yeah, if you want to have an all-male fantasy football league, have an all-male fantasy football league. Its just like if you want to go hang out with your buddies and not your wife/gf, go do it. Don't act like its something you are entitled to and/or must necessarily have in order to be a complete human being.

well right. that it's something to be aggrieved about is what's so o_O about his whole ish. i am all for dude time for dudes to be dudes (ffs i am scheduling a second-annual boys only no girls allowed ski trip w/bros right now), but wouldn't pretend for a second that if/when some wives/girlfriends show up that they are anything but completely welcome.

honestly can't understand how his wife puts up with it, esp when he's airing out his insecurities in a column read by millions(?) of ppl

This reminds me of the Leslie Mann and Paul Rudd relaysh in knocked up. "you wanna go to India? Go to India. Go to India." and when he's caught going to his fantasy baseball league and confesses that he leaves home to do shit by himself. And she's all I like spiderman. Like women wanna do shit by themselves sometimes too but they aren't so selfish (ime) to feel entitled and whine about it.

Also lol @ simmons' basically advocating for separate but equal fantasy leagues. Need some espn v board of education shit right herre.

honestly can't understand how his wife puts up with it, esp when he's airing out his insecurities in a column read by millions(?) of ppl

― kanellos (gbx), Monday, December 27, 2010 12:11 PM (12 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

the millions of dollars prob help

and the fact that its clearly shtick

His wife's sidebar columns for ESPN confirmed for me that he is married to a woman who validates his worldview.

Yeah. She's probably not too pissed when they get the royalty checks. Fair point.

i feel like we are almost at the point of nick picking bill simmons where i come to his defense, ehhh

His dad seems like a cool dude.

i know it's different people posting, but the difference between this thread and the adam carolla thread is sort of amazing to me.

yeah i would never set foot in an adam carolla thread

haha ditto

more like ball semens

carolla thread is for true g's only, u scrubs wouldnt be welcome anyway

dont want to alarm u all but simmons has a column up comparing brady/manning to biggie/tupac

the comparison is basically pointless but the football content of the column is good

lol whats up w/him making up fake nicknames for pats/colts games

I really liked it, especially the Mo Cheeks coda at the end, and all of the stuff where Brady is unconcerned about where things match up on the mythical lists of greatness. Like the whole point of the article other than Peyton Manning and Tom Brady are good at quarterbacking is that the amount of column inches and sports talk radio/TV hours spent engaged in the discussion are basically just unnecessary entertainments unrelated to the actual games and those involved. He spends all this time discussing EPIC RIVALRY and then Brady is like "Yeah Peyty's a good dude, I'm just tryna do me"

simmons comes this close to owning up to being a fabulist then backs off w/thats what its all abt vegas baby!

typical

whats a fabulist

like, the best list ever, obviously! Duh.

http://grab.by/8fJO

check out this sweet chrome plugin i have

nice to see he hasn't lost his touch for absurd statistical prediction allowing manning to smash every cumulative record including favre's game streak

cf. his utterly ridiculous prediction of durant's stats from before last year where his reasoning was basically "he improved every stat 30%, that should continue indefinitely with no leveling off"

u couldnt have just said 'liar'?

tbh at first i thought u were implying he was a homo

haha

I liked that article but homie needs an editor.

lol tamtam

actually a good summary of most of his brady articles would be 'mancrush but no homo lol'

http://deadspin.com/5733157/police-called-to-bill-simmonss-home-for-burglary-only-to-find-mighty-mighty-bosstone-in-socks

sports guy bros down w/dickie barrett in l.a. *boston explodes*

inventor of ska breaks into sports writers house

yeah, i still get really excited about the trade value column

its a great feature 4 sure

lol "empty calories all-star team"

37. Serge Ibaka
Think how much better he's gotten just in the past 12 months … then think about the fact that he's only 21 … then remember that, by the time he turned 20, he had already survived a violent civil war in the Congo, been separated from his 18 siblings, survived on his own in Spain and Oklahoma City, learned his third and fourth languages and morphed into a playoff contender's key shot-blocker/rebounder despite the fact that he started playing organized basketball only five years ago. I'm not betting against Sergeballu LaMu Sayonga Loom Walahas Jonas Hugo Ibaka.

i like this argument

4. Derrick Rose
I still have him as the MVP. If you disagree, go look at the standings, try to find me 10 games in which Carlos Boozer and Joakim Noah played together, then watch Keith Bogans play for 10 minutes. Derrick Rose did more for that team through the first 50 games than anyone else did for their team; doesn't make him the best player, just the most valuable. At least so far. Of course, we can't sleep on this scenario, courtesy of Tim in Troy:

"I think we could have a Hakeem Olajuwon/David Robinson situation brewing with the 2011 MVP: What if Rose gets presented with the trophy in front of LeBron before a Bulls-Heat Round 2 playoff game? I picture a standard LeBron Eff You game (40, 10 and 10, five mean dunks, sits for the fourth quarter) making Hakeem's shakedown of The Admiral look like a birthday present."

Great call. Yet here's the difference between Rose and Robinson: Rose would get ticked off by the Eff You performance, try to match it … and then it would be on like Donkey Kong. Have I mentioned how excited I am for the 2011 playoffs? I've mentioned that, right? We're definitely getting Boston-Chicago, Boston-Miami or Chicago-Miami in Round 2. Round 2!!!! Any one of those three matchups will be old-school, '80s-style, no-handshaking bloodbaths. I can't wait for the refs to get overprotective and screw it up.

ok this enrages me for a number of reasons a. the mvp is not necessarily the best nba player inane self serving media fallacy b. the bulls are winning w/defense (1st in defensive efficiency, 17th in O) and rose is not a good defender c. if rose gets exposed in the playoffs its not going to be by someone who plays a dif position scoring a lot of points its gonna be by a team baiting him into taking bad shots making turnovers and exposing his defense d. the ever present kobe bryant memorial spectacularness premium, rose is not playing nearly as good as the same old real mvp candidate guys, but he looks really good doing it

rose is not playing nearly as good as the same old real mvp candidate guys, but he looks really good doing it

interesting point

i still think mvp = dirk, if not bron bron

bron is so much better than everyone, its boring, w/e i kind of feel like all the nba awards are so constantly unjustly distributed they should just do away w/them

true for every sport?

yeah prob i dont follow the other sports closely enough to make an accurate comparison tho

well it feels like there's far less inconsistency year-to-year for individual bball players than like baseball or football. once you hit your peak production, you can spend several years there as long as you put in the work.