your terrible ideas

car doors that don't fully close so you can never slam your fingers in them

it CAN be true about celery depending on your metabolism. also: grapefruit.

ok so this is a terrible idea that I think I may see yet in my lifetime

"legal limit" soda. the sugariest soda allowed by legal law. the whole selling point is that if you bought it, opened it, and added a packet of sugar, well boy, you'd better hope there aren't any cops around because buddy you could be arrested!

I'd have to look into FDA regs, though.

a song about sacco and vanzetti to the tune of 'viva las vegas'

is there really a legal limit for sugar in a soda?

just sell some sugar packaged in soda cans

or drink 2 sodas

"just add seltzer water"

I dunno if there's a legal limit to sugar in sodas. if there is, then I would change the idea to something like "Impossibly Sweet Soda!"

the hook would be that this is the most sugar available in a soda according to scientific law - even if you tried to add more sugar to it, it wouldn't work, the sugar would just fall to the bottom, undissolved.

drinking it would be like drinking that $20 slushee bart bought from the kwik-e-mart.

Wouldn't this be just a jar of HFCS in the US? Or a squeezy bottle of Golden Syrup in the UK?

232 page book called 'Why England Lose'

all pages blank, except for 191 which says

lol

Website: www.grouporn.com which somehow involves group coupons for porn. Haven't quite worked it out yet.

group ORN - canadian logistics and services conglomerate with suspiciously high web traffic

232 page book called 'Why England Lose'

all pages blank, except for 191 which says

lol

― salvia divanorum (nakhchivan), Wednesday, 15 December 2010 20:14 (2 hours ago)

am srsly wondering whether the bleep in The Boredoms' TV Ramones comes at a proportionally similar point in the track. going to the bother of finding out would be a terrible idea but I am going to do it anyway

nah fuck it, this ain't getting resolved today

damn lj yr building up some mythos abt my allusive genius or some shit, setting yrself up for a fall ;_;

still, time spent w/ the boredoms is seldom wasted

haha this wasn't yr allusive genius for once, I'm all about the holistic synchronicity thing since our simultaneous maneouvre on that craven bastard Olley

the boredoms are one of the best of bands

an evening with the boredoms - entry in a vbb forum's parody cd covers thread -- receives three lmao emoticons but ultimately is ignored cuz ppl there prefer evanescence

Wurzels/xtian-emo crossover act Devonescence

sans of iyo jim a - show in which the late james angleton was asked about his favourite fonts

a mashup of Reasons To Be Cheerful (list of good things) and The Message (list of bad things)

A fridge magnet in the shape of the monolith from '2001'.

guess u could find one on ebay

sans of iyo jim a - show in which the late james angleton was asked about his favourite fonts

― nax arrrrrgh (nakhchivan), Thursday, 16 December 2010 23:16 (Yesterday)

just giggled like a loon iirc

I came really close to once thinking I could glue tiny magnets to the inside of bottle caps and sell them for a profit.

http://www.google.com/search?q=bottle+cap+magnets&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a#q=bottle+cap+magnets&hl=en&safe=off&client=firefox-a&hs=aWK&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&prmd=ivns&source=univ&tbs=shop:1&tbo=u&ei=RaILTYeNIpGmsQPAzrXRCg&sa=X&oi=product_result_group&ct=title&resnum=10&ved=0CGoQrQQwCQ&biw=1366&bih=601&fp=9bef8cda26d1a6ec

Yeah, it's just one idea that will never happen I guess.

death metal patter song

poopcorn

i am crying right now

hip-hop album trilogy called "Rapper Run"/"Rapper is Rich"/"Rapper at Rest"

xxp would stink out your microwave and kitchen even more than regular popcorn.

Lúcio Starts Fires - The erstwhile Brazil centre-half stars in a Chapman Brothers video installation nasty in which he burns down a lifesize replica of a Barrat Homes 3 bedroom semi - constructed entirely from slabs of frozen petrol and filled with six hundred live cane rats and £800,000 of Louis XIV furniture from the estate of Heinrich Himmler

^^^ still won't win the Turner Prize, as it's not 'edgy' enough.

it seems like they prefer more minimalist stuff?

chapmans dgaf about those fucks

Spectres of Markers - Limited ed coffee table book of Jeff Tweedy youtube stills

haha how are u still posting to 1p3

i have been thinking about a salad/toast restaurant for a long time. all we serve is salad and toast. because i like to eat that and would go to salad&toast for lunch.

http://i53.tinypic.com/2wce2kk.jpg

salad & toast for lunch is sub- prison food as far as my tastes go, unless there are copious dressings (the healthy kind) and jellies. I'd definitely go to Dressings&Jellies for lunch.

there are dressings and it's not just boring lettuce salad. no jelly though.

no cookie salad either

well thank god for that!

actually if you threw in stuff like spinach and arugula and mushrooms and dried cranberries and chopped walnuts, I could probably appreciate the salad without any dressing. iceberg lettuce is a definite deal breaker & it's probably the reason why I have an irrational knee-jerk reaction against the word salad.

http://i52.tinypic.com/2u9mr1v.jpg

http://i51.tinypic.com/119vuk8.jpg

my idea tonight is a talking plastic figurine like Homer up there. it features a crabby old lady (possibly Maxine: see above) who sits in a recliner while her dog lies asleep in a little bed in front of the chair. the dog is wearing a cone-shaped elizabethan collar, and one of its hind legs is bandaged. when you press a button, the lady sits upright, stares her dog down, and screams, "DON'T PICK AT IT!" in an earsplitting crabby old lady voice. the dog opens one eye and whines meekly, as if to say, "b-b-but I wasn't picking at it, mommy." the sequence repeats until the batteries run out, with roughly a 2-second interval between "DON'T PICK AT IT!"s.

alternate idea: same as above, but instead of a crabby old lady, it's a balding middle-aged man who mumbles "don't scootch" at the dog in a barely audible monotone. in this case the dog is actually scooting its butt across the carpet, and it doesn't acknowledge its owner's command.

salad + toast = caesar salad

am srsly wondering whether the bleep in The Boredoms' TV Ramones comes at a proportionally similar point in the track. going to the bother of finding out would be a terrible idea but I am going to do it anyway

― schlomo replay (acoleuthic), Wednesday, December 15, 2010 11:15 PM (2 weeks ago)

I'm still waiting with 'bated breath for the results of this study.

Porno version of The King's Speech called The King's Sex, where the King works with a hot female therapist to get over his fear of sex.