Conservapedia - An encyclopedia you can trust

Biblical scientific foreknowledge is how the Bible shows a comprehension of scientific knowledge far ahead of its time. Biblical scientific foreknowledge illustrates what is possible.

Atheists, particularly evolutionists, engage in liberal denial about how the Bible was correct long before science could discover the same truths. Their closed-mindedness against the Bible obstructs the advancement of science.

Biblical scientific foreknowledge also facilitates improvements in the translation of verses that describe scientific-related events, such as Jesus's Calming the Storm.

scientific-related events

Events that take place in a space-time continuum?

their hatred of college professors is truly frightening and irrational, as is the world of fantasy that these people choose to live in. i remember an article on conservapedia that had a list of crimes committed by college professors, as though therefore all college professors commit crimes. the utter stupidity of these people could give me a panic attack.

http://www.conservapedia.com/Atheism_and_obesity

Chuck Norris endorses the Total Gym exercise system.[37]

For example, the noted Evangelical preacher Rick Warren recently made a public commitment to lose 90 pounds.[24] Have you seen any of the prominent atheists make such a pledge?

convincing argument

Pictured: The svelte Jerry Falwell

http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20071119121356/uncyclopedia/images/thumb/9/99/Jerry_falwell1.jpg/200px-Jerry_falwell1.jpg

http://www.conservapedia.com/Essay:_Slim_atheists'_convention

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what have i done to deserve this conservapedia banishment

in my limited experience (growing up in a uber-conservative church), most religious people would refrain from smoking, drinking, and drug abuse, but they would certainly NOT refrain from eating heaps of fatty, unhealthy foods. gluttony seemed to be the one allowed vice.

you'd have a sermon about YOUR BODY IS THE TEMPLE OF CHRIST then before the service would let out the pastor would go on some lengthy food porn rant about what his wife is cooking for dinner. weird folks.

While many Western atheists are non-religious, not all non-religious people are atheists.

Had too hard a time getting my head round this sentence to move on the rest of the article, TBH.

Madalyn Murray O'Hair was the founder of the American Atheists organization and she was overweight

Hahaha, thesis proven, job done.

Rush is an atheist icon?

As we predicted, the Democrats pick Charlotte, North Carolina for their 2012 national convention, rather than St. Louis, Missouri. [15] Translation: Missouri has wised up against liberals and they do not have a chance there anymore.

true lols for this one

Chuck Norris adds (apropos to nothing)
What's preposterous is that atheists are now advertising and soliciting on websites particularly created for teens.

http://www.conservapedia.com/PZ_Myers#The_claim_that_PZ_Myers.27_blog_audience_tends_to_be_quarrelsome_and_socially_challenged_men

The historical militancy of the atheist/evolutionist community

LOL

Glass houses?

laughed out loud at the length discrepancy between this and this

Many women begin regretting their abortion before they even leave the abortion clinic. In some cases, women begin regretting their abortion just before it is performed,[14] but are told by abortionists that it is too late to change their mind because they already signed a consent form (which is a lie - it is never too late to withdraw consent for an abortion).

What are there views on when it's ok to withdraw consent for sex?

fuck: there/their

i don't know because the single thing in their entry for "rape" is a list of "most rapes by country".

in love with the attempted jujitsu here:

However, Charles Darwin originally based the idea of human evolution on a racist assumption[2], [after God was rejected as Creator], made in the late 1830s[3], that Fuegians (natives of Tierra del Fuego) resembled primates that he had observed in the London zoo.

http://www.conservapedia.com/Liberal_Inability_To_Abstract

this is some heady stuff

Christianity introduced the concept of eternity, whereby time has no meaning and either stops or does not exist.

o rly

Time is a valuable resource, and each person has the responsibility not to squander the gift of time by engaging in unproductive activities such as watching television, senseless bickering or frequenting worthless websites on the internet

so long guys, i'm outta here

Evil tends to focus on brief periods of time, as in 9/11, while good tends to last longer, as in the Resurrection.

lol

http://www.conservapedia.com/Essay:_Ponies_vs._atheism_-_Ponies_win

3 things many women don't like

Spiders, snakes and atheism! [4][5] [6][7] Most women do not like atheism.[8][9][10] Like the serpent in the Garden of Eden, atheists are often deceptive (Please see atheism and deception).

3 things many women love

1. Jesus
2. Many American women love their kind and generous God fearing husbands who tend to give more to charity than the typical American atheist.[11]
3. God's creation the pony[12]

Another reason why most women and girls love ponies and dislike atheism

Unlike many Western World atheists, most ponies are not obese! Please see atheism and obesity

The graceful beauty of horses, like the autumn foliage, cannot be adequately explained by atheism or evolution in terms of its origin.[18][19]

kind of tempting to derail thread w/ pictures of obese ponies

I really have to read some of those conservapedia entries a LONG time to figure out whether they are satire or not.

OMG, some of this is genius:

Ponies are often a lot faster and nicer than the overweight atheist PZ Myers. If a vote were held by women on whether they liked ponies or the atheist PZ Myers better, we both know who would win, don't we? Please see: Atheism and obesity and Views on Atheists.

The brutal proponent of atheism Joseph Stalin was not a big fan of ponies.

Chairman Mao Zedong, the harsh dictator of Chinese atheistic communism, loved horses. Unfortunately, he loved horses as an appetizer for his big meals. Please see: Atheism and obesity

who will troll the trolls

http://www.thelwell.org.uk/images/ponies/images/Ponies8.jpg

that is more than i have seen written about nice little girls who love ponies, in one place, ever

Pretty sure Andy Schlafly has a horse/little girl fetish

http://www.conservapedia.com/Best_New_Conservative_Words

Was not aware 'apple pie' was a conservative term.

Seems more like something an obese pony-hating liberal would be into.

word poverty 2001 popularized by President George W. Bush

The guys at Rationalwiki have a bit of fun tracking these guys:

http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Conservapedia:What_is_going_on_at_CP%3F

and also:

http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Conservapedia:Best_of_Conservapedia

http://www.conservapedia.com/Liberal_style

Liberal style also includes these additional characteristics:

10. respond with "sigh" when presented with repeated examples of harm caused by liberal culture, yet persist in denying the harm despite overwhelming evidence

20. attempting to appear smarter than others, when often the opposite is true

21. attempting to appear more reasonable than others, when often the opposite is true

48. Denying something widely known to be true but difficult to prove, such as observing that men are far more likely to work in gas stations than women.

54. inability or unwillingness to differentiate between genuine conservative arguments and parodies of conservative arguments.

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what have i done to deserve this conservapedia banishment

― hoisin crispy mubaduck (ledge), Friday, 4 February 2011 00:09 Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

They know you're a skinny atheist!

I'm getting the same message - maybe they've blocked the UK?

20. attempting to appear smarter than others, when often the opposite is true

probably seems like the go-to choice for ILE board description but

I Love Everything: observing that men are far more likely to work in gas stations than women

is the connoisseur's choice

I'm getting the same message - maybe they've blocked the UK?

nah it works at work, only blocked at home.

from http://www.conservapedia.com/Best_New_Conservative_Words :
action-at-a-distance
Newton's acceptance of this concept -- which became fundamental to electrostatics and quantum mechanics and has a basis in Christianity[2] -- was central to the development of his theory of gravity.[3] Einstein criticized this concept as "spooky".

this is amazing. it's completely irrelevant to conservatism; the shoehorning in of jebus is classic and hilarious; they have no idea what einstein was talking about; and if you follow footnote 3 you find that newton explicity rejected action at a distance:

in a letter to Bentley from 1693, we find the following stark rejection of action at a distance, one that may be Newton's most famous pronouncement on the subject

Conservative Michele Bachmann looks to move higher from #6 in ranking of likelihood to win the presidency in 2012 with a strong showing in Saturday's annual straw poll at CPAC. [10]

More conservative country music smacks down doofus rapper Eminem at the Grammys. [5] Is Eminem too dumb for even liberals?