Game Dev Story: how to succeed on the App Store without even bothering to resize the graphics

Skiddy Wool sounds more like a longjohns simulator

Orrite your tips have convinced me to try again. Started from scratch with Perineophiliac Studios.

Nope. Up Hilary Duff didn't make enough money, HI DERE was pulled off the market before I was ready to stop selling it, and now I have an Exodus licence and no cash to develop a game for it. Baleeted.

Now that's more like it!!

Top Sellers:
Greek Ladyboy 4: 24.48 million units
Cow Farts 2: 16 million
Artery Ninja 2: 16 million
Booty Quest: 14.7 million
Flyin' Dragboy 2: 13.7 million

Codeo Labs' "Coccyx" is a revolutionary 64-bit BD-ROM.

Codeo has 27 hall of fame games and a 18% market share. 180 million units total

Monkey Island creator Ron Gilbert talks about Game Dev Story

"And of course, it's unrealistic to think that a company would release a game without fixing all of its bugs," Gilbert added. "That would never happen."
har har Doesn't FALLOUT: NEW VEGAS deserve its own thread? har

this game plateaus so hard. once you do okay once, it's easy peasy street and there's nothing new for you to do or new challenges to face. kinda lame.

I am definitely finished with it but I still enjoyed the journey.

Yeah, for a game that cost about as much as a pint of beer, I got my money's worth.

me too, i just wish it went somewhere and got different u know?

otm about the plateuing, the only replay valu I got was I realised I'd been doing it rong a lot the first go-round so when I hit 20 years I started again (you bring over your levelled up genres) and this time round it is a lot easier.

Still, it idles time at the train station and whatnot.

dont miss your train!!

I hear rumours about NEW SECRET CONSOLES if you play past 50 or 75 years or something, is it true?

If nothing else, I am looking for whatever next Kairosoft put out. Also, I really dig the 16-bit pixel art design.

Dunno about secret consoles, but you get extra console design options if you have 4 Hardware Engs in your team (and another with 6). And there are a few hidden characters - Kairobot joined Herpes Enclave for the home stretch (still had to go through his agent & pay him to appear at GameDex, swiz).

everyone otm about plateauing - there's no risk after one or two hall-of-famers. There's stuff to do - 40/40, a 60+ million seller, levelling characters, multiple game of the years - but you likely won't go out of business.

yasssssssss
http://www.appbrain.com/app/game-dev-story/net.kairosoft.android.gamedev3en

lol android

:( truth bomb

just don't think the public were ready for sexy golf 2

cunt puncher studios resumé to date

quim story 35,335
quim-to-mania 55,724
finger fantasy 118,945
killathon 95,240 (innovative "marathon"/shooter crossover again not sure the public were ready for my vision)
sexy golf 69,308
sexy golf 2 50,998

I'm always excited when a new quim game is released.

if you're as entertained as I am by giving profane, offensive, obscene or ridiculous titles to mundane objects, it's a godsend. this is basically a little bit of game holding a mechanic together which allows me to make myself laugh with my tourettey jokes- without alienating my loved ones by telling them something objectively unfunny that i can't get out from laughter

Yes - this thing functions as like a surrogate girlfriend to me, in that it provides a means for me to make unacceptably shit, offensive jokes without needing to have a "woman" there that I'm all "in a comfort zone" with to the point where I have "no filter".

I paid $800k getting a renowned children's artist in to devise an art style for my romance simulator. I then titled it "Shrub Rapist". It shifted 4.9 million units. This game is Japanese, right?

The 14 character limit is kind of a drag though, if there was a bigger limit you could get cracking mileage out of making up lots of pretentious modern game names with colons in them, instead of not even being able to fit the "2" in when you make a cash-in straight-to-DS shovelware sequel.

Yes - this thing functions as like a surrogate girlfriend to me, in that it provides a means for me to make unacceptably shit, offensive jokes without needing to have a "woman" there that I'm all "in a comfort zone" with to the point where I have "no filter".

I don't mean to imply here that I've been playing this for longer than a day, or that I will still be playing it on Wednesday.

of sexy golf 2, the critics remarked "cash-in straight-to-DS shovelware sequel"

I wonder if some generous spirited Brit tinkerer could pull this apart and edit it so that the Famitsu Death Panel is replaced by injoke spouting 80s Spectrum/C64 magazine subhumans? It'd be kind of apposite; I kept getting grandiose visions of the games I was spending thousands on, then realising that I was putting them out on the game's euphemised equivalent of the c.1987 Brick Gameboy.

While they were at it, they could also add "impenetrable text-based football management", "shit naked poker" and "politically incorrect Native American rape simulator" to the available genres.

Just thinking aloud. In text.

maybe save the rape jokes for the game?

Sorry, that was an oblique, disapproving reference to Custer's Revenge. It was a different time.

Custer's Revenge is really something.

sexy golf 3 feat. lake balls

New studio Thrush Cream just doesn't have the same traction as Herpes Enclave. Fantasy MMORPG World of Sperm (& sequel World of Sper2) aren't even hitting 20 mil, the Bumming Puppy animal life games are our best sellers, but still only so-so (tho' one got game of the year). Some of it's bad luck with power cuts, but I think Fran Bloom has a lot to answer for. Totally unreliable. 'I worked really hard on that'. No you didn't. You're capable of 100+ scenario work; regular mid-30s hackwork is just lazy. Thank god for Mr X. He's a trooper.

Maybe I'll just become a mini-skirt trivia shovelware studio.

whats up with mr. x and the king? do they level up hardcore or what? they always look like ass to me.

Mr X never gets huge numbers (300ish range), but he seems to be really reliable: the hackers with mad stats (some 900+ if you level them in everything) are a bit flaky, and knock out too many 'that'll do' efforts for proposals/sound/graphics to be really trustworthy. But apparently if trained in the right direction, they become more reliable? Might be true - Dexter seems to perform solidly as a sound eng, but Fran has screwed me over as a writer, designer and director before now (but her stats so good I don't dare sack her, even though I think the Chimp and Bear might be brilliant).

just cracked a 10-9-10-10 for my pirate mmo booty world 3. sup now.

dude, if i paid you 2.4 mil you don't get to say "i don't know if i'll do well this time"
in good news, the Toot Toot harbor motion franchise is in definite bloom

Im starting to enjoy this game less, mostly because my staff is being a bunch of cunts and I cant come up with funny titles anymore.

it's definitely a game where you burn out quickly but those 10 or so hours where the game has its hooks in you are a magical blur of whimsy and profanity

Exactly.

somebody's angling for C+P quotation

only in every post I make on this board

I keep playing this on the train and I dont even know why anymore.

I keep playing this on the train and I dont even know why anymore.

^^^ new board descript

I keep playing this on the train and I dont even know why anymore.

Really. Dutiful, flat & laboured swearing ('Pong Twat, I'll just call it Pong Twat'), being repeatedly let down by hackers and contractors, comfortable progression into 20-30 million sellers, 37/40 over and over. What am I aiming for? Nothing.

('Pong Twat, I'll just call it Pong Twat')

Hahahahahahahahaha!

Exactly. I think I hit that stage about a day before I finally quit for good.

Kairosoft's new game, wherein you manage a volcanic springs spa(onsen), is slightly more Japanese:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MWh_I3eI2Kc

It appears that the CEO and exec asst from GDS have parlayed their millions from the "CuntFarter" and "Womb Maider" series into a new venture.

I wanna play that. :/

http://toucharcade.com/2010/11/30/game-dev-story-2-coming-to-ios/

http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2011-01-04-game-dev-story-companion-out-in-japan

http://toucharcade.com/2011/02/28/kairosoft-launches-hot-springs-story/

Neat game! Much more to unlock.

9pm: Hmm, I don't like this game as much as the other one.

...

2am: Uggggghhhhhhh fuck my liiiiife.