Tragic Football Stories - Let us Kick Around the misshapen Jabulani that is English football right here

@kevindaviesbwfc
Kevin Davies
Not in the England squad time for a beer!!!
19 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone

for crouch to be in there ahead of him is shite, but then i dont get that squad tbh

Smalling, though?

nah, not up front

Smalling over Jones is the most hilarious part imo.

Just turned on ESPN to find Germany Under 21's 2-0 up on England. England appear to have Henri Lansbury in goal! Isn't he one of yours a hoy hoy and James M? Also isn't he a left winger! lol

They're showing Argentina vs. Brasil tmrw btw.

He... doesn't really have a position. And when I say that I mean like James Milner, not like 'he can be a goalie'. wtf.

goalie sent off in that game fyi

He's like a new signing. LANSbury.

not like 'he can be a goalie'. wtf.

Also, this is Arsenal. Anybody can be a goalie at Arsenal.

haha

true true

can totally see that- arsene only ever scouts wingers, and the slower they progress they further back the pitch they land from 15, 16, 17 onwards

haha

arsene only scouts deep lying playmakers

England looking awfully scrappy.

Carroll's playing, then?

Stream went down and I missed the goal. What happened?

Yeh, Carrol's upfront, pretty ineffective so far.

GOAL! England 0-1 France (Benzema 16') That's a lovely goal, as the England players could tell you, given that they stood idly by and watched it.

It was a one-two between Malouda and Benzema on the edge the box which ended up with Benzema beating Foster rather easily at his near post. England are being schooled at the moment.

Carroll's done enough in the last five minutes to suggest that this is how England are going to play from now on.

i.e. won three or four headers from longish punts

it does a lot more for the team in terms of keeping opposition pushed back and wary than just that tbf. wish spurs had the option.

Yeah I know, but it's still not going to win things. I'm on his side, he's a potentially amazing player, not exactly Ronaldoesque but maybe the closest we're likely to see. It's not going to work out that way of course.

ha i'm a fan but he's maybe fabiano-esque if we're making unlikely potential-fulfilling comparisons

BALE IN.

bailout

wot no ilxors anywhere discussing last nights, ahem, performance?

Think they're all over on the international football friendlies thread which hasn't been moved over here yet (hi dere plz a real mod who can move stuff?)

hi dere no longer a real mod ;_;

there isn't actually anything to discuss btw

not from last night.

capello needs to start picking players on their last league game and nothing more. that's only as good as you are anyway iirc

Can't tell what's a challop and what isn't any more.

pretty sure capello's squad was actually a challop.

downing should have started left side for england, based on nothing but his performance against utd. i'm not really invested in chasing the rest of it tbh.

Sadly, I felt last night more or less vindicated Capello's sticking with the old guard in the summer.

Downing is a better option than most of the other England left midfielders on any given, I think. The rest of it doesn't bear much chasing tbh.

last night vindicated jack wilshere

I am sorry to say

also it vindicated paul scholes

nothing retroactively vindicates abject failure. if you don't bring form to the world cup then you've bottled it.

Didn't watch the game cos fuck a friendly, also we were out, but that was a grab-bag team and I don't think you could draw many long-term conclusions from any performance it made.

drawing conclusions from him picking a grab-bag team. not much else to take from t, really, as i said.

I saw the first 15 minutes then fucked off to cricket training, saw enough tho :D

You don't get the feeling that there is a plan any more, tbh.

Maybe wheels are turning under the surface but after all the soul-searching and the convincing critiques of English football during the World Cup, the FA looks ever so much like it's masterplan is: do fuck all about the infrastructure but appoint an English guy next go round.

really.

he didn't have a stream of players ready and waiting to go?

it's a bit of a kneejerk, but genuinely- what do these guys do all day.

i'm neither english nor a football manager, but i could fill napkins with possible 1st, 2nd, 3rd choice X's, up-and-coming give em a game in the cup XI's, left footed XI's, sex scandal XI's, you name it XI's.

nobody picks teams with any gusto anymore, all managers act like it's a nuisance. it's sad.

I honestly would love to know how Capello fills his days

This is England. This is their thing.

For as long as I've followed football, England have always been technically inferior, tactically inept and, seemingly, mentally fragile under the pressure of playing competent teams. Their entire 'gameplan' has always been based around a desperate, straw-clutching hope that one of their handful (being generous) of players that isn't utterly embarrassed by the ball will somehow pull a rabbit out of his arse and compensate for the pitiful inadequacy of the rest of the team. And thus we - as supporters, fans, bemused observers - end up pinning all our expectations on one poor sod to carry the country to glory (or not); casting him in the role of ephemeral demigod or abject scapegoat as and when results suit.

Aside from one fleeting summer under Terry Venables and the odd game under Hoddle (or perhaps karma should get the credit), I honestly don't recall England ever playing like a team. Not in the last 20 years anyway. They've always been about over-rated individuals dragging along mediocre-to-abysmal individuals - all within a structure of tactical chaos, indiscipline and self-importance.

NV will no doubt agree with this F365 mailbox dude. I know Capello's not got much to work with, but that's no excuse not to work with what he has got- plenty of good young players available, starts with gerrard and barry- not only two of the guys that stank the place out in the summer, but two guys that, let's be honest, have been pretty shit since then too. a few friendlies that feature all-new lineups or at least all u-28 players might send a good message- england b teams, but without the sting that the 'b' suggests

good to see lescott in there tho. dont care what moyes or mancini think, that guy is international class

with the likes of Johnson, Wilshere, Gibbs, Rodwell, Carroll and Walcott (sometimes) looking like good players, I think we'll be okay in 3-4 years' time. We'll just have to put up with Barry/Lampard/Ferdinand/Terry/Gerrard for a couple more years.

Mark, Windsor

mark, windsor, is completely fucking deluded. england have nobody coming up to replace the talents of gerrard, ferdinand or lampard.

i have no idea how that tallies with my other statements in this thread, i'm just saying what i'm FEELING

gerrard is a fucking hex over this england team, no matter how well he plays, and we will be grateful to be rid of him

make mark e smith national manager imo