Is it bad for a baby to see you masturbating?

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

Not all messages are displayed: show all messages (362 of them)

or not.

― grimly fiendish (grimlord), Monday, 5 December 2005 22:16 (eighteen years ago) link

In my experience dinner cloths are less likely to be used when people have underwear, t-shirts, perfectly good dress shirts, etc to use.

― Allyzay must fight Zolton herself. (allyzay), Monday, 5 December 2005 22:27 (eighteen years ago) link

fuck off, weirdo

― gear (gear), Monday, 5 December 2005 23:28 (eighteen years ago) link

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxposts

― gear (gear), Monday, 5 December 2005 23:29 (eighteen years ago) link

ha ha, you should've just left it.

― Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Monday, 5 December 2005 23:34 (eighteen years ago) link

Yikes! This thread is crazy. I've never even been able to masturbate in the same room with a cat or a dog in it (just in case reincarnation turned out to be true and the cat or dog turned out to be my grandma).

― scott seward (scott seward), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 00:07 (eighteen years ago) link

I swear our goldfish used to make the weirdest clicking noises against the side of his bowl when I was engaged in self-love. But that was a fucking goldfish.

― Amity Wong (noodle vague), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 00:09 (eighteen years ago) link

doesn't howard stern's book start off with a guy jacking into a glove?

― AaronK (AaronK), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 00:11 (eighteen years ago) link

xpost as opposed to the normal, non-fucking kind.

― AaronK (AaronK), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 00:11 (eighteen years ago) link

ARRON-DAN MIND MELD

― Dan (Ha Ha) Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 00:12 (eighteen years ago) link

Goldfish don't fuck as such, do they? They just kind of jizz all round the bowl.

― Amity Wong (noodle vague), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 00:13 (eighteen years ago) link

So the final takeawy from this thread is don't leave your goldfish in the same room as a baby.

― Dan (Piscene Jizz Explosion) Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 00:16 (eighteen years ago) link

yes, I think we can all agree, that would just be gross.

― AaronK (AaronK), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 03:47 (eighteen years ago) link

Tuomas has got everybody riled up on this thread. Y'all all be suckas. He's the same guy what says it's cool to hang out naked with your parent of the opposite sex. Natch it's all good with a baby.

What's the deal with Americans and nudity? [WORK-SAFE AGANE HURRAH]

Is it really true that many Americans have never seen their parents/siblings/firends naked?

― BenDover, Tuesday, 6 December 2005 04:00 (eighteen years ago) link

I just read through this thread and I haven't felt this queasy since I sat through Screwballs.

― 'Twan (miccio), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 04:00 (eighteen years ago) link

but these are questions that have to be asked.

― latebloomer: The Corridor (Yes, The Corridor) (latebloomer), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 04:07 (eighteen years ago) link

WHY IS THIS THREAD STILL GOING

― dabnis coleman's ghost (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 04:11 (eighteen years ago) link

x-post

perhaps not by mentally sound adult human beings, but someone has to tackle them.

― latebloomer: The Corridor (Yes, The Corridor) (latebloomer), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 04:12 (eighteen years ago) link

i even think tuomas has a vague point on that other thread (vis a vis blah blah not all nudity = sexuality blah blah) but JESUS H PEOPLE

― dabnis coleman's ghost (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 04:13 (eighteen years ago) link

that's the thing - not all nudity is sex, obviously. ALL JACKING OFF IS, THOUGH.

― Banana Nutrament (ghostface), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 04:22 (eighteen years ago) link

anyone who can maintain an erection in that situation should be congratulated for completely abandoning any pretense to shared human morality. you might as well have just eaten the baby and been done with it.

― dabnis coleman's ghost (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 04:25 (eighteen years ago) link

did somebody bring up the end of Flirting With Disaster yet?

― 'Twan (miccio), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 04:30 (eighteen years ago) link

ts: a dog watching you have sex vs. a cat watching you have sex

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 04:40 (eighteen years ago) link

i think families that had to live in the same room - and there are many, many places like this today, just not so much in the US - became either kind of fucked up or developed strict "moral" (i.e. "ewwwww!!!") rules to deal with the overbubbling of their dark materials, both minuses, really

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 04:43 (eighteen years ago) link

"if you really want to see an open-minded society, you ought to consider the russian tenement blocks of 1920s lower-east side new york"

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 04:45 (eighteen years ago) link

odd, and weird, and creepy = your conscience giving you a hint about morality, maybe?

― A Nairn (moretap), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 05:24 (eighteen years ago) link

nope.

― AaronK (AaronK), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 05:27 (eighteen years ago) link

that's just social conditioning talking.

― A Nairn (moretap), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 05:27 (eighteen years ago) link

yup.

― AaronK (AaronK), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 05:28 (eighteen years ago) link

exactly.

― AaronK (AaronK), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 05:28 (eighteen years ago) link

HEY SMART PEOPLE!
MASTURBATING WITH A BABY IN THE ROOM WILL STILL BE GROSS AND WRONG NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU FUCKING MICROANALYZE IT!
THE HISTORICAL RECORD OF WHOLE FAMILIES SHARING ONE- OR TWO-ROOM DWELLINGS CAN FUCK OFF!

-- M@tt He1geson (matt@game[remove]informer.com), December 5th, 2005.

OTM x 1,000,000,000

― Theorry Henry (Enrique), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 09:31 (eighteen years ago) link

welcome to the modern world.

― AaronK (AaronK), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 13:45 (eighteen years ago) link

modern world is rubbish

― ken c (ken c), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 13:47 (eighteen years ago) link

http://www.funjunkie.co.uk/images/capwank1.jpg

― aldo_cowpat (aldo_cowpat), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 14:53 (eighteen years ago) link

everyone is overstating everything. TO THE POWER OF TEN ZILLION!

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 14:56 (eighteen years ago) link

http://www.dur.ac.uk/z.a.craven/breadcrumbs/hongkong/wanko.jpg

― ken c (ken c), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 15:00 (eighteen years ago) link

"wanko" means puppy in Japanese.

― Super Cub (Debito), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 15:29 (eighteen years ago) link

shame it doesn't mean baby

― ken c (ken c), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 15:34 (eighteen years ago) link

Maybe logged way the fuck out was just offering to show the baby some puppies.

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 15:36 (eighteen years ago) link

The youngsters older Athenian men had sex with had reached puberty, I think, they were probably older than 12.

They were usually about sixteen or a little older--the original point was to take a young man who had just graduated from school and give him a little more guidence, education, and non-reproductive sex before he was let out on the big bad world.

BTW, if you think masturbating in front of a baby is creepy, just think about the old practice of masturbating a baby to stop them from crying.

― Christine 'Green Leafy Dragon' Indigo (cindigo), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 16:58 (eighteen years ago) link

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 16:59 (eighteen years ago) link

OK THIS THREAD.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 17:00 (eighteen years ago) link

It's just part of life:

Why it happens

Toddlers masturbate for the same reason that older children do: It feels good! Bodily exploration is part of growing up. During the toddler years, your child will learn to run, jump, throw, pump a swing, draw, and (probably) "make all her poops in the potty." She may be just as curious about her genitals as she is about her fingers, toes, and belly button — and if she's recently switched from diapers to underpants, she may be able to get to them for the first time. "When parents first see this kind of exploration, they wonder 'is this normal?'" says Meg Zweiback, a nurse practitioner and family consultant in Oakland, California. "The answer is yes, you don't need to be concerned."

What to do

Don't panic. Not everyone does it, but masturbation is a completely normal thing to do. It doesn't cause any physical ills, pose any health risks, and no, it won't turn your child into a sex maniac, either. Masturbation in toddlers isn't sexual (as it is for adults) because toddlers don't know what sex is.. And while in older children explicit sex play is often a tip-off to sexual abuse or exposure to inappropriately explicit sexual material, this is extremely unlikely to be the case with toddlers, who don't have the imaginative skills for this kind of role adoption. (A toddler who's been sexually abused is more likely to become withdrawn or suddenly have trouble sleeping.) That said, toddlers masturbate because it feels good, and the good feelings can be as pleasurable for her as they are for adults. "A toddler may masturbate herself to orgasm," says Zweiback "complete with panting, red face, and a big sigh at the end. But it's absolutely not something to be worried about."

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 17:02 (eighteen years ago) link

So, if the baby's doing it, does that make it OK for anyone else in the room to do it too?

― James Ward (jamesmichaelward), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 17:07 (eighteen years ago) link

I suppose you have to ask around.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 17:41 (eighteen years ago) link

"A toddler may masturbate herself to orgasm," says Zweiback "complete with panting, red face, and a big sigh at the end.

TMI, Baby Doc!

― Erick Dampier is better than Shaq (miloaukerman), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 18:37 (eighteen years ago) link

― Super Cub (Debito), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 18:41 (eighteen years ago) link

what about a cigarette?

― AaronK (AaronK), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 19:49 (eighteen years ago) link

http://www.zahn-art.at/images/baby-smile.jpg

― Erick Dampier is better than Shaq (miloaukerman), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 19:52 (eighteen years ago) link

http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/6/60/250px-MICHAEL_JACKSON_Bad-Front.JPG

― Dan (Shamon) Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 19:57 (eighteen years ago) link

Skipping 262 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.