Tragic Football Stories - Let us Kick Around the misshapen Jabulani that is English football right here

MARADONA for VILLA you know it makes SENSE

england needs gazza.

he's the only person who recognises the england players the way they truly are.

good people. who have done very bad things.

england with gazza mnanager- joey barton gets a call up

'yo joey, it's gazza'

"I've got a dressing gown and a box of chicken"

o_O

Not familiar with the Gazza/Moaty connection, LJ?

nono I am o_Oing at yet another player pull-out and a dude called Frank Fielding being in the squad

Foster is just straight "ooh I'm injured" 3 days before a League fixture shenanigans I think. Wes Brown retiring from international football is about on a level with me retiring from international football.

whatever happened to lee camp

Summer season supporting Bernie Clifton at Skegness Futurist Theatre iirc

I tell you when I know Scotland was in trouble: on 1st June 1997, I sat down to watch highlights of a friendly between Scotland and Malta, and soon realised there was a player wearing a Scotland shirt who I had never heard of before - that man was David Hopkin

― I am utterly and abjectly pissed off with this little lot (Tom D.), Tuesday, June 29, 2010 11:53 AM (1 month ago)

I've sat down to watch a Charlton match and not heard of our striker once - that man was David Mooney - and yeah, trouble loomed

Yeah, I have no idea who either of England's reserve keepers are now. can't remember the last time I hadn't actually *heard* of a Scotland player, but I don't think I could pick, say, Scott Robertson out of a lineup.

when yer reduced to calling up some guy you just made up you know that the darkness has truly fallen and you may as well get it over with and try to Anglify Almunia.

I was just checking that Scott Carson and Chris Kirkland are still alive, and it turns out that they are, though they aren't feeling too good right now.

Anyone watch it?

talk was in the euro thread dude

doh, sorry.

wasn't much of it.

feelin for dawson tbh, tho it's probably truer to say he overperformed last season than to claim he's international quality.

ashley young looked lively but didn't really beat his man, disappointing enough for all teh good reviews this mornin.

Capello half out - next boss to be an Englishman

Have any of these fuckers ever put together a coherent argument as to what the advantage is of having an English manager, or do their eyes just mist over and they start singing "Theme from Carling Black Label" and flexing their bulldog tattoos?

I kind of see the logic behind wanting the national team to be a reflection of the best players, manager and coaches that England has to offer, but that doesn't seem to be the reasoning behind this statement.

The FA always just bows to any kind of pressure, whatever it happens to be at the time in question. I doubt there's any kind of strategic thought going on, but if there is it'll be something like "hopefully this'll keep the redknapps off our backs for a while"

For some dudes running a business worth billions or something, they sure do spend a lot of time listening to what the gutter press tells them to do.

'To be honest, I watched in the first game and we got a free-kick just inside our half. John Terry knocked it long for Emile Heskey into the box and I was thinking: "You wouldn't have done that for Chelsea. You'd have passed that straight to Ashley Cole and just started playing again". Is it the fear? I don't know. I can't explain it, but that wouldn't have happened at Chelsea.

'As players, you obviously speak about this. I was sat on the bench with Michael Carrick watching the Germany game. And don't get me wrong, Germany were one of the best teams at the World Cup, but I was saying: "If Man United played them at Old Trafford you'd beat them 2-0". If Liverpool played Germany at Anfield, I think we'd beat them. Chelsea would beat them. If they were a Premier League team, they wouldn't win it.

Tactically, though, he concedes, England are lacking. 'I think it's the brain. I think they're cleverer than us'.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-1303119/JAMIE-CARRAGHER-EXCLUSIVE-On-England-Capello-Liverpools-foreign-owners.html

Carra using the royal "us" there

Yet, what of the severity of the remote training camp in Rustenburg, where the players were restricted to the confines of a luxury hotel with only the occasional golf day and safari to amuse them?

'To be honest I don't get that,' adds Carragher. 'I mean, what do you expect from a World Cup? Are you expecting the fair every afternoon?'

Kudos on that tho.

Wow, that's really good!

some other player - ozil or a dutch fella or someone - also came out with a similar "HOW CAN U BE BORED AT THE FUCKING WORLD CUP" quote at the time iirc

That one line has pretty much given him a free pass from me until the next time he gets away with suplexing some guy on the edge of the box.

It's the image of Rooney moaning cos he hasn't got a balloon that makes it I think.

joe cole crying because he's dropped his twist behind the waltzer

John Barnes qualifed to play for England because he'd lived here for a certain amount of years right. So no different to Arteta really? Was there a shitstorm when Barnes was selected?

there were the england fans claiming england won 1-0 when they defeated brazil 2-0 and he scored...

tho that's cos they were racists whereas hating other europeans is perfectly alright

I'm not interested in rescinding the policy unless it's to allow Almunia to continue a fine tradition. Actually no, the qualifying period's only about five years, I'd *love* it if Capello were to troll the entire media and find an entire XI of these guys

Scotland gets first dibs on Arteta, right? Right?

always wondered about this (like if i become recognised suddenly as the genius football player that i am, will i get to choose whether to play for hong kong, england, scotland, northern ireland or wales? despite never have stepped foot in northern ireland???)

Yeah, you would. UK passport with no ties to any of the constituent parts means you can play for any of them.

Raises an interesting question about identity and all that. Unless I'm looking too deeply into this. Fair to say (if you regard the national team as a reflection of national identity/culture etc) that there's as many England fans that "identify" with Mikel Arteta as there are that "identify" with John Terry or Steven Gerrard? i.e. Arteta appears to be a sound guy who keeps out of trouble and is Spanish and therefore amazing at football and we're a tolerant, multi-cultural society etc etc.

i thought this was gonna about the back page of today's sun.

wouldn't agree with arteta 4 england personally.

*googles* - that is majestic, well done the Sun

http://img.thesun.co.uk/multimedia/archive/01112/capello-splash_1112586a.jpg

'arry was never interested in the job, he just wanted to adopt fab for the sanctuary

seriously tho i dont even get that the sun is saying - that even a donkey is smart enough not to pick an injured player?

"axes Carroll"? from what?

        Almunia
_______  ________  ______  _______
        Denilson   Arteta
_______      _______       _______
             _______

feel free to fill in blanks.

Also, is it possible to axe a player who you haven't called up?

xpost

you can have Nacho Novo in that squad if you like, we don't want him.

since when was capello a david lynch extra

it's hard, but we're getting towards a team I could get behind:

              almunia
hargreaves distin jagielka konchesky
malbranque denilson arteta n'zogbia
            ______ ______

I've had to put in a couple of ringers with suspicious foreign-sounding names while we wait for Cuellar and Kaboul to qualify. France claimed N'Zogbia only last week, but that was just a friendly so I think he's in at least until Aurelio notches up the five years. Strikers are a problem, but maybe Zamora and Defoe would do?