Does the entire Innocent Smoothies aesthetic strike you as deeply fucking irritating?

how about when a semi-illiterate epsilon-minus moronic bottle of filth tries to camarade me into thinking it's got a handle on all my deepest animal impulses and needs

In fairness, they only needed to Google you...

Simon Reynolds says:

http://www.earwigsandwax.com/images/oh-snap.jpg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gwd0pZ4RTAU

This one's better: http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=8YBrS5Gr5Pk

This Water? More like piss water...

This rivals Liverpool Tickets Fiasco as best ILx thread ever!

PLANK bottled drinks manufacturers demand IDIOTIC ACUTE ACCENT, where NOW for LITERACY RATES etc

wait, were personal threats ever part of AINYC's steez?

-- Just got offed, Sunday, 20 July 2008 20:29 (Yesterday) Bookmark Link

I think he once told me to "eat hot death". I can't remember why. AINYC rocks.

I've never seen or heard of this glaceau. Usually if I want a drink, I just fill a cup from the cold tap. Being able to do this is an advantage of living ouside of london, I find.

London tap water is delicious and exciting

To be fair, it's a lot more drinkable than Brighton tap water.

Canterbury tap water is the worst I've seen in Britain.

Opaque with natural mossy goodness?

Are you still talking about water, or casting your mind back to 'that' night?

achieving droppage

water from 'the garden of england' can't be that bad

inspired by this thread i bought vitamin water for the 1st time ever today & on the side it says "go party like you're blog-worthy" :D

I was in Sainsbury's earlier and I saw a woman wearing a t-shirt which read "I WORK FOR INNOCENT - FANCY A CHAT?"

http://www.elanso.com/U/D/Ddc/dcd77aa4c08d092b3b5a813481a59f3b/128517612044030000.jpg

Cod in Beer batter + hand cut fries

Cheers, Mate! Health conscious parliamentarians altered this traditional British staple forever by outlawing the use of newspapers to absorb the run-off from this greasy delicacy. We bring back that old-fashioned flavor with all-natural newsprint flavors derived from actual English tabloids (and in England they can swear and show boobies!).

Don't serve chilled!

there's also a Brunch flavor

bigtime. being a friendly "relaxed" company/politician is the new being a ruthless aloof scumsucking asshole

Hmm. Which came first?

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2100/2093003854_85369a993c.jpg?v=1197095572
(aus fruit juice)

http://www.studentbeans.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/innocent_smoothies.jpg
(aforementioned UK drink)

They seem to have appeared at the same time (1999-2000). Curious.

I drink 1 flavour of vitamin water/nutrient water, but only the one with guarana/caffiene in. And only because I loathe sweet soft drink and fruit juices, I like that stuff, its like watered down cordial. I try not to buy them too often though, its just theft of drinking water, innit.

I wish they sold the Fitty grape drink flavored Vitamin Water in uk.

http://image.com.com/mp3/images/genie_images/story/2007/1,2,3-/50cent09_story.jpg

thanks to the v similar packaging, i'd always assumed Innocent and Nudie to be the same coamany, cf this:

http://www.cvcoffee.com/prod_images_blowup/Lays-Potato-Chips1.jpg

http://hamzajennings.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/walkers-400px.jpg

If you want to experience even more twee horror, have a look at the packaging for Pork Farms sausage rolls and pork pies. You can usually find them down the reduced aisle in Sainsburys because they're fuckin horrible and no one actually buys them full price. The worst bit about this is that they're trying to apply the prissy health-conscious marketing tactics of innocent to horrible grey sausage rolls. Nothing twee about sausage rolls.

Fresh Samantha was founded in 1992 in a Scarborough home when Julie Carter began growing sprouts in the basement to sell to local food co-ops.

Carter's son-in-law, Doug Levin, joined the business and began making Fresh Samantha, named for Levin's newborn daughter, in a blender one bottle at a time. A plant in Saco followed and by 1999 Fresh Samantha had annual sales of $25 million along the East Coast. Its juices carried fanciful names such as Desperately Seeking C, Mango Mama and The Big Bang-Body Zoom Juice.

Odwalla bought the company in 2000, and the Saco plant closed the following year. Coca-Cola then bought Odwalla in the fall of 2001.

Some of Fresh Samantha's more popular flavors may be added to the Odwalla line, but Sugarman said there was some overlap, with both lines offering their own versions of orange juice-based, vitamin-C loaded drinks, for example.

> I was in Sainsbury's earlier and I saw a woman wearing a t-shirt which read "I WORK FOR INNOCENT - FANCY A CHAT?"

"Fruit Towers" is actually several units in a trading estate off brackenbury road, W6 and i often see aforementioned t-shirts shuffling into work and those cars that look like grass / cows.

Levin's newborn daughter, in a blender

Pre-HI DERE FAP especially for LJ http://londonist.com/2008/07/free_tonight_13.php

i have tasted vitamin water, it's grim, tastes like weak squash

Beardyman's awesome, my brain can't compute this meshing of great art and piss ;_;

Also "Thursday night hydration club" is perhaps the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard

Oh I thought it was tonight. Thursday night hydration club gives that away really.

There's a vitamin water van parked on my road a lot (it's been there since the Euro games were on actually), but it was only after this thread I noticed that it had those drink descriptions written on it.

lol I unwittingly participated in the marketing of Glaceau recently - some Facebook friend of mine who I've met maybe twice told me he needed to find 'important' people in the locale (NB I am about as far away from important as a human can get) that he could send free drinks to as part of some marketing job he'd just started and could I be one of them? They turned up and I opened the box and remembered this thread. Even if the garbage on the label appeals to you there's so much text that it's pretty indisputably a bad design; moreover I drank the lemon flavour one and it tasted like piss. So there we are

I bought one of these at Newcastle Central station the other day. It was very expensive for such a tiny little bottle, and it wasn't all that TBH.

man i haven't hydrated properly in weeks

ian riese moraine
&
alex in nyc

cordially invite you to celebrate the birth of their son

LOUIS
JAGGER

― and what, Sunday, 20 July 2008 21:20 (2 months ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

^^^the correct way to do a thread run-in

http://notvoodoo.blogspot.com/2009/02/crunchy-fun.html

LOL

awesome

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7986901.stm

drudgesirens set to stun

http://sparky.thehold.net/pix/care-o-meter.jpg

Spent too long (> 30 seconds) arguing about this already today. "Company wants to make money" shockah. Fair play to them, really. They're a fucking overpriced drinks company, not a charity.

Well yeah I'm angling for a tone of dismissive fun-poking rather than shrill condemnation, being on ILX and all, but maybe there are people here who really believed in these lil guys

Fizzy smoothy in a can is the next logical step, I fear.

i had no idea they had set themselves as alt. you can buy it in sainsbury's IF YOU'RE MADE OF MONEY, that is.

i guess the dream is over now.

maybe there are people here who really believed in these lil guys

Jesus. I hope not. Like I said: they're, umm, an expensive-drinks company. <Peers over glasses; looks round> Identify yourselves! So I can mock the living fuck out of you.

I think they saw themselves as alt., yes ... but I don't think anyone else did.

(Actually, no, that's bollocks: my mate, with whom I was "discussing" this on Twitter today, certainly did. But then he's just too bloody nice for words.)

Anyone who's experiencing a sense of betrayal right now can consider it a dress rehearsal for when Cameron gets elected.

Think there's a few Cap'n Save-a-Smoothies upthread. Still overpriced bullshit imo.

Jesus. I hope not. Like I said: they're, umm, an expensive-drinks company.

There are plenty of BEER companies that I do believe in, who I guess play much the same cards as Innocent, but somehow I never really disbelieved that Innocent were anything other than some world-gobbling behemoth in embryo.

I guess I'm just a beer romantic.