Why is my coworker such a fucker

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You guys are all dicks. My other coworkers and I are having fun without you. right now

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 16:12 (nineteen years ago) link

Probably cause your coworker is the one doing all the work.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 16:14 (nineteen years ago) link

How often do you shower, Jon?

― identity theftor (deangulberry), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 16:15 (nineteen years ago) link

actually he isn't. quit being douchebags xpost

i showered 2 times in the last 12 hours

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 16:15 (nineteen years ago) link

Bukkake doesn't count as a shower.

― n/a (Nick A.), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 16:16 (nineteen years ago) link

Don't talk to people in the bathroom. Really.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 16:16 (nineteen years ago) link

I yelled at someone for taking a 30 minute shower today

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 16:30 (nineteen years ago) link

Maybe that is why people don't talk to you?

― identity theftor (deangulberry), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 16:32 (nineteen years ago) link

30 minute showers are not good in the morning when other people need to go to work/class

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 16:34 (nineteen years ago) link

Other people don't care?

― identity theftor (deangulberry), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 16:35 (nineteen years ago) link

He doesn't joke in emails to our listserv.

IT PUTS THE FUNNY IN THE BASKET

― :|, Wednesday, 27 October 2004 16:55 (nineteen years ago) link

I routinely get through my 8-hour workday saying less than 200 words. It's nothing personal: I just have nothing to say to 99.99% of my coworkers, and vice versa.

― Baked Bean Teeth (Baked Bean Teeth), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 16:57 (nineteen years ago) link

I sign birthday cards, but I won't say "happy birthday." Why would I say something I just wrote?

― Huk-L, Wednesday, 27 October 2004 17:00 (nineteen years ago) link

wuold you mind quoting some of your other coworkers jokes, jon? im doign a research on compulsory humour at the workplace. crosspost.

― :|, Wednesday, 27 October 2004 17:01 (nineteen years ago) link

god this freaks me out and i dont even know why.

― :|, Wednesday, 27 October 2004 17:01 (nineteen years ago) link

I find that the less I talk to my coworkers, the better my day goes. Of course, that just means they talk about me more behind my back, but what can you do?

Anyway, Pleasant Plains is totally OTM. I HATE it when my coworkers talk to me in the bathroom, especially when they are in the next stall over.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 17:02 (nineteen years ago) link

we joked about my coworker from hong kong being really cold in rochester today. she has a coat that looks like this:

http://www.collectionscanada.ca/obj/h16/f1/089-4.jpg

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 17:03 (nineteen years ago) link

I NEVER TALKED TO MY COWORKER IN THE LOO

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 17:03 (nineteen years ago) link

what do they call "eskimos", in hong kong?

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 17:04 (nineteen years ago) link

I wish the creepy chucklehead I work with would stop talking to me, it would make my workday a lot less annoying.

― Leon Czolgosz (Nicole), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 17:04 (nineteen years ago) link

My other coworkers love me!

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 17:07 (nineteen years ago) link

Are they loving with you or loving at you?

― Huk-L, Wednesday, 27 October 2004 17:08 (nineteen years ago) link

Or on you?

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 17:11 (nineteen years ago) link

Bukkake doesn't count as a shower.

-- n/a (nu...), October 27th, 2004.

― Huk-l, Wednesday, 27 October 2004 17:13 (nineteen years ago) link

Bukkake doesn't count as a shower.
-- n/a (nu...), October 27th, 2004.

-- Huk-l (handsomishbo...) (webmail), October 27th, 2004 11:13 AM. (link)

― identity theftor (deangulberry), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 17:13 (nineteen years ago) link

Some days I can get by without saying one word to my co-workers. And those are the good days! On the other hand, I waste so much time lurking on this fucking board.

― king_oliver (king_oliver), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 19:07 (nineteen years ago) link

Sometimes...

If I worked in your office, with it's apparent air of enforced bonhomie, I think I'd probably hang myself on my lunchbreak in the bathroom at work, so you should at least be grateful that the poor kid hasn't done that on YOUR WATCH, just yet...

― Quintin forrest (The Eyes), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 22:55 (nineteen years ago) link

he might just be shy.

― Kim (Kim), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 23:25 (nineteen years ago) link

I keep to myself mostly in my team too. I can't stand the constant singing, and gossip and giggling and throwing stuff they do. They also bitch a lot about how they're better than me and a small group of other people (the team is divided right down the centre in a rather sad way), but the people who are being quiet and bitched about are the ones a) doing more of the work (and its more technical) and b) we found out recently we're paid less than the noisy whiners. Yet they are all up in arms and complaining to HR because we got good performance reviews this year and they bombed.

Co worker jollity is fine, and its great to have workmates as friends. But I can't handle the idea that socialising and pissfarting about with joke email lists and throwing toys and going to the pub is cool, and trying to quietly get your work done makes one "such a fucker".

― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 23:34 (nineteen years ago) link

are you in chicago, trayce?

― frankE (frankE), Thursday, 28 October 2004 02:27 (nineteen years ago) link

Not even in the US! :)

― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 28 October 2004 02:29 (nineteen years ago) link

Why?

― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 28 October 2004 02:29 (nineteen years ago) link

One of my coworkers just randomly touched my hair yesterday.

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Thursday, 28 October 2004 02:43 (nineteen years ago) link

My only regular co-worker is a 55-year old lazy hippie redneck who I may have to fire next week. We don't talk much.

― milozauckerman (miloaukerman), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:09 (nineteen years ago) link

i must be the "steve" of my workplace, because most of my co-workers are busy joking with each other and chatting/giggling on their little intranet chatroom about the "annoying newbies" like the bitter failed programmers that they are. they sneer and get impatient when i have a work-related question, so really no incentive at all for being friends with them. as a "fucker", I toss the question back to you and your ilk Jon. why are you such fuckers?

― joseph pot (STINKOR™), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:22 (nineteen years ago) link

*applauds joseph*

― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:32 (nineteen years ago) link

quite honestly I think not even having the decency to say hello back to people is a little beyond your normal level shyness, whether or not it makes a person a "fucker"

― Allyzay Science Explosion (allyzay), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:35 (nineteen years ago) link

different bleeding strokes.

― the surface noise (slight return) (electricsound), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:39 (nineteen years ago) link

having said that i say hello to the people in my team, despite holding a not-so-secret contempt for all of them

― the surface noise (slight return) (electricsound), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:40 (nineteen years ago) link

Sometimes I don't say hi back to women so they get the message I don't want to sleep with them.

― """""calum""""", Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:40 (nineteen years ago) link

so if you DO have the decency to at least say hello back to people, what exactly is your problem with my statement?

― Allyzay Science Explosion (allyzay), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:42 (nineteen years ago) link

I agree with Ally, I had an issue with the "He doesn't joke in emails to our listserv." part of Jons post... maybe he was being teh funny tho, I dunno.

― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:44 (nineteen years ago) link

jeezus, take your personal beef with me elsewhere cockfarmers

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:45 (nineteen years ago) link

LOOK, IF SOMEONE DOESNT ACKNOWLEDGE YOU AT ALL WHEN YOU SAY SOMETHING DIRECTLY TO THEM THAT IS PLEASANT AND NICE AND CASUAL THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG EITH U

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:46 (nineteen years ago) link

Jon dude, chill - I agree with you, people should try and say hi when you talk to them etc... I dunno, your original post kinda came across more like you expect everyone to join in with "jokes and chatting" and seriously, as you can see, a lot of people really dont like doing that at their workplace - and we get bitched at for not being "fun" when we're just tryin' to do our jobs :(

I cant speak for others but I am shy and I like quiet when I work. But yeah sure, I'll say hello if someone does to me. I didnt think that was ever in question?

― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:48 (nineteen years ago) link

(who has a personal beef with you here anyway?)

― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:48 (nineteen years ago) link

people may have their own reasons for not wanting to engage. hate them for it, fine, but it's still their right, if they're not impinging on you in any other way.

xposts

― the surface noise (slight return) (electricsound), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:49 (nineteen years ago) link

I actually can't concentrate on what I'm doing when people walk past and say hi/lean over my partiion and start talking to me or worse, over me to someone else/throw nerfballs over my head at each other/play music/etc

Maybe I'm the grumpy one and thats coo' by me.

― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:51 (nineteen years ago) link

I wish I could work on my own from home. Man, that would rule. I'd never leave the house again except for booze.

― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 28 October 2004 03:52 (nineteen years ago) link

LOOK, IF SOMEONE DOESNT ACKNOWLEDGE YOU AT ALL WHEN YOU SAY SOMETHING DIRECTLY TO THEM THAT IS PLEASANT AND NICE AND CASUAL THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG EITH U

You're right there, but I don't think you should expect people to engage in the office jokeyness. Some people just don't really go in for that kind of stuff, and that's just fine with me.

― Andrew (enneff), Thursday, 28 October 2004 04:49 (nineteen years ago) link

Unless whatever you have to say includes the words "pizza" and "break room", I don't really care to hear it.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Thursday, 28 October 2004 16:34 (nineteen years ago) link

"Incontinent leprechauns are having sex in the break room on top of an anchovy pizza and they're asking for you."

― CAREFUL WHAT YOU ASK FOR (Dan Perry), Thursday, 28 October 2004 16:37 (nineteen years ago) link

I wish I could work on my own from home. Man, that would rule. I'd never leave the house again except for booze.

I might not ever leave the house again, full stop. I'd require a lot less booze if I worked from home.

This thread reminds me of this one:

I hate "fun"

My life is a whole lot better now.

― Hank Tenbeer (kenan), Thursday, 28 October 2004 16:47 (nineteen years ago) link

Trayce, they don't have booze delivery down under? The mind boggles!

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Thursday, 28 October 2004 17:52 (nineteen years ago) link

Some people really are so quiet and or shy though that in their minds they *have* said hello or at least meant to, but all that might have been apparent to the hello-er was a head nod or a tiny sound. This is true.

― Kim (Kim), Thursday, 28 October 2004 21:32 (nineteen years ago) link

Kim I like your technique. From now on I'll consider appending the sentence, 'This is true,' to all my posts (unless they're not).

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 28 October 2004 21:34 (nineteen years ago) link

If only you could also see how I clench my fist and banging emphatically on the table after all my posts.

― Kim (Kim), Thursday, 28 October 2004 21:46 (nineteen years ago) link

She spits at her moniter too! This is true.

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Thursday, 28 October 2004 22:52 (nineteen years ago) link

Only when I'm stupid enough to type banging when I mean just plain old bang. This is true.

― Kim (Kim), Thursday, 28 October 2004 23:00 (nineteen years ago) link

what an inspirign thraed this has become! from now on, my standard porcedure for emphasizing a point shall be:
slamming table with fist,
shoutign "this is true",
pointign between the opposites eyes,
leaning back
and nodding once.

― :|, Thursday, 28 October 2004 23:12 (nineteen years ago) link

this may well be the solar plexus punch of arguing!

― :|, Thursday, 28 October 2004 23:14 (nineteen years ago) link

He said hi today *and* told me the heater is broken.

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Friday, 29 October 2004 14:42 (nineteen years ago) link

Did he tell you expecting you to fix it - or was he reaching out? We may be making progress here!

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 29 October 2004 14:48 (nineteen years ago) link

I also read that, at first, as his heart being broken!
(wich maybe would've explained a lot)

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 29 October 2004 14:49 (nineteen years ago) link

Jon, I'd expect this from a 16-year old work experience kid.
-- B.A.R.M.S. (b4rim4_...), October 27th, 2004.

What does that mean?

-- sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (hot.air.balloo...), October 27th, 2004.

J-dub, I just thought you were being too sensitive is all. And maybe he might suprise you (as evidenced by new post).

― B.A.R.M.S. (Barima), Friday, 29 October 2004 14:49 (nineteen years ago) link

My new co-workers just asked me out for dinner and drinks this evening. Ummm....

― adam... (nordicskilla), Friday, 29 October 2004 14:59 (nineteen years ago) link

having good officemates is such fun.

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Friday, 29 October 2004 15:03 (nineteen years ago) link

You would hate my officemates, Jon.

― adam... (nordicskilla), Friday, 29 October 2004 15:03 (nineteen years ago) link

Today, my (male) co-worker told me that I am "looking small" and am "a very handsome guy". That was at 10am.

― B.A.R.M.S. (Barima), Friday, 29 October 2004 15:04 (nineteen years ago) link

looking small?

― adam... (nordicskilla), Friday, 29 October 2004 15:04 (nineteen years ago) link

Quick, file a million-dollar sexual harassment suit!

― milozauckerman (miloaukerman), Friday, 29 October 2004 15:07 (nineteen years ago) link

when i first read the top post,
i was convinced he was talking about me.
although i'm not called steve. mindyou
half the people in here wouldnt know that.

― piscesboy, Friday, 29 October 2004 15:09 (nineteen years ago) link

Did you have shrinkage or something?

xpost

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 29 October 2004 15:11 (nineteen years ago) link

I should stop working with my dick out, obv.

― B.A.R.M.S. (Barima), Friday, 29 October 2004 15:14 (nineteen years ago) link

fifteen years pass...

never felt like kicking a colleague’s cunt in before but came close today

― ||||||||, Thursday, 13 February 2020 22:21 (four years ago) link

Spill

― Swilling Ambergris, Esq. (silby), Thursday, 13 February 2020 22:37 (four years ago) link

xp. calm yersel big chap

― frederik b. godt (jim in vancouver), Thursday, 13 February 2020 22:39 (four years ago) link

Kick in the cunt
Waving the four-funt

― sorry for butt rockin (Neanderthal), Thursday, 13 February 2020 22:42 (four years ago) link

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