Simpsons quotations

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"But Maura, Knightboat! The crime-solving boat!"

Leee (Leee), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 21:20 (twenty years ago) link

"Since the beginning of time, man has yearned to destroy the sun!"

Sengai, Wednesday, 22 October 2003 21:26 (twenty years ago) link

"man has always loved his buildings, but what happens when the buildings say 'no more!'"

stevem (blueski), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 21:44 (twenty years ago) link

Wiggum, throwing a Johnny Depp chocolate statue on the fire:
"You made us melt, and now we're gonna do the same to YOU!"

Saw that last night, it cracked me up.

Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 21:59 (twenty years ago) link

"A crazy guy shot a bunch of people, and then the subway ran over my hat..."

Ally C (Ally C), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 22:38 (twenty years ago) link

"Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn."

Justyn Dillingham (Justyn Dillingham), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 22:41 (twenty years ago) link

"Jesus must be rolling over in his grave!"

Justyn Dillingham (Justyn Dillingham), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 22:42 (twenty years ago) link

"Although we can't reach the boy, we can freeze him with liquid nitrogen so that future generations can rescue him!"

Justyn Dillingham (Justyn Dillingham), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 22:43 (twenty years ago) link

"Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn."

Not said by Moe, I betcha

Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 23:02 (twenty years ago) link

From the same episode Justyn just quoted:

"It's an old fashioned hole-diggin'. By gum it's been a while."

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 23:36 (twenty years ago) link

two weeks pass...
Homer: "Yvan Eht Nioj! You've gotta love that crazy chorus!"
Lisa: "What does it mean?"
Homer: "Eh, it doesn't mean anything. Like 'rama lama ding dong' or 'give peace a chance'."

Curt1s St3ph3ns, Thursday, 6 November 2003 22:04 (twenty years ago) link

three months pass...
"I love my wife very much. The only thing I'm gonna use this bed for is sleeping, eating, and maybe building a little fort."

oops (Oops), Friday, 20 February 2004 00:23 (twenty years ago) link

Willie (singing) "I'm gonnae puke in some hay!"
From one of the new eps, I wish I could remember the rest of his drunken tractor-driving song, it was hilarious.

Trayce (trayce), Friday, 20 February 2004 00:36 (twenty years ago) link

My favorite Willie quote: "Grease me up, woman!"

latebloomer (latebloomer), Friday, 20 February 2004 00:41 (twenty years ago) link

yeah that new one with the singing is my fave newie in aaaaaages

(xp)

the surface noise (electricsound), Friday, 20 February 2004 00:41 (twenty years ago) link

"Nibbles, chew through my ball sack!"
- Principal Skinner, totally out of context. Honestly.

Trayce (trayce), Friday, 20 February 2004 00:45 (twenty years ago) link

God we're behind though - "The President Wore Pearls" showed in the US in Nov last year! We only got it this week! And theyre showing this season all out of order, as per usual grr.

Trayce (trayce), Friday, 20 February 2004 00:48 (twenty years ago) link

"oh my god!
an illegal counterfeit jeans smuggling operation running out of my own car hole"

robin (robin), Friday, 20 February 2004 01:32 (twenty years ago) link

Maude Flanders: "This isn't about love, it's about s-e-x in front of the c-h-i-l-d-r-e-n"
Krusty: "Sex Cauldren?! I thought they shut that place down!"

BrianB (BrianB), Friday, 20 February 2004 04:50 (twenty years ago) link

Bart: "You killed the zombie flanders!"
Homer: "He was a zombie?"

latebloomer (latebloomer), Friday, 20 February 2004 05:15 (twenty years ago) link

Otto: I don't need drugs to enjoy this, just to enhance it.

Aja (aja), Friday, 20 February 2004 21:29 (twenty years ago) link

"i don't even know anymore"

Felonious Drunk (Felcher), Friday, 20 February 2004 21:39 (twenty years ago) link

Bart: Otto man? You're living in a dumpster?

Otto: Oh,I wish. Dumpster brand trash bins are top of the line. This is just a Trash Co. waste disposal unit.

Aja (aja), Friday, 20 February 2004 21:41 (twenty years ago) link

And theyre showing this season all out of order, as per usual grr.

Oh yeah, that famous Simpsons continuity. ;p

Leee Majors (Leee), Friday, 20 February 2004 21:49 (twenty years ago) link

Marge: This is the worst thing you've ever done!

Homer: You say that so much it's lost all meaning.

Aja (aja), Friday, 20 February 2004 21:51 (twenty years ago) link

Aja: What?
Homer: You say that so much it's lost all meaning.

I jibe because I love. =)

Leee Majors (Leee), Friday, 20 February 2004 21:57 (twenty years ago) link

Haha!

That is funny.

What if it was

Aja: I want to meet Dave Grohl.

Homer: You say that every day! Why don't you just give up and forget about it. You'll never meet him. And don't even try because trying is the first step to failure.

Aja (aja), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:00 (twenty years ago) link

Frinky: "Brace yourselves, gentlemen. According to the gas chromatograph, the secret ingredient is... Love!? Who's been screwing with this thing?"

stevem (blueski), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:55 (twenty years ago) link

Maybe I should have spelled this out way back when, but this thread where we were supposed to converse solely in Simpsonian dialogue and then marry our attractive cousins.

Leee Majors (Leee), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:58 (twenty years ago) link

Frank "Grimey" Grimes: "wow, this is a palace. i live in a studio above a bowling alley and below another bowling alley."

metfigga (metfigga), Friday, 20 February 2004 23:13 (twenty years ago) link

Homer: Frank Grimes wasn't married. How could he have a son?!

Jr (Frank Grimes' son): He happened to like hookers, ok?

Aja (aja), Friday, 20 February 2004 23:17 (twenty years ago) link

ten months pass...
I'm coo-coo for contraband!

Jimmy Mod always makes friends with women before bedding them down (ModJ), Monday, 17 January 2005 01:29 (nineteen years ago) link

Lisa: I think we're gonna die, Bart.
Bart: We're all gonna die, Lisa.
Lisa: I meant soon.
Bart (forlorn): So did I.

ryan (ryan), Monday, 17 January 2005 01:45 (nineteen years ago) link

Marge: You have the right to remain silent!
Homer: I choose to waive that right. BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! BLARRGHAARGHH AARGHHR.

Trayce (trayce), Monday, 17 January 2005 01:49 (nineteen years ago) link

"It was the best of times, it was the BLURST of times!"

ryan (ryan), Monday, 17 January 2005 01:50 (nineteen years ago) link

"I've been to vietnam, afghanistan, and iraq. And I can truthfully say without hyperbole that this is a million times worse then all of them put together."

ryan (ryan), Monday, 17 January 2005 01:51 (nineteen years ago) link

There's only one word for this: idiocy.

Ferg, Ah (Ferg), Monday, 17 January 2005 01:56 (nineteen years ago) link

four years pass...

made me lol last night, from the 'krusty gets a bar mitzvah' episode:

bart: how do you know all this stuff?
lisa: i have an imaginary jewish friend. her name is rachel cohen and she just got accepted to brandeis.

ØmÃĨr Littel (Jordan), Friday, 1 May 2009 15:52 (fourteen years ago) link

two weeks pass...

When's the cut-off for the newest reference that can be made? Late 90s?

kingfish, Thursday, 21 May 2009 02:30 (fourteen years ago) link

when was "shaving my shoulders.. i'm gettin it all shaved off" from? that's the most recent one i quote regularly

jump in the looool (electricsound), Thursday, 21 May 2009 02:45 (fourteen years ago) link

Hah, I saw that one the other day on my dvds actually. Forget which ep but it was an earlier one I think.

KF I dont understand your question.

Trayce, Thursday, 21 May 2009 03:08 (fourteen years ago) link

Oh and what did people think of the Maggie voiced by Jodie Foster doing the Fountainhead thing? ^%$%$#$% This isnt the right thread for that but whatevs (the ep itself had some good bits, but that was just ridiculous)

Trayce, Thursday, 21 May 2009 03:12 (fourteen years ago) link

I'm saying, off of how new an episode can you make a reference or a quote and fairly expect it to be understood?

kingfish, Thursday, 21 May 2009 04:04 (fourteen years ago) link

shaving my shoulders is season 10 apparently, for some reason i thought it was more recent

jump in the looool (electricsound), Thursday, 21 May 2009 04:10 (fourteen years ago) link

"Attractive cousins"? What the hell?

Leee, Thursday, 21 May 2009 04:21 (fourteen years ago) link

I'm saying, off of how new an episode can you make a reference or a quote and fairly expect it to be understood?

Ahh right, yeah thats a good question. Its interesting how heavily a lot of the very old episodes/seasons catchphrases have sunk in but yes, I wonder if there's much from very recent ones? Anything past season... 12, say? Hard to know, it all blurs after a while.

Trayce, Thursday, 21 May 2009 05:12 (fourteen years ago) link

You'll see all your favorite soccer stars. Like Ariaga! Ariaga II! Bariaga! Aruglia! And Pizzoza!

Trayce, Thursday, 21 May 2009 05:15 (fourteen years ago) link

no-one's gay for moleman :(

jump in the looool (electricsound), Thursday, 21 May 2009 05:21 (fourteen years ago) link

I'm gonna be singing "I'm shaving mah shoulders" all night now.

Trayce, Thursday, 21 May 2009 06:13 (fourteen years ago) link

Lisa, in this house we obey the laws of thermodynamics!

Trayce, Thursday, 21 May 2009 06:14 (fourteen years ago) link

I mean i took the phrase from a scene where homer is in a fuckin bar and not a bathrom

marcos, Thursday, 6 November 2014 21:51 (nine years ago) link

two months pass...

Well it says here we're Ratt

paolo, Saturday, 10 January 2015 20:39 (nine years ago) link

Now whar's me toothpick?

Montgomery Burns' Jazz (Tarfumes The Escape Goat), Saturday, 10 January 2015 22:20 (nine years ago) link

bf has taken to putting beercaps on my head and calling me queen of the harpies, recently.

I checked Snoops , and it is for real (Trayce), Sunday, 11 January 2015 05:38 (nine years ago) link

three months pass...

Where's my spy camera?

paolo, Wednesday, 6 May 2015 17:28 (eight years ago) link

that ep is def. top ten all time. easily best of the season

Mr. Snrub, Wednesday, 6 May 2015 17:33 (eight years ago) link

three months pass...

A co-worker of mine was talking to his mother on the phone just now, and mentioned his wife and kids going to the county fair with some friends and said, "They're Albanians," and before I could stop myself I interjected, "You mean all white with pink eyes?"

I might like you better if we Yelped together (Phil D.), Thursday, 13 August 2015 19:52 (eight years ago) link

I hope he got the reference.

a poetic ODE to FORNICATION (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Thursday, 13 August 2015 20:01 (eight years ago) link

He did!

I might like you better if we Yelped together (Phil D.), Thursday, 13 August 2015 20:03 (eight years ago) link

stuck in my head since I came across it again last weekend.

"If something's hard to do, then it's not worth doing. You just stick that guitar in the closet next to your shortwave radio your karate outfit, and your unicycle and we'll go inside and watch TV." "What's on?" "It doesn't matter."

xyzzzz__, Thursday, 13 August 2015 20:20 (eight years ago) link

and:

"I was a fool to help that horrible old man!" "I hope you learned your lesson Lisa. Never help anyone."

xyzzzz__, Thursday, 13 August 2015 20:29 (eight years ago) link

Someone at work was asking of a training aid designed by one of our other sites "What's inside the electrical cabinet?"

I couldn't help saying "a family of possums. The big one is called Bitey."

ONE OTHER PERSON got it.

suffeeciant attreebution (aldo), Friday, 14 August 2015 19:15 (eight years ago) link

Mission accomplished, man. Also get a job at a better company.

a poetic ODE to FORNICATION (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Friday, 14 August 2015 23:19 (eight years ago) link

Has the show got better again? I remember several people saying it had gone seriously downhill a bit over a decade ago so I haven't really sat through new ones since. Noticed the drop in quality and move toward formula at the time. It involved things including the treatment of the characterisation of Homer where he just became mindlessly stupid.
It also moved away from the visual quotations of films which I liked from earlier seasons.
I noticed it went from sidesplittingly funny to just about humourous and largely formulaic.
So has it got good again?

Stevolende, Saturday, 15 August 2015 06:56 (eight years ago) link

Not that I've noticed. The recent flurry of posts here is for old episodes.

nickn, Saturday, 15 August 2015 07:00 (eight years ago) link

yup - if I ever see anything that I think is new I switch off.

xyzzzz__, Saturday, 15 August 2015 07:31 (eight years ago) link

four months pass...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7trn91xkJ0w

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, 15 December 2015 04:03 (eight years ago) link

"What was her problem?"

albvivertine, Tuesday, 15 December 2015 06:37 (eight years ago) link

one month passes...
two months pass...

"Malibu Stacy: America's favorite eight-and-a-half incher..."

a spate of non-fatal hammer attacks (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Saturday, 23 April 2016 10:07 (seven years ago) link

eight months pass...

I can never resist saying, after completing almost any domestic task from washing the dishes to making the bed, "And that's the end of that chapter"

Wimmels, Saturday, 7 January 2017 17:08 (seven years ago) link

one year passes...

Skinner: "excuse me is there an orange Julius stand on this floor?"

Lionel Hutz: "I'll sell you this one, its almost full!"

Skinner: "well why don't I drink out of a toilet bowl?" *walks away*

Lionel Hutz: "he'll be back"

well bissogled trotters (Michael B), Saturday, 17 March 2018 12:14 (six years ago) link

six months pass...
one year passes...

[Aging congressman has heart attack]

Marge: Quick! Somebody perform CPR!

Homer: [Thinks for a moment, starts singing] I see a bad moon rising

Dunty Reggae party 🎉 (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 1 March 2020 13:39 (four years ago) link

Are you mad, Frink! Put down that science pole!

Hideous Lump, Sunday, 1 March 2020 14:43 (four years ago) link

Speaking of Frink: "Ivan Reitman!"

Hideous Lump, Sunday, 1 March 2020 14:44 (four years ago) link

Not sure what prompted the below exchange to pop into my head this morning but it made me happy:

Grimey: But it's a contest for children!
Lenny: Yeah! And Homer beat their brains out!

cwkiii, Sunday, 1 March 2020 23:16 (four years ago) link

It's not the mayor's fault that the stadium collapsed

Wuhan!! Got You All in Check (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Sunday, 1 March 2020 23:25 (four years ago) link

But what about daddy daughter day?

paolo, Monday, 2 March 2020 20:02 (four years ago) link

five months pass...

You've got a date with the Xerox machine

paolo, Wednesday, 5 August 2020 17:43 (three years ago) link

one year passes...

It's a regional dialect

paolo, Wednesday, 30 March 2022 07:33 (two years ago) link

five months pass...

Let's see if they wore underwear back then

paolo, Monday, 19 September 2022 08:15 (one year ago) link

I am sad to report that I have reached the age where classic-era Simpsons is way more fun to quote than to watch

That said...

no one who speaks German could be an evil man!

Paul Ponzi, Monday, 19 September 2022 23:52 (one year ago) link


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