Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

Sorry Onimo for some reason I did not even see your post, was replying to DM.

let's bitch at our stupid, annoying co-posters

eh if i were posting as some sort of omniscient expert on the subject this might be a thing. but i saw this at work, it was strange (i don't think the existence of a wikipedia article would necessarily change that) and pretty annoying behaviour from two annoying co-workers.

?

no worries Suzy :)

think I'm getting a bit tetchy on here, might be time for a sabbatical.

People at my place are either starting to play dumb, or are becoming mental midgets fast.

Yesterday I'm assigned research to determine, among other things, why a specific item was not mailed to a customer. In the end, my research determined that the person responsible for mailing the item was the person that requested the research, a fact that was documented in a very obvious manner had she bothered to look.

Wouldn't you think that even if the name didn't ring a bell, you'd at least double check to make sure it wasn't your responsibility first before wasting someone else's time? This is a frequent occurrence!

ever since my boss got married, he's scatterbrained as hell. forgets to send me invites, doesn't reply to emails or messages, is unresponsive to everyone (including a poor coworker who tried to ask him three times to get a laptop so she could work from home while nursing her poor husband back to health)...it wouldn't bother me so much if he didn't give us all the speech about how we shouldn't be letting personal lives affect work.

he also interrupts people in the middle of sentences all of the time so if you haven't made your complete point in three words, forget it...you'll never get to finish it.

realized today that i work at the mexican version of jersey shore

lol

club hounds who come in hungover on tuesday, a totally closeted bodybuilder, way too much eyeliner, and constant drama regarding guys i've never seen named "mike" and "julio" with regard to which of the two of them has texted most recently

we had two co-workers arrested on site for something I can't really specifically mention but it involved conspiracy for fraud

last week that is

I got a companywide email today announcing that all employees now get a free chiropractic adjustment every month. Wonderful. I still haven't gotten the salary and benefits I was told I would qualify for over three months ago, so it still costs me $250 a month to maintain access to a real doctor, but thank goodness I no longer have to worry about the dread SUBLUXATIONS.

they can't deny you benefits if you qualify per plan provisions. that'd be an ERISA violation. have you not gotten the benefits because they simply haven't mailed you anything, or did you attempt to enroll and were you told you couldn't?

if they impede you too much in getting what you were promised, you can always go to the Department of Labor.

This is a tiny company (12 people) and the promise wasn't in any formal context, just a "oh hey, you've been here a while, how about we set you up with salary and benefits if you make it through the holidays alive."

"setting you up" w/ a salary is kinda important iirc

xpost I see. Regardless of the size, though, if the company offers insurance through ERISA and the employees pay for it on a before-tax basis, they can't merely drop the ball like that or they can risk losing the ability to offer before-tax benefits. I'm sure you're probably not trying to rock the boat, but I'd be like raising holy hell over it. they have to give you at least a 31 day enrollment period too.

I'm starting to get worried my job is turning to me into an Angry Man.

I can't seem to get through a day here without getting into a strop about something, F'ing and blinding etc.

What do you do when it seems like 80% of the people you have to deal with at work are incompetent? I've been here 4 years which is the longest I've ever worked anywhere and I think it's probably at least a year too long. This team seems to spend most of its time lately tidying up other people's mistakes and working on what is probably the most badly managed "upgrade" project I have ever worked on.

I just got my wife a job at this company as well, haha. I get an "introduce a friend" bonus when she's been here 2 months, at this point I think I'm going to hand my notice in the day after that cheque clears.

Argh.

i find that when i'm getting all pissy about everything it's probably time for a break. when was your last vacation?

Funnily enough we are going on holiday next month. That will help, but I still have to get through 4 weeks without getting fired for calling a manager a cunt.

well - try to send your thoughts towards wherever you're off too. even knowing you'll be getting away soon can help.
how long, btw? two weeks?

Yep, we're off to L.A.! Woohoo! Actually I feel better already. Thanks :)

srsly MICROSOFT OFFICE COMMUNICATOR

morelike microsoft monitor ur subordinates working hrs..

Two things:

1. Our department is big on tracking work (presumably so bigwigs can cut our headcount later down the line if they think we're "slow"), which makes sense. It's used to determine the projected hours we work on tickets we open in a database. Sometimes it gets to be ridiculous. The project I'm on now may take me 40-60 hours to complete. Because of teh stupid archaic way we have to create tickets for this project, it will likely take me 4-6 hours just to create them (during which time I of course can't get any real work done). I've spoken up a million times about the process being bad and made other suggestions but they fall on deaf ears.

2. This guy in our dept is nice but overcommits to things, then makes mistakes as a result of being overwhelmed. He was in charge of doing an editorial review of documetns we were passing onto a client. he did this with a partner. turns out he made 33 mistakes -- 40% of the items we sent over had to be redone. FUCKING USELESS.

lady who I never talk to but who walks around with a janitor's ring of keys - I love you and you are absolutely fine otherwise but that ring of keys has got to go imo

Is she a janitor?

no

"Okay, I've acknowledged your opinion Sean, but I don't think you're being really considerate of my feelings"

The guy my boss recently hired to directly supervise me, arguing with my boss about some shit that's completely set in stone since way before he got here. If you ignore my proofreading comments, yes, expect Sean to ignore your feelings, dick.

― kingkongvsgodzilla, Wednesday, July 8, 2009 9:36 PM (10 months ago) Bookmark

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Oh man, dude, we're cool and all, but stop exclaiming "FUDGE!" when something upsets you. Every two hours or so.

― kingkongvsgodzilla, Wednesday, November 4, 2009 11:50 AM (6 months ago) Bookmark

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Part of my job is to screen potential donors for our non-profit organization. My coworker and I usually field requests for this information from the front-line fundraising staff, who may have heard about a person's name from a news story or had it suggested to them by another donor or something.

Whenever a name comes down the line that my coworker thinks would be unable to make a major gift, he dismisses them as "b1g n0b0dies" - e.g. "Look out, we've got another b1g n0b0dy coming through"; "I don't understand why they keep sending us all these b1g n0b0dies".

It's rude as hell. However much money these people make, they are always serious professionals with much higher caliber careers than he has.

(googleproofed because he says it so much it's like a catchphrase)

― kingkongvsgodzilla, Wednesday, December 16, 2009 11:59 AM (5 months ago) Bookmark

Okay, so today the director of my group pulled me aside and let me know that I would be reporting directly to him, rather than this guy referenced above. The guy has so many "personality conflicts" with the rest of our coworkers that I'll be taking over all duties from our team that involve interacting with other people.

I found this out at the end of the day today, so I can't imagine how awkward things are going to be tomorrow, but I'd like to add to the collection this choice catch-phrase, which has become more commmon as of late:

"I think I need to be on Xanax or something!"

congrats? (will they pay you more?)

convince him that "orsom theeng" is tagalog for "a fungo bat to the head"

i hate them all, apart from ian and john

ffs, stop speaking at a zillion miles an hour please

M.A., I know you're a nervous sort, a jabberer and an interrupter, but YOU WILL NEVER FIND OUT THE ANSWER TO YOUR QUESTION IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP.

We've got a snorter in the office. Turns my fucking stomach umpteen times a day.
He also does that horrible cough thing that gets out of control and ends up with phlegm being chewed and swallowed.

How can somebody sneeze SEVERAL TIMES A DAY EVERY DAY for MONTHS???? YEARS EVEN???????????????

not ONE person in my office can laugh like a normal person, or in fact laugh at anything REMOTELY funny

Here's a peeve that I would never have as a pet. It's straight out of the movie "Office Space", really. Someone explains something to you, and it's simple and clear, and you understand and repeat the instructions back so that everyone understands that everyone understands. But then there are certain people who cannot walk away without quickly summarizing the interaction for you again. Real-life example:

designer lady: "When you look at the Photoshop file, you can see these subheaders are actually grey. That's a different header style."

me: "Ah, I missed that. Thank you. So I need to take out the h3, and replace them with h4 tags."

her: "That's exactly right."

(one comedy beat)

her: "So if you could please just make the page look like the Photoshop file, that would be better."

GAHHHH! You just said that! I understood it! You know I understood it! You understood perfectly how well I understood it! You said so! What is it with you and having the last word PLUS the next to last word?

also the tic of saying "if you could do (x) then..." and no one who has this tic knows what to say next so they just end with "uh that would really great". it's a construction that allows them to avoid feeling like they've just told you what to do, which is in fact what they've done

I have both of these on the (very rare) occasions I get to tell anyone else to do

feel faintly ridiculous with the "...uh then that would be great thanks" because it makes it sound like the task is not necessary or useful, just something I would find pleasing to look at after its needless completion

desperate urge to fill the silence when realising I have run out of new things to say and am not really confidently businesslike enough to declare the talking over

Yeah, I'm sure that most of the time it's just a bit of padding for the end of the interaction, but it can come across as a need to exercise one last bit of authority, whether further instruction is needed or not. It's not that it's unnecessary, it's that it's officious.

please don't fucking tell me how desperate you are for hours, only to turn down 4 out of 5 shifts offered to you AND try to take a bunch of time off during one of our busiest months when there are 4 fucking staff already on holiday.

this isn't even directed at just one annoying coworker but FUCKING TWO OF THEM. gah.

ENTIRE DAY GETTING ASSBUTTED BY GIANT SMELLY BLIND WOMAN GOD I HATE LINE WORK KILLME OMG DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON DUDE WHO SNIFFS BRAS

We've got a snorter in the office. Turns my fucking stomach umpteen times a day.
He also does that horrible cough thing that gets out of control and ends up with phlegm being chewed and swallowed.

UGGGHHH this is one of my most loathed things ever. Seems to be common among SE Asian ppl for some reason, mayb a cultural thing I dunno. A taxi driver did it the other day while driving me home - horked up a gob, wound down his window and hocked it out. BLEUGH. DONT GIVE ME YOUR PLEURISY YOU FUCK.

A bunch of stupid stuff happened today, just like most days, but this one takes the cake:

We're all having a reaaaally busy day (long boring story, but right now, where I work, is sorta like April 14th at the IRS). Everyone's a bit stressed out, and we're all overloaded with meetings. We only have about 20 minutes for lunch before another meeting at 12:30. At 12:28, I run back to my desk and start chugging a Subway sandwich so my stomach doesn't growl for the rest of the afternoon. Just as I'm about to fiiiinally take a bite, my stupid, annoying co-worker comes in and goes "I'm soooo hungry!" and just watches me bite into it. I offer him half my sandwich, even though I'm really hungry and I pretty much want all of it. He asks what's on it and I say "it's a veggie patty". He rolls his eyes and starts complaining and talking about how it'll be embarrassing if someone finds out he ate a veggie sandwich, and within about 15 seconds, no shit, he's saying "I'm doing you a favor, buddy. I'm doing you a favor, eating this...ewwwww....god, you owe me".

HE'S EATING HALF MY SANDWICH THAT I GAVE TO HIM EVEN THOUGH I'M STARVING AND COMPLAINING ABOUT THE INGREDIENTS, AND SAYING I OWE HIM!

http://i48.tinypic.com/i3ufsg.jpg
^me 2 1/2 minutes later

LOL. I would have taken the other half of sammich and smooshed it into his gob.

i seriously would have told him to stfu and not eat it then. what is with people?!

I did! I told him "you're eating my sandwich, I don't owe you!" but he just laughed and walked away and said "you owe me, buddy, I'm doing you a favor, ewww"

WTH.

Oh god that sucks, but speaking as a vegetarian who eats at subway, their veggie patties are garbage. Better off just getting a cheese sandwich with a ton of real veggies on it.

Or a pizza.

Boss is rarely in the office all day, she is today, she is intensely annoying

Shut up shut up shut up shut up.

(directed at coworker, not Tom D.)