ITT: LEO 'KING' MESSI

Also still love the lol alternate universe where Sheff Utd get their bid for Maradona accepted.

There's an alternative universe where Romario and Ronaldinho played for St Mirren. I'm still kind of amazed that I ended up in the one where Caniggia played for Dundee.

Don't listen to him, nakh - he was all 'Robinho is going to walk this'

that's more or less true xxp but it doesn't affect claims to messi's greatness, even if you take 25% off his domestic goals total to compensate for it he still has unreal figures

when I say the Premiership, I mean the icosahedral nexus of equally-privileged factions in buoyant concomitance

it is perhaps the most exciting title-race in years too, but the overall quality beyond, say, fulham and everton is diabolical

of course messi is fucking great - would like to see him savage a few Premiership defences

rly like dunn-diouf-pedersen-kalinic tho

I mean the icosahedral nexus of equally-privileged factions in buoyant concomitance

and individual primera liga clubs selling their own tv rights leads to insane levels of disparity where ronaldo earns 100 times more than some of the miserable souls tasked with defending against him

you're probably the only ILXor bold enough to come out as a fan of anything about Blackburn Rovers let alone Diouf, so kudos for the chutzpah if nothing else. although Dunn has some nice touches.

that's kinda capitalism gone bonkers :/

of course messi is fucking great - would like to see him savage a few Premiership defences

― LiveJournal (acoleuthic), Monday, 22 March 2010 11:09 (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

;_; you'll see it next week

kalinic is rightly going to obtain the patronage of a hoy hoy as THE NEXT ZLATAN sometime next season after a backheel thru the legs of kieran gibbs, followed by a £16m january move to juventus and a bidone d'oro

ahhh but that's a European Cup defence, not a Premiership one ;)

xp

kalinic is the shefki kuci it's ok to warily praise

of course messi is fucking great - would like to see him savage a few Premiership defences

i mean, surely the opposite? the only reason ronaldo escaped unbussted is because there were no defenders quick enough to catch him. and he played in the same team as vidic.

hence 'ryan shawcross amirite' - crippling messi would be an act of great artistic expression - very futurist

messi has such stubby little legs unlike poor spindly calcium deprived aaron ramsey who subsisted on leeks and haribo until he was 17

Shawcross- "It was an expression of my determination to destroy the artisan ideal that has prevailed throughout the footballing landscape for what seems like aaages, darling"

kalinic? really?

my stance on underrated forwards-

klasnic and lee @ bolton - cool.
cameron jerome and chucho - cool. (ruined by what team they are at obv).
kalinic - not done anything to ever make me care.
llorente - never gonna get a chance because of more attractive spanish strikers but i like him.
rocchi - see above, change spanish to italian.
cavani - looking pretty exciting last couple times i've seen him. closest lol midtable striker to be on a NEXT ZLATAN type shizz, I guess.
acquafresca also looking pretty exciting

player i'm most wtf he looked awesome where did he go - victor obinna

ur forgetting rodallega for sure.

ha, i thought about incl. him. too inconsistent to make the WIGAN PLAYER GOES TO BIG CLUB jump (but then I thought the same of Valencia) but occasionally he looks class.

more likely to be kenny jones replacement at sunderland

oh and i guess torres counts as a midtable striker these days.

rodallega and jones- arsenal really should be looking hard at these guys imo.

spurs too tbh.

there are loads of promising players at wigan

if only their chairman would promise to stfu

maybe in exchange for you rebranding as dwmac

also 10% of the ownership rights of guetamalan wing back twins

what do you know about me and guatemalan twins? i have a very good solicitor on retainer u should know this

when I say the Premiership, I mean the icosahedral nexus of equally-privileged factions in buoyant concomitance

I heard Andy Townsend say exactly the same thing on ITV the other week.

haven't kept up, has this vid been posted yet?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33Rfvorw9Ao&feature=related

that's pretty much the same goal he's been scoring a couple of every week lately, ya? No creativity that lad.

kalinic's is the classic slavstriker career arc so far of awkward first season followed by great second and subsequent £16m move to big club, or the more likely £3m sale to midtable spanish team and seven years of pichichi awards. (alternatively he'll be turning out for panathiaikos in 6 months, whatever. also no you can't have 'pichichi man' as your username.)

can't be bovd to load whole thread but if anyone's put forward the "somehow just cannot give a shit about leo fucking messi" challops then i got your back homie.

maybe you could get dr morbius to cosign?

yeah not giving a shit about messi is like hating anything enjoyable ever done with a football

I still think is too early for him to be put on THE LIST with cruyff, maradona, di stefano... He's going to have to do a lot more with the Argentina shirt on before that

lol he's done more than di stefano did in an argentina shirt. pick them as his only country for one.

however it is also like loving everything enjoyable about footballers. i dunno, this little fucker is just boring to me - he's like a really well-honed pro evo cutscene. where is the ridiculousness in his joy, the joy in his ridiculousness? yknow? he does not have the cartoonishly awesome frisson of the true great, whatever the stats might say.

i have tried to enjoy watching Messi but every time i turn a game on he seems to have a hoy hoy vigourously riding his dick, and my constitution is a little sensitive for such displays.

Di Stefano played half a dozen games, won one Copa América and couldnt do much since AFA screwed then. Anyways he was a better player for national teams than Messi has been

Maybe if we're really lucky he'll be caught with two transsexual prostitues or something.

That's a bit harsh, but 'cartoonishly awesome frisson' is an excellent test of greatness I reckon. If Messi doesn't have it right now, who does?

there is something dispiriting about the ease with which he can destroy sides with the same few moves but necessity is the mother of invention and he has gradually improved his playmaking and long shots as he plays more centrally

i'm not sure if 'the ridiculousness in his joy, the joy in his ridiculousness?' isn't a product of oversaturation, even if you were around during maradona's time i'm guessing it wasn't that easy to see his every game/goal in hd youtube embeds

i'm going to have to stop being enthusiastic about things i guess. wish i was as jaded as u hipsters.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/blog/2010/mar/22/leo-messi-barcelona-la-liga-spain - good Sid Lowe article, don't worry hoyey, you're not alone in your wild enthusiasm.

thread needs more Ray Hudson if you want to see real dick-riding

a hoy hoy dick riding messi >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> a hoy hoy dick riding diaby tbh

can you use another phrase please

sid lowe is the worst for messi hype anyway, he wrote an article just like that about daniel alves

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/blog/2009/jan/26/dani-alves-barcelona-leo-messi

Daniel Alves one of those ridiculously great players who is surprisingly disliked by britishers?

a hoy hoy dick riding messi >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> a hoy hoy dick riding diaby tbh

― DarraghmacKwacz (darraghmac), Monday, 22 March 2010 21:29 (21 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

These past couple weeks I have been starting to think... hmmm, one day Diaby could actually live up to NEXT VIEIRA hype and might be good enough that one day we can carry on without Cesc? Totally different kind of midfielder though so we'd have to change things around but his form has gone from lol comparisons to jenas to omfg am i watching xavi in an black french guy disguise?

however it is also like loving everything enjoyable about footballers. i dunno, this little fucker is just boring to me - he's like a really well-honed pro evo cutscene. where is the ridiculousness in his joy, the joy in his ridiculousness? yknow? he does not have the cartoonishly awesome frisson of the true great, whatever the stats might say.

― r|t|c, Monday, 22 March 2010 19:33 (2 hours ago) Bookmark

There's a real element of truth to this - hell, I've said it about Barcelona - but my main issue here is that great as Messi is, football, even great football, is about more than one man. There's a good deal of Messi-shaped tunnel vision going on at the moment; it's as though footballers who aren't cutting through defences three times a game are incapable of greatness. As a team sport, football is always going to be defined by a collective effort, and as a worldwide sport, defined by more than one team. There's as much beauty in a lower-league player transcending his or her professed abilities and doing something magnificent on a football pitch as there is in the world's most decorated player challenging his. Messi is not the be-all and end-all of what we fans ought to love about football; he is impermanent and mortal, and his time shall pass - football has not acquired new definitions. He's merely a lot more consistent at dribbling, passing and shooting than most players we've seen. A thousand Craig Fagans on a thousand pitches in a thousand years would emulate Messi's greatest goals; his genius is in the regularity of his brilliance.

Yes because Barca only have Messi and people watching them do not care for the work of Zlatan, Iniesta, Xavi, Keita, Pedro, Alves etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.

Also I don't think anyone on this thread is saying that because watching Messi is a joy that suddenly lower-league football doesn't have its own qualities? You are making an argument out of nothing?

What you mean is, he can do things deliberately and regularly that Craig Fagan would fluke one time out of a billion. Way to puncture the hype.

It's arguments like

yeah not giving a shit about messi is like hating anything enjoyable ever done with a football

― he might have even have gone in. (a hoy hoy), Monday, 22 March 2010 19:20 (3 hours ago) Bookmark

which rile me. Comparatively to my giving-a-shit-about-football, my giving-a-shit-about-Messi is negligible. Dude's damned skilful, sure, and he does great things, but the cornucopia of brilliance I have witnessed in football is far, far vaster than the feats of one man - he is as Sirius to the firmament