Your Terrible Band Concept Stockpile

Take a sniff
Pull it out
The taste is gonna move you
when you pop it in your mouth...

To be sung with much imaginary cock-stroking, etc.

What happened to Darth Brooks?

And has anyone heard that one STEED song, "De Canter of Blood?" It's on the B side of "Gaits of Hell?"

Some ideas from back when I was at University:

- an anti-boyband called FU2. Songs about getting drunk, getting into fights, cheating on girlfriends, shoplifting, vandalism, etc. - album was to be called "Y*O*B*S", short for "Yer Original Bastard Sons".

- "Herman Hollerith's Blues Machine" - a band where the drummer is a stuffed gorilla with a drum machine slung around it's neck, the singer is a blow up doll, and the guitarist is a cardboard cutout of Eric Clapton propped up against a large reel-to-reel tape machine on a wooden dining room chair.

- The Vicar & The Warlord. A rip off of a Fry and Laurie sketch, album was to be called "The Personification of Raw Sex".

- The Sick Six - a band with five members, the sixth member being a drum machine, a bit like Lothar and the Hand People, but with regular instruments. I thought that it might be a supergroup made up of people from other student bands, as a way of using up all the crappy half finished songs.

- Tamag0tchi Sex Explosion - gigs would be improvised jams based off "At The Copa (Copacabana)" by Barry Manilow.

- NWA tribute band called "Nigels With Attitude". All white guys, each one playing the role of a stereotype: cockney, nerd, public school posh guy with a monocle, geezer, etc., with names like Dr. Nigel, Nigel Cube, and Easy Nigel. Album to be called "Straight Outta Croydon". Sample lyric: "Straight outta Croydon, a crazy motherfucker called Nigel Cube, from the gang called Nigels With Attitude...".

Some ideas from back when I was at University:

Genre: Bubbleglum (sad bubblegum music)
Stage Name: Sven Diagram

Darth Brooks got the cops called on us once. Our drummer is in 3 other bands so we never get together anymore; a shame too because I put in a lot of work figuring out how to run my bass through every amp I own.

Some of which are guitar amps, of course.

A band that I thought about starting at school:

- "Black Ash", typical 14 year olds' idea of a metal band, the name is funny because I meant "the ashes of destruction", and the usual teenage doom kind of thing, etc., but it wasn't until years later that I realised it sounds like the colour description on a carton of flat pack self assembly furniture.

One word: Banjovi

All banjo Bon Jovi cover band, if you needed that explained...

the mary janes: get a trio of girls, dress them like a modern-day shangri-las, then get them to sing jesus and mary chain covers (with the feedback replaced by reverb). each one calls herself mary-jane, of course.

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame:

2 drummers, 1 bass players, 3 keyboardists, 1 percussionist, 6-8 guitarists, 1 tambourine player, 6 backup singers, 3 regular singers, all doing mid-tempo versions of the classics, i.e. All Along The Watchtower, Produ Mary, etc.

ha ha

a completely straightforward led zeppelin covers band

an anti-boyband called FU2. Songs about getting drunk, getting into fights, cheating on girlfriends, shoplifting, vandalism, etc. - album was to be called "Y*O*B*S", short for "Yer Original Bastard Sons".

Should've gone for it! At the right moment this actually could have been mildly successful in a one-hit-wonder novelty "No Pigeons" type of way.

I did consider it, but for some reason I thought there was a risk that people wouldn't get the joke and instead they would take it seriously. So on the one hand there would be outraged Daily Mail readers who would consider the group a "threat to fabric of society", and on the other hand teenage boys who would think of them as role models. It sounds crazy to say that now, but I was a bit detached from reality at the time.

"Steely Danzig"

A band of multi-instrumentalists called The Gay Taliban, possibly wearing pink/purple burqas with sequins, knocking out lounge-type covers of popular music. We played a few college events/formal balls and so on back in 2002/2003.

Abba Abba Hey - Ramones songs, done in the style of ABBA. (It would be absolutely awful the other way around though - much as I adore the Ramones.)

Google returns 191 results for the phrase, so I guess I'm not the first to hit on the admittedly obvious wordplay, but at a glance, none of these seem to be a cover band concept...

A doom metal band that does cover versions of Chuckle Brothers songs.

Ramones songs, done in the style of ABBA = this would basically sound like the Bay City Rollers, right?

"Steely Danzig"

-- S-, Friday, December 14, 2007 1:37 AM (1 month ago)

this gets bonus points for awesome

<i>this would basically sound like the Bay City Rollers, right?</i>

More girl singing, surely.

I hate to rain on any parades, but explorers of the Ramones-Abba continuum may like to cast their eyes this way:
http://www.gabba.co.uk/

(They got some press a while ago, I think Peel played some of their stuff)

1) A male, effeminate modern synthpop duo, replete with heart-on-sleeve romantic lyrics, called Sucralose.

2) A fake-German one-man glitchy laptop techno project called Mausklicker. First single to be called "Doppelklicker"

I was thinking about creating a cartoon rap persona called Flex Lovely for about one day, then I decided against it...

so what I've been recording for the RPM challenge has turned into a fantasy live record of a duo of clones of myself, set in a distant subterranean future.

It seemed more appropirate to post that in this thread than in the RPM one.

haha omg approPIRATE

N.I. vs N.I.C.

O I FORGOT:

TREKKIN' - a Grateful Dead cover band with lyrics rewritten to involve the Star Trek universe ("what a long strange trip it's been" -> "what a long strange trip through the delta quadrant it's been for Voyager")

DANGER MAN by HOTWIRE

I'm a one man racetrack baybeh!/Faster than a naked eye!
Goin the wrong way/Down a one way street
With mah helmet on backwards and the lights off...

The lights off...

THE LIGHTS OFF!

THE LIGHTS OFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!!

HEY!

[Widdly guitar solo that goes on for six minutes while images of people driving rhino-sized American musclecars straight into each other are superimposed onto the stadium walls, driving half the audience into galloping convulsions]

Baybeh if you like dan-ger/You don't have to look too far......
Baybeh if you like dan-ger/Get inside my fucking car!

All my friends think I drive like a dick/I go too fast and it makes them feel sick
I wanna wanna wanna go really really quick/But they're just jealous about my car!!!!

[The stage is invaded by robot ninjas in a pirate ship piloted by she-bitches from the darkest bowels of heck. They fire spaghetti out of their eyes and into the crowd while security run scared]

[Alastair Stewart from Police! Camera! Action intones over a quintiple-guitar attack solo]:
Look at this bozo - 'e thinks 'e's smart, but the police are smarter. What a berk!

[Movie footage of Alastair Stewart's head being run over several times and then exploding like a rotten old Halloween pumpkin what's got caught on fire]

CHORUS:

I'M A DANGER MAN/THAT'S WHO I AM
I'M A-SPEEDING FAR ACROSS THE LAND
I'M A CHEETAH ON A MOTORBIKE

COS I'M A DANGER MAN...
DANGER MAN...

DANGER MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!

had an idea for a stoner metal band w/a theremin player

all lyrics based on pulpy "it came from OUTER SPACE" sci-fi

loosely psych obv

an Oi! band named Michelle Malkin Hatefuck

When I was 16 I thought there totally needed to be a shoegazer band that went everywhere in robes and cloaks. Like shoegazing monks. With hoods.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/0/03/Infern0-1152720270_i_1784_full-1-.jpg

had an idea for a stoner metal band w/a theremin player

all lyrics based on pulpy "it came from OUTER SPACE" sci-fi

-- BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Sunday, April 13, 2008 4:09 PM (53 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

loosely psych obv

-- BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Sunday, April 13, 2008 4:10 PM (53 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

who will form this band with me

Screensaver: a pop duo, sort of a cross between Dollar and Kraftwerk during their Man-Machine dummies phase. The audience would never really be sure who the singers were, or even if they were real people. I would be the sinister svengali controlling it all.

black sABBAth.

nuff said.

had an idea for a stoner metal band w/a theremin player

all lyrics based on pulpy "it came from OUTER SPACE" sci-fi

-- BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Sunday, April 13, 2008 4:09 PM (53 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

loosely psych obv

-- BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Sunday, April 13, 2008 4:10 PM (53 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

who will form this band with me

I would LOVE to be in this band. But my theremin is borked.

About 10 years ago I had an idea for a Nazi disco band. All the band members would have Hitler moustaches and wear jackets with swastikas made of sequins. We would play covers of disco hits with offensive re-worked lyrics (e.g. "I Won't Survive") in thick German accents. I almost convinced some drunk friends to do this at a house party in Santa Cruz. Probably for the best that we chickened out.

It might have gone over better in Russia: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VbuTV86ZXe0

Suddenly - Nikki Sudden tribute band

Weedwhacker - sXe landscape architects rock out

Britney's Peers - shady Florida promoter assembles pre-fab band of young boys & writes songs for them in the style of Incapacitants

I never got around to actually implementing my terrible band concept - probably due to lack of anyone who remotely knew how to play instruments as well as no venue.

It would basically be a super-heavy droney stoner metal type band that only played one huge loud riff over and over until something - anger from the audience, sore hands, power getting cut off - forced us to stop. We would be called Caveman Simulator and would hopefully be dressed like dirty-ass 70's Hells Angels.

Ebenezer and the Scrooges -- a Christmas-themed Stooges tribute band

"Say It Ain't Surf" the weezer surf cover band

http://www.mediafire.com/?ytyzddtos2m

Steed Lord's debut full-length record "Truth Serum" will be out worldwide in the coming weeks. I wanted to reach out and send you a link to an 11-minute continuous mega mix with teasers of all the new tracks that will be on the record:

Their sound:
This is a very unique live electronic act from Iceland that has huge cross-over appeal to many different audiences. Their sound has been described as "electro-crunk with a serving of legitimate disco."

C'MON

Man I hate the way PR people always say "reach out." Why do they have to do that?