Hi-Fashion Ironic Vintage Metal/Punk Kitsch

Oh yeah, I hold The Face responsible for this whole trend, but that doesn't matter cause we pulled A Fast One on them and faked their entire fucking coke issue over a few drinks at the Sunday Vodka Syndicate last month, mwah hah hah hah.

Well, Alex, you apparently have seen a much cooler group doing the retro irony thing. I was recently in Kensington Market scouting around the used/vintage clothing places, and the retro music shirts there were simply apalling: Kiss from the non-makeup phase, Journey, and Winger. FUCKING WINGER. I mean, at least Slayer is somewhat cool, but the idea of some 14 year old walking in and plopping down 20 bucks on a previously sweat-soaked Winger shirt is just wrong in so many ways, I don't even want to think about it.

If the guys in Mogwai and Godspeed You Black Emperor took to sporting Yngwie Malmsteen t-shirts, I'm certain that they could elevate him to the proper god/icon stature he deserves to be in the post-rock circles.

The Gang of Four is doing far too well in the Cultural Revolution, aren't they? What would the Great Helmsman say?

On Children's BBC one of the presenters was wearing a Europe T-shirt! A Europe T-Shirt...Sweden's greatest ever hard rock band...I actually thought it'd be kinda funny if some kid later saw a Europe CD and bought it coz this presenter was weraing their T-shirt! I still have my Iron Maiden T-shirt but unfortunately it's from the Sevnth Son era and doesn't fit anymore...I could sell it some trendy I guess! :)

Martha Stewart Living Magazine, April, 2005, Page 21, California Closets Ad

Pre-teen boy playing his drums in front of a highly organized closet wearing a Iggy & The Stooges - Raw Power t-shirt!

I'm a streetwalkin cheetah with a shelf full of shoe horns!

a runaway son with a closet full of iZods/
I'm the town's preppiest guy/
I'm the one who's shops and who buys/