i have mentioned it ad nauseum on here but: carrot top ("CT" to his friends) is a v friendly person
― itdn put butt in the display name (gbx), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:09 (fourteen years ago) link
i will also go on record as thinking pauly shore is basically hilar
― Tracer Hand, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:10 (fourteen years ago) link
yeah there was one tape of his that I thought was real funny in high school
― dmr, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:12 (fourteen years ago) link
just remember, if newsweek makes fun of washed-up comedians, it's lame, but if idolator makes fun of washed-up musicians, it's hilaAAAAAArious
― congratulations (n/a), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:19 (fourteen years ago) link
I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said "Stop! don't do it!" "Why shouldn't I?" he said. I said, "Well, there's so much to live for!" He said, "Like what?" I said, "Well...are you religious or atheist?" He said, "Religious." I said, "Me too! Are you christian or buddhist?" He said, "Christian." I said, "Me too! Are you catholic or protestant?" He said, "Protestant." I said, "Me too! Are you episcopalian or baptist?" He said, "Baptist!" I said,"Wow! Me too! Are you baptist church of god or baptist church of the lord?" He said, "Baptist church of god!" I said, "Me too! Are you original baptist church of god, or are you reformed baptist church of god?" He said,"Reformed Baptist church of god!" I said, "Me too! Are you reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1879, or reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1915?" He said, "Reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1915!" I said, "Die, heretic scum", and pushed him off. -- Emo Phillips
― Valid point, imaginary rude person (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:20 (fourteen years ago) link
that's not really a very funny joke
― itdn put butt in the display name (gbx), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:21 (fourteen years ago) link
silence *cough* silence
― jØrdån (omar little), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:22 (fourteen years ago) link
i went fishing the other day, and i caught a big beautiful fish. i wanted to mount it, but... there were people around.
― goole, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:25 (fourteen years ago) link
Emo Phillips is a genius. And he was married to Judy Tenuta for a few years. Imagine that household.
― dan selzer, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:26 (fourteen years ago) link
P.S. ILX killed Danny Gans.
― I HEART CREEPY MENS (Deric W. Haircare), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:29 (fourteen years ago) link
"I like going to the park and watching the children run and jump around, because you see, they don't know I'm using blanks." — Emo Philips
― dan selzer, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:31 (fourteen years ago) link
commode-ians
― Whiney G. Weingarten, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:36 (fourteen years ago) link
The wit and wisdom of Emo Phillips:
"Women: You can't live with them, and you can't get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi costume and beat you with a warm squash or something..." _______________________________"My girlfiend said to me in bed last night' 'you're a pervert' I said, 'that's a big word for a girl of nine'."
_______________________________
"My girlfiend said to me in bed last night' 'you're a pervert' I said, 'that's a big word for a girl of nine'."
Ew!
― Daniel, Esq., Tuesday, 17 November 2009 19:21 (fourteen years ago) link
If you didn't learn from Gallagher, beware of prop comedians.
― Meade Lex Louis (James Redd and the Blecchs), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 19:29 (fourteen years ago) link
what was even the point of them running that list if they weren't going to go after Dunham?
― some dude, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 19:42 (fourteen years ago) link
yeah, isn't he the most "current" ?
― itdn put butt in the display name (gbx), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 19:43 (fourteen years ago) link
Emo Phillips is great.
― windy = white, carl = black (polyphonic), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 19:43 (fourteen years ago) link
The Dunham blurb was the only one that made me laugh!
― lift this towel, its just a nipple (HI DERE), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 19:45 (fourteen years ago) link
Famous prop comic Bobby Hill did not make the list.
― mascara and ties (Abbott), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 19:50 (fourteen years ago) link
my bad somehow i skipped past Dunham in the gallery, thought he wasn't there
― some dude, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 19:50 (fourteen years ago) link
emo's bit about the dog getting run over is hysterical. i can't believe he's on any list like that at all it's just baffling.
― piscesx, Wednesday, 18 November 2009 12:30 (fourteen years ago) link
I thought you meant Emo Phillips' religious joke was:
"I prayed to God for a new bike, but my mom told me God doesn't work that way.So, I stole a bike and prayed to God to forgive me!"
― Mark G, Wednesday, 18 November 2009 12:47 (fourteen years ago) link
Feel bad for saying it but... Stewart Lee
― I Poxy the Fule (Tom D.), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 12:43 (fourteen years ago) link
Feel bad for asking this but . . . who is Stewart Lee?
― Daniel, Esq., Tuesday, 24 November 2009 12:49 (fourteen years ago) link
Sorry, I got it.
― Daniel, Esq., Tuesday, 24 November 2009 12:50 (fourteen years ago) link
i thought stewart lee is pretty funny.
― I sb'ed your mum (ken c), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 12:54 (fourteen years ago) link
He is also due to appear on Celebrity Mastermind, with jazz-improv guitarist Derek Bailey as his special subject.
― The bugger in the short sleeves (NickB), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 12:56 (fourteen years ago) link
Seems like a great bloke, heart's in the right place, good taste, not funny
― I Poxy the Fule (Tom D.), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 12:58 (fourteen years ago) link
I think Stewart Lee's very funny. But his style is quite... singular.
― Communi-Bear Silo State (chap), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 13:01 (fourteen years ago) link
emo philips is funny: "I was pulled over in Massachusetts for reckless driving. When brought before the judge, I was asked if I knew what the punishment for drunk driving in that state was. I said, "I don't know... reelection to the Senate?"
― as they say in Finnish: "lihaperäpukamat (remy bean), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 13:03 (fourteen years ago) link
Emo Philips can write a damn good joke, but I can't really stomach his delivery.
― Communi-Bear Silo State (chap), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 13:04 (fourteen years ago) link
quite liked that church one actually. better if PBPhilBrown was the guy trying to stop the person from jumping though
― I sb'ed your mum (ken c), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 13:06 (fourteen years ago) link
More to comedy than saying a funny line, of course
― I Poxy the Fule (Tom D.), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 13:07 (fourteen years ago) link
Emo's wonderful, I agree. And I love his delivery.
― Christine Green Leafy Dragon Indigo, Tuesday, 24 November 2009 13:59 (fourteen years ago) link
The only Emo line that I can ever remember is something like: 'My cousin died from a bee sting. He was a tightrope walker'
― The bugger in the short sleeves (NickB), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 14:02 (fourteen years ago) link
So many comedians rely on the delivery and never bother to write a funny line that I'll settle for a funny line any day of the week and twice on Tuesday.
― Of course I want frosting. I'm a Scorpio. (kenan), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 15:30 (fourteen years ago) link
those last two emo jokes were pretty good!
― itdn put butt in the display name (gbx), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 15:30 (fourteen years ago) link
Yes, but imagine him saying it
― I Poxy the Fule (Tom D.), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 15:31 (fourteen years ago) link
While Cook isn't inherently unfunny, and has some very good material, he's suffered from spreading himself too thin...
This Newsweek article was written by an ardent Dane Cook apologist. It's borderline evil. Don't read it!
― Of course I want frosting. I'm a Scorpio. (kenan), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 15:32 (fourteen years ago) link
i have never seen/heard emo phillips
― itdn put butt in the display name (gbx), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 15:33 (fourteen years ago) link
Emo Philips is great with a punchline. Once you get his whole groove, you understand that swallowing the punchline is his exaggerated way of being uncomfortable with consistently writing such funny goddamn punchlines. All comedians hate themselves, after all.
― Of course I want frosting. I'm a Scorpio. (kenan), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 15:35 (fourteen years ago) link
thanks for the psychiatric pro-tip
― itdn put butt in the display name (gbx), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 15:38 (fourteen years ago) link
Hey, I only know what I hear on television.
― Of course I want frosting. I'm a Scorpio. (kenan), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 15:40 (fourteen years ago) link
From comedians.
― Of course I want frosting. I'm a Scorpio. (kenan), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 15:41 (fourteen years ago) link
He does have some good material, it's just that Richard Herring came up with it in the '90s.
― DavidM, Tuesday, 24 November 2009 15:42 (fourteen years ago) link
BTW, Andrew Dice Clay may be horrifyingly offensive, and he did enjoy the profits from the most Nazi batshit audience following ever for a comedian, but when he has a joke to tell, he knows how to tell it.
― Of course I want frosting. I'm a Scorpio. (kenan), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 15:43 (fourteen years ago) link
I could never listen to Emo Phillips long enough to hear the jokes, his voice and delivery are too off-putting.
― ô_o (Nicole), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 15:50 (fourteen years ago) link
xp ...and when he doesn't have a joke, he knows how to not tell it. Look, the guys first comedy album was a double-CD 2-hour affair called "The Day The Laughter Died", was produced by Rick Rubin (!), and had a sticker on the front that said "Warning: This album contains no jokes." He has a bit about being pissed off at the price of shampoo, so he dumps the contents of a cheaper bottle on the supermarket aisle "like somebody's load" and fills it with the more expensive stuff. It takes a certain bent to get it, I grant you, but the dude could be really funny. Almost as an art project, more than as someone who tells jokes.
― Of course I want frosting. I'm a Scorpio. (kenan), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 15:51 (fourteen years ago) link
After a while, I don't think he got the joke anymore either. Which is a problem.
― Of course I want frosting. I'm a Scorpio. (kenan), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 15:52 (fourteen years ago) link
swapping cheap stuff at supermarket with expensive stuff is one step up from the wonky trolley wheel, i suppose
― I sb'ed your mum (ken c), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 16:00 (fourteen years ago) link