thread to get over a breakup

I really know how you feel right now tbh dude :/

I feel like I really blew it and am never gonna meet anyone else I will be happy with.

Man, I feel for you. I went through this for so long after my last breakup. Thought I'd never be the same again, that I'd never be able to really feel that way about someone and that nobody could ever possibly love me again. That I wasn't even worth it if they did. And that I'd have this hurt for the person who left me in me for the rest of my life.

Eventually I met someone else. I like her now instead. I almost never think about my ex at this point. It can and will happen, bro. Eventually you'll be better.

Havin' a cat helps iirc.

I feel like I really blew it and am never gonna meet anyone else I will be happy with.

^^^that was me today.

I hate to say it, Sara(h? still not clear on this), but you'll probably feel that way for a long time :\ I know I've felt this way before--after both of the other 'serious' relationships i've had in my life--and it takes a long time to go away. In fact, it usually doesn't go away until you meet someone new, in my experience. but tbh I don't even really want to meet anyone new? I kinda have this snobbish thing going on where I think most of my peers are shallow & naive.

I guess that's why I always date older women.
And clearly that hasn't worked out so well.

Sarah with an "h"

I kinda have this snobbish thing going on where I think most of my peers are shallow & naive.

are these the ones you know or just in general?

i guess just the ones i know? though tbh the average twenty-something i overhear on the street yapping into his or her cell phone does not inspire much hope.

early, mid, or late 20-something?

which is not to say that i despise my friends or ilxors or co-workers or anything. i think they're good ppl overall. but i can't remember the last time i was introduced to someone at bar or a party who seemed worth keeping in touch with.

mid.

i see a lot of people in their mid-20s through the course of one of my jobs, and my perception is kinda like yours, but then i'm just seeing them at shows and parties, and i think the environment might be a significant part of that.

There are many fish in the sea, it's a shame so many of them come with toxic levels of mercury. :(

or else they're bland, boring, or you're pretty sure that they won't agree with your stomach - to continue the metaphor.

okay enuff self-pity for me tonight, trying to get some rest.
I hope your situation plays out in a way that's not absolutely miserable for you Sarah. Good luck.

goin thru biggest breakup of my life iirc; broke up with the 3 coolest dudes ever :(

band breakup? me too

si

harder than i thought it would be. been with em longer than ive been in any relationship, or any job, or anything

that sucks. :(

like all of my relationships though, i quit

:( sorry dude. ours isn't too dramatic since sarah and i are still married obviously and drummer is our friend and we'll see him around and i think we're all ready for a break but it's still kinda sad sometimes

sorry dudes :(

its ok theres other shit.

sorry roxy :(

sorry to hear it, roxy : /

Maybe you should become a solo bass player? You never see those around, there must be a huge creative vacuum to be filled.

Oh my god! I'm sorry, to the both of you.

Band breakups, I've found, are always way more traumatic and heartrending than the romantic kind.

Good thoughts to all involved.

roxy can fill jaco pastorius' shoes

Don't fret (groan...)

band break ups :(

at least bands have a way better chance of getting back together than couples

getting back together is never an aspiration with couples for me.

i aspired to this for the first five days, but now i've come to terms with it basically being over.

u r awesome and he is obviously a retard for not appreciating u properly sarahel <3

thanks dude!

freal tho, he will prolly always feel a pang of regret over this

yeah, he probably will. we're talking almost 1/3 of our lives so far have been together, and we've been through a lot of shit. we pretty much agreed that even though we weren't married, it was really like a marriage.

i know it is early days and u need a mourning period but i feel like when u r ready u are strong enough to totally transcend this or whatevs

thanks, because i totally do not feel that way. i'm really fucking scared.

i am totally hugging u thru the internet and I'm not normally a hugger

awww - your tuppence collages are so awesome.

The swallow is building a nest,
Building a nest and singing,
And every time she places a straw,
She remembers her former nest.

Only once before she built a nest,
But she mended it many times,
And then, the last time she returned,
She found the nest in ruin.

But now she is building a nest again,
Building a nest and singing,
And every time she places a straw,
She remembers her former nest.

She remembers, too, the past year,
When, as she gathered food for her young,
The bloodthirsty enemy
Snatched them all from the road.

But once again she is building a nest,
Building a nest and singing,
And every time she places a straw,
She remembers her former nest.

--- Ghazaros Aghayan (1840-1911)

^^^^^ booming poem imo.

I kinda have this snobbish thing going on where I think most of my peers are shallow & naive.

got this going on too, it sucks.

sarahel, you'll pull through! you've always struck me as one of the most down to earth and levelheaded posters here - I'm sure you'll come out of the tunnel fine

thanks!

IKR otm

sarah, i know it's super scary now and there's really no way around that - that's just the way it goes - but just keep reminding yrself that you won't always feel this way. you might even be surprised how quickly you move on.

Hugs and encouragement for sarahel and roxy.

I agree w/ the solo bass star thing! Dudes with acoustic guitars do it all the time, and they're the worst.

roxy why are you quitting the band?

ian that poem is incredible

yes, yes it is.
i did not write it, obviously.
a friend posted it on lolfacebook today; and i thought i'd lost the ability to be moved by poetry.

just sent it to one of my exbandmates tbh

im quitting the band because i am turning thirty and the idea of starting over makes me feel tired. we were at a crossroads where something big was possible, but big changes had to happen, and i realized i cared more about being good than being successful

\(o_O)/