Enjoying an immersive coffee experience, at home

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As we learn to strive & thrive under lockdown, you may ask - how can I enjoy the single origin bean experience? The roast, the aroma of the coffeehouse? It can't be possible at home.

But, it can. An ultra-premium coffee experience, robust brews twinned with authentic artisanal fare - all in the comfort and coziness of your abode.

We welcome all questions, comments and feedback - to make your at-home coffee experience the very best that it can be.

Tokyo Ghetto Stüssy (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:05 (four years ago) link

We have a nespresso.

El Tomboto, Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:11 (four years ago) link

gimme a big steaming mug of chicory at 4:30am and i’m set for the day

He is married to Brogmus, Linda. (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:14 (four years ago) link

We have a nespresso.

We recommend our Nespresso® compatible capsules with a special nitrogen flushing method that deliver the theatre of the coffeehouse to your residence.

Pre-Raphaelite Brah (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:15 (four years ago) link

i watched a youtube video on how to use my v60 properly

the ghost of tom, choad (thomp), Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:16 (four years ago) link

gimme a big steaming mug of chicory at 4:30am and i’m set for the day

Our signature chicory blend presents an inspirational bite.

Pre-Raphaelite Brah (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:17 (four years ago) link

i watched a youtube video on how to use my v60 properly

You will be further inspired by the fresh taste of coffeehouse blend.

Pre-Raphaelite Brah (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:19 (four years ago) link

I have a moka pot and some lavazza, all I'm missing is a milk frother, if anyone has any tips on how to improvise one then please do share. I have a beast of a vitamix if that can work somehow.

Wuhan!! Got You All in Check (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:20 (four years ago) link

one can easily improvise a milk frother by the simple expedient of firmly blowing through a straw into a glass of milk

He is married to Brogmus, Linda. (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:22 (four years ago) link

I'm a busy man, bg. Maybe I can rig up some sort of attachment to my hoover.

Wuhan!! Got You All in Check (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:24 (four years ago) link

that’s the kind of can-do attitude we need in these challenging times

He is married to Brogmus, Linda. (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:25 (four years ago) link

what about that quarter second of meaningful eye contact as the barista delicately pulls the shot?

an incoherent crustacean (MatthewK), Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:26 (four years ago) link

one time i tried to hoover up a wasp, then it was alive in the cylinder so I hoovered up some smoke to kill it, then I sucked up a burning ember and the whole thing turned into an inferno, and I had to throw it in the garden. wasp still somehow survived. can't go so badly this time though.

Wuhan!! Got You All in Check (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:26 (four years ago) link

I have a moka pot and some lavazza, all I'm missing is a milk frother, if anyone has any tips on how to improvise one then please do share. I have a beast of a vitamix if that can work somehow.

Our signature I Coglioni Milk Frother can create froth from your desired milk (from dairy to almond to oat), ensuring that you can enjoy & take inspiration from the coffeehouse experience in your cozy dwelling.

Pre-Raphaelite Brah (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:29 (four years ago) link

what about that quarter second of meaningful eye contact as the barista delicately pulls the shot?

Our talented baristas are standing by on Zoom, to support & inspire your morning grind.

Pre-Raphaelite Brah (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:31 (four years ago) link

what about that quarter second of meaningful eye contact as the barista delicately pulls the shot?

― an incoherent crustacean (MatthewK),Thursday, 16 April 2020 13:26 (thirty-eight minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

jesus the eroticism

steer calmer (darraghmac), Thursday, 16 April 2020 14:05 (four years ago) link

jesus the eroticism

An erotic blend of our single-origin Nespresso® compatible signature capsules & inspirational virtual barista guidance.

Pre-Raphaelite Brah (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 April 2020 22:13 (four years ago) link

what about that quarter second of meaningful eye contact as the barista delicately pulls the shot?

― an incoherent crustacean (MatthewK), 2020年4月16日 星期四 下午 11:26 (four days ago) bookmarkflaglink

this is the precise reason i switched cafes last year

karmic blowback for dissing pip and jane baker (Autumn Almanac), Monday, 20 April 2020 10:37 (four years ago) link

btw pato can you please pull me a three-quarter double shot soy latte (properly made) with extra froth and two lumps (one before, one after) and foam art that indicates you platonically love your customers

karmic blowback for dissing pip and jane baker (Autumn Almanac), Monday, 20 April 2020 10:39 (four years ago) link

one good thing about quarantine is that I don't have to retreat to the Costa across the road to edit my mixes while the boss's daughter sits nearby, pretending I'm not there. one bad thing is that I have no time to myself at all as 3 children will not leave me alone for more than 5 minutes. on balance, I am saving £2.70 per day.

Wuhan!! Got You All in Check (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Monday, 20 April 2020 10:59 (four years ago) link

one month passes...

Our new signature portable MiniPresso® espresso coffee machine is designed for a new breed of culture seekers - Proactive Nomads, or better put, Promads. Driven by responsible journeys towards enlightenment & understanding, Promads can now enjoy our signature blend as they take the trail less travelled & explore deep consciousness.

Pre-Raphaelite Brah (King Boy Pato), Friday, 29 May 2020 11:12 (three years ago) link

sounds expensive

i will FP you and your entire family (rip van wanko), Friday, 29 May 2020 11:32 (three years ago) link

two weeks pass...

Our coffee-forward brand is committed to change in communities. Please refer to our 300-word press release on how we stand for change.

Pre-Raphaelite Brah (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 16 June 2020 12:53 (three years ago) link

four months pass...

While you wait for the results, have you tried our limited-edition maple blend? The perfect brew for falling leaves, rainy days & not being pumpkin spice 'coz those other assholes have the market wrapped up for that flavor.

Our digital baristas are standing by to make your coffee experience the very best it can be.

Pre-Raphaelite Brah (King Boy Pato), Saturday, 7 November 2020 00:11 (three years ago) link

Is the digital barista crush worthy?

calstars, Saturday, 7 November 2020 00:36 (three years ago) link


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