essential nfl tweets

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Jim Schwartz

Kid Rock "Early Mornin' Stoned Pimp". Cause a Detroit party don't stop y'all.!/jschwartzlions/status/153484067940204546

Roberto Spiralli, Wednesday, 25 January 2012 03:17 (twelve years ago) link

lock thread, we have a winner

Johnny Fever, Wednesday, 25 January 2012 04:13 (twelve years ago) link

one month passes...

Jim Irsay
‏@JimIrsay a place.....where nothing...............nothing never happens!/JimIrsay/status/177971346385534976

Jim Irsay

Sometimes I think of Tweeter,sometimes I think of Jan....sometimes I don't think of nothing...but The Monkey Man.....!/JimIrsay/status/176908754590253056

Jim Irsay

Oz never did give nothing 2 the tin man...that he didn't,didn't already have!/JimIrsay/status/175100696360783872

Roberto Spiralli, Saturday, 10 March 2012 22:06 (twelve years ago) link

irsay needs to get the fuck off of twitter

J0rdan S., Saturday, 10 March 2012 22:07 (twelve years ago) link

Jed York

Thanks for choosing the #49ers Alex. Sorry it was a tough week...
Retweeted by Jason La Canfora!/JedYork/status/182525042641481731

Roberto Spiralli, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:06 (twelve years ago) link

one month passes...

didn't realise Norv had a nickname

Troy Aikman

Happy 60th birthday to my good friend @chargers Norv Turner! Hope you planned something special Nancy!

Roberto Spiralli, Thursday, 17 May 2012 19:27 (twelve years ago) link


call all destroyer, Thursday, 17 May 2012 19:29 (twelve years ago) link

i hope norv's wife is named nancy, otherwise that is kinda sad

(Name Withheld to Avoid Hassle) (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 17 May 2012 19:29 (twelve years ago) link

her name is nancy

J0rdan S., Thursday, 17 May 2012 19:33 (twelve years ago) link

okay, feeling better about that.

(Name Withheld to Avoid Hassle) (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 17 May 2012 19:38 (twelve years ago) link

her name is nancy

― J0rdan S., Thursday, May 17, 2012 3:33 PM (11 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i'm just going to choose to ignore this "fact"

call all destroyer, Thursday, 17 May 2012 19:45 (twelve years ago) link

I think we just found Norbert a new nickname


Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 17 May 2012 19:47 (twelve years ago) link

I'm watching reptilian conspiracy videos on YouTube. #davidicke. I like some things he says, but I don't know about this one buddy lol

polyphonic, Sunday, 27 May 2012 04:05 (twelve years ago) link

would love to know what things david icke has said that arian foster likes

Roberto Spiralli, Sunday, 27 May 2012 12:47 (twelve years ago) link

five months pass...

I do not have Instagram people #JustSaying

seriously, THIS GUY (daria-g), Tuesday, 20 November 2012 01:09 (eleven years ago) link

ten months pass...

donte' stallworth is recounting the 20th century history of iran tweet by tweet

Roberto Spiralli, Tuesday, 1 October 2013 02:13 (ten years ago) link

Brandon Bolden ‏@BB_HulkSmash 2h
You might think you're fully aware of what's best for everyone... More for Aquarius
Brandon Bolden ‏@BB_HulkSmash 9 Oct
Your vivid imagination is running on overdrive now and it's ex... More for Aquarius

Brandon Bolden ‏@BB_HulkSmash 8 Oct
It's nearly impossible to think about having fun when things a... More for Aquarius
Brandon Bolden ‏@BB_HulkSmash 7 Oct
Being appreciated for your contributions at work is a real boo... More for Aquarius

Brandon Bolden ‏@BB_HulkSmash 6 Oct
There may be a recent misunderstanding or a mistake that conti... More for Aquarius

Brandon Bolden ‏@BB_HulkSmash 5 Oct
Your key planet Uranus keeps you on pins and needles all day t... More for Aquarius

Brandon Bolden ‏@BB_HulkSmash 4 Oct
You have an exciting opportunity to expand your horizons now b... More for Aquarius

Brandon Bolden ‏@BB_HulkSmash 3 Oct
Sometimes when others feel tension, you just feel the buzz of ... More for Aquarius
Brandon Bolden ‏@BB_HulkSmash 2 Oct
Your overall situation is growing brighter day by day, but the... More for Aquarius

Brandon Bolden ‏@BB_HulkSmash 1 Oct
Storms are growing in intensity today, but the lightning hasn'... More for Aquarius

Brandon Bolden ‏@BB_HulkSmash 30 Sep
Your fantasies are luring you off into the distant future or o... More for Aquarius

Roberto Spiralli, Thursday, 10 October 2013 13:38 (ten years ago) link

one month passes...

Greg Olsen ‏@gregolsen82 1h
Primetime tonight. All eyes on #BlackAndBlue. @TideNFL knows how important they are to our fans. #OurColors #spon

Roberto Spiralli, Sunday, 8 December 2013 21:45 (ten years ago) link

Donovan McNabb ‏@donovanjmcnabb 5m
Is Jason Tucker the best clutch kicker in NFL History?

Roberto Spiralli, Tuesday, 17 December 2013 20:13 (ten years ago) link

two weeks pass...

Wade Phillips ‏@sonofbum 16m
To Texan suite sales-I am sorry,but because of recent changes I will Not renew my purchase of a suite.Hope u understand. Wade Phillips

Roberto Spiralli, Monday, 6 January 2014 12:47 (ten years ago) link

Jordan Peele
Worth the penalty. Get it. @LanceMoore16 @KSTiLLS #WhoDat

Fetchboy, Wednesday, 8 January 2014 23:09 (ten years ago) link

two weeks pass...

Larry Fitzgerald ‏@LarryFitzgerald 19h
If you could ship anything home from #SB48 using @FedEx #OneRate what would it be? I'll tell you what I would do #WhatWouldYouShip #ad

Roberto Spiralli, Tuesday, 28 January 2014 19:34 (ten years ago) link

#ad is a pretty amazing hashtag

PSY talks The Nut Job (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 28 January 2014 19:56 (ten years ago) link

one month passes...

Aaron Rodgers
2 of the 3 guys commenting on this workout right now have opinions that shouldn't be taken very seriously.

Roberto Spiralli, Thursday, 27 March 2014 18:43 (ten years ago) link

Richie Incognito ‏@68INCOGNITO 3h
Everybody else leave a message on my Inc. line 9542990345. #holler #madd #motivator most of all #leaders2014

Roberto Spiralli, Thursday, 27 March 2014 20:29 (ten years ago) link

one month passes...

Baltimore Ravens @Ravens · 2h
Janay Rice says she deeply regrets the role that she played the night of the incident.

Roberto Spiralli, Friday, 23 May 2014 20:46 (ten years ago) link

Ray Rice is going to miss 3 games for beating up his girlfriend. Josh Gordon will miss 16 for smoking pot. Great job, @nfl.

polyphonic, Friday, 23 May 2014 21:47 (ten years ago) link

Tweet @SenatorReid to show your #Redsk1nsPride and tell him what the team means to you.

mookieproof, Thursday, 29 May 2014 19:09 (ten years ago) link

i imagine that was formulated by a senior marketing idiot but actually tweeted by an intern with a shrug and a mental #YOLO

Roberto Spiralli, Thursday, 29 May 2014 21:08 (ten years ago) link

omg <3

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 3 June 2014 17:44 (ten years ago) link

hey whoa yr back

everyone was all "waaaaaaaaaah I miss H4A" the other day. kinda weird that you would be so obliging lol

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 3 June 2014 17:45 (ten years ago) link

yeah dude has been stinking up his twitter feed with embarrassing shit like this ever since

Roberto Spiralli, Tuesday, 3 June 2014 17:45 (ten years ago) link

three weeks pass...

Maj. Max Geron ‏@MaxDPD 51m
#BREAKING CORRECTION - Yaqub Talib 31yrs old was arrested. My apologies to Aqib Talib. Original information reported was incorrect.

Roberto Spiralli, Sunday, 29 June 2014 16:40 (ten years ago) link

one month passes...

tangential but

Roberto Spiralli, Sunday, 10 August 2014 14:36 (nine years ago) link

kinda lol but kinda sad

Johnny Fever, Sunday, 10 August 2014 17:31 (nine years ago) link

Jason La Canfora ‏@JasonLaCanfora 5m
Could be a coincidence, but w/ Raiders about to pull up to Oxnard, they're playing "Trouble" by Taylor Swift at the field here...

Jason La Canfora ‏@JasonLaCanfora 3m
Before you ask, I have a 9yr old daughter, and as Swift songs go, that's actually not bad. And I say that as punk fan w/a son named Strummer

Roberto Spiralli, Wednesday, 13 August 2014 16:43 (nine years ago) link

I'm a punk fan w/a son named Strummer btw

go ahead. make vid where u rap about this new TMNT movie. (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 13 August 2014 16:46 (nine years ago) link

I think naming a baby human being "Strummer" is more embarrassing than listening to Taylor Swift.

Johnny Fever, Wednesday, 13 August 2014 16:59 (nine years ago) link


SEEMS TO ME (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 13 August 2014 17:34 (nine years ago) link

This surname-ification of baby names has got to stop.

polyphonic, Wednesday, 13 August 2014 18:01 (nine years ago) link

this is my baby Schweinsteiger

SEEMS TO ME (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 13 August 2014 18:03 (nine years ago) link

four weeks pass...

Steve Smith Sr ‏@89SteveSmith 17h
"@ProFootballTalk: Panthers paid Steve Smith $3 million to leave instead of $7 million to keep him." actually I received $5 million

Roberto Spiralli, Wednesday, 10 September 2014 17:18 (nine years ago) link

one month passes...

makes u think

mookieproof, Friday, 10 October 2014 18:24 (nine years ago) link

ha beat me to it. i knew he wouldn't disappoint

Roberto Spiralli, Friday, 10 October 2014 18:28 (nine years ago) link

three weeks pass...

The crazy thing is Todd Haley is one of the few coordinators in the NFL who truly loves gangsta rap...

seriously, THIS GUY (daria-g), Monday, 3 November 2014 06:11 (nine years ago) link

three weeks pass...

Jason La Canfora ‏@JasonLaCanfora 12h12 hours ago
Arbeit macht frei

Jason La Canfora ‏@JasonLaCanfora 12h12 hours ago
Last tweet was in regards to a song by The Libertines. "Arbeit Macht Frei" sorry. Had no idea of any negative connotation.

Roberto Spiralli, Thursday, 27 November 2014 13:02 (nine years ago) link

Woooah what a dumbo

i did it all for the 'nuki (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, 27 November 2014 14:41 (nine years ago) link

say what now?

resulting post (rogermexico.), Thursday, 27 November 2014 15:41 (nine years ago) link

a horseface never forgets

Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, 26 September 2016 15:37 (seven years ago) link

three weeks pass...

Spottie, Thursday, 20 October 2016 23:44 (seven years ago) link

solid replies

mookieproof, Tuesday, 25 October 2016 19:21 (seven years ago) link

FREE BRADY (daria-g), Sunday, 6 November 2016 04:15 (seven years ago) link

Spottie, Tuesday, 8 November 2016 20:39 (seven years ago) link

still a penalty but great pic. this also p good:

Roberto Spiralli, Tuesday, 8 November 2016 20:43 (seven years ago) link

three weeks pass...

FREE BRADY (daria-g), Sunday, 4 December 2016 23:26 (seven years ago) link

one month passes...

mookieproof, Monday, 23 January 2017 19:38 (seven years ago) link

he's since deleted his account for some reason. overall, probably for the best.

Roberto Spiralli, Monday, 23 January 2017 23:06 (seven years ago) link

jerry glanville ftw

mookieproof, Monday, 6 February 2017 17:09 (seven years ago) link

thx I needed that today

Brad C., Monday, 6 February 2017 20:15 (seven years ago) link

tweet has gone but yeah matt patricia

Roberto Spiralli, Monday, 6 February 2017 23:54 (seven years ago) link

that glanville story is so good

call all destroyer, Tuesday, 7 February 2017 00:36 (seven years ago) link

omg that glanville story is perfection

Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 00:54 (seven years ago) link

two months pass...

Spottie, Wednesday, 26 April 2017 17:55 (seven years ago) link


when life gives you lemons & sends yr team to vegas, make lemonade by signing beastmode & give VG some temporary happiness

Yoni Loves Chocha (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 27 April 2017 04:31 (seven years ago) link

Roberto Spiralli, Sunday, 30 April 2017 17:59 (seven years ago) link

.@Reince exiting gop cloakroom tells me: "The president stepped up and helped punt the ball into the end zone."

— Molly Hooper (@mollyhooper) May 4, 2017

mookieproof, Thursday, 4 May 2017 19:00 (seven years ago) link


Roberto Spiralli, Thursday, 4 May 2017 19:47 (seven years ago) link

three weeks pass...


— Pat McAfee (@PatMcAfeeShow) May 24, 2017

Roberto Spiralli, Thursday, 25 May 2017 15:23 (seven years ago) link

two months pass...

"Hot takes are the easier, lazier way to cover sports"

— Carolina Panthers (@Panthers) July 29, 2017

Spottie, Saturday, 29 July 2017 06:20 (six years ago) link

two months pass...

Happy Birthday to the best mom I could ever ask for.

— JJ Watt (@JJWatt) October 1, 2017

Roberto Spiralli, Sunday, 1 October 2017 16:22 (six years ago) link

essential 80’s moms

Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Sunday, 1 October 2017 17:23 (six years ago) link

that baby looks half her size

Chocolate-covered gummy bears? Not ruling those lil' guys out. (ulysses), Monday, 2 October 2017 15:04 (six years ago) link

A mysterious tweeter has been defending NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell. It’s his wife!

— WSJ Sports (@WSJSports) October 12, 2017

mookieproof, Thursday, 12 October 2017 20:26 (six years ago) link


call all destroyer, Thursday, 12 October 2017 20:30 (six years ago) link


Roberto Spiralli, Thursday, 12 October 2017 20:47 (six years ago) link

Rob Ryan looks like Gandalf went undercover to bust a cocaine smuggling ring in Miami in 1986.

— Mike Beauvais (@MikeBeauvais) October 19, 2017

Roberto Spiralli, Thursday, 19 October 2017 18:40 (six years ago) link

holy shit

Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 19 October 2017 18:53 (six years ago) link

one month passes...

Roberto Spiralli, Monday, 20 November 2017 15:34 (six years ago) link

what NFL team do Trump own ? oh yeah they wouldnt let him have one ,!! LMAO

— Delisa Lynch (@MommaLynch24) November 20, 2017

¯\_(🏈 )_/¯ (daria-g), Tuesday, 21 November 2017 03:31 (six years ago) link


Roberto Spiralli, Tuesday, 21 November 2017 03:52 (six years ago) link

Aqib Talib be having my mentions FUCKED UP lol

— Talib Kweli Greene (@TalibKweli) November 28, 2017

Roberto Spiralli, Tuesday, 28 November 2017 19:32 (six years ago) link

"Cam can show you the world"

— Carolina Panthers (@Panthers) December 10, 2017

¯\_(🏈 )_/¯ (daria-g), Monday, 11 December 2017 02:59 (six years ago) link

this guy

Roberto Spiralli, Monday, 11 December 2017 03:12 (six years ago) link

three weeks pass...

— Tennessee Titans (@Titans) January 7, 2018

¯\_(🏈 )_/¯ (daria-g), Sunday, 7 January 2018 17:31 (six years ago) link

Then again he picked me ahead of Peyton too, just sayin!!

— Ryan D Leaf (@RyanDLeaf) January 18, 2018

Roberto Spiralli, Friday, 19 January 2018 00:59 (six years ago) link

lmao that's amazing

Larry Elleison (rogermexico.), Friday, 19 January 2018 04:54 (six years ago) link

two weeks pass...

Somebody please explain how asparagus does it. And you know what I mean by “it”.

— Case Keenum (@casekeenum7) February 3, 2018

Roberto Spiralli, Saturday, 3 February 2018 15:51 (six years ago) link

three weeks pass...

Because I’m a former three-year football letterman who is still hailed as a legend some 20 years later when I attend field parties in my letter jacket, so I know a fraud under center when I see one, and that’s Andy Dalton.

— Three Year Letterman (@3YearLetterman) March 1, 2018

Roberto Spiralli, Thursday, 1 March 2018 18:34 (six years ago) link

this is so classic. i should be upset but man the eagles are a fun team and i <3 chris long and legarrette blount

Parade ready

— Chris Long (@JOEL9ONE) February 8, 2018

¯\_(🏈 )_/¯ (daria-g), Sunday, 4 March 2018 19:22 (six years ago) link

two months pass...

Thanks to @jordanbpeterson for speaking to our staff and enlightening us today!

— Pete Carroll (@PeteCarroll) May 10, 2018

Roberto Spiralli, Friday, 11 May 2018 01:53 (six years ago) link

six months pass...

Q: #AskStephenA You think Russell Wilson is overrated?
- @JohnAtMcGee


— Stephen A Smith (@stephenasmith) November 27, 2018

whole thread has a lot of wisdom

Roberto Spiralli, Tuesday, 27 November 2018 23:33 (five years ago) link

mookieproof, Wednesday, 28 November 2018 00:01 (five years ago) link

three years pass...

The Chicago bears accidentally making an inflammatory, sectarian statement about Irish politics is maybe the funniest NFL team post since the Raiders Derek Chauvin post.

— Combo (@thiccgenius) March 17, 2022

mookieproof, Thursday, 17 March 2022 17:13 (two years ago) link

eleven months pass...

My college roommate stole my girlfriend while we were roommates, had her move in with us and is now married to her with 2 kids…. And we are still friends. Why? Because the bonds you make coaching football are greater than the women who try to break them! Good luck today Petey…

— Coach Tom Yashinsky (@TYash42) March 11, 2023

mookieproof, Saturday, 11 March 2023 18:21 (one year ago) link

two months pass...

This is one of the best things I have ever seen:

should we REALLY make our schedule release video an anime AGAIN?

yes yes yesyes
yesyes yes yes yes
yes yes yes yes yes
yes yesyes yes yes
yes yesye yes yes
yes yes yesyes

— Los Angeles Chargers (@chargers) May 12, 2023

Bee OK, Friday, 12 May 2023 06:14 (one year ago) link

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