stalker online: weird-ass shitpile eastern euro mmo

http://i.imgur.com/kWhsj.jpg

me and my gamin broskies have been playin this

its basically a game equivalent of that joke in borat where he says #1 sport in his country is everyone gathers in big field and shoots a dog

some russian guy walks up to you, holds you up at gun point, and forces you to join his clan. they make you join russian equivalent of vent and you get in there and everyone's speaking high speed russian with their moms screaming in background and laughing at you whenever you say anything in english

http://i.imgur.com/87cPb.png

entire game client in cyrillic, almost none of the russian players speak english, but some of the hungarians do, and they'll help you out

the russians call any english speaker 'pindos':

http://www.languagehat.com/archives/002639.php

you run around shooting dogs and cutting off their heads to sell for rubles, and you're always just barely scraping by

it's not an official stalker license at all yet it uses a F2P cash shop (not a vital component of the game, people mostly just buy stupid camos with it from what i can tell)

you can shoot any other player outside the starting Hub, and most nrussians just want to gun you down. getting out of the hub is the game's big speedbump, your there and its full of guys in high powered equipment shooting the shit out of dogs with rifles and you hear dogs wailing constantly and gunshot, but once you get past it its cool

the dude on the left "MyaMap" came onto the turf i was grinding on and started talking to me:

http://i.imgur.com/xd0E2.jpg

when he demanded what I can only assume is money, I had to kill him

http://i.imgur.com/9WBq1.jpg

then he "whispered" something to me(the text in red) and it can only be a curse

http://i.imgur.com/afbrv.jpg

you have to make friends with tiny number of english speakers and stick together to survive The Zone. the maps are incredibly huge and there's a lot of exploration and discovery

sometimes you run into really cool english speaking russians who scream 420!!!!! when they see your name and talk about how much they hate the world

http://i.imgur.com/2aNU5.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/m1Yig.png

if you want to try something different and cool google stalker online, download the game client (~3 gig install), then sign up for an account on the forum, then when you're account is active then activate your game account within your forum account. you have to do all of this on the russian site, it doesnt work on english site

you cant really add 'buddies' in the game but i play with the name PindosScumbag (and a few others) and we can stalk together if u want

XD

lol at 'Geave mi mani' - I hope you took MyaMap's sweet looking sniper rifle

ive been temporarily banned for having a char named FuckRussia

wow. this sounds crazy.

brilliant

awesome

i was about to ask what you "do" but i don't really get mmos

its been explained, u kill dogs

i mean other than kill people who maybe ask you for mani

and dogs

but what do the dogs kill??

in soviet russia dogs kill u lolololol

postsoviet russia dawg

at last a true to life poverty/organized crime simulator

the zone is def in soviet know yr tarkovsky dawg

im not in the zone

this looks incredible

omg

i was about to ask what you "do" but i don't really get mmos

― Critique of Pure Moods (goole), Saturday, February 4, 2012 8:00 PM (21 minutes ago) Bookmark

a lot of it is exploration in huge, dangerous environments. at first it doesnt really have Stalkerfeel cuz you're surrounded by so many people, but once you get out in the zone with just a handful of your buds, looking for abandoned buildings to loot and increasingly large dogs to kill for their increasingly large heads, and you're getting irradiated and avoiding anomalies and other players who might PK you at the drop of a dime, it's actually pretty harrowing and creepy

there are quests but you're not completing them unless you speak russian. there's a few quests in the starting area you can figure out, kill 3 rats type stuff, but after that good luck

as a game it's a pile of shit, to be honest, but also faintly compelling

the english language client is supposed to be coming in the next month or so but we'll see

i think this is the only STALKER thread, which is funny

tarkovsky's stalker

wow

i mean the real S.T.A.L.K.E.R.~

pretty sure this post is closer to what games journalism should be than what is called games journalism right now

the first post is really great. i have no idea why yr actually playing this however, but im glad you did.

holy shit this sounds amazing

(not the game which sounds really weird, but your experience in it)

credit has to go to my buddy bonerguy for some of these pics & descriptions, he also discovered the game in the first place, i dont even know how

*how he found it

kind of knew this was gonna be a cankles thread

I mean maybe he just googled stalker mmo and found it? I mean we all go to google and type in our wishes sometimes

also I cracked up because when the screenshot russian guy said "How in general have you found this game" I knew he was asking whether you like the game, not how it was located

people who do not speak English as a primary language really do tend to phrase things in certain ways

should voted for this coint and plick imo

clearly you need to accept a last minute ballot from B O N E R G U Y forks

coint and plick 2012

i will totally play this fucking game if i can make it work btw, this could be my deadly premonition mmo experience

there is no way this is mac compatible who am i kidding

goddamnit someone sell me a 7 year old netbook so i can pwn these russian fools

http://i.imgur.com/bxm24.jpg

why do people tlak abt "mac compatible" in a post-bootcamp world i wonder (my macbook recently exploded tho so i can't actually check if you cna use bootcamp to do, uh, anything)

cos us mac users are massive ninnies who find booting into PC mode still a massive hardship

fack beatches get mani

lol

this thread is so scifi, i love it

i love the idea that everyone is just scraping by haha

like that is such a russian thing

"You'll believe a man can shoot a dog"

i love the idea that everyone is just scraping by haha

― the jazz zinger (s1ocki), Sunday, February 5, 2012 12:05 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

like that is such a russian thing

― the jazz zinger (s1ocki), Sunday, February 5, 2012 12:05 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark

i was reading the english forums and a polish guy was complaining that he's too poor for the planned P2P move, and some eastern european guy butts in like YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT POOR??? and a big argument ensued

haha ya, the idea though that they're all super-poor in the game though... you can't make that up, its so out of a cyberpunk novel

wish i could join the ilxor resistance but i'm also an osx prole. keep me updated on the game though, the op was hilarious

i wish i played video games because this sounds awesome

weird internet video game subcultures are pretty much the best thing

After glancing at the first pic and reading the thread title, I assumed this was a MMO adaptation of the Tarkovsky movie Stalker.

there seems to be some connecksh no?

about the original game this mmo thing is inspired by:

The background and some terminology of the game ("The Zone", "Stalker") is borrowed from the popular science fiction novella Roadside Picnic by Boris and Arkady Strugatsky and the 1979 Andrei Tarkovsky film Stalker that was loosely based on it, as well as Stalker, the film's subsequent novelization by the original authors.

that's what i figured

they should have called it roadside picnic tho imo

as well as Stalker, the film's subsequent novelization by the original authors.

oh, i didn't now this was a thing?

me neither!

have you guys not played S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl? its easily the best game of the last 5 years

geave mi mani

how's this goin?

geave mi mani

ive been temporarily banned for having a char named FuckRussia

― Assmaster (Hungry4Ass), Saturday, February 4, 2012 7:18 PM (3 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

thx for the revive this is good

I think of this thread, often

looks like there’s a version of this on steam now?

https://store.steampowered.com/app/1180380/Stay_Out/

EARLY ACCESS REVIEW POSTED: JUNE 12
this is to most ♥♥♥♥ game I have ever played, I just wasted 2 hours of my life. I want a refund 2 hours back to my life. I am gonna go and take a quick one and letting the anger out.

EARLY ACCESS REVIEW POSTED: JUNE 12
bear killed me in the sea

"increasingly large dogs to kill for their increasingly large heads"

i can't believe i never saw this thread before!

"The Hungarians will help you out" is my favourite gaming tip ever.

"Geave mi mani" is part of our permanent household vocabulary now and has been for a few years. It's what my son says any time I ask him to pop to the shop for us.

i figure cankles just transferred his entire digital life here instead

"Geave mi mani" is part of our permanent household vocabulary now and has been for a few years. It's what my son says any time I ask him to pop to the shop for us.

I have a friend who was really into playing Escape from Tarkov a couple years ago. I was trying to figure out if it was related to this thread in any way and I couldn’t think of a question to ask other than “do you have to kill dogs of increasing size?”

loool. one of my favourite ilx threads.

^