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Explain to me this whole "Kingdom Hearts" thing

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Also, if you don't like twee, you're not going to like this. What the fuck did you expect?

I'm all for twee, but the writing/gameplay for the game did absolutely nothing for me.

― polyphonic (polyphonic), Monday, 21 November 2005 08:02 (twenty years ago)

KH strikes me as being not so much twee as borderline Furry.

― THIS IS THE SOUND OF ALTERN 8 !!! (noodle vague), Monday, 21 November 2005 10:33 (twenty years ago)

I refuse to even try this game on principle. I mean, COME ON:

http://littleaeyaoki0.tripod.com/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/245745.jpg

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 21 November 2005 22:32 (twenty years ago)

Ugh. Tripod.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 21 November 2005 22:32 (twenty years ago)

one month passes...
HEY!
HOW DARE YOU.
I THINK U R ALL WRONG.
KINGDOM HEARTS IS GOOD.
EVERYTHIN ABOUT IT WAS GREAT. (TO ME)

BUT WAT ON EARTH IS "TRIPOD" IVE NEVER HERD OF IT SO THAT "TRIPOD"
THING MUST BE CRAP.

SO YEA
I LIKED KH


― **//** FaRmEr Fi **//**, Monday, 9 January 2006 22:19 (twenty years ago)

judymagic_9000, you are a TREAT

― Dan (ROFFLES) Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 9 January 2006 22:30 (twenty years ago)

hahaha

― s1ocki (slutsky), Monday, 9 January 2006 22:30 (twenty years ago)

hey waz that supposed to mean

i don even nowat u mean by callin me a "TREAT"

and someones laufin who is it

have u got harry potter and the goblet of fire

its shit

fi

― **//**FaRmEr Fi**//**, Tuesday, 10 January 2006 02:51 (twenty years ago)

laufin -> http://www.gamansaman.is/profile.php?ID=1304

― kingfish pibb Xtra (kingfish 2.0), Tuesday, 10 January 2006 03:54 (twenty years ago)

hi! I'm Anohsir.i thing k.h is the best vidio game. but i hate everyones shoes in it they are shitty and ugly. i am related to FI and harry potter and the goblet of fire game is shit, the other ones are good.I hate that dumb girl with that skiping rope.Alice is not a princess but its so stupid she one of them traped at the end.Leon is looks gay with all those belts. i have more insults to say bu my hands hurt. BYE!

― ANOHSIR, Tuesday, 10 January 2006 05:39 (twenty years ago)

Did gamefaqs.com crash or something?

― disco violence (disco violence), Tuesday, 10 January 2006 05:57 (twenty years ago)

we can only hope

― kingfish pibb Xtra (kingfish 2.0), Tuesday, 10 January 2006 06:33 (twenty years ago)

Nah, it's all the same unfunny person.

― Laura H. (laurah), Tuesday, 10 January 2006 13:39 (twenty years ago)

Come on, Laura, the two posts from judymagic_9000 are funny!

― Dan ("its shit" Haha Awesome) Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 10 January 2006 14:37 (twenty years ago)

eh.

― Laura H. (laurah), Tuesday, 10 January 2006 14:46 (twenty years ago)

i thought kingdom hearts was fun. it wasn't like "OMGWTF this game is teh roxxorz" or anything. but it was fun. looking forward to the 2nd one.

― Christopher Costello (CGC), Tuesday, 10 January 2006 22:56 (twenty years ago)

KH is ok. it's not bad per say, it's just not a lot of fun for me. i never got past more than one of the worlds.

― The Legend of Tony Balls (Adrian Langston), Wednesday, 11 January 2006 10:48 (twenty years ago)

It think it says a lot that I, a dude who has no objections to the ridiculously International Male fashion sense on display in Square and Enix classics right on up through Final Fantasy Tactics Advance (where you get to be this fuckin' doofus) had not the patience to even crack open KH after borrowing it from a coworker's younger brother to see what all the fuss was about. One look at the screenshots and I knew I didn't have the patience.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 11 January 2006 17:29 (twenty years ago)

Is he brandishing a translucent upright bass, there?

― Laura H. (laurah), Wednesday, 11 January 2006 18:33 (twenty years ago)

Yeah Tom, but isn't it just the case that for sufficiently low-rez games you don't have to pay attention to the concept art that much, EG if they made a full-polygon sequel which allowed you to see him wandering around looking like that, you'd decry that as well?

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 11 January 2006 19:35 (twenty years ago)

THAT'S A GUY?

― Dan (Japan Is Odd) Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 11 January 2006 19:44 (twenty years ago)

Seriously, it looks like someone said "I'VE GOT IT! Dakota Fanning's head + Calista Flockhart's torso and legs + Alizee's ass = TEH PERFECTO MALE PROTAGONIST OMG DANCE PARTY TIME"

― Dan (Cuffed Booty Shorts???) Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 11 January 2006 19:46 (twenty years ago)

Well yes but you still have to look at his poncey face every time there's dialogue. KH (Sora?) is more precocious and glassy-eyed than even that, though, which beggars the imagination.

xxpost to the low-rez issue.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 11 January 2006 19:51 (twenty years ago)

Dan you really should take a look at the concept art for the characters/job classes in both FF Tactics games, they'll blow your mind. You know the character designs for Lynch's Dune? "better."

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 11 January 2006 19:55 (twenty years ago)

Who did the designs for FFTA?

...okay, IMDB has Nomura as designing both KH games, and Yoshida doing FFTA and FFXII.


Hang on, there was a Parasite Eve 2?! Did it ever make it over here?

― kingfish russian bigamist (kingfish 2.0), Wednesday, 11 January 2006 20:07 (twenty years ago)

bare midriffs for all!

see also

― kingfish russian bigamist (kingfish 2.0), Wednesday, 11 January 2006 20:13 (twenty years ago)

Should we just do a thread of the most asinine character designs in games of the last 20 years(and the cover for Mega Man II does count)?

― kingfish russian bigamist (kingfish 2.0), Wednesday, 11 January 2006 20:16 (twenty years ago)

http://www.ffuniverse.nu/ffta/img/02.jpghttp://www.ffuniverse.nu/ffta/img/03.jpghttp://www.ffuniverse.nu/ffta/img/04.jpg

― Dan (WTF) Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 11 January 2006 20:49 (twenty years ago)

ok

my name is not judymagic_9000 its farmer fi but ma real name is judith (I AM A GIRL IF U DONT NO BRO)

WTF THE PICTURES ABOVE LOOK STRANGE AND SCARY

anohsir is ma little sister and she hates absolutely hates all the ppls shoes

i hate peter pans shoes they look like paper bags the only decent shoes that make sense would have to be sora's shoes their still ugly but not badas the other ppls shoes


rishona LEON IS NOT GAY waz messin wit ur mind dudet
ur 1 strange sister u no that


judith

― **//**FaRmEr Fi**//**, Wednesday, 11 January 2006 22:33 (twenty years ago)

http://www.ffuniverse.nu/ffta/img/04.jpg

Someone better tell me what the fuck this thing is right now.

― Dan (KILL IT) Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 11 January 2006 22:39 (twenty years ago)

OH WAIT I FORGOT TO ADD SOME THINGS

GOOFBALL IS A COMPLETE IDIOT(GOOFY) HE IS SO STUPID
1CE WE WERE FLYIN AROUND THE CLOCK TOWER AND HE JUST FELL OUT OF THE SKY
I STARTED LAUFIN
IT WAS SOOOOO FUNNY CAUSE HES AN IDIOT AND THAT IS WAT IS EXPECTED FROM HIM

AND

I HATE WINNIE THE POOH
MAN HE SHITS HERE HE SHITS THERE

HIS WORLD WAS CRAP

IT SAID HIT INSTEAD OF ATTACK

PIG ABSOLUTE PIG THAT POOH BEAR IS.


THAZ ALL FOR NOW THOUGH

JUDITH

― **//**FaRmEr Fi**//**, Wednesday, 11 January 2006 22:44 (twenty years ago)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moogle

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 11 January 2006 22:45 (twenty years ago)

hey i dont no WTF that picture is

― **//**FaRmEr Fi**//**, Wednesday, 11 January 2006 22:46 (twenty years ago)

Y'see, this is why I (mostly) won't de-index threads

― kingfish russian bigamist (kingfish 2.0), Wednesday, 11 January 2006 22:47 (twenty years ago)

who is tombot??

― **//**Farmer Fi**//**, Wednesday, 11 January 2006 22:48 (twenty years ago)

OMG Cait Sith

― Dan (Woefully Missing From "Revenge Of The Sith") Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 11 January 2006 22:51 (twenty years ago)

r other ppl posting thingys now??

― **//**FaRmEr Fi**//**, Wednesday, 11 January 2006 22:52 (twenty years ago)

ok the stupid piture is a moogle i hate them

― **//**FaRmEr Fi**//**, Wednesday, 11 January 2006 22:54 (twenty years ago)

this all sucks

― blam, Thursday, 12 January 2006 04:56 (twenty years ago)

tell us more

― kingfish russian bigamist (kingfish 2.0), Thursday, 12 January 2006 05:31 (twenty years ago)

or don't

― Laura H. (laurah), Thursday, 12 January 2006 05:50 (twenty years ago)

they're not exactly wrong, y'know

― The Legend of Tony Balls (Adrian Langston), Thursday, 12 January 2006 05:55 (twenty years ago)

KH has been recommended to me a lot, but I can never muster any interest in it at all.

Dan you really should take a look at the concept art for the characters/job classes in both FF Tactics games, they'll blow your mind. You know the character designs for Lynch's Dune? "better."
-- TOMBOT

I... actually really liked the character art in FFT. Even if it is a bit Precious Moments and everyone looks like they're 12. But seriously what did they do to the moogles in FFTA?

― sleep (sleep), Thursday, 12 January 2006 17:16 (twenty years ago)

Professionalized them

― TOMBOT, Thursday, 12 January 2006 21:26 (twenty years ago)

have any shots of the Tron stuff leaked yet?

― kingfish russian bigamist (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 13 January 2006 04:17 (twenty years ago)

http://www.treasurekingdom.com/miva/graphics/00000001/donaldtron33.jpg

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Friday, 13 January 2006 05:05 (twenty years ago)

the fuck is that? A Shrinky-Dink?

― kingfish russian bigamist (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 13 January 2006 05:09 (twenty years ago)

I think it's a cloisonne pin.

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Friday, 13 January 2006 05:16 (twenty years ago)

ok NO.1

i did not write

"this all sucks"

WTF HAS HAPPENED TO DONALD

I LIKE DONALD BUT THIS PICTURE IS JUST BAD OK JUST BAD

ITS FREAKY CAUSE YESTERDAY WHEN I HAD KILLED THE PHANTOM IN NEVERLAND AND I WENT TO TALK TO MERLIN IN TRAVERSE TOWN HE GAVE DONALD THE "DREAM ROD" THAT WAS THE 1 IN SORAS DREAM BAC IN DESTINY ISLANDS.

FREAK SHOW!!!!!!!!!!

i totally like freaked out

i mean i should have got another key cause donald didnt even fight and i did most of the work.

goofy is so stupid

but i like the game

FI

PPL DONT USE MA EMAIL ADDRESS ON UR THINGS THAT U R WRITING IM SERIOUS OK CAUSE I WOULD NEVER SAY THINGS THAT U PPL SAY BOUT IT .

― **//**FaRmEr Fi**//**, Friday, 13 January 2006 20:53 (twenty years ago)

Try not to use your caps lock so much; it rattles the ears.

― kingfish kuribo's shoe (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 13 January 2006 20:55 (twenty years ago)

Skipping 66 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.
http://static.flickr.com/1/1182461_f2fb1e2ebe_m.jpg

― JimD (JimD), Tuesday, 18 April 2006 01:27 (twenty years ago)

wtf is that
oh its pooh

fugly just fugly

whoa who put this kool background on

i mean i hav to put up with pooh every time i play that game i dont deserve to be puttin up with him now
how come thats a girl
it is a girl isnt it?

― **//**FaRmEr Fi**//** (FaRmEr Fi), Tuesday, 18 April 2006 03:47 (twenty years ago)

so via channel flipping I discovered that Haley Joel Osment did the voice for Sora in this series, and also then from IMDB that he has basically done nothing BUT voiceover work since A.I. (a good thing) (also he is tall and hanson-looking now, wtf why do I have to be saddled with such information while I'm failing Systems Engineering I)

― TOMBOT (TOMBOT), Tuesday, 18 April 2006 13:06 (twenty years ago)

And apparently Lance Bass was the voice of Sephiroth?!

http://www.photo-celebrity.com/albums/L/lancebass/normal_1.jpg

― Laura H. (laurah), Tuesday, 18 April 2006 13:32 (twenty years ago)

rofl

― sleep (sleep), Tuesday, 18 April 2006 21:40 (twenty years ago)

yeah didnt u know that sora was as Haley Joel Osment ?
the sixth sense is like the best movie ever i would never get tired of it
who is that in the picture???
like i played kh all day then i decided to play another but the other games i had were shit and boring so i went back to kh
ill never get tired off it

― **//**FaRmEr Fi**//** (FaRmEr Fi), Wednesday, 19 April 2006 05:45 (twenty years ago)

http://xs77.xs.to/pics/06163/animated-KH2.gif

ugh, i made the mistake of reading the slashdot article today

― JW (ex machina), Sunday, 30 April 2006 20:47 (twenty years ago)

wtf

― **//**FaRmEr Fi**//** (FaRmEr Fi), Monday, 1 May 2006 06:38 (twenty years ago)

i heard kh2 is comming out in november in australia
is it true?
cause i cant wait that long

― **//**FaRmEr Fi**//** (FaRmEr Fi), Monday, 1 May 2006 06:41 (twenty years ago)

No, they're not releasing it there.

― JW (ex machina), Monday, 1 May 2006 14:58 (twenty years ago)

WHAT!!!!!!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OVER MY DEAD BOODY THEY ARNT
ill never get it then
r u sure?

― **//**FaRmEr Fi**//** (FaRmEr Fi), Monday, 8 May 2006 07:03 (twenty years ago)

eight months pass...
This is the worst game I have ever played. Fact. Fucking gamespot and they're recommendations. I was coming home from work, picked up a PS2 to replace the old lump and this was recommended as being similar to I "heart" Katamri Damacy. The story, the controls, the insufferable background music THAT I CAN'T TURN OFF... It's just shit. At least now I can play Vice City.

― Kv_nol (Kv_nol), Tuesday, 16 January 2007 15:58 (nineteen years ago)

lol

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 16 January 2007 18:08 (nineteen years ago)

I'm glad I'm not the only person who hates it.

― polyphonic (polyphonic), Tuesday, 16 January 2007 19:25 (nineteen years ago)

Lance Bass was the voice of Sephiroth

hahaha I don't know why but this is the best fact basically ever.

― baron kickass von awesomehausen (nickalicious), Tuesday, 16 January 2007 20:07 (nineteen years ago)

is it really, dude?

― s1ocki (slutsky), Tuesday, 16 January 2007 20:29 (nineteen years ago)

lolz

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 16 January 2007 21:17 (nineteen years ago)

I want it that way.

― baron kickass von awesomehausen (nickalicious), Tuesday, 16 January 2007 21:30 (nineteen years ago)

WRONG GROUP SPANKY

― David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 16 January 2007 22:18 (nineteen years ago)

OKAY I HEREBY DECREE THAT, FROM THIS POST FORWARD, THE WORDS "Lance Bass" and "GROUP SPANKY" SHALL NEVER AGAIN APPEAR IN SUCH CLOSE PROXIMITY

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 16 January 2007 22:23 (nineteen years ago)

lolz

― webber (webber), Wednesday, 17 January 2007 01:21 (nineteen years ago)

Sephiroth can lance my bass anyday. rowr.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Wednesday, 17 January 2007 04:01 (nineteen years ago)

Just to get back to the main topic a bit here, guys, the "Kingdom Hearts thing" is easy to explain. It's 1 part furries, 1 part disney, 1 part anime, all parts perverted. This is a hentai game, whether u realize it or not. If you think this is game is good for children, you are wrong because it will merely encourage them to develop a furry fetish.


Sorry for that sad taste of reality.

― Blastochrist (blastocyst), Wednesday, 17 January 2007 08:34 (nineteen years ago)

That is so frighteningly OTM.

I got home last night and thought: "Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I was just too tired." Thankfully I caught myself in time and spent the next hour or so learning where the armor and weapons are in the first part of Vice City. So much more satisfying. Fuck a perverted, woodwind fuelled anime gloop-fest! I mean come on: "Who knows how long we'll have together [before your parents come home]..."*

Also:
they're recommendations

Cringe x 1,000

*This might not be in the game...

― Kv_nol (Kv_nol), Wednesday, 17 January 2007 09:11 (nineteen years ago)

lulz

― SEACREST OUT OF IRAQ! (Adrian Langston), Wednesday, 17 January 2007 09:32 (nineteen years ago)

hahaha I just reread this whole thread

"I AM CURIOUS (TWEE)"

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 17 January 2007 14:40 (nineteen years ago)

that one's for the ages

― latebloomer aka freedom williams sr (latebloomer), Wednesday, 17 January 2007 16:29 (nineteen years ago)

four years pass...

i thing k.h is the best vidio game. but i hate everyones shoes in it they are shitty and ugly.

― Stop Non-Erotic Cabaret (Abbbottt), Sunday, 23 January 2011 16:16 (fifteen years ago)

i never beat this game... perhaps... i never will...

― David Warner (Princess TamTam), Sunday, 23 January 2011 16:34 (fifteen years ago)

This has a few laughs: Kingdom Hearts: The Short and Honest Version

― Crazed Mister Handy (kingfish), Monday, 24 January 2011 01:01 (fifteen years ago)

Lance Bass was the voice of Sephiroth

hahaha I don't know why but this is the best fact basically ever.

― baron kickass von awesomehausen (nickalicious), Tuesday, January 16, 2007 1:07 PM (4 years ago)

― Stop Non-Erotic Cabaret (Abbbottt), Monday, 24 January 2011 02:30 (fifteen years ago)

haley joel osment was the protagonist iirc

― marios balls in 3d for 3ds (Princess TamTam), Monday, 24 January 2011 02:30 (fifteen years ago)

I looked it up, and you're not "secondhand lion" (lying) (HJO career!).

― Stop Non-Erotic Cabaret (Abbbottt), Monday, 24 January 2011 02:31 (fifteen years ago)

lmao thats probably the first ever secondhand lion pun in world history

― marios balls in 3d for 3ds (Princess TamTam), Monday, 24 January 2011 02:32 (fifteen years ago)

i... own that on dvd btw

― marios balls in 3d for 3ds (Princess TamTam), Monday, 24 January 2011 02:32 (fifteen years ago)

eight years pass...

kingdom hearts 3 it's so good

― adam, Monday, 4 February 2019 19:02 (seven years ago)

"Kingdom Hearts was awful. Plodding and dull with crappy controls. I can't imagine the new one will be any better.

― adam (adam), Saturday, November 19, 2005 7:12 PM (thirteen years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink"

this is a wrong opinion

― adam, Monday, 4 February 2019 19:02 (seven years ago)

sora has a phone now and all the loading screens are like instagram posts from various characters

― adam, Tuesday, 5 February 2019 16:31 (seven years ago)

I'm a sucker for Donkey, Has this been posted?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8o1ieehttdA

― Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 6 February 2019 01:06 (seven years ago)

p accurate summary actually

― ciderpress, Wednesday, 6 February 2019 01:12 (seven years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7LFCNyY4loE

― Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Friday, 8 February 2019 19:56 (seven years ago)

Heh:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LMph2hAGj7k

― Josh in Chicago, Thursday, 14 February 2019 04:40 (seven years ago)


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