The Random Recipe Generator

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http://jamesoff.net/site/fun/random-recipe-generator/

This thing is awesome.

sedentary lacrimation (Abbott), Friday, 15 January 2010 22:02 (eleven years ago) link

Nice. After a few of those maybe you'll want to build up a menu: http://www.deliciouscorpse.com/

canna kirk (a passing spacecadet), Friday, 15 January 2010 22:05 (eleven years ago) link

ahhaha

you have to forgive me (surm), Friday, 15 January 2010 22:06 (eleven years ago) link

Grilled Lemon Juice
Serves 3
You will need:

* 10ml lemon juice
* 4 bananas
* 70g ginger
* 2 mangoes

Instructions:

1. fry the lemon juice until browned
2. barbeque the mangoes
3. fry the ginger
4. whisk the lemon juice
5. fold in the mangoes
6. barbeque the bananas
7. enjoy

sedentary lacrimation (Abbott), Friday, 15 January 2010 22:09 (eleven years ago) link

The best part of each one is the instructions.

sedentary lacrimation (Abbott), Friday, 15 January 2010 22:09 (eleven years ago) link

I just got a recipe for Grilled Lemons where the last two stages were 4. discard the lemons and 5. order out, which is exactly my cooking procedure for most dishes

spooky grilled lemon xpost!

canna kirk (a passing spacecadet), Friday, 15 January 2010 22:11 (eleven years ago) link

this made me lol for real

Pizza Style Green Peppers
Serves 2
You will need:

* 3 pinches of salt
* 90ml lemonade
* 20g chicken
* 1 green peppers

Instructions:

1. pre-heat the oven to 220 C
2. rinse the lemonade
3. fry the green peppers
4. add one tablespoon of the green peppers
5. stir the lemonade
6. throw the green peppers away
7. sift the chicken
8. grind the chicken
9. sprinkle the lemonade over the top
10. throw the pinches of salt away
11. bake for 90 minutes and serve hot

figgy pudding (La Lechera), Friday, 15 January 2010 22:11 (eleven years ago) link

lol

rinse the lemonade (Jordan), Friday, 15 January 2010 22:14 (eleven years ago) link

Potatoes Supreme
Serves 1
You will need:

* 70ml vinegar
* 2 potatoes
* 70ml mint sauce

Instructions:

1. microwave the vinegar
2. rinse the mint sauce
3. simmer the vinegar gently for 20 minutes
4. throw the potatoes away
5. serve piping hot

Yum.

rinse the lemonade (Jordan), Friday, 15 January 2010 22:19 (eleven years ago) link

Slices of Bread Salsa
Serves 2
You will need:

* 80g of sprouts
* 6 slices of bread
* 120g self-raising flour

Instructions:

1. pre-heat the oven to 200 C
2. sift the sprouts
3. rinse the slices of bread
4. put the self-raising flour in the fridge for 2 minutes
5. bake for 90 minutes and serve hot

This is actually how we make salsa in the UK.

canna kirk (a passing spacecadet), Friday, 15 January 2010 22:39 (eleven years ago) link

i would like it if it actually made more sense

fleetwood (s1ocki), Friday, 15 January 2010 23:14 (eleven years ago) link

like, you could make it more sophisticated to make it seem even more realer

fleetwood (s1ocki), Friday, 15 January 2010 23:14 (eleven years ago) link

nah i am loving the surrealist lols here

Pizza Style Plain Flour
Serves 2
You will need:

* 120ml soy sauce
* 1 sprigs of asparagus
* 70g noodles
* 100ml whipped cream
* 110g plain flour

Instructions:

1. fry the sprigs of asparagus until browned
2. lightly fry the sprigs of asparagus
3. heat the sprigs of asparagus in the saucepan
4. mix the sprigs of asparagus in
5. add one tablespoon of the sprigs of asparagus
6. rinse the soy sauce
7. simmer the soy sauce gently for 20 minutes
8. slice the noodles
9. microwave the soy sauce
10. eat the noodles
11. add one tablespoon of the soy sauce
12. eat the whipped cream
13. discard the soy sauce
14. microwave the plain flour
15. enjoy

CATBEAST 7777 (ledge), Friday, 15 January 2010 23:15 (eleven years ago) link

srsly i am losing my shit here

CATBEAST 7777 (ledge), Friday, 15 January 2010 23:16 (eleven years ago) link

i love the "discard the ______" part

this has made me larf
thank you james off

figgy pudding (La Lechera), Friday, 15 January 2010 23:22 (eleven years ago) link

hahahahahaha these recipes are a scream

i should rectify that (jdchurchill), Saturday, 16 January 2010 01:40 (eleven years ago) link

Pizza Style Plain Flour

oh my god

sedentary lacrimation (Abbott), Saturday, 16 January 2010 03:03 (eleven years ago) link

Spicy Essence Of Vanilla Cakes
Serves 5
You will need:
150g ginger
3 sheets of ricepaper
3 cucumbers
90ml essence of vanilla
Instructions:
pre-heat the oven to 190 C
fry the ginger until browned
add one tablespoon of the ginger
stir-fry the essence of vanilla
mix the essence of vanilla in
toast the sheets of ricepaper
fry the sheets of ricepaper
sauté the cucumbers
bake for 70 minutes and serve hot

tehresa, Saturday, 16 January 2010 10:13 (eleven years ago) link

a little redundant imo

tehresa, Saturday, 16 January 2010 10:13 (eleven years ago) link

LJ to thread...

an executive by day and a wild man by night (snoball), Saturday, 16 January 2010 10:44 (eleven years ago) link

Plain Flour And Plain Flour Pudding
Serves 2
You will need:

* 30g lard
* 120ml exotic sauce
* 120ml white wine vinegar
* 110g plain flour

Instructions:

1. pre-heat the oven to 200 C
2. throw the lard away
3. toast the plain flour
4. saute the plain flour
5. blend with the plain flour
6. fold in the plain flour
7. discard the exotic sauce
8. whisk the plain flour
9. flip the plain flour
10. grill the white wine vinegar
11. bake for 80 minutes and serve hot

an executive by day and a wild man by night (snoball), Saturday, 16 January 2010 10:48 (eleven years ago) link

Anchovies With Ginger Dressing
Serves 5
You will need:

* 50ml mint sauce
* 20g anchovies
* 50g ginger
* 5 carrots

Instructions:

1. barbeque the ginger
2. grill the anchovies
3. toast the carrots
4. slice the mint sauce
5. throw it all away

an executive by day and a wild man by night (snoball), Saturday, 16 January 2010 11:01 (eleven years ago) link

Tomato Ketchup Pie
Serves 2
You will need:

* 150g port
* 150g lard
* 70ml tomato ketchup
* 80g chicken

Instructions:

1. put the chicken in the saucepan
2. discard the tomato ketchup
3. spoon the chicken onto a warmed plate
4. mix the chicken in
5. defrost the lard
6. heat the lard
7. fry the port until browned
8. put everything in the blender

Yum.

Body Butter (a hoy hoy), Saturday, 16 January 2010 20:23 (eleven years ago) link

This generator's logic isn't so different from my drunk brane's.

Fetchboy, Saturday, 16 January 2010 20:25 (eleven years ago) link

A recipe for "Strawberries Supreme" which includes the instruction "throw the strawberries away"

an executive by day and a wild man by night (snoball), Saturday, 16 January 2010 20:44 (eleven years ago) link

oh and the only other ingredient was four sheets of rice paper o_O

an executive by day and a wild man by night (snoball), Saturday, 16 January 2010 20:44 (eleven years ago) link

"Cheese Surprise", the surprise being there's no cheese in it because it's been thrown away...

an executive by day and a wild man by night (snoball), Saturday, 16 January 2010 20:48 (eleven years ago) link


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