rolling Jericho calls The New Day trap queens 2016

Ok post match Sasha looks a mess. Multiple refs have run straight in to check on her. I guess she could just be selling; I really hope she is ok.

Balor thinks about two sweeting the club.

How is Flo Rida such a thing for WWE?

David Otunga is still employed? Wth is this commentary team, poor Mauro.

Miz rocking a diamond phantom of the opera mask!

this will be an all-night spoiler to you ahh, but summerslam was literally 4 hours of everyone's finishers getting kicked out of 9 times each

i thought they were done with that

and yeah otunga is aaaaaaaaaaaaaaawful

that whole team has zero chemistry together

Otunga just said he calls crews jacked and an acrobat, a jackrobat. Ffs just fire him right here.

This has been alright, miz is perfect foil for crews to lay it in and look tough.

Re: That spoiler, I might just have to skip balor-Rollins, it looks so schimdie.

So far, other than the natural selection, no finisher kick outs and that is only a secondary finisher. Actually the first hour has been really fun. Wish they could fit a meaningless sami-cesaro match in too

For all the talk about cena's big match experience, I looked up cena at summerslam and you had to get to 2010, the 7 on 7 nexus match for a win.

Cena needs a new finisher, I think hornswaggle can counter or kick out of the aa at this point.

Match is good so far.

I'm always so shocked when cena actually hits the leg drop from the top.

This match needs some punches to the face, its all a bit too much 'i do a move, you do a move'

As a say that Cena hits a sweet clothesline. This is good.

Oh ok a super aa still gets a kick out. I think he needs to climb on the titantron with him.

Sweet match though

H8 the Hogan loss walkout for cena. Noone else loses and gets a whole send off saying omg look at this champion*

*hey jbl btw he isn't a champ atm.

So far, this has been way better than the last wm or ss. Wth jon Stewart turning up I'm sure it'll all change though

19 ppvs per year, not including nxt? I just don't have it in me.

Went back to bed and woke up to testicle jokes and kofis awesome pose while doing a top rope dive.

show went off a cliff after the Cena/Styles match

just don't give a fuck about Ambrose, Balor, Ziggler, Orton or even (sob) Lesnar

no cool angles or stories going into this show whatsoever, just four hours of guys having decent matches to very little end purpose.

unearned finisher kickouts most certainly do suck something rotten, especially when they're used as a smokescreen for guys not being able to tell stories. so many guys on the roster now seem to think that doing every move in the arsenal several times over and throwing in a shit ton of kickouts is what makes a great match. clueless.

i often love Rollins and i think he can be much better than that but man when he gives into those instincts he is basically the worst culprit

new title belt is a total disgrace

is Lesnar ever intending to work a proper match ever again? he is a problem rn

So I went to go make a sandwich during ambrose-ziggler and never went back. kinda cant be bothered. i guess rusev-reigns might be worth it.

The top of the card is so fucking disgraceful, like who tf cares about ambrose, ziggler, orton, even lesnar, reigns, rollins when cesaro, zayn, corbin, alpha and neville all didn't make the show (i.e. the rise of nxt) and the undercard was fun as hell with rejuvinated miz/cena/styles/jericho/kofi and new hungry talent like ko, the rest of new day, enzo and cass... Like oh, Randy Orton headlocks are the main event. Fucking great. Dunno if i'll ever watch it.

Title better or worse than Jeff Hardy design belt?

tbf there were not many headlocks in that main-event. plenty of suplexes though! also RKOs and F-5s. and kick-outs! gnarly elbows from Lesnar tbf which was briefly much more like it but still a nothing match.

idk if the problem is who they're choosing to position at the top of the cards so much as the house style being so out of control now. they need to get back to matches that build more slowly and tell organic stories. problem is they've trained the fans to only want one kind of big match now, and it's worn very thin

tbf

Balor out. yeesh. Bret Hart is obviously a grumpy old asshole (sorry Bret <3 u forever man) but Rollins is really making a bad habit of this

In lieu of a proper thing I'll write for my blog later in the week, this is my breakdown of the weekend:

- TakeOver was great as per usual. Yet it was another one where the main event wasn't the match of the night - the tag title and women's title matches were both superior. Great debut by Ember Moon, too - she's built just like Asuka. That's a future main event in the offing.

- SummerSlam was far too long. A six-hour show, counting the kick-off, with so little variety, fatigue set in hard before the Ziggler/Ambrose match. That was actually a really good match; in any other context it would have blown the roof off. But wrong place, wrong time.

- Title matches should never be used as cooldown spots. That tag title match was a mess. Jon Stewart died on his arse. It was cringe-worthy. Big E running out at the end was a relief pop, but only served to highlight how much The New Day needs all three together.

- Miz and Maryse are the cutest couple ever. But they're totally overshadowing the IC title. And WWE has dropped the ball so hard with Apollo Crews, it meant zero.

- The Women's Title match going on second felt weird, and it turned out to be an omen for how the rest of the night would be. I saw a few people chastise Charlotte and Sasha for attempting risky spots which is kinda bullshit seeing how AJ nearly drops Cena right on his head every time he does the Styles Clash. That being said, Sasha took more risks than she needed to in a match that didn't really warrant it. And now she's back on the bench.

- Cena/Styles was match of the night of course. And I've never liked Cena, but I can't deny his chemistry with Styles.

- I don't get how Roman being a complete tool makes him a face. But that's an old WWE problem.

- Balor and Rollins was good but underwhelming, probably due to fatigue from the long show, I'll watch it again to judge. The new belt is fine, it's literally identical to the World title except for the red strap and the black swoosh.

- That main event was really getting somewhere till they did that awful ending. TKOs in wrestling are bullshit. I don't care if they're trying to set precedent or whatever the hell. I didn't like it when Owens and Zayn did it, but I hated it here. It's completely jarring when you have a wrestling show for every match until the last one, which is suddenly a 'real fight', and what you're really saying with that is that this is cool and everything else on the night is just fake shit. But it wasn't cool to job out one of your top legacy stars to a part-timer, and with a clearly planned hardway cut spot that's another insult to the rest of the roster who can't get colour when it could really help. I can word this better but it just annoyed the shit out of me.

whats yr blog maccyd?

after what turned out to be a very stressful day (lol a day off wtf is that), i can finally chill and eat noodles and watch takeover

Link's on my Twitter @MacDara

Cheers.

Watching nxt. I'm so impressed they repeated the Tyler breeze trick of taking dodgy gimmick (this time the dancing minority) and make them a serious wrestler who could legit go to the top. Rip Tyler breeze, he had a selfie stick and some cracking super kicks.

Hideo Itami!!!!! I might start watching the weekly show again after this one match alone.

Ember Moon made the Kelly Kelly cartwheel ultimate chick move look vicious, so she's gotta be good. The eyes are arresting aaaand what a finisher. A+ debut, feel bad for her opponent, who I presume is the female jtts like tye Dillinger or cj parker.

Didn't they have the other beer money guy too? Beer guy #1 is playing a snob I guess? I feel I once saw an incredible match that was storm v. Roode nodq or something and other than that one match and the occasional fun beer money segment, he wasn't anything of note.

And I guess Queen did his theme? And people go mental for it? And he is ascending from the heavens, so he's more than a snob?

Does he still like beer? The theme is quite fun.

Wtf is almas? Wasn't he supposed to be the next 'the new reyrey'? Wtf are those suspenders and hat?

I'm gonna be quite annoyed if the announcer doesn't fully Bobby Rooooooooooooo

Or did I miss it? Maffew gotta be sad.

lol yeah in another life Almas was known as La Sombra and he was supposed to be really good (fuck if I know, never bothered with the Mexican promotions really) and I guess some of that translates well enough in the in-ring schtick, but my god the presentation of the guy. the music, the outfit, the hats... but i mean really, the fuckin NAME. Andrade "Cien" Almas", wtf is that?! it killed him dead before he'd even set foot beyond the curtain. what was wrong with Manny Andrade?

xxposts to Macdara - idk if i agree that WWE have shit the bed particularly egregiously with Apollo Crews, seeing as the guy is basically garbage rn anyway. i couldn't care less how athletic he is, it's 2016 and EVERYONE is crazy athletic and that is the fucking problem, if there were some other criteria on which we were encouraged to judge a new guy beyond "holy shit wasn't that a pretty standing shooting star press / exploder suplex / double foot-stomp / pele-kick / whatever the fuck else" then quite possibly things wouldn't be in this mess. Crews cannot work a mic, is wooden as fuck and has no character beyond "knows cool wrestling moves"

that's the problem I have with a lot of WWE atm in a nutshell. it's no problem at all when your character is "i'm extremely good at wrestling". it's a major a problem when the character is "i know lots of moves".

also the Universal belt is repellent, you can't just say "it's the same as the other one except it's red" because the red parts are what make it look so awful.

idk if i agree that WWE have shit the bed particularly egregiously with Apollo Crews, seeing as the guy is basically garbage rn anyway.

Yeah my view on him is that he never really benefitted from the 'developmental' part of the developmental system and they bumped him up to the main roster way too soon. A smile doesn't equal a personality.

also the Universal belt is repellent, you can't just say "it's the same as the other one except it's red" because the red parts are what make it look so awful.

I can say that, because it's true! But it's also totally fine to hate the red strap, just don't pretend it's completely horrid when it's pretty much the same thing in a different colour.

my god the presentation of the guy. the music, the outfit, the hats... but i mean really, the fuckin NAME. Andrade "Cien" Almas", wtf is that?! it killed him dead before he'd even set foot beyond the curtain. what was wrong with Manny Andrade?

My thoughts exactly. It's so strange. Manny Andrade is a fine name, and Cien Almas ("100 Souls") works too. They managed to turn two decent ideas into one bad one. And I've already expressed my confusion over his suspenders and feather-cap. I would really like to know whose idea that was, and how many people had to sign off on it, and why no one has put a stop to it yet.

Speaking of bad ideas: Roode's "Glorious Bomb" being a pump handle slam. I will never understand how any wrestler in WWE ends up with a lackluster finisher. Giving a guy a good finisher has got to be one of the most basic things you can do to help establish him, and there are always moves that will work. But they screw this up again and again. In fact, when you think of how identified WWE is with Hulk Hogan and John Cena, you realize that weak finishers are practically part of company's DNA.

i tbh think a lot about that one raw where crews was facing a social outcast with the stip that if he lost, he'd have to join, because of the adam rose vacancy. and he won. what was the point? he should've gotten a surprise roll-up and be forced to live with the consequences. that would've been great, it would've given him a story -- position him as a blue chip can't-miss prospect stuck with three legitimately horrible wrestlers and then play out literally the most cliche "ringer comes to love and support the losers he's surrounded with and they all start winning together" storyline over the next few months until apollo has an actual character and the outcasts get elevated to an actual thing.

and then have him turn on then as soon as tozawa comes up

that would require more than a single week of planning though

should've gotten surprise roll-up'd*

anyway i'm more and more angry about the orton/lesnar ending, what kind of bullshit was that. there was like 4 different spots he could've bladed. this is WWE being carny shit in a specific area where they shouldn't be carny shit, you can't force bryan to retire and try to position yourself as a good wellnessy company that's ahead of the CTE game and then literally have a massive MMA fighter intentionally elbow someone's head open the hard way (and you can't book fucking tommy dreamer to wrestle while we're at it)

just have orton blade, but honestly, if lesnar is really this much of a big spectacle-draw, why do his matches all require blood? it's not compelling, it doesn't make me more interested in watching WWE, all it does is open up this stupid meta-conversation about shoot fighting and MMA and ~realism~ and no one wants to give a shit about that right now

The Revival are greatest, smartest tag team. I love them so much. #diy were good but I was surprised the list of cena loss walk offs this weekend were cena, Bayley and fucking gargano and ciampa.

Asuka is one scary fucking lady and I don't buy anyone ever beating her for the title, to the point where I presume she'll have to lose it via being called up and it being made vacant.

Challops but I really dont like nakamuras 'blandly flail my arms around' entrance. He looks like making fun of disabled people. Its literally the only thing I don't love about his character. Also loved Joe whacking the Goldberg security guard out of his way.

Dean Ambrose spent the whole match mocking Ziggler for being a Shawn Michaels cosplay. I agree it deserves mocking but also lol that's who is supposedly supposed to be in the title main event in 2016 for the second biggest show of the year. The match was a slog, I wouldn't recommend it.

Also gotta love that with the brand split they immediately relegated the smackdown title to 4th on the card behind a non title and midcard raw title match. Priorities!

I picked summerslam back up and they showed a vignette where...

Someone waited since 3am... In 2016... To meet the dudley boyz.

This makes me so sad.

https://streamable.com/yvwz

wtf

i'm not ready to give in to the possibility of getting worked here, i'm just assuming WWE is now obsessed with blurring the line between kayfabe and reality and now that means the miz is going to fire off an incredible babyface promo on daniel bryan

it'd be better if miz actually had a reputation for keeping his opponents safe, not keeping himself safe at their expense

I don't see that as a babyface promo. Saying that Bryan is a coward for not quitting WWE to wrestle on the indies is insane.

i'm reading the wink wink wrestling subtext here as bryan criticizing miz for wrestling in the safe, cartoony WWE way and not the fall-on-your-head-to-test-how-soft-it-still-is-because-i'm-an-artist daniel bryan way, which is already a douchey way to go about things, and miz rightly pointed out that that's how bryan's career ended. and then he goes on to yell about how he's doing it for the fans, to elevate the title, etc

if this wasn't like entirely pre-planned then yeah, he was needling bryan but what else are you gonna say? in kayfabe bryan's career ended because he was reckless, now he's gonna criticize miz for not being reckless enough? when he won his match anyway, when he's carrying the last belt bryan cared about? you feel bad for bryan because literally everything he's been doing since his retirement has had this undertone of pure misery but miz was fiery and passionate and had every right to say what he said given what bryan seemed to be implying as a snobby meta-nerd

good stuff tbh

In or out of kayfabe, you can say that not going back to wrestling when doctors have told you you're at serious risk for severe brain damage is far from cowardly. But I agree that it was a great promo. It combined the totally justified and the totally out-of-line in a fully coherent way.

holy fuck

also lol at renee saying that wasnt the show to say it on. a show called 'talking smack'

Miz is one of the most underutilized guys in WWE. And I agree that Bryan's position is weird -- he's on record as saying that he hated the Orton-Lesnar finish, but accuses Miz for working too "soft"? This is the same guy who finished dozens of high profile matches in the indies by elbowing people repeatedly in the head until the ref called for the bell.

I'm slowly catching up on Takeover and Summerslam. Bayley vs Asuka told an amazing story and couldn't have been executed any better. Sometimes the inspirational babyface comeback story doesn't have a happy ending. It's a really difficult dynamic to pull off and they nailed it. The most similar feud in the WWE recently would be ... Bryan vs Reigns, I think? I can't think of any others quite like it off the top of my head.

Cena vs Styles was great but not as great as many people are making it out to be. I liked Nak vs Joe more on a second viewing, but it was still missing something. They weren't really on the same page throughout the match.

Cena vs Styles was great but not as great as many people are making it out to be.

Relativity, perhaps? When Cena works above his usual level, it's such a refreshing change it seems better than it is.

Nah, Cena is a great big match wrestler, I expected him to deliver. The match was v. good but for instance thought Styles' matches with Reigns were better.

*I* thought

yeah cena has absolutely mastered the finisher-heavy dramatic kickout-heavy wwe main event style match, and the match with aj was as good as that form gets, but i do understand people getting a little tired with the form itself

I would think it would be really worth Cena getting a new finisher for one of these event matches, like when Bryan won his first title at SummerSlam with a running knee he had never done before.

^^Totally agree, and it's an interesting thing to think about: what would be a suitable late-career new finisher for John Cena?

A new submission maybe, like when taker started using the triangle choke (I cant remember the name taker used). He isn't much of a striker or kicker and he already does a lot of power moves like the occasional powerbomb.

give him the Burning Hammer as a kind of modified AA. the transformation into spot-heavy mutant indy demi-god would be complete

just watched that Miz promo back again. really interesting time for someone to cut that promo and Miz was really the perfect guy to do it considering his history, his style and his talking ability.

the wider debate about concussions, the constant and massive injury list, not to mention the aesthetic merits of the current in-house go-go-go indy bombfest style - so many reasons why this is an important conversation to be having rn. surely they've got to start thinking about reining it back in pretty soon and teaching the fans to like slower, more methodical matches.

It would have to mutate into another thing altogether, you'd have to kill me before I watched another raw dominated by people only wrestling like sheamus.

well there is a middle ground between the two positions. if you think about the mid '80s thru mid '90s in the U.S. guys were mostly working a way safer style (with notable exceptions like Foley and Vader I guess). i don't look at the great stuff that Flair, Steamboat, Hart, Michaels, Austin, Sting etc. were doing in those years and feel that it was unsustainable in quite the same way as i do watching guys now.

i'm not advocating that people start wrestling like Dory Funk Jr. or anything, just that they stop bumping quite so hard all the fuckin time. it's no wonder their bodies are crumbling. especially the guys who've got 10-15 years on the clock already from the indys who are coming in and wrestling like 25 year olds.

Michaels being the misnomer there, as he bumped like a boss and had an injury a year since he was in the rockers.