Rolling 2014 Haunted Rocking Chair Thread

MITB was weird because instead of a big finish to multiple story lines it was the big start of several. That never is as satisfying because the endings were only to opening scene of a story. Raw benefitted from telling the first chapter of the stories set up at MITB.

Also the conclusion was rough- understandable but barely set up and really anticlimactic

a hoy hoy plz tell me when you're caught up

watched mitb, not raw but im most prob not gonna get around to it anyway and just read a recap, so go for it. cheers for waiting though

the pop for ambrose at mitb was the best

― a hoy hoy,

Yeah, Ambrose's return at the end of the match was the best part of the PPV, the heat was off the charts and way better than the pops any of the so-called main eventers got. The MITB briefcase is like what the IC title used to be, and Ambrose and Rollins are like Rock and HHH in '98, killing it in the upper midcard and arguably outshining the main event storylines. If the WWE doesn't mess this up then they'll have two huge stars on their hands.

also cena as new and 'the great champ ever' (as thought by michael cole) is lolz. way to pick up the ball w/ cesaro, wyatt or reigns

woulda been silly to hotshot it onto any of those guys now considering the champ is getting fed to brock at summerslam

a few questions:

1. what's the deal w/ kane? in kayfabe universe is he supposed to actually be a demon? or he is just, ya know, "demonic"?

2. are the two bella sisters really each dating bryan + cena? is that as bizarre as it sounds to me?

3. is it just me or can roman reigns only do two moves - a glorified [superman] punch, and a glorified clothesline (okay maybe spear isn't exactly a clothesline but pretty close right)? and if this is true, how can he possibly be champion?

1. Kane's wikipedia biography is probably like reading the wiki of a marvel character where you get three paragraphs in and start becoming embarrassed at all the stupid shit they've pulled; he basically alternates between self-aware comedy character and unconvincing I AM A DEMON AGAIN heel turns at this stage. There is probably a deliberate omission as to whether he was really ever meant to have been burned by a fire set by the Undertaker, when he was evil, or that he drunkenly killed a woman while driving back from a party in college

2. Yeah, Brie and Bryan are married though

3. Yeah basically; I think they see him being there but are smart enough to realise he's not ready so just try and build crowd interest and have him carry himself like a star until the time's right. Also, maybe when he shaves and cuts off his hair he'll look like the Rock?

reigns also does that awkwardly set up* dropkick to the head while the opponent hangs off the mat.

kane is a demon cos he does paperwork for the authority iirc? idk i find it laughable any time anyone is scared of kane, he's seemingly not won a match in like 15 years, wouldn't be surprised if hornswaggles ever beaten him.

*the fucking 619ing of professional wrestling. i fucking hate those sheamus fists to the chest, the orton hanging ddt etc. etc. etc. etc.

re the bellas - is it just that the wrestling world is so incestuous that it's not weird to have the 2 top guys be dating sisters?

The Bellas disappeared off tv and maybe were even released... at the same time Cena went through a divorce... and then came back to be GIVEN THEIR OWN TV SHOW after Cena's divorce was cleared up and he announced he was shagging one of them like the day after.

its pretty weird but only because they are twin sisters. the wrestling world has always had the ladies date their way to the top, debra&steve, liz&savage/lex, kelly kelly&everyone, sunny&everyone etc. etc.

i thought the recent rob van dam v. adrian neville match on NXT was pretty great

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghdb66JZDqM

http://network.yardbarker.com/all_sports/article_external/pennsylvania_prisoner_tries_to_sue_wwe_diva_natalya_for_250k_says_shes_an_evil_dominatrix/16810306?linksrc=story_article_yb_original_head_16810306

intercontinental battle royale conclusion :( i was so excited for a second

hot usos/wyatts match aside, this has been atrocious

i just saw lana's promo referencing the malaysia flight o_O but srsly her mocking america for their warmongering in iraq + afghanistan was fantastic

http://uproxx.files.wordpress.com/2014/07/brie-bella-bitch-guy.gif?w=650

that khali/rusev fight was great as two big guys just hitting each other

can't help but feel that appearing incapable of ever winning may be damaging the Wyatt Family's brand

Yeah but you can replace Wyatt Family with any number of names from the past couple years- Ryback and Ziggler being the biggest two fuck ups. Cesaro also struggling. The idea of trading wins and everyone but Brock losing is stupid. Get behind [x], he loses a lot! I think they think it makes everyone look competitive, while it actually just makes everyone look shit.

Wyatts v. Usos 2/3 falls was awesome from the other night. Rusev v. Swags was fun too. After finding out the Shield match wasn't on till SummerSlam I stopped watching. Can't be bothered with a main event with Kane on it, a battle royale and a Chris bleeding Jericho return. Raw has Lesnar so I might watch that 2 minutes.

https://twitter.com/HeymanHustle/status/492074145102848000

i love paul heyman

https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xpf1/t1.0-9/10570440_880868968609909_1071301118535599529_n.jpg

http://www.lux-limo.co.uk/limo-articles/black-funeral-car-limo-hire.jpg

rip big man

TNA has been cancelled because (they suck) they rehired Vince Russo. Its so beautiful.

Jim Cornette must have the biggest hard on right now.

thrilling opening to RAW tnite

http://www.wwe.com/videos/a-special-look-at-the-rivalry-between-john-cena-and-brock-lesnar-raw-aug-4-2014-26545252

https://www.jacobinmag.com/2014/08/money-in-the-bank/

long and unsurprising story short, wrestlers are treated like shit. this part was a bit of a surprise:

As attorney and academic Oliver Bateman writes, “most low-level performers and members of the female Diva division operate on short-term guaranteed contracts in the mid–five figures, out of which they must pay for their travel, food and lodging.”

must be tough to even get by day-to-day, never mind saving a bit of money for when your body inevitably gives up.

what's the scale for wrestlers? like i imagine john cena is doing okay for money. how about a guy like cesaro? or bray wyatt? do all members of the diva division operate on short-term contracts? (even paige and aj?)

i remember seeing a more detailed list at the time but this was a big leak earlier in the year http://www.tsmplug.com/richlist/wwe-wrestler-salaries/

internet got mad over steph and hunter paying themselves twice for office work & a performers salary

Its quite a bleak article but so mamy of its points are depressingly true. Shame he finds Vince so evil he gave Bobby Heenan throat cancer though, because shit like that devalues the legitimacy of the article.

I'm sure there are still many major issues outstanding wrt treatment of talent and so on but it does seem that some of this stuff is starting to change.

I can't recall precise details off the top of my head but as I understand it WWE has started putting into place various safeguards to ensure that their workers aren't totally broke / broken down husks once their careers are over - paying to put former employees through rehab, grants for released talent who want to pursue higher education in order to get themselves another job, taking an active hand in ensuring that new workers are sensible with their money, putting the Wellness Policy in place to prevent steroid abuse etc.

They've also actively banned a number of the dangerous spots that the article flags up (blading, piledrivers, unprotected chair shots) to the extent that it's now increasingly rare to see any of those things happen. Even when it does, it would seem to be the workers taking it upon themselves to do that shit - Jericho told a good anecdote recently on someone's podcast about a match he had with Batista when Big Dave cut himself open and apparently Vince went totally apeshit about it, tried to fine everyone involved a pretty hefty sum (six figures for both Batista and Jericho) and Batista took the hit for the team because it had been his call to do it.

Not saying that everything is rosy for WWE workers by any stretch of the imagination and I'm sure much more could be done to help them out and protect them, but the article's thrust seems to be that up until a decade or so ago things were real bad, and here's a list of all the people from the business a decade or more ago who suffered horrific shit as a result.

Of course there are still recent examples of people who are pretty much broken by the time they get out of the industry (is it Edge who can basically never take a bump again if he wants to keep all his motor functions intact?) but this again would seem to be on the wrestlers themselves to a certain extent. Randy Orton is a good example of a guy who's deliberately developed a style and moveset designed to be easy on his body with longevity in mind.

So yeah, there is no doubt that wrestling is still a dirty fucking business that chews people up and spits them right out again, but this article isn't especially evenhanded.

Cracking post. I mean a lot of stuff still needs to be worked out, Vince has too much past to be anything other than a con man etc. but they've made some incredible strides over the past ten years. Write a paragraph about how piledrivers end careers? Well there have only been three uses of them in the past 2 years, only been done by veterans (Kane, Punk & Undertaker) and been such a rarity that everyone has noticed and made a big deal out of them. Dynamite Kid got left without a doctor 25 years ago? Well matches now stop for the ring side doctor to check on someone on a nearly weekly basis. Chair-shots haven't existed in the past five years, bar Taker giving one to Hunter three years ago.

Sure they still need a union. All pro wrestlers do. What about the TNA guys on minimum wage still expected to pay travel & lodgings? God knows what some indie guys have to deal with then. There needs to be a wrestlers union. There always should have been. More strides have been made in that regard in the past 10 years (see examples in Windsor's post) and the way Jarrett's* promotion is looking, it wouldn't surprise me if a hook like that would be something he does to make them an attractive alternative. The promoters will have the cards at all levels until it can happen.

*Unfortunately its still Jarrett, who has been raised about as carny as wrestling promoters can be.

http://uproxx.com/prowrestling/2014/08/wwe-and-2k-confirmed-over-40-wrestlers-for-wwe-2k15/

are these wwe 2k games ever good?

i had the one with punk on the cover and it was supposed to be the best thing ever. i found it really dull & contrived. it had a storyline mode where you relived the attitude era, down to having to hit a guy w/ a chair in a match if it happened in 1997 etc.

my picks for tnite (based on what i want to happen, not on what i think is most likely to happen):

Lesnar + Heyman beat Cena
Wyatt beats Jericho
McMahon beats Brie
Rusev beats Swagger
Paige beats AJ
Orton beats Reigns
Dolph beats the Miz
Ambrose beats Rollins

probably won't watch tonight, gonna get my wrestling fill by watching this on repeat instead

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHAv0Dhka84

well i thought that was all totally great

great show.

Nothing was bad, but nothing was great either. How many more PPV matches can they get out of Rollins/Ambrose? Hopefully the heat for this feud doesn't die before WWE gets around to booking a proper blowoff. I'm getting tired of all these non-matches and screwy finishes.

does Lesnar have much of a record for injuring people? (I remember him powerbombing Bob Holly onto his head.) He has an aura of violence to him that not many in American wrestling have ever had (Vader is the only real comparison that comes to mind) but it kinda seems that a lot of that comes from him legit tossing people around with not much concern for how they land.

vince supposedly drove in the ambulance w/ undertaker?

WWE.com can confirm that, following last's night historic match with Brock Lesnar, The Undertaker was immediately taken to Ochsner Medical Center. After a CT scan and other medical testing, he was diagnosed with a severe concussion and was kept overnight for further evaluation. He was discharged early Monday afternoon.

Brock almost killed himself in doing a moonsault in a Wrestlemania match with Angle

Sorry, a shooting star press. I just watched it again for the cringing laughter it brings.

aw ziggler pointing at the WWE universe and cheering, "you did that," "you did that"

Between the Brock squash and the breezeblocks, that was a bloody fun two nights of wrestling.

Despite suffering what was deemed to be extensive head and spine trauma after being Curb Stomped through a pile of cinder blocks by Seth Rollins on Raw, Dean Ambrose has not only refused treatment but is reportedly missing after escaping WWE medical personnel altogether.

...

"At the time of bringing him backstage, he was responsive and was refusing transport to a local medical facility for further evaluation," said Amann. "He had removed the straps and surgical collar, said he refused to go and we haven't seen him since."

lol