Rolling 2014 Haunted Rocking Chair Thread

some stuff i liked from NXT this week:
1. Bo Dallas dressing up in a mask to sneak back into NXT. Half the crowd chanting "you can't fool us," the other half chanting, "yes he can," and then bo shouting from under his mask, "I'm not Bo Dallas! I'm not Bo Dallas!"
2. Adrian Neville, esp his red arrow finish - wow! It's at 1:40 in the video. esp the bounce and then the cover:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=31tBldYA-_g

3. the first appearance of Simon Gotch. i don't know a lot about him. just that he's an indie guy new to WWE and his shtick is an old-timey strongman. apparently him and aiden english are going to form a tag team called the Vaudevillains (!!!)

also rumor is that kevin steen is coming to WWE, so i went to watch one of his videos -

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6-m9UW4lTNk

the insane ladder package piledriver is at 7:40. crowd chanting, "please don't die, please don't die."

Steen is an old one. He's talented in ring, he can cut a nice promo but he's obviously not in great shape (rumour was his knees are p shot) and next to most of the wwe roster he looks like a schlub. Most I'd presume you can hope for, if he makes it past Chris Hero stage, is tag teaming with Generico again or tormenting midcarders and then easy fodder for a high card 'not cena or bryan' babyface? idk

otoh if he has a kevin steen zoo enthusiast midcard face gimmick he could be really fun to have on tv.

odd* one not old

Vaudevillains sounds awesome.

Anything happening with the SAWFT guys?

yeah i think one of them is injured and the other one by himself is so boring that i recognize the name but can't remember anything else about his act

i've heard ppl say about steen that a lot of what makes him wonderful is the extremely punishing ringwork he does - but that the WWE will probably not let him do most of it bc of risk of injury/death

http://i.imgur.com/lFrM0xE.jpg

i've only seen this one picture of them but i can already get on board with this gimmick, these guys look like they should be great fun

re: SAWFT: enzo amore is coming back within the next couple NXT episodes. about time, big cass doesn't really work solo

seth rollins looks like he just stepped out of a pool of garbage

lol bad news barrett just made a http://images.chron.com/blogs/askacat/hatcat.JPG joke

what does that fucking cat mean? ive needed to know for years.

not seen anything since before payback but the internet seems to think ambrose could legit be a face superstar? this makes me so happy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3n47fv1wAqw

He certainly picks up an interesting angle for this promo - "Scumbag Dean Ambrose being a bad figurehead for the company, potentially getting near the title scene" would be a decent progression for the HHH / Stephanie authority angle, given that there's no way they'll take a step back any time soon. Besides, they should strike while the iron is hot on Ambrose and Reigns - since Rollins turned they've been getting real good pops

i love scumbag dean ambrose

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=SVWTyA0lRt0

the pop for ambrose at mitb was the best

i heard raw last night was really good - i missed it though bc i'm working at a demo site all week away from home :(

also this is amazing <3 lana 4eva:
http://instagram.com/p/p4_d0fhK6l/

im only half way through mitb so maybe a polite ask for no spoilers for the last half of it/raw?

yeah, np. that's why i haven't really discussed anything from it yet.

Raw wuz good this week. MITB, I wasn't convinced.

MITB was weird because instead of a big finish to multiple story lines it was the big start of several. That never is as satisfying because the endings were only to opening scene of a story. Raw benefitted from telling the first chapter of the stories set up at MITB.

Also the conclusion was rough- understandable but barely set up and really anticlimactic

a hoy hoy plz tell me when you're caught up

watched mitb, not raw but im most prob not gonna get around to it anyway and just read a recap, so go for it. cheers for waiting though

the pop for ambrose at mitb was the best

― a hoy hoy,

Yeah, Ambrose's return at the end of the match was the best part of the PPV, the heat was off the charts and way better than the pops any of the so-called main eventers got. The MITB briefcase is like what the IC title used to be, and Ambrose and Rollins are like Rock and HHH in '98, killing it in the upper midcard and arguably outshining the main event storylines. If the WWE doesn't mess this up then they'll have two huge stars on their hands.

also cena as new and 'the great champ ever' (as thought by michael cole) is lolz. way to pick up the ball w/ cesaro, wyatt or reigns

woulda been silly to hotshot it onto any of those guys now considering the champ is getting fed to brock at summerslam

a few questions:

1. what's the deal w/ kane? in kayfabe universe is he supposed to actually be a demon? or he is just, ya know, "demonic"?

2. are the two bella sisters really each dating bryan + cena? is that as bizarre as it sounds to me?

3. is it just me or can roman reigns only do two moves - a glorified [superman] punch, and a glorified clothesline (okay maybe spear isn't exactly a clothesline but pretty close right)? and if this is true, how can he possibly be champion?

1. Kane's wikipedia biography is probably like reading the wiki of a marvel character where you get three paragraphs in and start becoming embarrassed at all the stupid shit they've pulled; he basically alternates between self-aware comedy character and unconvincing I AM A DEMON AGAIN heel turns at this stage. There is probably a deliberate omission as to whether he was really ever meant to have been burned by a fire set by the Undertaker, when he was evil, or that he drunkenly killed a woman while driving back from a party in college

2. Yeah, Brie and Bryan are married though

3. Yeah basically; I think they see him being there but are smart enough to realise he's not ready so just try and build crowd interest and have him carry himself like a star until the time's right. Also, maybe when he shaves and cuts off his hair he'll look like the Rock?

reigns also does that awkwardly set up* dropkick to the head while the opponent hangs off the mat.

kane is a demon cos he does paperwork for the authority iirc? idk i find it laughable any time anyone is scared of kane, he's seemingly not won a match in like 15 years, wouldn't be surprised if hornswaggles ever beaten him.

*the fucking 619ing of professional wrestling. i fucking hate those sheamus fists to the chest, the orton hanging ddt etc. etc. etc. etc.

re the bellas - is it just that the wrestling world is so incestuous that it's not weird to have the 2 top guys be dating sisters?

The Bellas disappeared off tv and maybe were even released... at the same time Cena went through a divorce... and then came back to be GIVEN THEIR OWN TV SHOW after Cena's divorce was cleared up and he announced he was shagging one of them like the day after.

its pretty weird but only because they are twin sisters. the wrestling world has always had the ladies date their way to the top, debra&steve, liz&savage/lex, kelly kelly&everyone, sunny&everyone etc. etc.

i thought the recent rob van dam v. adrian neville match on NXT was pretty great

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghdb66JZDqM

http://network.yardbarker.com/all_sports/article_external/pennsylvania_prisoner_tries_to_sue_wwe_diva_natalya_for_250k_says_shes_an_evil_dominatrix/16810306?linksrc=story_article_yb_original_head_16810306

intercontinental battle royale conclusion :( i was so excited for a second

hot usos/wyatts match aside, this has been atrocious

i just saw lana's promo referencing the malaysia flight o_O but srsly her mocking america for their warmongering in iraq + afghanistan was fantastic

http://uproxx.files.wordpress.com/2014/07/brie-bella-bitch-guy.gif?w=650

that khali/rusev fight was great as two big guys just hitting each other

can't help but feel that appearing incapable of ever winning may be damaging the Wyatt Family's brand

Yeah but you can replace Wyatt Family with any number of names from the past couple years- Ryback and Ziggler being the biggest two fuck ups. Cesaro also struggling. The idea of trading wins and everyone but Brock losing is stupid. Get behind [x], he loses a lot! I think they think it makes everyone look competitive, while it actually just makes everyone look shit.

Wyatts v. Usos 2/3 falls was awesome from the other night. Rusev v. Swags was fun too. After finding out the Shield match wasn't on till SummerSlam I stopped watching. Can't be bothered with a main event with Kane on it, a battle royale and a Chris bleeding Jericho return. Raw has Lesnar so I might watch that 2 minutes.

https://twitter.com/HeymanHustle/status/492074145102848000

i love paul heyman

https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xpf1/t1.0-9/10570440_880868968609909_1071301118535599529_n.jpg

http://www.lux-limo.co.uk/limo-articles/black-funeral-car-limo-hire.jpg

rip big man

TNA has been cancelled because (they suck) they rehired Vince Russo. Its so beautiful.

Jim Cornette must have the biggest hard on right now.

thrilling opening to RAW tnite

http://www.wwe.com/videos/a-special-look-at-the-rivalry-between-john-cena-and-brock-lesnar-raw-aug-4-2014-26545252

https://www.jacobinmag.com/2014/08/money-in-the-bank/

long and unsurprising story short, wrestlers are treated like shit. this part was a bit of a surprise:

As attorney and academic Oliver Bateman writes, “most low-level performers and members of the female Diva division operate on short-term guaranteed contracts in the mid–five figures, out of which they must pay for their travel, food and lodging.”

must be tough to even get by day-to-day, never mind saving a bit of money for when your body inevitably gives up.

what's the scale for wrestlers? like i imagine john cena is doing okay for money. how about a guy like cesaro? or bray wyatt? do all members of the diva division operate on short-term contracts? (even paige and aj?)

i remember seeing a more detailed list at the time but this was a big leak earlier in the year http://www.tsmplug.com/richlist/wwe-wrestler-salaries/

internet got mad over steph and hunter paying themselves twice for office work & a performers salary