WE'RE EXPECTING !!!!!!

And here's what happens after you appear in the WE'RE GETTING MARRIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thread.

http://www.kristieliasblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/pregnancy-portrait-photographer(pp_w900_h1125).jpg

Could you two have waited, like, another month before doing this?
http://www.mayadphotography.com/wp-content/themes/RAWfolio/php/tt.php?src=http://www.mayadphotography.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/20120204_145516.jpg&w=900&h=600&zc=3&q=100&a=c

Better count the fingers on this baby one more time after it's born.
http://photographyjulia.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/boulder_maternity_photos6.jpg
(And, why - the - hat?)

They sure have improved sonograms since the old days, haven't they?
http://www.a-fotografy.co.uk/blog/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/East-lothian-maternity-portrait-photographer1.jpg

http://www.jodieotte.com/blog/1111/outdoor_maternity.jpg

Look out for Vic Morrow!
http://www.ellegphotography.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/ellerman-215.jpg

http://xaxor.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/WTF-pregnancy-portraits5.jpg

And finally,
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m7fy2lxPnu1qiewrho1_500.jpg

And these aren't official portraits, but posting these to get them out of the way.

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-MnxTSlefj3Y/TlcM1Sehy2I/AAAAAAAAAEY/2cCjFdAIsmo/s1600/pregnant+with+gun.jpg

http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20080210191235/aliens/images/9/94/Alien_facehugger.jpg

Stockholm syndrome in those last pics from pp

https://dl.dropbox.com/u/1484956/alien%20expecting.png

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-MnxTSlefj3Y/TlcM1Sehy2I/AAAAAAAAAEY/2cCjFdAIsmo/s1600/pregnant+with+gun.jpg

http://www.engr.uark.edu/directory/594.php

"The YOU of A" is the University of Arkansas' catchphrase? That is a shame.

What strikes me about the gun pictures is how murderously aggressive the men look, while the women just look pregnant and content and not like an angry, gun-wielding, Dockers-wearing wingnut has them in a headlock.

And I mean, what's the point of that picture? "Don't fuck with my pregnant wife, pictured here in a headlock, or I'll fucking shoot you!" Do they hang these up on their doors under the "This property protected by Smith & Wesson" sign? Do the wives have shirts printed with these pictures to wear when their husbands aren't in headlocking distance? Is this their Christmas card and do people subsequently decline to pay holiday visits for fear of being shot? I just have so many questions.

"I have captured and drugged your pregnant wife and if you attempt to retrieve her, I will shoot you in the face!"

http://farm6.staticflickr.com/5019/5478317699_db0a585c8d_z.jpg

http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2291/2253247437_bd20575fc4.jpg

You should try having an angry, gun-wielding, Dockers-wearing wingnut get you in a nice, tight, inescapable headlock sometime. Before you know it, the sense of security will overwhelm your synapses with the loveliest chemicals and you will not be able to remember how you lived before.

A paternity test might be your best shot for an answer.

http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8449/8017001277_c01cdaf73b_c.jpg

Wasn't crazy about this one at first, until I imagined how nice a velour cushion would feel on one's own bare ass.

http://farm7.staticflickr.com/6225/6852366366_1622497941_c.jpg

^^ 70s roman polanski film vibe w/ that one

Do you think that photographer did some Photoshopping in the crotch area there? Something looks weird.

she actually has no vagina.

I don't understand the need to take off your shirt and SHOW me you are pregnant. If you tell me that you're pregnant, I'll believe you. It's been done before. Just write it on your standard stationary. Give me visual evidence when you get the highest score in Donkey Kong.

What strikes me about the gun pictures is how murderously aggressive the men look, while the women just look pregnant and content and not like an angry, gun-wielding, Dockers-wearing wingnut has them in a headlock.

― carl agatha, Saturday, December 29, 2012 12:57 PM (3 hours ago)

What (also) strikes me about them is the astonishment that there is more than one couple that wanted to be photographed in that pose

Is the left not a parody of the right?

Apparently, since the pic on the right is on about 30 blogs but I can't find the other one elsewhere (tineye.com is so useful). But the woman in the parody doesn't look as happy/oblivious as the original

http://i.imgur.com/crvqoWl.jpg

!

aaaaahahahahaha

lollll

OMG lololol

http://i.imgur.com/EPLkvQH.jpg

oh my

Found a smaller size, did an image search for something bigger, ended up posing something with a watermark. So off my game.

http://youarenotaphotographer.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/baby-punch.jpg

http://youarenotaphotographer.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/baby-arch.jpg

haha wat

I'm sitting here with my jaw dropped, unable to look away.

O_o

I know this isn't the right thread, but neither was the WE'RE EXPECTING thread either.

http://i.imgur.com/yp7IkCr.jpg

it kinda belongs on the irrational anger thread cuz it's driving me nuts that the dates go 2010-2005-2012 instead of chronologically left-to-right

i also want to graffiti 'klaatu barada nikto' underneath it

x-post - I can tell you right now that I hate that couple. A lot. Also the chronology thing is annoying at first but it's sorta like a monogram with the wedding in the middle and each kid on a side. Better not have any oopsie third babies. Decorating nightmare.

It's a shame they all died though.

irl lol

at pp's post, not the horrible horrible wall of awful

how can they have gone to the trouble of building a monument to the time of their children's births without specifying AM or PM?

ok i guess the wedding was presumably 2:30 pm but this doesn't excuse the left and right

plus now i'm gonna have to celebrate the strangers' births four times each year: 8:23 am + 8:23 pm on Dec 11th, 7:30 am + 7:30 pm on Feb 13th
fuck!

How could they have gone to the trouble without pausing to think about how awful and dated that's going to look in like two years? Maybe one at this point.

A+ thread

That St. Louis one makes me think the Arch is the father every time.

who the fuck would put a clock that low down on the wall?

not the same thing exactly but a family i knew in high school had a stillborn about 10yrs prior; they had photo of the stillborn on a mantelpiece with a permanent light over it

the mom signed christmas birthday cards etc from the family + baby's name "in heaven"

they were the nicest ppl but it weirded me out sooooo much

There's only one way that could've been any worse.

clock?

"inadvertently creating a pipe bomb" jesus

chef's kiss to that gender reveal

Well then.

I guess...

https://i.imgur.com/TCIgxtK.gif

... she wasn't expecting that!

something something nuclear family

- "Psst. By the way, the baby's going to be a girl!"

- "Ok, that's great. Listen, I think he's about to do the eulogy..."

This may be the worst + funniest gender reveal I have seen

https://www.instagram.com/p/B4IzA14gTje

whatever happened to just posting an ultrasound on Facebook and having half the people guess incorrectly?

young people today do everything wrong

I mean, if you're looking for a silver lining, this happened during the gender bomb prep, not during the full-on reveal with 36 close relatives standing around it.

after human cloning is perfected, people will reveal the gender of their baby at a party by murdering their favorite aunt/uncle. then they will feast on smoked michael bay.

https://i.imgur.com/newdIWa.jpg

ahahaha

You're right, this is the wrong thread. Let's pray that there's never a right thread for these, ok?

https://i.imgur.com/GykEMsH.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/LoWNXiC.jpg

The dang hets don’t know when to take a break

diabetesdiapersanddeadlifts

https://66.media.tumblr.com/cd024949509273abef7bea75f2b6b41c/tumblr_p11ntiU3is1ud05ppo1_1280.jpg

this would make all three series so much better

i socialized my ilx thought on twitter, i'm sorry

This is why copyright sucks. Baby Jesus Sonic with Batman and Shrek as Joseph and Mary, guest starring Wayne Gretzky as the wise man, would be incomparably greater, even if it were poorly executed. SEGA, Disney, and WB wouldn't let it happen because they know they can't compete. https://t.co/mQKK5l4h0H

— a load of baloney (@weinventyou) April 1, 2020

what's weird is i don't think most people are recognizing all the Nativity scene references. i guess they're obvious enough that they don't bear mentioning, but i love the subtle inclusion of jesus/sonic, shrek as the virgin mary, batman as best supporting actor in a miniseries.

https://www.reddit.com/r/classic4chan/comments/51aza7/request_batman_embracing_shrek_whos_pregnant_with/

The queen is tethered to my belly inside of a cage. Poetry. pic.twitter.com/KyAJQLEza5

— Emily Murnane (@emily_murnane) July 3, 2020

amazing! unbeelievable!

I'm not sure what disturbs me more: the bees, or "Poetry."

the baby's name will be poetree

Poignant explanation from the Bee Lady (who, btw, is still carazy as hell.)

I.. couldn't see an explanation about why she has bees on her, which to me was the notable thing about the photos
Many sympathies and best of luck to her family though

Combo of difficult experiences + love of bees?

I mean, no, it doesn't add up on my calculator, per se...

some kids don't know their parents are crazy until high school. Kids itt have a leg up there.

I mean, is this lady a beekeeper? Or did she just hire bees specifically for this purpose????? Is this even a thing?

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EhFT9lnXcAMu6lR?format=jpg&name=large

love this.

is the truck the dad?

sure is, proud papa!

truckbaby x1000

You talk a small game for someone with such a big truck.

hate when i'm driving my 18 wheeler and this happens

Like you all have never heard of a baby carrier.

m'lady

strong Transformers 9 energy

#ElDoradoFire | SAN BERNARDINO/ INYO/ MONO UNIT |
El Dorado Fire Cause pic.twitter.com/PNBQWMXMwK

— CAL FIRE (@CAL_FIRE) September 7, 2020

assholes

sanpaku posted about that this morning, along with ANOTHER gender reveal fire (that one was only 10 acres, though)

fucking crazy man

surely a cake would suffice

throw some candles on there, you can still burn shit down while revealing

https://i.imgur.com/m94366y.jpg

I hate these can u imagine if gay people invited their family over for a party so they could wear shirts that said “the cum came from HERE and went THERE!” my family would never speak to me again pic.twitter.com/PRvKQc5AQr

— dylan (@dylaneatswings) November 23, 2020

How it started. How it’s going. pic.twitter.com/KZaFkFgGrU

— YS (@NYinLA2121) December 1, 2020

https://www.cnn.com/2021/02/08/us/man-killed-cannon-baby-shower-trnd/index.html

the fact that it was an irl ~cannon~ filled with ~too mich gunpowder~

like

folks

what were they even trying to do here bc surely their intent was not to kill a friend jfc

The homeowner had purchased the cannon at an auction and had fired it several times before

imagine having this dolt for a neighbour.

Would it be untoward to say... that someone wasn't expecting?

not untoward at all.. very toward actually

CNN supposedly such a trusted news source, and yet, not one word about the baby's gender.