Sarahel's Semiotics 4U

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i think i came across the relevant thread during an insomniac random thread click.

my other display name is a controversial mod edit (sarahel), Friday, 25 September 2009 09:51 (fourteen years ago) link

i know those well.

how many post have you made now? this is 5192 for me.

estela, Friday, 25 September 2009 09:56 (fourteen years ago) link

s

estela, Friday, 25 September 2009 09:57 (fourteen years ago) link

uh oh 5202 for me

my other display name is a controversial mod edit (sarahel), Friday, 25 September 2009 09:57 (fourteen years ago) link

<3

estela, Friday, 25 September 2009 09:59 (fourteen years ago) link

thank you for indulging my vacuum cleaners

my other display name is a controversial mod edit (sarahel), Friday, 25 September 2009 09:59 (fourteen years ago) link

thank you for indulging my interest in your posting total.

estela, Friday, 25 September 2009 10:21 (fourteen years ago) link

Straight one is like a straight, "You suck."

Flying one is like someone in a sing-song voice, "You suuUUUuuuUuuck!"

bamcquern, Friday, 25 September 2009 12:36 (fourteen years ago) link

well, it has multiple connotations. It could be interpreted as "you suck," but as the vacuum cleaner is the thing doing the sucking, it could just as easily connote "i suck," or "this sucks"

my other display name is a controversial mod edit (sarahel), Friday, 25 September 2009 17:34 (fourteen years ago) link

pol·y·se·mous (pl-sms)
adj.
Having or characterized by many meanings:

I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Friday, 25 September 2009 19:27 (fourteen years ago) link

haha i love what bamcquern said

i saw that yellow dyson at the store this morning

heave haw (roxymuzak), Friday, 25 September 2009 22:23 (fourteen years ago) link

i love it too.

estela, Friday, 25 September 2009 22:48 (fourteen years ago) link

three weeks pass...

meanwhile - over a million facebook users have become fans of vitaminwater

sarahel, Monday, 19 October 2009 20:38 (fourteen years ago) link

damn them

鬼の手 (Edward III), Monday, 19 October 2009 20:41 (fourteen years ago) link

apparently vitamin water is successful enough that some other company has come out with vitamintea

sarahel, Monday, 19 October 2009 20:43 (fourteen years ago) link

sue them

鬼の手 (Edward III), Monday, 19 October 2009 20:44 (fourteen years ago) link

both products have the same sans-serif font product label thing going on. The vitamintea (one word) company is "Pureamerican" - which makes me wonder whether sans-serif fonts in food packaging and in supermarkets are supposed to connote organic-ness and purity or something.

sarahel, Monday, 19 October 2009 20:46 (fourteen years ago) link

sure!

e\m/ily (roxymuzak), Thursday, 22 October 2009 21:04 (fourteen years ago) link

two weeks pass...

did innocent smoothies invent that thing where every product label acts like ur pal. kept expecting the directions on the frozen pizza box 2 call me "bro," prolly serves me right for reading them tho

plaques (I know, right?), Saturday, 7 November 2009 21:29 (fourteen years ago) link

i dunno - Odwalla juice did this quite a while ago. That was the first time I noticed it. I read these things as well.

sarahel, Saturday, 7 November 2009 21:35 (fourteen years ago) link

btw happy birthday u r awesome!

plaques (I know, right?), Saturday, 7 November 2009 21:37 (fourteen years ago) link

thanks!

This is from a bottle of "Honest Ade Superfruit Punch"

Not all superheroes are real (we're pretty sure Green Lantern doesn't exist), but our Superfruit Punch is nothing but real. The dynamic duo in this drink is blah blah blah ingredients blah blah nutritional benefits blah blah description of product made to sound enticing.

sarahel, Saturday, 7 November 2009 21:39 (fourteen years ago) link

whoever invented this shit should be killed immediately

plaques (I know, right?), Saturday, 7 November 2009 21:40 (fourteen years ago) link

tell me about innocent smoothies.

sarahel, Saturday, 7 November 2009 21:45 (fourteen years ago) link

they are cunty and expensive but irresistibly delicious

plaques (I know, right?), Saturday, 7 November 2009 21:48 (fourteen years ago) link

what does the packaging say though?

sarahel, Saturday, 7 November 2009 21:49 (fourteen years ago) link

happy birthday
i also totally hate when ad copy pretends it cares about you

harbl, Saturday, 7 November 2009 21:50 (fourteen years ago) link

oh they have this thing where they go 28 grapes! 5 apples! 6 strawberries! and no bungalows! and ur meant to be like "oh shiz i didn't see that coming!"

plaques (I know, right?), Saturday, 7 November 2009 21:51 (fourteen years ago) link

i hate products with annoying stupid names that it almost triggers a fit of self-loathing to even say to yourself, let alone out loud.

sarahel, Saturday, 7 November 2009 21:53 (fourteen years ago) link

current ad copy placed on each label of Arrowhead:

THE ULTIMATE HYDRATOR
Arrowhead brand mountain spring water has no calories, and we do not add anything: no sweeteners, no caffeine, no sodium - it's pure refreshment that quenches your thirst and replenishes your body.
Be Healthy.

Milton Parker, Sunday, 8 November 2009 03:20 (fourteen years ago) link

This bag of Doritos has this inspirational story about a kid on the back, but I can't get past the bold type on bright yellow that says:

Buddy Booby's
Birthmark Read Along

sarahel, Sunday, 8 November 2009 18:59 (fourteen years ago) link

In the Mouth of Madness.

pringles and loving it (latebloomer), Sunday, 8 November 2009 20:48 (fourteen years ago) link

When it comes to juice we understand your need to get Naked.

sarahel, Sunday, 8 November 2009 20:50 (fourteen years ago) link

one month passes...

50cent owns vitamin water?

plaxico (I know, right?), Saturday, 12 December 2009 23:53 (fourteen years ago) link

do you not listen to rap music?

I took quarter water, sold it in bottles for two bucks/Coca-Cola came and bought it for billions, what the fuck?

can you eat baconator? (Whiney G. Weingarten), Saturday, 12 December 2009 23:55 (fourteen years ago) link

yeah, when u said that line i realised i knew it but i didn't like that song and it never i dunno sunk in which is weird cos its pretty wtf

plaxico (I know, right?), Saturday, 12 December 2009 23:59 (fourteen years ago) link

http://pbfcomics.com/archive_b/PBF020-Skub.gif

=皿= (dyao), Sunday, 20 December 2009 07:46 (fourteen years ago) link

http://i45.tinypic.com/2v12reh.jpg

why are there dog sweaters all of a sudden? People have had dogs for centuries. People have knitted sweaters for centuries. Why dog sweaters now?

sarahel, Monday, 28 December 2009 08:19 (fourteen years ago) link

The only thing I can think of to explain this, is the increased anthropomorphization of pets, especially dogs, which includes talking about them as if they were one's children, social networking sites for pets, bringing dogs to work, restaurants, etc.

sarahel, Monday, 28 December 2009 08:25 (fourteen years ago) link

The As Seen On TV store I work at has dog Snuggies. I got one for my sister's dog this Christmas as a gag gift.

hear shart attack (latebloomer), Monday, 28 December 2009 09:04 (fourteen years ago) link

this?

http://brandonreed.files.wordpress.com/2009/08/dog-snuggie.jpg

sarahel, Monday, 28 December 2009 09:04 (fourteen years ago) link

yep!

hear shart attack (latebloomer), Monday, 28 December 2009 09:07 (fourteen years ago) link

Yeah - it's gotta be some anthropomorphizing desire. Someone suggested that it had to do with people having breeds of dogs as pets that aren't "native" to the particular climate, but I've seen long-haired dogs in dog sweaters, and I live in the Bay Area which has a pretty mild climate as it is.

sarahel, Monday, 28 December 2009 09:11 (fourteen years ago) link

http://i48.tinypic.com/15zfryq.jpg
http://i50.tinypic.com/28r1mk2.jpg
http://i48.tinypic.com/mj154.jpg

almost all these vacuums have clear parts, which often seem to connote a need for the user of the product to see it working.

sarahel, Tuesday, 5 January 2010 00:52 (fourteen years ago) link

gross

=皿= (dyao), Tuesday, 5 January 2010 03:31 (fourteen years ago) link

will probably inculcate the buyer with insecurities about the cleanliness of their vacuum cleaner, necessitating the need to buy a smaller, opaque vacuum cleaner to keep their big vacuum cleaner clean

=皿= (dyao), Tuesday, 5 January 2010 03:32 (fourteen years ago) link

sadly i recognize that price tag+ store fixtures as being from Bed Bath and Beyond.

Philip Nunez, Tuesday, 5 January 2010 03:44 (fourteen years ago) link

it's meant to scare the buyer straight. at a glance, s/he can witness the buildup of dust, pubes, dead bugs, foot particles, etc. all over the floor. overcome by horror and nausea, the buyer vows to pull out the vacuum at the merest hint of uncleanliness, lest the floor grime should turn sentient and devour all the neighborhood children. the overused vacuum will wear out and need to be replaced sooner than usual, putting more money in Mr. Bissel's wallet.

un(!)registered (unregistered), Tuesday, 5 January 2010 03:55 (fourteen years ago) link

five months pass...

also - corndogs - is there a relation between the popularity of corndogs with hipsters and the way they "perform" masculinity?

― i don't know whether it's really popular in Canada as well (sarahel), Monday, June 21, 2010 1:57 PM (4 minutes

i think this post fits better in this thread

i don't know whether it's really popular in Canada as well (sarahel), Monday, 21 June 2010 21:03 (thirteen years ago) link


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