1. An adaptation of Blood Meridian scored by Def Leppard
― real men love cheeses (latebloomer), Saturday, 4 July 2009 06:07 (ten years ago) link
2. I'll move to San Francisco3. Make a monster costume out of a dirty shag rug4. Mobile DJ at English pub in a town an hour away using a PA I've never used
― bamcquern, Saturday, 4 July 2009 06:25 (ten years ago) link
5. date down
― carpathian florist (roxymuzak), Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:08 (ten years ago) link
6. date
― what a delightfully quirky new voice! (bug), Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:10 (ten years ago) link
7. An adaption of The Mikado done entirely using mobile ringtones.
― snoball, Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:30 (ten years ago) link
8. a book about combat rock compared/contrasted with the 1982 worlds fair
― carpathian florist (roxymuzak), Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:38 (ten years ago) link
9. (another music one, but that's what I save most of my truly bad ideas for) An album made entirely using samples from Lou Reed's "Metal Machine Music" and Presley's "Having Fun With Elvis On Stage" (because they are supposedly the worst two albums ever made - my theory being that I could make an even worse-er album by combining them).
― snoball, Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:44 (ten years ago) link
10. putting chilli sauce on vanilla ice cream - one mouthful was enough to cause projectile vomiting.
― snoball, Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:46 (ten years ago) link
11. marinara sauce and peanut butter
― what a delightfully quirky new voice! (bug), Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:56 (ten years ago) link
12. Going back to school.
― Turkoglu & Love Affair (Clay), Saturday, 4 July 2009 09:03 (ten years ago) link
nah, that's a great idea.
― what a delightfully quirky new voice! (bug), Saturday, 4 July 2009 09:55 (ten years ago) link
13. Starting the thread "What does 'rockist' mean?"
― bamcquern, Saturday, 4 July 2009 16:05 (ten years ago) link
14. A pop group exclusively made up of 2 year olds called Diaper Rash.
― real men love cheeses (latebloomer), Saturday, 4 July 2009 16:09 (ten years ago) link
― bamcquern, Saturday, July 4, 2009 11:05 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark
if your original post was a gigantic picture of goatse with an embedded sound clip of, i dunno, somebody having explosive diarrhea or something, then it'd be a pretty great idea
― what a delightfully quirky new voice! (bug), Saturday, 4 July 2009 17:28 (ten years ago) link
15. deciding you wanna ride a goddamn ferris wheel
― i yelled "BIG HOOS" but i was yelling at my steen (BIG HOOS aka the steendriver), Saturday, 4 July 2009 17:40 (ten years ago) link
16. 1p3
― a poppy seed NAGL (J0rdan S.), Saturday, 4 July 2009 17:46 (ten years ago) link
rong
― i yelled "BIG HOOS" but i was yelling at my steen (BIG HOOS aka the steendriver), Saturday, 4 July 2009 18:17 (ten years ago) link
17. Sell white rice dyed brown to exploit gullible newcomers to the health food world (long time health food consumers would probably see right through the scam.) The brand would be called "Rice that is Brown" rather than "So-and-So brown rice" and list the ingredients in super timy print.
― latebloomer, Friday, 11 September 2009 02:29 (ten years ago) link
eh..tiny print
― latebloomer, Friday, 11 September 2009 02:30 (ten years ago) link
haha the next step would be "Rice that is Multiethnic" and it would just be bag of Fruity Pebbles.
― we like cars, we like cartoons (dyao), Friday, 11 September 2009 02:37 (ten years ago) link
would that actually like... save you any money?
― mountain G.O.A.T. (s1ocki), Friday, 11 September 2009 03:32 (ten years ago) link
slocki you don't get it--IT'S A TERRIBLE IDEA!
― ian, Friday, 11 September 2009 06:36 (ten years ago) link
1. An adaptation of Blood Meridian scored by Def Leppard7. An adaption of The Mikado done entirely using mobile ringtones.
18. an adaptation of Do You Remember Love?/Macross for the musical theater/broadway stage.
― tehresa, Friday, 11 September 2009 07:08 (ten years ago) link
maybe less terrible and more so not gonna happen why bc i am lazy
im dying over rice that is brown
― Angus Young (roxymuzak), Monday, 14 September 2009 12:04 (ten years ago) link
19. Putting a book of my poetry out20. Taking up a drug habit on the back of the highly unlikely profits from this anthology of work (any suggestions for the drugs?)
― Don't Be A Ned Raggett (King Boy Pato), Monday, 14 September 2009 12:09 (ten years ago) link
idk I've actually been pretty impressed with yr writing. Honestly.
― \(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Monday, 14 September 2009 16:59 (ten years ago) link
21. Combination mezzuzah and bottle opener, so you're never at a loss with a cold beer in your hand.
― that stupid-ass cannibal pen-pal of yours (Laurel), Monday, 14 September 2009 17:03 (ten years ago) link
(xxpost) not my terrible idea, but someone once suggested to me, in all seriousness, that I become a smack head in order to guarantee that I could continue to claim benefits.
― a gift from your mind in the form of the perfect beat (snoball), Monday, 14 September 2009 17:04 (ten years ago) link
patoetry plzzz
― jergins, Monday, 14 September 2009 17:06 (ten years ago) link
art project involving tramp stamps, semen and polaroid camera.
― ian, Monday, 14 September 2009 17:31 (ten years ago) link
A Terrible Plan!
― velko, Monday, 14 September 2009 17:35 (ten years ago) link
tramp stamps on actual tramps
― fountain bleaut (s1ocki), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:15 (ten years ago) link
like, hoboes
i thought it would be great an edgy brooklyn gallery! you know, like, transgressive sexuality & the mainstream appeal of defacing the body. or something.
― ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:19 (ten years ago) link
you have to go for that obsessive all-over-composition style in the installation ... also you need typewritten descriptions of the context for each photo
― Suggest Bander-Meinhof Complex (sarahel), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:22 (ten years ago) link
make the stamp say something edgy like "FEMINISM" or "ART" or something
― we like cars, we like cartoons (dyao), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:23 (ten years ago) link
the images will be titled with the content of the stamp.
for example:daisies no. 2chinese character nos. 1-3
― ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:29 (ten years ago) link
maybe you can install them onto a traced map of your city, with push pins, and place them in the locations where the people live or were photographed, and it could be a commentary on gentrification or routes travelled.
― Suggest Bander-Meinhof Complex (sarahel), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:33 (ten years ago) link
I'm trying to combine all the edgy art trends I can think of ...
― Suggest Bander-Meinhof Complex (sarahel), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:34 (ten years ago) link
^feelin this
― ROCK BAND: BORBETOMAGUS (haitch), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:37 (ten years ago) link
http://regretfulmorning.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/dunk-hunt-tramp-stamp.jpg
― ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:40 (ten years ago) link
http://purefnevyl.files.wordpress.com/2007/11/corinthians_tramp_stamp.jpg
― ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:41 (ten years ago) link
http://www.thesicness.com/pics/march09/03072009/tramp_stamp.jpg
― ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:42 (ten years ago) link
I think a pretty funny tramp stamp would be a second asshole
― we like cars, we like cartoons (dyao), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:43 (ten years ago) link
http://rlv.zcache.com/tramp_stamp_inspector_mug-p168228570079141682qzje_400.jpg
― ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:44 (ten years ago) link
u drunk
― a light salad of Adorno, Heidegger, Derrida and Esteban Buttez (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 13:53 (ten years ago) link
Nope and I still stand by that statement.
― \(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 14:05 (ten years ago) link
"dunk hunt"
― Angus Young (roxymuzak), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 17:34 (ten years ago) link
20-something. momus hosts a cooking show called "cumin in a girl's mouth"
― chemical ali v. chemical frazier (m bison), Friday, 16 October 2009 19:56 (ten years ago) link
Writing a letter to the local nursery called Lilliput to say that from the point of view of the children it should be called Brobdingnag.
― The Pingularity (ledge), Sunday, 22 September 2019 10:48 (two months ago) link
:D :D :D :D
― Fox Pithole Britain (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 22 September 2019 11:07 (two months ago) link
A cover version of Manfred Mann's 'Pretty Flamingo' except it's re-titled 'Placido Domingo'.
― just another country (snoball), Saturday, 28 September 2019 18:41 (two months ago) link
An instrument that's a cross between a flute and a trombone, and basically looks like a brass bicycle pump.
― just another country (snoball), Saturday, 28 September 2019 18:42 (two months ago) link
A service that custom-"trombonizes" any musical instrument, installing sliding hardware so that you can telescope it to and fro to change its pitch.
― mick signals, Saturday, 28 September 2019 19:41 (two months ago) link
The Tromboner®
― davey, Saturday, 28 September 2019 20:16 (two months ago) link
How about a guitar with elastic strings and a telescoping neck?
― just another country (snoball), Saturday, 28 September 2019 20:34 (two months ago) link
http://www.steinberger.com/Synapse-Transcale-Integrated-Capo.html
― Instant Carmax (Ye Mad Puffin), Saturday, 28 September 2019 20:45 (two months ago) link
Wow. They've even got a bass one.
― pplains, Saturday, 28 September 2019 22:47 (two months ago) link
Superbone
The Superbone is a hybrid trombone. It has the slide mechanism of a standard trombone and the valve mechanism of a valve trombone.
I should open a shop that sells these, and call it The Superbone Zone.
― just another country (snoball), Saturday, 28 September 2019 22:58 (two months ago) link
olol
take me to The Superbone Zone
― davey, Sunday, 29 September 2019 02:08 (two months ago) link
https://i.imgur.com/AHtBLp8.gif
― pplains, Sunday, 29 September 2019 02:26 (two months ago) link
over the superbone zone, the booblight hovers
― Sally Jessy (Karl Malone), Sunday, 29 September 2019 04:31 (two months ago) link
a different version of golf called "garf." the rules of garf are exactly the same as those of golf, but a much stricter dress code is enforced in all club houses and courses. absolutely no casual wear shall be permitted. the garf itself is playacted in a public park or other open space.
― Tart Prepper (Sufjan Grafton), Monday, 30 September 2019 02:54 (two months ago) link
Jazz Garf in the Park
― Sally Jessy (Karl Malone), Monday, 30 September 2019 03:44 (two months ago) link
I really need a more thorough explanation of garf
― president of deluded fruitcakes anonymous (silby), Monday, 30 September 2019 16:34 (two months ago) link
the world according to
― all over bar the shouting (im here for the shouting) (darraghmac), Monday, 30 September 2019 16:37 (two months ago) link
look, i could try to sell you on garf in this thread all day. but i think it's best we just put on kilts, don our paddy caps, lace up our cleats, grab a club (fallen tree branch), and get garfing. once you make your first solid contact with a garf ball (it is imaginary), you'll be hooked. I shot a miserable 98 this weekend and missed my son's birthday while doing so. the damn garf ball was attracted to hazards (innocent people in the park). but i'd be out there again today if not for this damned desk job (i'd rather be garfing).
― Tart Prepper (Sufjan Grafton), Monday, 30 September 2019 17:01 (two months ago) link
once you make your first solid contact with a garf ball (it is imaginary), you'll be hooked
which you can get lessons to fix
― all over bar the shouting (im here for the shouting) (darraghmac), Monday, 30 September 2019 17:08 (two months ago) link
oh my, i beg your permission to use that one this weekend with the beverage cart driver (a Canada goose)
― Tart Prepper (Sufjan Grafton), Monday, 30 September 2019 17:14 (two months ago) link
xp it actually requires surgery to fix
― It is my great honor to post on this messageboard! (Karl Malone), Monday, 30 September 2019 17:19 (two months ago) link
idgi this sounds basically like miniature garf only bigger?
― The Ravishing of ROFL Stein (Hadrian VIII), Monday, 30 September 2019 17:47 (two months ago) link
sounds to me like frisbee garf but with a ball
― Instant Carmax (Ye Mad Puffin), Monday, 30 September 2019 17:48 (two months ago) link
"Dressed...for the nines."
― weatheringdaleson, Monday, 30 September 2019 17:55 (two months ago) link
https://i.ibb.co/qrx4PNF/60-BA7-C78-36-FC-47-FA-9-C19-CF1-F68-AF10-C8.jpg
― Philip Nunez, Tuesday, 1 October 2019 04:14 (two months ago) link
Start a rap career using the stage name Young MD. Wear scrubs and rap only about medical issues. Eventually form a rap supergroup with Young MA, Young MB*, and Young MC.
*Spotify bio: "Young MB started his career in rap primarily in the year 2017, mainly French rap. Before he saw rap as something that happened with friends soon enough, he found out that it was special and he wanted to share that with the world."
Also in the course of formulating this terrible idea I discovered that there is a rapper out there calling himself Young BM, which is a Terrible Idea.
― Hans Holbein (Chinchilla Volapük), Wednesday, 9 October 2019 07:23 (two months ago) link
A podcast on Web Assembly, called WASMgasm.
― just another country (snoball), Sunday, 3 November 2019 20:12 (one month ago) link
a remake of the TV series Gladiators, but everyone involved has to participate while wearing four inch high heels
― boxedjoy, Monday, 4 November 2019 09:13 (one month ago) link
An 18-track, 180 minute triple live drone album, where each track is a nearly identical 10-minute drone, except that as the drone fades in on the seventh track, there is a brief eruption of "Woooo!" and clapping, from the audience.
― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Thursday, 7 November 2019 15:05 (one month ago) link
Thinking about gold foil on cakes: a dessert for rich folks that contains more in currency than you pay for the dessert. It will be considered to gauche to take any of the money.
― Bidh boladh a' mhairbh de 'n láimh fhalaimh (dowd), Wednesday, 13 November 2019 19:42 (four weeks ago) link
https://www.businessinsider.com/2009/1/rich-people-still-eating-gold
The Emirates Palace hotel in Abu Dhabi reportedly served 11 pounds of edible gold to its guests in 2008, which could have cost as much as $500,000.But they're not the only ones with a gilded tooth.WSJ's Wealth Report blog: [T]he Russians are especially avid consumers of gold, and like to eat it with their caviar and oysters.Plenty of U.S. restaurants serve up gold to those who like to wear their bling on the inside. A New York chef came up with a $1,000 bagel featuring white truffle cream cheese and goji berry-infused Riesling jelly with golden leaves. An L.A. candy maker sells treats called Holiday Nougat, made with flakes of 23-karat edible gold leaf.Stephen Bruce, owner of New York ice cream parlor Serendipity3 famously came up with the $25,000 Frozen Haute Chocolate sundae, covered in 23K edible gold-infused whipped cream.
But they're not the only ones with a gilded tooth.
WSJ's Wealth Report blog: [T]he Russians are especially avid consumers of gold, and like to eat it with their caviar and oysters.
Plenty of U.S. restaurants serve up gold to those who like to wear their bling on the inside. A New York chef came up with a $1,000 bagel featuring white truffle cream cheese and goji berry-infused Riesling jelly with golden leaves. An L.A. candy maker sells treats called Holiday Nougat, made with flakes of 23-karat edible gold leaf.
Stephen Bruce, owner of New York ice cream parlor Serendipity3 famously came up with the $25,000 Frozen Haute Chocolate sundae, covered in 23K edible gold-infused whipped cream.
― Peaceful Warrior I Poser (Karl Malone), Wednesday, 13 November 2019 20:00 (four weeks ago) link
I’m thinking a cake served on a bed of £50 notes.
― Bidh boladh a' mhairbh de 'n láimh fhalaimh (dowd), Wednesday, 13 November 2019 20:04 (four weeks ago) link
Jokes on them, it only costs me a couple of bucks to munch on a shaker-full of metallic jimmies. Or hell, just walk around with a mouthful of pennies if I want a quick fix of that scrumptious metal flavor that human taste buds are primed to enjoy.
― Yul, Tied: A Celebration of Brynner in Bondage (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 13 November 2019 20:07 (four weeks ago) link
An a cappella group that performs only glitch tracks adapted for the human voice. The glitchier and more abstract the better.
― Yul, Tied: A Celebration of Brynner in Bondage (Old Lunch), Thursday, 14 November 2019 13:55 (three weeks ago) link
(Countdown to someone telling me that The Autechrephonics have been a top draw at Michigan State for the past half decade.)
― Yul, Tied: A Celebration of Brynner in Bondage (Old Lunch), Thursday, 14 November 2019 13:58 (three weeks ago) link
I'm only aware of two vocal covers of autechre tracks and they're both compiled from samples rather than sung live, so afaik you're good.
― The Pingularity (ledge), Thursday, 14 November 2019 14:07 (three weeks ago) link
nicotine pez
― mh, Thursday, 14 November 2019 16:14 (three weeks ago) link
The Emirates Palace hotel in Abu Dhabi reportedly served 11 pounds of edible gold to its guests in 2008, which could have cost as much as $500,000.
feel like a motivated plumber with a terrible idea could make some bank here
― actor Robert de Niro disguised as an Uzbek homeopath (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 14 November 2019 16:21 (three weeks ago) link
impossible gazelle. a meatless full sized gazelle you eat directly with your face.
― $1,000,000 or 1 bag of honeycrisp apples (Sufjan Grafton), Saturday, 23 November 2019 03:52 (two weeks ago) link
Does it matter which part of my face
― War Crimes Tribunal of the Network Stars (Old Lunch), Saturday, 23 November 2019 04:49 (two weeks ago) link
Beyond Face. a meatless face made primarily of pea-protein
― Suggest Banshee (Hadrian VIII), Saturday, 23 November 2019 05:05 (two weeks ago) link
Creating an @ILX0R twitter account and posting the password for it on here, so everyone can use it.
― Le Bateau Ivre, Tuesday, 3 December 2019 21:29 (one week ago) link
better than posting the password would be building an integration into the forum software that'd let us all post to it, with like an extra box under the comment box
― Swilling Ambergris, Esq. (silby), Tuesday, 3 December 2019 21:51 (one week ago) link
Even better would be an amendment to the forum software that automatically tweets every non-77 post, because anyone anywhere on the internet can see it on ILX anyway, right? Right???
― just another country (snoball), Tuesday, 3 December 2019 22:02 (one week ago) link
lol didn't lag∞n make a blog that was populated by people posting to a thread at one point? we could do that, but twitter
― mh, Tuesday, 3 December 2019 22:46 (one week ago) link
he did it was cool
― Swilling Ambergris, Esq. (silby), Tuesday, 3 December 2019 22:46 (one week ago) link
He did and it was a work of art.
― Le Bateau Ivre, Tuesday, 3 December 2019 22:49 (one week ago) link
I remember being rude and breaking it. What was I thinking?
― mh, Tuesday, 3 December 2019 22:56 (one week ago) link
https://twitter.com/ilxor_txt
― pplains, Wednesday, 4 December 2019 01:42 (one week ago) link
everyone should be able to read everyone else's email at work
― Swilling Ambergris, Esq. (silby), Wednesday, 11 December 2019 00:15 (five hours ago) link