your terrible ideas

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1. An adaptation of Blood Meridian scored by Def Leppard

real men love cheeses (latebloomer), Saturday, 4 July 2009 06:07 (thirteen years ago) link

2. I'll move to San Francisco
3. Make a monster costume out of a dirty shag rug
4. Mobile DJ at English pub in a town an hour away using a PA I've never used

bamcquern, Saturday, 4 July 2009 06:25 (thirteen years ago) link

5. date down

carpathian florist (roxymuzak), Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:08 (thirteen years ago) link

6. date

what a delightfully quirky new voice! (bug), Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:10 (thirteen years ago) link

1. An adaptation of Blood Meridian scored by Def Leppard

7. An adaption of The Mikado done entirely using mobile ringtones.

snoball, Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:30 (thirteen years ago) link

8. a book about combat rock compared/contrasted with the 1982 worlds fair

carpathian florist (roxymuzak), Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:38 (thirteen years ago) link

9. (another music one, but that's what I save most of my truly bad ideas for) An album made entirely using samples from Lou Reed's "Metal Machine Music" and Presley's "Having Fun With Elvis On Stage" (because they are supposedly the worst two albums ever made - my theory being that I could make an even worse-er album by combining them).

snoball, Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:44 (thirteen years ago) link

10. putting chilli sauce on vanilla ice cream - one mouthful was enough to cause projectile vomiting.

snoball, Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:46 (thirteen years ago) link

11. marinara sauce and peanut butter

what a delightfully quirky new voice! (bug), Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:56 (thirteen years ago) link

12. Going back to school.

Turkoglu & Love Affair (Clay), Saturday, 4 July 2009 09:03 (thirteen years ago) link

nah, that's a great idea.

what a delightfully quirky new voice! (bug), Saturday, 4 July 2009 09:55 (thirteen years ago) link

13. Starting the thread "What does 'rockist' mean?"

bamcquern, Saturday, 4 July 2009 16:05 (thirteen years ago) link

14. A pop group exclusively made up of 2 year olds called Diaper Rash.

real men love cheeses (latebloomer), Saturday, 4 July 2009 16:09 (thirteen years ago) link

13. Starting the thread "What does 'rockist' mean?"

― bamcquern, Saturday, July 4, 2009 11:05 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark

if your original post was a gigantic picture of goatse with an embedded sound clip of, i dunno, somebody having explosive diarrhea or something, then it'd be a pretty great idea

what a delightfully quirky new voice! (bug), Saturday, 4 July 2009 17:28 (thirteen years ago) link

15. deciding you wanna ride a goddamn ferris wheel

16. 1p3

a poppy seed NAGL (J0rdan S.), Saturday, 4 July 2009 17:46 (thirteen years ago) link

rong

two months pass...

17. Sell white rice dyed brown to exploit gullible newcomers to the health food world (long time health food consumers would probably see right through the scam.) The brand would be called "Rice that is Brown" rather than "So-and-So brown rice" and list the ingredients in super timy print.

latebloomer, Friday, 11 September 2009 02:29 (thirteen years ago) link

eh..tiny print

latebloomer, Friday, 11 September 2009 02:30 (thirteen years ago) link

haha the next step would be "Rice that is Multiethnic" and it would just be bag of Fruity Pebbles.

we like cars, we like cartoons (dyao), Friday, 11 September 2009 02:37 (thirteen years ago) link

would that actually like... save you any money?

mountain G.O.A.T. (s1ocki), Friday, 11 September 2009 03:32 (thirteen years ago) link

slocki you don't get it--IT'S A TERRIBLE IDEA!

ian, Friday, 11 September 2009 06:36 (thirteen years ago) link

1. An adaptation of Blood Meridian scored by Def Leppard

7. An adaption of The Mikado done entirely using mobile ringtones.

18. an adaptation of Do You Remember Love?/Macross for the musical theater/broadway stage.

tehresa, Friday, 11 September 2009 07:08 (thirteen years ago) link

maybe less terrible and more so not gonna happen why bc i am lazy

tehresa, Friday, 11 September 2009 07:08 (thirteen years ago) link

im dying over rice that is brown

Angus Young (roxymuzak), Monday, 14 September 2009 12:04 (thirteen years ago) link

19. Putting a book of my poetry out
20. Taking up a drug habit on the back of the highly unlikely profits from this anthology of work (any suggestions for the drugs?)

Don't Be A Ned Raggett (King Boy Pato), Monday, 14 September 2009 12:09 (thirteen years ago) link

idk I've actually been pretty impressed with yr writing. Honestly.

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Monday, 14 September 2009 16:59 (thirteen years ago) link

21. Combination mezzuzah and bottle opener, so you're never at a loss with a cold beer in your hand.

that stupid-ass cannibal pen-pal of yours (Laurel), Monday, 14 September 2009 17:03 (thirteen years ago) link

(xxpost) not my terrible idea, but someone once suggested to me, in all seriousness, that I become a smack head in order to guarantee that I could continue to claim benefits.

a gift from your mind in the form of the perfect beat (snoball), Monday, 14 September 2009 17:04 (thirteen years ago) link

patoetry plzzz

jergins, Monday, 14 September 2009 17:06 (thirteen years ago) link

art project involving tramp stamps, semen and polaroid camera.

ian, Monday, 14 September 2009 17:31 (thirteen years ago) link

A Terrible Plan!

velko, Monday, 14 September 2009 17:35 (thirteen years ago) link

tramp stamps on actual tramps

fountain bleaut (s1ocki), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:15 (thirteen years ago) link

like, hoboes

fountain bleaut (s1ocki), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:15 (thirteen years ago) link

i thought it would be great an edgy brooklyn gallery! you know, like, transgressive sexuality & the mainstream appeal of defacing the body. or something.

ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:19 (thirteen years ago) link

you have to go for that obsessive all-over-composition style in the installation ... also you need typewritten descriptions of the context for each photo

Suggest Bander-Meinhof Complex (sarahel), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:22 (thirteen years ago) link

make the stamp say something edgy like "FEMINISM" or "ART" or something

we like cars, we like cartoons (dyao), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:23 (thirteen years ago) link

the images will be titled with the content of the stamp.

for example:
daisies no. 2
chinese character nos. 1-3

ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:29 (thirteen years ago) link

maybe you can install them onto a traced map of your city, with push pins, and place them in the locations where the people live or were photographed, and it could be a commentary on gentrification or routes travelled.

Suggest Bander-Meinhof Complex (sarahel), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:33 (thirteen years ago) link

I'm trying to combine all the edgy art trends I can think of ...

Suggest Bander-Meinhof Complex (sarahel), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:34 (thirteen years ago) link

^feelin this

ROCK BAND: BORBETOMAGUS (haitch), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:37 (thirteen years ago) link

http://regretfulmorning.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/dunk-hunt-tramp-stamp.jpg

ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:40 (thirteen years ago) link

http://purefnevyl.files.wordpress.com/2007/11/corinthians_tramp_stamp.jpg

ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:41 (thirteen years ago) link

http://www.thesicness.com/pics/march09/03072009/tramp_stamp.jpg

ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:42 (thirteen years ago) link

I think a pretty funny tramp stamp would be a second asshole

we like cars, we like cartoons (dyao), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:43 (thirteen years ago) link

http://rlv.zcache.com/tramp_stamp_inspector_mug-p168228570079141682qzje_400.jpg

ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:44 (thirteen years ago) link

idk I've actually been pretty impressed with yr writing. Honestly.

u drunk

a light salad of Adorno, Heidegger, Derrida and Esteban Buttez (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 13:53 (thirteen years ago) link

Nope and I still stand by that statement.

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 14:05 (thirteen years ago) link

"dunk hunt"

Angus Young (roxymuzak), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 17:34 (thirteen years ago) link

one month passes...

20-something. momus hosts a cooking show called "cumin in a girl's mouth"

chemical ali v. chemical frazier (m bison), Friday, 16 October 2009 19:56 (twelve years ago) link

In light of the horrifying SCOTUS news this week, a terrible idea for an exploitation style flick popped into my head:

The year is 2023, and the only thing that can stop the fascists is...

A GOOD BABY WITH A GUN

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Saturday, 25 June 2022 00:02 (three months ago) link

Tagline: "It's not just my diaper that's loaded."

Nutellanor Roosevelt (Ye Mad Puffin), Saturday, 25 June 2022 00:06 (three months ago) link

A vegan option called the "Sloppy Jane"

immodesty blaise (jimbeaux), Saturday, 25 June 2022 00:10 (three months ago) link

A shards of glass sandwich for supreme court justices called the "sloppy jane"

Herby Dutch Baby (Sufjan Grafton), Saturday, 25 June 2022 04:22 (three months ago) link

wrong thread

budo jeru, Saturday, 25 June 2022 04:47 (three months ago) link

In light of all of these rugged online menswear brands (Buck Mason, Mack Weldon, Taylor Stitch) I was thinking there should be an online brand of pants called "Dick Outlynes"

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Thursday, 30 June 2022 21:12 (three months ago) link

Five ZZ Top tribute bands that are each named after one of the other quarks (up, down, charm, strange, and bottom). Each band is themed after the quark it's named after.

Being cheap is expensive (snoball), Friday, 1 July 2022 17:58 (three months ago) link

A videogame themed bar that only serves shots, called First Person Shooter.
A videogame themed bar that only serves shots - but whatever you order, the bartender gives the shot to someone else and you have to watch them down it while looking over their shoulder from five metres away - called Third Person Shooter.

Being cheap is expensive (snoball), Saturday, 2 July 2022 13:16 (three months ago) link

eminem opens a bar next to his (vilely named) restaurant, "Mom's Spaghetti."

The bar's schtick is that you only get one shot.

Like, really, you try to order another shot (or two shots at a time) and the bartender says "you only get one shot."

Nutellanor Roosevelt (Ye Mad Puffin), Saturday, 2 July 2022 21:24 (three months ago) link

"Aw, man, why do we have to be Bottom Quark?"

immodesty blaise (jimbeaux), Saturday, 2 July 2022 21:29 (three months ago) link

flying for the first time in years last month made me want to make a bunch of those dumb joe biden "i did that!" stickers that idiots put on gas pumps, but with pictures of bin laden and the shoe bomber for people to stick on all the TSA screening machines.

joygoat, Sunday, 3 July 2022 14:28 (three months ago) link

xxp and next to the bar there's a shop that sells trombones so you don't miss your chance to blow.

Being cheap is expensive (snoball), Sunday, 3 July 2022 15:00 (three months ago) link

A Boris Johnson themed driving school called Them's The Brakes.

Being cheap is expensive (snoball), Saturday, 9 July 2022 17:51 (two months ago) link

xxp and next to the bar there's a shop that sells trombones so you don't miss your chance to blow.

― Being cheap is expensive (snoball), Sunday, July 3, 2022 10:00 AM (six days ago) bookmarkflaglink

Or a glory hole in the bathroom that says this

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Saturday, 9 July 2022 19:09 (two months ago) link

truck vulvas

i REFUSE to pay for my own cbd (cat), Saturday, 9 July 2022 19:32 (two months ago) link

I just heard about “How to Build a Sex Room” on Netflix and now I think I want “This Old House…After Dark”

john shopkins (naus), Monday, 11 July 2022 04:15 (two months ago) link

Like how to properly install a mirrored ceiling and why you might not wanna use drywall anchors for that contraption

john shopkins (naus), Monday, 11 July 2022 04:18 (two months ago) link

naus. Homie. "This Old House Party" is what you need.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GB2enUa177g

Nutellanor Roosevelt (Ye Mad Puffin), Tuesday, 12 July 2022 02:45 (two months ago) link

That was great!

john shopkins (naus), Tuesday, 12 July 2022 20:31 (two months ago) link

two weeks pass...

a bakery / deli called Schmearway to Levain

budo jeru, Monday, 1 August 2022 15:10 (two months ago) link

I just heard about “How to Build a Sex Room” on Netflix and now I think I want “This Old House…After Dark”

― john shopkins (naus), Monday, July 11, 2022 12:15 AM bookmarkflaglink

lol, one of my main notes after watching the show was that i wish the host did more Bob Villa type stuff. "how's this st. andrew's cross coming along, alex?" "it's looking pretty good, as you can see we've located the wall studs and marked them in pencil, and that's really important because we want to make sure there's no chance of this thing coming loose..." etc.

Doctor Casino, Wednesday, 3 August 2022 12:14 (two months ago) link

"I've got this lock on the cage hooked up to the solar panels. Soon as it sees daylight, it unlocks itself. We're just having a little fun here."

"Well how come you don't just connect it to something like Google Home? That way, you can just pop it open at 6 a.m. or whenever."

"Not liking that, Bob. Trying to stay off the grid here."

pplains, Wednesday, 3 August 2022 13:24 (two months ago) link

three weeks pass...

cyberpunk remake of The Lost Boys titled The Lost Bots.

peace, man, Wednesday, 24 August 2022 19:58 (one month ago) link

in order to properly gauge the terribleness of this idea we must know whether there are vampire robots involved

packed plastic baskets (cat), Thursday, 25 August 2022 03:00 (one month ago) link

a true crime documentary that is actually a live stream of someone just committing crimes live, and interviewing people immediately after committing the crime, like how they felt being robbed

Toonie Orlando (Neanderthal), Thursday, 25 August 2022 03:01 (one month ago) link

The Discreet Charm of the Bourgeoisie, rebooted as a dating-on-an-island reality competition show.

Doctor Casino, Sunday, 28 August 2022 04:01 (one month ago) link

A modern dance version of the Twilight saga, choreographed by Twyla Tharp.

Twylight

gin and tonic the hedgehog (Ye Mad Puffin), Tuesday, 30 August 2022 00:20 (one month ago) link

In 2022, Chubby Checker releases a comeback record of covers done in his typical style: "Simple Twist of Fate", "Twist in My Sobriety", "Playground Twist", etc etc.

Halfway there but for you, Wednesday, 31 August 2022 14:54 (one month ago) link

In 2023, disgraced lead singer of Arcade Fire releases a comeback record of Bowie covers: All you have to do is Win.

Halfway there but for you, Friday, 2 September 2022 00:32 (one month ago) link

A mash up of the Red Hot Chilli Peppers' 'Give It Away' and the theme tune from Spongebob Squarepants played backwards.

Being cheap is expensive (snoball), Tuesday, 6 September 2022 18:33 (one month ago) link

ban Greta Van Fleet

Mr Haaland's Opus (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 6 September 2022 18:34 (one month ago) link

That's actually a good idea.

immodesty blaise (jimbeaux), Tuesday, 6 September 2022 18:54 (one month ago) link

should ukraine invade russia POLL

the late great, Sunday, 11 September 2022 14:53 (three weeks ago) link

i will queue to see the queen and sell you my place at £1 for every minute i've waited. as soon as i get a taker i'll walk to the back and start again.

koogs, Thursday, 15 September 2022 11:10 (three weeks ago) link

You could be undercharging: https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2022/may/05/a-five-day-wait-for-5000-the-man-who-queues-for-the-uber-rich

ledge, Thursday, 15 September 2022 11:22 (three weeks ago) link

oh wait it's a 24 hour a day gig - ok the price could be right.

ledge, Thursday, 15 September 2022 11:23 (three weeks ago) link

i'd literally set my own hours

koogs, Thursday, 15 September 2022 11:30 (three weeks ago) link

VR coffin experience in the metaverse. in real time.

koogs, Thursday, 15 September 2022 15:10 (three weeks ago) link

https://i.imgur.com/JQqr1LE.jpg

Karl Malone, Thursday, 15 September 2022 15:16 (three weeks ago) link

a boutique company that makes USA-made, solid-wood furniture in custom "relic" paint jobs to look like the tired, broken, mass-market Ikea and Target furniture you find in thrift stores.

budo jeru, Thursday, 15 September 2022 17:50 (three weeks ago) link

some sort of hybrid of jenga and poker where every time you bet you have to add your oddly shaped chips to the increasingly precarious stack in the middle of the table. I haven't exactly worked out the rules yet.

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Saturday, 17 September 2022 22:29 (two weeks ago) link

I call it....Joker

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Sunday, 18 September 2022 20:26 (two weeks ago) link

great name

Karl Malone, Sunday, 18 September 2022 20:36 (two weeks ago) link

what about Pingu tho

assert (matttkkkk), Sunday, 18 September 2022 22:50 (two weeks ago) link

vacuum hockey tables

put their faith in a god-fearing man selling them tiny homes (Sufjan Grafton), Thursday, 29 September 2022 20:30 (one week ago) link

how does a vacuum hockey table work

Karl Malone, Thursday, 29 September 2022 20:32 (one week ago) link

2 people scraping at the puck with all of their strength, trying to move it even 1 inch

put their faith in a god-fearing man selling them tiny homes (Sufjan Grafton), Thursday, 29 September 2022 20:56 (one week ago) link

Announcing debt relief then saying some with private lenders don’t qualify.

sweating like Cathy *aaaack* (Boring, Maryland), Thursday, 29 September 2022 22:39 (one week ago) link

oh, i play that game. it's called "try to pick up a wet noodle off of the floor"

it's IMPOSSIBLE

xp

Karl Malone, Thursday, 29 September 2022 22:40 (one week ago) link

Belt Sanding Baseball

stank viola (Neanderthal), Thursday, 29 September 2022 22:47 (one week ago) link


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