your terrible ideas

1. An adaptation of Blood Meridian scored by Def Leppard

2. I'll move to San Francisco
3. Make a monster costume out of a dirty shag rug
4. Mobile DJ at English pub in a town an hour away using a PA I've never used

5. date down

6. date

1. An adaptation of Blood Meridian scored by Def Leppard

7. An adaption of The Mikado done entirely using mobile ringtones.

8. a book about combat rock compared/contrasted with the 1982 worlds fair

9. (another music one, but that's what I save most of my truly bad ideas for) An album made entirely using samples from Lou Reed's "Metal Machine Music" and Presley's "Having Fun With Elvis On Stage" (because they are supposedly the worst two albums ever made - my theory being that I could make an even worse-er album by combining them).

10. putting chilli sauce on vanilla ice cream - one mouthful was enough to cause projectile vomiting.

11. marinara sauce and peanut butter

12. Going back to school.

nah, that's a great idea.

13. Starting the thread "What does 'rockist' mean?"

14. A pop group exclusively made up of 2 year olds called Diaper Rash.

13. Starting the thread "What does 'rockist' mean?"

― bamcquern, Saturday, July 4, 2009 11:05 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark

if your original post was a gigantic picture of goatse with an embedded sound clip of, i dunno, somebody having explosive diarrhea or something, then it'd be a pretty great idea

15. deciding you wanna ride a goddamn ferris wheel

16. 1p3

rong

17. Sell white rice dyed brown to exploit gullible newcomers to the health food world (long time health food consumers would probably see right through the scam.) The brand would be called "Rice that is Brown" rather than "So-and-So brown rice" and list the ingredients in super timy print.

eh..tiny print

haha the next step would be "Rice that is Multiethnic" and it would just be bag of Fruity Pebbles.

would that actually like... save you any money?

slocki you don't get it--IT'S A TERRIBLE IDEA!

1. An adaptation of Blood Meridian scored by Def Leppard

7. An adaption of The Mikado done entirely using mobile ringtones.

18. an adaptation of Do You Remember Love?/Macross for the musical theater/broadway stage.

maybe less terrible and more so not gonna happen why bc i am lazy

im dying over rice that is brown

19. Putting a book of my poetry out
20. Taking up a drug habit on the back of the highly unlikely profits from this anthology of work (any suggestions for the drugs?)

idk I've actually been pretty impressed with yr writing. Honestly.

21. Combination mezzuzah and bottle opener, so you're never at a loss with a cold beer in your hand.

(xxpost) not my terrible idea, but someone once suggested to me, in all seriousness, that I become a smack head in order to guarantee that I could continue to claim benefits.

patoetry plzzz

art project involving tramp stamps, semen and polaroid camera.

A Terrible Plan!

tramp stamps on actual tramps

like, hoboes

i thought it would be great an edgy brooklyn gallery! you know, like, transgressive sexuality & the mainstream appeal of defacing the body. or something.

you have to go for that obsessive all-over-composition style in the installation ... also you need typewritten descriptions of the context for each photo

make the stamp say something edgy like "FEMINISM" or "ART" or something

the images will be titled with the content of the stamp.

for example:
daisies no. 2
chinese character nos. 1-3

maybe you can install them onto a traced map of your city, with push pins, and place them in the locations where the people live or were photographed, and it could be a commentary on gentrification or routes travelled.

I'm trying to combine all the edgy art trends I can think of ...

^feelin this

http://regretfulmorning.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/dunk-hunt-tramp-stamp.jpg

http://purefnevyl.files.wordpress.com/2007/11/corinthians_tramp_stamp.jpg

http://www.thesicness.com/pics/march09/03072009/tramp_stamp.jpg

I think a pretty funny tramp stamp would be a second asshole

http://rlv.zcache.com/tramp_stamp_inspector_mug-p168228570079141682qzje_400.jpg

idk I've actually been pretty impressed with yr writing. Honestly.

u drunk

Nope and I still stand by that statement.

"dunk hunt"

20-something. momus hosts a cooking show called "cumin in a girl's mouth"

a documentary detailing the history of the "check engine" light. we slowly learn that nobody knows where it came from -- it just began to show up in cars one day. and nobody knows what it means. mechanics fix it by calling a phone number. on the other end, a voice demands a task be carried out or a sacrifice in exchange for turning off the light.

A television dramedy titled "Shy Barabbas". Barabbas is shy and finds the loneliness excruciating. But he just can't work up the courage to make new friends. As a fed up adult, he finally makes an attempt, posting fliers around town. The fliers describe Barabbas' interests and promote a meeting of likeminded individuals. At the meeting, Barabbas is arrested by the Romans and sentenced to death as an insurrectionist. On Passover, Barabbas is overwhelmed by the support from a massive crowd, begging Pontius Pilate to free him. "We want Barabbas!" It's happening. They must have read his flier, and now Barabbas has found his friends. After he is freed and despite the recent frenzied chanting for his release, nobody from the crowd pays him any attention. They aren't so interested in Barabbas -- they really just wanted to murder Christ. Suppose this thing would run on AMC or something.

15 episode season. first episode would release week of christmas and reveal Barabbas as the little drummer boy.

As part of his run portraying as many iconic older white male Americans as possible, Tom Hanks stars as the titular director in forthcoming biopic Lynch.

I fear that I may have made that happen just by putting it out in the world, and I deeply apologize.

I initially thought of Vacceine (a caffeinated vaccine) but I figured why half-ass it and so now I'm proud to introduce Monster Energy Vax.

Breakin' Bad

A mash-up of Breakin' and Breaking Bad. I haven't really worked much of it out yet.

Better Call Soul

Jamie Foxx dies and comes back at Jimmy McGill, a lawyer who learns the secret of jazz to come back to life and defeat his electricity fearing brother. The jazz is fusion obv.

Or something, I never finished Soul or BCS.

I guess Walter White, but instead of meth, breakdancing, is enough of a concept.

Breakin' Bad is a pretty good terrible idea, but it sounds mainly like a launch pad for the inevitable (and necessary) sequel, Breakin' Bad II: Narcotic Boogaloo.

A tribute band named Bygone Errors, which plays only monophonic PC speaker music and sounds from the 1980s, on the original hardware.

A parody cover version of Marc Cohn's 'Walking In Memphis' called 'Corporate Memphis' about the currently popular corporate website style.

that could potentially get at least a few youtube clicks/shares/tweets/blorps

Well it was Corporate Memphis
Flat faceless dudes making business deals
It was just Corporate Memphis
I have at last forgotten how to feel

Breakin' Bad is a pretty good terrible idea, but it sounds mainly like a launch pad for the inevitable (and necessary) sequel, Breakin' Bad II: Narcotic Boogaloo.

― Condé Nasty (Ye Mad Puffin), Wednesday, 7 April 2021 14:46 (two hours ago) link

"I am the one who locks"

lol

hoo boy

SAY MY NAME
"boogaloo shrimp"
YOU'RE GODDAM RIGHT

a dating app for cinephiles. no names ages or genders displayed (in the free version), just your top 10 movies.

― stylish but illegal (Simon H.), Tuesday, January 26, 2021 10:18 PM (two months ago) bookmarkflaglink

What hath ILX wrought?

Vinylly

https://www.phoenixnewtimes.com/music/dating-app-vinylly-matches-people-according-to-their-taste-in-music-11515428

I want there to be a thing where over the next six months ton of super cheesy airbrushed pixelated bad typography images of DMX and Prince Philip together in heaven start to show up seemingly out of nowhere.

Images of them with halos and a fuzzy glow, drawn in the style of the "jesus, with you always" images, going fishing together or just hanging out and laughing like they both knew it was their destiny to be together forever in the afterlife and that a whole lot of people around the world believed this strongly enough that they made their own images to celebrate it finally happening.

Then six months later to craft some sort of insane conspiracy about this and get the q folks riled up and focusing on it.

Advert for Heinz Mayonnaise now with 50% extra free:
Just a guy squeezing a trail of mayonnaise out the bottle along the pavement as he walks home from the shop saying "I've actually got too much"

Ha ha ha"heinz mayonaise: it's up to you what you do with the other half" and it's just a stocky bloke giving it a lengthy squeeze into a river.

Okay no idea that made me laugh that hard can be that terrible.

Heinz makes mayonnaise?

in this imaginary world where one can have too much mayonnaise

I have some in my fridge

i don't think i've ever bought a jar of mayonnaise.

Squeezy bottles = the future of mayo

The present, even.

The future of mayo is aerosol cans.

Pre-mayonnaised bread slices

The other week in the supermarket I saw squeezy sauerkraut -and- squeezy sauerkraut combined with mustard!

I draw the line at squeezy Marmite.
Heinz mayo tastes weirdly of salad cream iirc? Yet is not actual Salad Cream.

my housemate is allergic to loads of things and reckons the Heinz variety is bad for him while cheap Lidl mayo is fine; he reckons there's more mustard int he Heinz stuff

speaking of mayonnaise. the idea of a "famous pimento cheese sandwich" is terrible. but it also works as a symbol of what The Masters is. an exclusive 'tradition' surrounding an experience that is ultimately a shredded cheddar and mayo mixture on wonderbread.

when you become president you get a free, endless supply of fried bologna

Reaction videos for books. Just some person reading a book and going "woah" or "yuck" or whatever and occasionally stopping to explain how they really liked that paragraph they just read.

Teens read "The Waste Land" for the first time

I was thinking about my reaction videos for books idea and was wondering if it would work better with audiobooks and then I'm thinking well that would basically just be audio commentaries for audio books and then it struck that the most terrible idea would probably be video commentaries for audio books which I guess is something like a music video except it's for an audio book

Would you have, like, more than one teen reading the book at the same time? So the faster reader gets to a certain part a bit sooner than the other?

silverfish i really like where this idea is going

there could also be reaction books for books. and it's just a photocopy of the book with writing all over it. like when somebody underlines a sentence fragment and writes "wow!" in the margin.

all proceeds to the reactor of course

oh nice, like irl comments on books!

very vintage, analog-feel

comments on books me, please

one in every ten vaccines should contain nutrients that make your farts smell like bakery fresh muffins

Pre-mayonnaised bread slices
― "The Pus/Worm" by The Smiths (hardcore dilettante)

welp, i gotta go to bed. there's nothing left to see today

A mash up of the weeknd’s star boy and the untitled goose game