wtf, CNN.com

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Live Developing Story: Pelican stuck in a tree in Florida.

HI DERE, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:18 (fifteen years ago) link

pelicans are v v important

gabbneb, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:19 (fifteen years ago) link

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3047/2456224307_3fdd3938bb_o.jpg

HI DERE, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:19 (fifteen years ago) link

lol

gabbneb, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:20 (fifteen years ago) link

in soviet russia trees get stuck up pelicans

DG, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:20 (fifteen years ago) link

"We're Sending Our Love Up a Tree"

Ned Raggett, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:21 (fifteen years ago) link

If it trees, it leads.

kingfish, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:22 (fifteen years ago) link

can somebody summarize this thread for me - is there a pelican stuck up a tree in Florida

J0hn D., Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:23 (fifteen years ago) link

stay classy, cnn.com

Tracer Hand, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:23 (fifteen years ago) link

the chicago band?

cutty, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:23 (fifteen years ago) link

what about their new t-shirt feature? I was going to post yesterday that I could get a lovely shirt with a headline about a dead child

akm, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:24 (fifteen years ago) link

Other currently developing love stories that apparently weren't important enough to be marked as the top story:

National Day on Prayer
Democrats on Iraq
McCain campaigns in Cleveland

HI DERE, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:24 (fifteen years ago) link

http://img33.picoodle.com/img/img33/4/5/1/f_treem_29b6a94.jpg

I DIED, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:25 (fifteen years ago) link

I was going to post yesterday that I could get a lovely shirt with a headline about a dead child

Very Butthole Surfers.

Ned Raggett, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:25 (fifteen years ago) link

roffle

gabbneb, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:25 (fifteen years ago) link

there should be an all-pelican-and-grapefruit channel

gabbneb, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:25 (fifteen years ago) link

I DIED OTM. I await Obama's book about the experience.

Ned Raggett, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:25 (fifteen years ago) link

Comment submitted to be read live on-air:

I, for one, would like to know the pelican's position on the gas tax holiday.

HI DERE, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:28 (fifteen years ago) link

the audacity of trees

mookieproof, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:28 (fifteen years ago) link

if u dont care about pelicans then u are letting the terrists win.

ian, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:32 (fifteen years ago) link

the audacity of trees

That could seriously be a Pelican album title.

Ned Raggett, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:32 (fifteen years ago) link

what are the pelican's flaws?

Alex in Baltimore, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:32 (fifteen years ago) link

gets stuck in trees

I DIED, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:33 (fifteen years ago) link

how does an creature granted with the gift of flight get stuck in a tree? is it lazy?

kingfish, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:37 (fifteen years ago) link

an -> a

kingfish, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:37 (fifteen years ago) link

i think we all need to know what pelican's pastor thinks.

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:40 (fifteen years ago) link

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3068/2457097242_ed0e27107c_o.jpg

UPDATE

HI DERE, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:41 (fifteen years ago) link

The full context is super-roffly; look at the videos they decided not to lead with in favor of the pelican story:

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3123/2457097264_932e6aa5e3_o.jpg

HI DERE, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:42 (fifteen years ago) link

By the time this is all done the bill is going to be huge.

DJ Mencap, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:42 (fifteen years ago) link

lolololol they are now showing Obama speaking about race and the economy, still under the headline "Pelican stuck in tree"

HI DERE, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:43 (fifteen years ago) link

omgosh

Surmounter, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:44 (fifteen years ago) link

bah, they fixed it

HI DERE, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:44 (fifteen years ago) link

I can't imagine being the editor that said "let's go with the tree pelican over BABIES TOSSED OFF 50-FOOT TOWER FOR LUCK"

I DIED, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:44 (fifteen years ago) link

lolololol they are now showing Obama speaking about race and the economy, still under the headline "Pelican stuck in tree"

NEW CAMPAIGN METAPHOR

I DIED, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:45 (fifteen years ago) link

Guys, it's contagious: as I'm typing this, the BBC (BBC 2 TV) have a graphologist analyzing this year's Snooker world championship quarter finalists' handwriting.

StanM, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:49 (fifteen years ago) link

Recuers?

Tracer Hand, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:50 (fifteen years ago) link

baby tossing footage is mind-blowing

"no, no, no oh shit they're not really oh shit they are HEY THAT LOOKS LIKE FUN"

milo z, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:51 (fifteen years ago) link

the bouncing, not the dropping

milo z, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:51 (fifteen years ago) link

Which would you rather do this weekend?
Play "Grand Theft Auto IV" 8%
Watch "Iron Man" 15%
Both 4%
Neither 72%

James Mitchell, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:57 (fifteen years ago) link

lol, CNN.com didn't count on the silent "Not A Big Fucking Nerd" majority

HI DERE, Thursday, 1 May 2008 14:58 (fifteen years ago) link

Which would you rather do this weekend?
Get stuck in tree 8%
Drop babies for luck 15%
17 minutes, 4 seconds - no breathing 4%
Don't let a hospital kill you 72%

I DIED, Thursday, 1 May 2008 15:01 (fifteen years ago) link

WHO RECUE ME FROM HOSPITAL DEATH?

Abbott, Thursday, 1 May 2008 15:28 (fifteen years ago) link

So is the pelican okay? PLZ let me know soon cause I gotta go camp out for Iron Man tix...

Viceroy, Thursday, 1 May 2008 15:34 (fifteen years ago) link

Sign up for instant pelican updates on your phone and you'll not have to worry.

Ned Raggett, Thursday, 1 May 2008 15:35 (fifteen years ago) link

Opportunity!

Firefox can't find the server at www.treestrandedpelican.com

Ned Raggett, Thursday, 1 May 2008 15:36 (fifteen years ago) link

I just searched for news on the pelican because I'm on the edge of my seat here. All I found was this thread.

ENBB, Thursday, 1 May 2008 15:36 (fifteen years ago) link

Is SOMEONE chucking live fish up to it? Please, a firefighter helicopter needs to drop buckets of live fish over this tree.

Abbott, Thursday, 1 May 2008 15:37 (fifteen years ago) link

Prosty the Spokesgland

Abbott, Thursday, 1 May 2008 15:37 (fifteen years ago) link

Pelican Prosty

Ned Raggett, Thursday, 1 May 2008 15:41 (fifteen years ago) link

the stranded spokesfowl

Abbott, Thursday, 1 May 2008 15:43 (fifteen years ago) link

http://www.cnn.com/2017/03/13/health/abortion-texas-lawmaker-trnd/?iid=ob_lockedrail_topeditorial

like "ok haha" yes technically the byline is correct but doesn't reflect the actual satirical intent of the bill, meaning a buncha "omg America is so stupid" yuk yuks will share this tonight without reading it.

waht, I am true black metal worrior (Neanderthal), Monday, 20 March 2017 21:58 (six years ago) link

two months pass...

man can't believe he got a DUI and killed a zookeeper in the same week

http://i63.tinypic.com/3130l1w.png

Charles "Butt" Stanton (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 30 May 2017 02:48 (six years ago) link

Did I seriously just load the tinypic 404 graphic on a fresh post in 2017

El Tomboto, Tuesday, 30 May 2017 02:51 (six years ago) link

http://i68.tinypic.com/veveza.jpg

Charles "Butt" Stanton (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 30 May 2017 02:52 (six years ago) link

Great use of filling 16x9 frame centered on 1x1 image.

pplains, Tuesday, 30 May 2017 03:11 (six years ago) link

different Tiger kills zookeeper? xpost

StanM, Friday, 2 June 2017 11:16 (six years ago) link

two weeks pass...

A veggie by any other name may actually get eaten
Not eating enough fruit led to to an estimated 7.5% diet-related cardiometabolic deaths in 2012, the researchers said in a recent study in JAMA. Two servings of fruit are recommended each day. A serving would equal one whole fruit, such as an entire banana, or one cup equivalent.

One-month sugar detox: Here's how to do it

Einstein, Kazanga, Sitar (abanana), Tuesday, 20 June 2017 10:26 (six years ago) link

eight months pass...

Analysis: Kushner's fall from Secretary of Everything to ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

omar little, Wednesday, 28 February 2018 16:52 (five years ago) link

Hahahaha wait

Embalming is a flirty business (DJP), Wednesday, 28 February 2018 18:22 (five years ago) link

Analysis: Time to send Congress a message t('_'t)

omar little, Wednesday, 28 February 2018 18:24 (five years ago) link

two weeks pass...

McCabe: This is about Mueller and Trump's 'war on the FBI'

didn't know mueller had a war on the FBI

adam the (abanana), Saturday, 17 March 2018 04:35 (five years ago) link

two months pass...

Analysis: The 14 most ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ lines from Trump's 'Fox & Friends' interview

adam the (abanana), Thursday, 24 May 2018 19:09 (five years ago) link

https://media.giphy.com/media/QQZgTehcKrD2w/giphy.gif

omar little, Thursday, 24 May 2018 19:21 (five years ago) link

one month passes...
three weeks pass...

https://www.cnn.com/2018/08/10/opinions/look-out-trump-china-is-stealing-africa-opinion-intl/index.html

renormalizing colonialism ... or maybe i guess just straight up admitting it never went out of style?

the late great, Friday, 10 August 2018 21:49 (five years ago) link

ten months pass...
one year passes...

try a butt one

brimstead, Thursday, 9 July 2020 02:15 (three years ago) link

TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD

I hear that sometimes Satan wants to defund police (Neanderthal), Thursday, 9 July 2020 02:25 (three years ago) link

Client Marian Shelley, 33, recently had her first booty facial and called it “luxurious.”

shout-out to his family (DJP), Thursday, 9 July 2020 10:19 (three years ago) link

Got rid of the bootyflakez

I hear that sometimes Satan wants to defund police (Neanderthal), Thursday, 9 July 2020 10:38 (three years ago) link

four months pass...

i still can't get this out of my head

TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD

Lover of Nixon (or LON for short) (Neanderthal), Saturday, 14 November 2020 05:29 (three years ago) link

is the maintenance visit for this butt facial, a couple of weeks later, called a rebuttal?

StanM, Saturday, 14 November 2020 07:52 (three years ago) link

hey let’s all be cool and try a butt one

Li'l Brexit (Tracer Hand), Saturday, 14 November 2020 10:09 (three years ago) link

seven months pass...

Tentacles of Manhattan DA's Trump probe reach former bodyguard Calamari

Tracer Hand, Tuesday, 22 June 2021 21:37 (two years ago) link

hah

wasdnuos (abanana), Tuesday, 22 June 2021 23:24 (two years ago) link

one month passes...

This is the lead story on the entertainment page today:

https://www.cnn.com/2021/08/04/entertainment/lizzo-chris-evans-trnd/index.html

Clearly wtf, but also how great would it be if Lizzo and Chris Evans actually did have a baby together?

Karl Havoc (DJP), Wednesday, 4 August 2021 16:28 (two years ago) link

also I am still back on the booty facial

Karl Havoc (DJP), Wednesday, 4 August 2021 16:35 (two years ago) link

imagining Project Pat's voice chanting

TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD
TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD
TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD
TRY A BUTT ONE INSTEAD

making splashes at Dan Flashes (Neanderthal), Wednesday, 4 August 2021 17:39 (two years ago) link

that gets a well-earned groan

a gentle push against my Wonder Bread face (DJP), Wednesday, 11 August 2021 15:48 (two years ago) link

ten months pass...

https://i.imgur.com/LAmEzPN.jpg

Tracer Hand, Wednesday, 22 June 2022 22:40 (one year ago) link

hard go out there for a deaf kitty

maf you one two (maffew12), Wednesday, 22 June 2022 23:28 (one year ago) link

six months pass...

try a butt one

fentanyl young (Neanderthal), Thursday, 12 January 2023 07:06 (ten months ago) link

guys i’ve tried so hard to get a facial in lockdown but i just can’t

so i’m going to try a butt one instead

Tracer Hand, Thursday, 12 January 2023 09:18 (ten months ago) link

Is it… a buttial?

castanuts (DJP), Thursday, 12 January 2023 09:27 (ten months ago) link

three weeks pass...

big news on CNN.com

In the spotlight: Taylor Lautner makes rare comment about ex Taylor Swift that leaves his wife 'deceased'


CNN —

This is a true tale of Taylors, as actor Taylor Lautner’s wife, Taylor Dome, was all of us with her reaction to him spilling tea about that infamous Taylor Swift and Kanye West MTV VMAs moment.

In a video from their podcast “The Squeeze” posted Wednesday on Tik Tok, Dome asked Lautner, “If you could go back to one moment in your life, what moment would that be and what would you say to yourself?”

“Probably the 2009 VMAs, when I presented the award to Taylor and was unaware that the Kanye thing was not a skit,” he said, causing Dome to literally fall back in surprise and say, “I’m deceased.”

big if true

omar little, Friday, 3 February 2023 18:06 (ten months ago) link

a tale of tres taylors

POLIZISTEN VERSINKEN IM SCHLAMM (forksclovetofu), Friday, 3 February 2023 19:01 (ten months ago) link

should try a butt one that might bring her back to life

sanguisug boggy bogg (Neanderthal), Friday, 3 February 2023 22:37 (ten months ago) link

I am DELIGHTED that this thread was bumped for this non-story, I have been laughing at it since I saw it

castanuts (DJP), Friday, 3 February 2023 23:38 (ten months ago) link

you are all of us with your reaction to taylor dome's reaction to him spilling tea

omar little, Friday, 3 February 2023 23:52 (ten months ago) link

one taylor i never knew existed, one taylor i forgot existed, and another taylor over there saying "whaddya want from me?"

omar little, Friday, 3 February 2023 23:54 (ten months ago) link

Black to the bone, my home is your home
So welcome to the Taylordome

POLIZISTEN VERSINKEN IM SCHLAMM (forksclovetofu), Saturday, 4 February 2023 02:59 (ten months ago) link

the version i read said “causing his Dome to fall back” … got a snicker out of that

https://amp.cnn.com/cnn/2023/02/02/entertainment/taylor-lautner-taylor-swift/index.html

the late great, Saturday, 4 February 2023 03:22 (ten months ago) link

one month passes...

Video: Here's how US presidents would look with a mullet

got it in the blood, the kid's a pelican (Doctor Casino), Sunday, 19 March 2023 16:35 (eight months ago) link

one month passes...

this CNN article now includes a link to where you can find more information about the felonies the shooter was charged with, and the link is to the article you're already reading:

https://www.cnn.com/2023/04/17/us/kansas-city-teen-shot-wrong-house/index.html

Cthulhu Diamond Phillips (Neanderthal), Wednesday, 19 April 2023 16:22 (seven months ago) link

three weeks pass...

way to humanize seditious conspirators in a hate group

https://www.cnn.com/2023/05/09/politics/proud-boys-trial-notes/index.html

formerly abanana (dat), Wednesday, 10 May 2023 00:16 (seven months ago) link


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