your terrible ideas

"You can actually pinpoint the second when his heart rips in half"

hahaha -- right.. THERE.

http://i.imgur.com/8ZuR0GB.gif

http://i.imgur.com/SVCo0B6.gifv

http://i.imgur.com/SVCo0B6.gifv

oculus rift software that is just a skeleton following you around everywhere

a "gary algorithm"

documentary about the decline in popularity of the 80s 2-tone movement called 'The Last Days of Porkpie'

http://cdn.smosh.com/sites/default/files/2015/06/behind-the-gif-cheetos.gif

updated cover of "girl you need a change of mind" as sung by a fedora mra to a tumblr sjw

^a romantic comedy for these times

series of greeting cards which all have the same picture of Moses reading the ten commandments plus a speech bubble with a different one-word neologism, eg "Mansplaining!", "Clickbait!" and so forth

A terrible pop-country song based on dated slang called "You gotta quit that YOLO livin'"

Fan t-shirts commemorating different years from living history. So like, a t-shirt emblazoned with '1990' and a picture of Gazza and Pavarotti on it.

similarly, 2013, 2014, 2015 etc t-shirts using the London 2012 font

haha, yeah, just random shitty cultural ephemera from various years that have little to do with each other. just like 'hey i'm a big fan of 2006, check it out'

Or things that have continued happening or carried over into that year but that weren't from that year. Like a picture of the friends from Friends and a Windows 2000 box on a commemorative 2002 shirt.

http://i.imgur.com/RoDK88y.jpg

haha, yeah, just random shitty cultural ephemera from various years that have little to do with each other. just like 'hey i'm a big fan of 2006, check it out'

― yeast mode (dog latin), Monday, August 24, 2015 7:40 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

you could basically just mine high school yearbook supplements (like, those professionally-prepared color packages that would be sold to many high schools, "and here's Dolly the sheep!" etc.)

app that's like Shazam but for flora or fungi or w/e. so you could take a photo of eg a mushroom you found and the app would tell you if it was safe to eat

nb this is a terrible idea because it would be dangerous if it worked anything less than perfectly

still a good idea. and with GIS and stuff, we're possibly not far off.

This Probably Won't Kill You (That Cover Us Legally, We Believe, To The Best Of Our Knowledge): the app!

Woke up last night thinking it would be great and hilarious if every time I drove anywhere I wore a giant fish costume. NB I don't have a car.

get one then

fish costume first.

ford carpri

No need to get a car, you just need the fish costume for whenever it comes up

a site like vine, only the videos are just slightly longer

it's a disruptive idea

Like.... Instagram?

Like Vine for Instagrams

A site like Instagram that's just text descriptions of the users' photographs.

which reminds me of Ink Polaroids, which googled up this:

http://www.salon.com/1999/05/04/bowlie/

a 'bless you' robot

http://mattrichardson.com/Descriptive-Camera/

a site for screenshots of snapchats of people reacting to vines

embarking on a project where i shoot and edit fan-made-tribute videos for The Necks' entire discography

a Homegum Community wherein members make their own smallbatch gum at home even though there's a wide variety of acceptable ready-made options available for purchase at every grocery store and gas station. most homegum will accentuate the glycerin flavor of gum.

which will invite many terrible Bush puns on the DIY packaging to be sure

Mine will be called Minor League Chew

homegum movement to be rapidly outflanked by the more hardcore movement which consumes only old gum found on the undersides of school desks and movie theater armrests - freegumism

1. A facebook app kinda like that stupid Time Machine app people use but instead of old pictures of parties and fun it only shows the text "Banksy Exists"
2. A Las Vegas street performer that instead of wearing a cuddly animal costume wears a shirt that says "Hi, I am Banksy, and I am a relevant artist of your day"
3. A Pixar cartoon movie about a family of sweater knitting hedgehogs that receives tons of promotion but when shown in theaters is just a single frame that says "I am subversive Banksy"

Chuckle Brothers feature film where they are air traffic controllers

getting supermarkets to replace their automated checkouts with celebrity voices like Maggie Thatcher and Frank Bruno, a bit like how they sometimes do with satnavs.

as it happens my friend once had a hire car with an unnervingly Thatcher-esque satnav voice

I had another dream last night where I was watching a terrible movie.

It's an adaptation of the board game "Snakes & Ladders". The movie is just Harrison Ford running around inside a shopping mall shouting at people "Does anybody have a ladder? I need to go UP!". The villain is a yellow robot whose name is Mr. Racist.

I think you might be confusing 'terrible' with its antonym.

xp lol

this would easily be the best film harrison ford has been in since air force one, maybe even the fugitive