WE'RE EXPECTING !!!!!!

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You should try having an angry, gun-wielding, Dockers-wearing wingnut get you in a nice, tight, inescapable headlock sometime. Before you know it, the sense of security will overwhelm your synapses with the loveliest chemicals and you will not be able to remember how you lived before.

del griffith, Saturday, 29 December 2012 18:04 (thirteen years ago)

A paternity test might be your best shot for an answer.

http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8449/8017001277_c01cdaf73b_c.jpg

pplains, Saturday, 29 December 2012 18:04 (thirteen years ago)

Wasn't crazy about this one at first, until I imagined how nice a velour cushion would feel on one's own bare ass.

http://farm7.staticflickr.com/6225/6852366366_1622497941_c.jpg

pplains, Saturday, 29 December 2012 18:06 (thirteen years ago)

^^ 70s roman polanski film vibe w/ that one

the memoirs of gaydrian (clouds), Saturday, 29 December 2012 18:08 (thirteen years ago)

Do you think that photographer did some Photoshopping in the crotch area there? Something looks weird.

carl agatha, Saturday, 29 December 2012 18:14 (thirteen years ago)

she actually has no vagina.

packt like phoebe cates's dad in a chimney (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Saturday, 29 December 2012 18:56 (thirteen years ago)

I don't understand the need to take off your shirt and SHOW me you are pregnant. If you tell me that you're pregnant, I'll believe you. It's been done before. Just write it on your standard stationary. Give me visual evidence when you get the highest score in Donkey Kong.

toy_sleigher (Sufjan Grafton), Saturday, 29 December 2012 19:20 (thirteen years ago)

What strikes me about the gun pictures is how murderously aggressive the men look, while the women just look pregnant and content and not like an angry, gun-wielding, Dockers-wearing wingnut has them in a headlock.

― carl agatha, Saturday, December 29, 2012 12:57 PM (3 hours ago)

What (also) strikes me about them is the astonishment that there is more than one couple that wanted to be photographed in that pose

Lee626, Saturday, 29 December 2012 21:37 (thirteen years ago)

Is the left not a parody of the right?

toy_sleigher (Sufjan Grafton), Saturday, 29 December 2012 21:42 (thirteen years ago)

Apparently, since the pic on the right is on about 30 blogs but I can't find the other one elsewhere (tineye.com is so useful). But the woman in the parody doesn't look as happy/oblivious as the original

Lee626, Saturday, 29 December 2012 22:27 (thirteen years ago)

seven months pass...

http://i.imgur.com/crvqoWl.jpg

pplains, Friday, 16 August 2013 17:41 (twelve years ago)

!

I tweeted too much and I am in jail. (crüt), Friday, 16 August 2013 17:42 (twelve years ago)

aaaaahahahahaha

Z S, Friday, 16 August 2013 17:43 (twelve years ago)

lollll

tylerw, Friday, 16 August 2013 17:44 (twelve years ago)

OMG lololol

Lawyer... SUAVE... (carl agatha), Friday, 16 August 2013 18:12 (twelve years ago)

one year passes...

http://i.imgur.com/EPLkvQH.jpg

pplains, Tuesday, 6 January 2015 18:26 (eleven years ago)

oh my

gr8080, Tuesday, 6 January 2015 18:28 (eleven years ago)

Found a smaller size, did an image search for something bigger, ended up posing something with a watermark. So off my game.

pplains, Tuesday, 6 January 2015 18:46 (eleven years ago)

three weeks pass...

http://youarenotaphotographer.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/baby-punch.jpg

about a dozen duck supporters (carl agatha), Wednesday, 28 January 2015 13:38 (eleven years ago)

http://youarenotaphotographer.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/baby-arch.jpg

about a dozen duck supporters (carl agatha), Wednesday, 28 January 2015 13:41 (eleven years ago)

haha wat

pplains, Wednesday, 28 January 2015 14:55 (eleven years ago)

I'm sitting here with my jaw dropped, unable to look away.

mom tossed in kimchee (quincie), Wednesday, 28 January 2015 21:37 (eleven years ago)

O_o

difficult-difficult lemon-difficult (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 28 January 2015 21:45 (eleven years ago)

five months pass...

I know this isn't the right thread, but neither was the WE'RE EXPECTING thread either.

http://i.imgur.com/yp7IkCr.jpg

pplains, Tuesday, 21 July 2015 12:03 (ten years ago)

it kinda belongs on the irrational anger thread cuz it's driving me nuts that the dates go 2010-2005-2012 instead of chronologically left-to-right

i also want to graffiti 'klaatu barada nikto' underneath it

bizarro gazzara, Tuesday, 21 July 2015 12:06 (ten years ago)

x-post - I can tell you right now that I hate that couple. A lot. Also the chronology thing is annoying at first but it's sorta like a monogram with the wedding in the middle and each kid on a side. Better not have any oopsie third babies. Decorating nightmare.

Benson and the Jets (ENBB), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 12:36 (ten years ago)

It's a shame they all died though.

pplains, Tuesday, 21 July 2015 13:20 (ten years ago)

irl lol

mom tossed in kimchee (quincie), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 15:20 (ten years ago)

at pp's post, not the horrible horrible wall of awful

mom tossed in kimchee (quincie), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 15:21 (ten years ago)

how can they have gone to the trouble of building a monument to the time of their children's births without specifying AM or PM?

1992 ball boy (Karl Malone), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 15:34 (ten years ago)

ok i guess the wedding was presumably 2:30 pm but this doesn't excuse the left and right

1992 ball boy (Karl Malone), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 15:35 (ten years ago)

plus now i'm gonna have to celebrate the strangers' births four times each year: 8:23 am + 8:23 pm on Dec 11th, 7:30 am + 7:30 pm on Feb 13th
fuck!

1992 ball boy (Karl Malone), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 15:36 (ten years ago)

How could they have gone to the trouble without pausing to think about how awful and dated that's going to look in like two years? Maybe one at this point.

from batman to balloon dog (carl agatha), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 15:37 (ten years ago)

A+ thread

five six and (man alive), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 15:39 (ten years ago)

That St. Louis one makes me think the Arch is the father every time.

pplains, Tuesday, 21 July 2015 17:05 (ten years ago)

who the fuck would put a clock that low down on the wall?

feargal czukay (NickB), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 17:10 (ten years ago)

not the same thing exactly but a family i knew in high school had a stillborn about 10yrs prior; they had photo of the stillborn on a mantelpiece with a permanent light over it

the mom signed christmas birthday cards etc from the family + baby's name "in heaven"

they were the nicest ppl but it weirded me out sooooo much

difficult-difficult lemon-difficult (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 19:59 (ten years ago)

There's only one way that could've been any worse.

pplains, Tuesday, 21 July 2015 20:00 (ten years ago)

clock?

difficult-difficult lemon-difficult (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 20:02 (ten years ago)

mantlepiece

pplains, Tuesday, 21 July 2015 20:03 (ten years ago)

I want to do one of these where I'm dressed like a celeb magician a la david blaine, and it's styled as though the due date is the day I'm going to do my fantastic new trick

five six and (man alive), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 20:26 (ten years ago)

like "ON 11/7/2015, THE MYSTERY IS REVEALED..." and my hands are dramatically hovering over her belly

five six and (man alive), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 20:27 (ten years ago)

You just had your chance and you let it slip away... Guess you're going to have to have three kids.

from batman to balloon dog (carl agatha), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 20:31 (ten years ago)

four months pass...

http://i.imgur.com/Bnn7YPa.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/FvIYRIr.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/Okp3soI.jpg

pplains, Thursday, 3 December 2015 18:53 (ten years ago)

incredible

gr8080, Thursday, 3 December 2015 18:56 (ten years ago)

curious abt the process like did they ask the doctor to inform the custom exploding ball maker or what

lag∞n, Thursday, 3 December 2015 19:14 (ten years ago)

dude cmon the parents have a doctor/pa write it on a piece of paper and place it in a sealed envelope and then the parents give it to a trusted friend who makes the arrangements

gr8080, Thursday, 3 December 2015 19:38 (ten years ago)

wow i guess we all know how grady wld handle it now

lag∞n, Thursday, 3 December 2015 19:40 (ten years ago)

trusted friend should've had them fill the ball with ash, that would've made for great photos

Roberto Spiralli, Thursday, 3 December 2015 19:40 (ten years ago)

https://i.imgur.com/m94366y.jpg

pplains, Sunday, 11 October 2020 18:25 (five years ago)

one month passes...

I hate these can u imagine if gay people invited their family over for a party so they could wear shirts that said “the cum came from HERE and went THERE!” my family would never speak to me again pic.twitter.com/PRvKQc5AQr

— dylan (@dylaneatswings) November 23, 2020

superdeep borehole (harbl), Saturday, 28 November 2020 18:16 (five years ago)

How it started. How it’s going. pic.twitter.com/KZaFkFgGrU

— YS (@NYinLA2121) December 1, 2020

early-Woolf semantic prosody (Hadrian VIII), Tuesday, 1 December 2020 19:37 (five years ago)

two months pass...

https://www.cnn.com/2021/02/08/us/man-killed-cannon-baby-shower-trnd/index.html

Hello Nice FBI Lady (DJP), Monday, 8 February 2021 22:00 (five years ago)

the fact that it was an irl ~cannon~ filled with ~too mich gunpowder~

like

folks

what were they even trying to do here bc surely their intent was not to kill a friend jfc

terminators of endearment (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 9 February 2021 00:30 (five years ago)

The homeowner had purchased the cannon at an auction and had fired it several times before

imagine having this dolt for a neighbour.

Dusty Benelux (jim in vancouver), Tuesday, 9 February 2021 00:37 (five years ago)

Would it be untoward to say... that someone wasn't expecting?

eatandoph (Neue Jesse Schule), Tuesday, 9 February 2021 00:50 (five years ago)

not untoward at all.. very toward actually

Joses Chrust (map), Tuesday, 9 February 2021 02:06 (five years ago)

CNN supposedly such a trusted news source, and yet, not one word about the baby's gender.

pplains, Tuesday, 9 February 2021 02:19 (five years ago)

two months pass...

Someone blew up a gravel pit with tannerite for a goddamn GENDER REVEAL and now our tap water is brown.

— Maggie ‘The Sluttiest Little Farmer’ Jasmin (@Magsalicious) April 22, 2021

superdeep borehole (harbl), Thursday, 22 April 2021 23:17 (five years ago)

What, what I ask you, is wrong with the hets

Canon in Deez (silby), Friday, 23 April 2021 00:05 (five years ago)

what indeed

UPDATE: Kingston police say approx. 80 pounds of Tannerite were used at that gender reveal party that caused a massive explosion that shook homes for miles. Man who detonated it has turned himself in to police and is cooperating. Police haven’t decided on charges. @UnionLeader

— Jason Schreiber (@Schreibernews) April 22, 2021

superdeep borehole (harbl), Friday, 23 April 2021 02:42 (five years ago)

fun context--in its intended purpose tannerite is supposed to be used 1-2 lbs at a time.

call all destroyer, Friday, 23 April 2021 03:04 (five years ago)

also, new hampshire

call all destroyer, Friday, 23 April 2021 03:05 (five years ago)

would've been better if they'd made the water blue or pink depending on the sex of the child.

koogs, Friday, 23 April 2021 05:22 (five years ago)

and yet trans people are considered the danger to society

boxedjoy, Friday, 23 April 2021 08:06 (five years ago)

lol

My organization has hidden the gender of 5 babies around the city. We will reveal one every hour until our demands have been met

— ALEX “THE POSTING PHREAK” PTAK (@PtakJokes) April 23, 2021

rob, Friday, 23 April 2021 19:57 (five years ago)

lmao

terminators of endearment (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 23 April 2021 20:25 (five years ago)

four months pass...

maybe the worst ever

I'll never delete Facebook. pic.twitter.com/FXXqKkU34p

— Leo I guess (@Leodgrad) September 18, 2021

terminators of endearment (VegemiteGrrl), Sunday, 19 September 2021 18:34 (four years ago)

oh wow, uh, congratulations big guy

typo punishment 3: people shouldn't have to feel like they have ea (Karl Malone), Sunday, 19 September 2021 18:51 (four years ago)

i’m surprised she didnt include a gleeful selfie of her peeing on the stick as well

terminators of endearment (VegemiteGrrl), Sunday, 19 September 2021 19:18 (four years ago)

hahaha

kinder, Sunday, 19 September 2021 19:57 (four years ago)

idgi, is the premise that she might have frozen the pregnancy test in a popsicle and then documented it's melting and his reaction, if she were NOT pregnant?

Lavator Shemmelpennick, Monday, 20 September 2021 19:47 (four years ago)

oops its. please saddle me with cone of shame asap

Lavator Shemmelpennick, Monday, 20 September 2021 19:48 (four years ago)

has anyone saved the 9/11 version of this? dead link above.

https://i.imgur.com/0UwM0iJ.jpg

edited to reflect developments which occurred (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Monday, 20 September 2021 19:57 (four years ago)

three months pass...

obvs not really the right thread but

my most hated genre of family photos pic.twitter.com/ndJFmMDlum

— amy ⚢ (@chlorofem) December 19, 2021

rob, Monday, 20 December 2021 18:33 (four years ago)

🤮

Nedlene Grendel as Basenji Holmo (map), Monday, 20 December 2021 18:40 (four years ago)

two months pass...

The absolute CHAOS of this onesie my mom sent us for the baby… pic.twitter.com/wH7l9sASBI

— Evan D. Watkins (@VanWatz) March 11, 2022

rob, Saturday, 12 March 2022 15:04 (four years ago)

Baby mom needs to get checked out at a hospital asap

kinder, Saturday, 12 March 2022 18:41 (four years ago)

I want to see your heart like AN ANIMAL.

pplains, Saturday, 12 March 2022 19:30 (four years ago)

i had to read that shit like 5 times to even mildly comprehend it

looks like it was designed on horseback

terminators of endearment (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, 12 March 2022 19:41 (four years ago)

looks like it was designed on horseback

lol, I don't even know what this means, but it's a perfect description.

pplains, Saturday, 12 March 2022 20:11 (four years ago)

one year passes...

And in Iowa in October 2019, a gender reveal party went south when the family unintentionally built a pipe bomb. When the device went off the entire pipe exploded, sending shrapnel flying that hit and killed a grandmother standing nearby.

lmao/r.i.p.

i predict that the kids born from these tragedies will have powerful dark magic about them

sleepy bee (cat), Tuesday, 5 September 2023 19:10 (two years ago)

in the video of the plane crash, the camera follows the plane briefly after its wing detaches and then starts plunging to the ground, then pans back to the happy couple embracing under a cloudy streak of pink. i'll (hopefully) assume they didn't see it was crashing.

omar little, Tuesday, 5 September 2023 19:27 (two years ago)

First time I saw the video, I thought the pilot was doing a fancy trick.

pplains, Tuesday, 5 September 2023 19:27 (two years ago)

... by making his wing fold back on to the — Look, I didn't say I was paying that much attention to it.

pplains, Tuesday, 5 September 2023 19:28 (two years ago)

"if the left wing falls off, it's a girl..."

omar little, Tuesday, 5 September 2023 19:50 (two years ago)

I feel like I know it's a "her", but sometimes my wings bend back

cracked fixed view mire (Sufjan Grafton), Tuesday, 5 September 2023 21:08 (two years ago)

five months pass...

https://www.yahoo.com/news/couple-whose-gender-reveal-party-231646082.html

omar little, Monday, 12 February 2024 17:12 (two years ago)


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