your terrible ideas

A cover of 10cc's 'The Things We Do For Love', dubstep style with suitably amended lyrics and retitled 'The Things We Do For Wub'.

call it Grool with a backwards capital G and you're golden xp

Give the interior a school theme and call it Grool Skool?

And the adverts could be fronted by Mr. T.

"I pity the fool who doesn't eat at Grool Skool. Becuase it rools."

Also, another series of ads could be fronted by Dave Grohl, except the board of directors of the company that owned the Grool Skool chain would make him change his name to Dave Groooooohl.

i got tons of restaurants

salad daze - we only serve salads lol

snackball - a food game (maybe for kids?) which involves things like meatballs and grapes which can be thrown, through hoops or bounced off targets, into people's mouths

a mexican buffet called GORDOS

love the gruel idea

Children's Fables for the Web2.0 era: Google Docs and the Three Bears

Porn starring Merryl Streep entitled "Streep Throat"

Streep Throat! omg.

A website for people to find others with complimentary fetishes. For example, people into sploshing could be matched up with people who have a housework fetish.

a box set of TV shows that were canceled after one episode

i know they've had festivals/showings of cool/weird pilots that didn't get picked up

A Madonna tribute act called Whore Complex.

Bait shop called SQUID PRO QUO

hair salon called FUCK YOU, IT'S HAIR!

a reality show in which participants have to compete in losing weight, singing, cooking gourmet meals, dancing with celebrities, and designing fashionable outfits; meanwhile, their homes are being redecorated

it's called 'BRAVO'

An all-female Iron Maiden tribute act called Irony Maiden. Who all wear Margaret Thatcher masks.

that is a great idea

Thanks!
Therefore posting it on the 'terrible ideas' thread was a terrible idea...

you can't really go wrong on this thread

An 80's era Genesis tribute band from Holland called Invisible Dutch.

This Easter, let's all revert to Twitter Egg avatars and DM each other.

A sitcom about an Alan B'stard type character who works for a company based in 30 St Mary Axe, called 'Jerk In The Gherkin'.

"Poultry in Motion" - a conveyor belt type restaurant that serves all manner of cooked birds

get some rich person to pay me to spend 2 years completely alone, freaking out and making art

that's a good idea!

Commercialise the poopsock. The adverts could use a version of The B-52s' 'Love Shack' with new lyrics:

Poopsock
baby, poopsock

folks lining up outside just to poop down

poopin' in-a-sock
POOPING in a SOCK!

I have been singing this to myself all day, so I'm sure that it's a good idea.

While standing on a street corner in the commercial district.

I had an idea this morning for a 'raunchy stand-up comic for babies'

It's basically a guy who speaks with an Andrew Dice Clay cadence, and uses variations the catch phrase "cock-a-doodly-freakin-doo"

Like "So I had this rooster. Then I ate it. Cock-a-doodly-doo!"
"Then I had this pig. Now it's lunchmeat! Cock-a-doodly-doodly-freakin-doo!"

A cover of 'Bite It, You Scum' with the vocals processed through a Dalek voice effect.

vj ted talks for posi ppl

TED talks, full stop.

'Last Tango In Paris' - a short film following a desperate American tourist who is trying to find the last available can of fizzy orange soda in the city.

Do you mean "Last Faygo in Paris"?

That's the US title.

A Rifftr4x type product for pr0n movies.

Suture Self, a store which sells "repair kits" for the human body, allowing people to circumvent stupid doctors and hospitals.

Wake N Parm - a chain restaurant that sells Chicken/Eggplant/Meatball/Veal Parmigiana sandwiches only for breakfast

a strong packaging adhesive which dries to a hardened state, but when subjected to sustained sonic vibrations will undergo a phase change back into a pliable gel state.

this will result in interactive consumer product experiences like a pack of gum which cannot be opened unless you hold it up to your face and yell at it for like three or four minutes. target demo is mostly kids and anyone who doesn't hate fun.

This is secretly a good idea, but I'm writing it here so I have it on record:

A mafia-style sandwich shop called Baguette About It

Also an ambient act specialising in covers of the Northern Songs back catalogue called The Beatless.

Family Band: a photography business that specializes in family portraits posed in the style of band photos. Like mother, father and children staggered in the foreground and background, looking in different directions, in an abandoned warehouse.

You could even do portraits in the style of famous band photos/album covers, e.g. family zipping up flies after pissing on a giant concrete thingy.

^ such a not terrible idea. everybody should be quiet riot, the runaways or van halen though.