Damage ContrLOLz 2: LOL Harder

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that weird little typing song she launches into (before the sunglasses go on and the costume change) is disturbingly similar to my "counting game" that i constantly played in my head through my adolescence. thank god i finally god the counting game out of my head, it is a nightmare

Zach_TBD (Karl Malone), Monday, 22 February 2021 18:51 (five years ago)

lmao!! amazing find

Fetchboy, Monday, 22 February 2021 18:54 (five years ago)

7:00: Okay, T-Bone! Time for some serious crunching!

I'm using Windows
Windows, Windows 386
So all my app-li-cations are running at once
My report right now, is scattered all over my desk
W-w-w-windows will pull these files together real quick
I got pieces in one spreadsheet
I got pieces in another
I got pieces that have never been close to one another
Some are in the da-ta-base where things are pretty stuffy
Some are in the word pro-cess-or, that's where it gets fluffy(?)
W-w-windows, W-w-windows, Windows 386
Will pull these parts together and do it mighty quick
I'll cut and paste, cut-and-paste until it's in Pagemaker
Then I'll slick it up to be T-Bone's heartbreaker.

(Linda takes off her clothes)

"Here's the spreadsheet data you asked for Linda..."

WILLIAM!

"Linda! Uh-oh. These are 1-2-3 files. That doesn't look like 1-2-3."

8:13 - It's Na-Na-Not!
1-2-2-2-3! But don't wo-rry Will-iam, just hand the disk to me!
BARK BARK BARK
I got! Several applications looking mighty slick
Running un-der Win-dows 386!
BARK BARK BARK
In one of the win-dows I've got 1-2-2-2-3
Running at the same time as the others, can't you see?
BARK BARK BARK
I can cut and paste your files in-to my report
Or I can make them look bet-ter with Mi-cro-soft Chart
Charts is Charts is Charts is what I got
CYMBAL SPLASH
Now I'm gonna show you how to make the thing look hot!
BARK

"I'm in accounting! Nothing ever looks hot!"

SYNTH SOLO

Stand! Back William, stand b-b-b-back
Windows 386! IS ON THE ATTACK!

CYMBAL SPLASH, SYNTH SOLO CONTINUES WITH VAGUE MISSION IMPOSSIBLE INTERPOLATIONS AND VINYL SCRATCHING

"Wooooooow..."

That's not really my scene (I'm 41) (forksclovetofu), Monday, 22 February 2021 19:03 (five years ago)

forks, i'm really sorry but we're going to need you to use your 386 to update that draft. we LOVE the hyphens, but there aren't enough of them! Linda's song should have hyphens between each-and-ev-e-ry-syll-a-ble. Due-by-end-of-Day!

Zach_TBD (Karl Malone), Monday, 22 February 2021 19:32 (five years ago)

w-w-w-why

That's not really my scene (I'm 41) (forksclovetofu), Monday, 22 February 2021 19:43 (five years ago)

So many urges to say out loud "MOM! Like, OMG stop! Ughhh seriously oh my GAWD mom please"

Evan, Monday, 22 February 2021 20:01 (five years ago)

WATCH: Police in Karachi, Pakistan are training an armed rollerblading unit to better prevent theft and harassment on its streets. pic.twitter.com/IX5CrM6tep

— CBS News (@CBSNews) February 23, 2021

For a few seconds, the generic background music in this Reuters video sounds like it's going to resolve into a rendition of North American Scum. Just so you're not as disappointed as I was, let me tell you up front that it takes a different musical direction. But don't let that detract from your enjoyment of the rollerskating cops of Karachi.

peace, man, Wednesday, 24 February 2021 12:43 (five years ago)

Some serious Police Academy vibes in portions of that clip

Lavator Shemmelpennick, Wednesday, 24 February 2021 14:09 (five years ago)

a rollerblade jumping over a motorcycle forever

adam, Wednesday, 24 February 2021 14:51 (five years ago)

sorry but cops never equal lolz

lord of the ting tings (map), Wednesday, 24 February 2021 15:32 (five years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpKxtTPQ1Q8

map ca. 1890 (map), Monday, 8 March 2021 22:40 (five years ago)

pic.twitter.com/SqpRgdZf5E

— 𐑤𐑨 𐑐𐑩𐑤𐑐𐑦𐑵𐑩 (@la_polpino) March 16, 2021

map ca. 1890 (map), Tuesday, 16 March 2021 20:59 (five years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7zb5gKw6q3o

n/a (FlopsyDuck), Wednesday, 17 March 2021 18:28 (five years ago)

I see your blessed vacation and raise you a helicopter ride pic.twitter.com/KUOaFpEGLD

— avery💝s data📝charts📈& finance💹✊🌹 (@averygrrl) October 28, 2020

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Monday, 29 March 2021 14:30 (five years ago)

ha, that's awesome

Mr. Cacciatore (Moodles), Monday, 29 March 2021 15:55 (five years ago)

two weeks pass...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4NUJQxNj_jo

DJI, Friday, 16 April 2021 17:22 (five years ago)

They added a roundabout in rural eastern Kentucky pic.twitter.com/tkb19bTEuK

— Oregon Rolled A 20 (I Do Stick Figures) (@OregonRolledA20) April 25, 2021

i was too much listening to your accent (Spottie), Sunday, 25 April 2021 20:11 (five years ago)

aaaagh

terminators of endearment (VegemiteGrrl), Sunday, 25 April 2021 20:32 (five years ago)

https://twitter.com/i/events/1389710145249157122?s=20

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, 5 May 2021 05:53 (five years ago)

https://pbs.twimg.com/semantic_core_img/1389710415836319745/0H8K2G_M?format=jpg&name=small

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, 5 May 2021 05:53 (five years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kLI-X4HldmQ

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Friday, 7 May 2021 03:42 (five years ago)

two weeks pass...

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E2KhyGZXoAMEUsj?format=jpg&name=900x900

Linda and Jodie Rocco (map), Tuesday, 25 May 2021 17:34 (five years ago)

pic.twitter.com/nmU6VHGE0U

— Geoff Bisente (@GeoffBisente) June 3, 2021

Karl Malone, Friday, 4 June 2021 16:10 (five years ago)

love it

Lavator Shemmelpennick, Friday, 4 June 2021 16:40 (five years ago)

Brilliant

jmm, Friday, 4 June 2021 17:35 (five years ago)

I'm not going to even look, just guess.... does he remove each page, one-by-one, from the back instead of the front?

Because I saw the same gag with a construction worker last week.

pplains, Friday, 4 June 2021 17:36 (five years ago)

yr no fun pplains

that was great

terminators of endearment (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 4 June 2021 20:00 (five years ago)

I see that so much now though! The same bit getting repeated over and over again by different people. And no one seems to mind!

It's like a global version of this conversation.

https://i.imgur.com/vXlsoBA.jpg

pplains, Friday, 4 June 2021 20:03 (five years ago)

hee hee

terminators of endearment (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 10 June 2021 01:15 (four years ago)

three weeks pass...

who did this pic.twitter.com/NsAeH0HEJm

— Jason S. Canon (@uncanonical) October 26, 2018

burly crafty woodsman (James Harden) vs tall ethereal phantom (forksclovetofu), Friday, 2 July 2021 21:08 (four years ago)

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

oh ffs, forks.

pplains, Friday, 2 July 2021 21:48 (four years ago)

lmao i had to count

class project pat (m bison), Friday, 2 July 2021 22:09 (four years ago)

nice!

95 reeses nailed to a door but a mensch ate one

Z_TBD (Karl Malone), Friday, 2 July 2021 22:59 (four years ago)

ok 96 reeses, then a mensch ate one

Z_TBD (Karl Malone), Friday, 2 July 2021 23:03 (four years ago)

two months pass...

Respect to the true pioneers of the UK grime scene. pic.twitter.com/g3x4NAMvXw

— No Context Brits (@NoContextBrits) September 28, 2021

Linda and Jodie Rocco (map), Tuesday, 28 September 2021 21:08 (four years ago)

https://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/police-warn-public-not-approach-13230681

edited to reflect developments which occurred (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Tuesday, 28 September 2021 21:10 (four years ago)

two weeks pass...

equal parts lol and O_o

love is love is love ❤️ https://t.co/dpSqMOAWgU

— giabuchi (@jaboukie) October 17, 2021

terminators of endearment (VegemiteGrrl), Sunday, 17 October 2021 19:07 (four years ago)

one month passes...

pic.twitter.com/cbT6lc8E4x

— Bad Vaccine Takes (@BadVaccineTakes) November 21, 2021

silverfish, Monday, 22 November 2021 00:42 (four years ago)

"It's def possible !"

silverfish, Monday, 22 November 2021 00:43 (four years ago)

Now that's a Hot (Burrito) Take.

pplains, Monday, 22 November 2021 14:33 (four years ago)

two weeks pass...

How The Grinch Stole Someone’s BBL Appointment pic.twitter.com/0I5ieqHVUQ

— Richard Nevels 🏁 (@Richie_l0c0) December 6, 2021

Nedlene Grendel as Basenji Holmo (map), Monday, 6 December 2021 21:10 (four years ago)

pic.twitter.com/GnZ0491RuE

— Will (@iamwillb_) December 6, 2021

Nedlene Grendel as Basenji Holmo (map), Monday, 6 December 2021 21:38 (four years ago)

three weeks pass...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3JPGxefdbHc

goole, Wednesday, 29 December 2021 06:31 (four years ago)

two months pass...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSAp9sBzPbc

Nedlene Grendel as Basenji Holmo (map), Monday, 28 February 2022 22:43 (four years ago)

u have to LOVE to WORK pic.twitter.com/fv5bb5fJpQ

— Vinny Thomas (@vinn_ayy) March 9, 2022

Nedlene Grendel as Basenji Holmo (map), Thursday, 10 March 2022 00:07 (four years ago)

five months pass...

i'm literally the only one who posts anything to this graveyard of a thread anymore but i gotta put it somewhere

In 1663, the partial fossilised skeleton of a woolly rhinoceros was discovered in Germany. This is the “Magdeburg Unicorn”, one of the worst fossil reconstructions in human history. pic.twitter.com/rmV1vcB3LY

— Brian Roemmele (@BrianRoemmele) August 14, 2022

(grim) pump track (wales) (map), Monday, 15 August 2022 02:35 (three years ago)

Lmao! That looks like a far side cartoon.

Chyiv Kyiv (Fetchboy), Monday, 15 August 2022 05:45 (three years ago)

it totally does lmao

terminators of endearment (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, 15 August 2022 05:52 (three years ago)

10/10 unicorns proven
also that Rick Astley pitch-bend makes it sound like Front 242 which is a very good thing

assert (matttkkkk), Monday, 15 August 2022 07:08 (three years ago)


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