Misdirected emails

coffee cup pic kraken me up

Haha.

"Man, it weirds me out when people look at porn in Starbucks."

http://i.imgur.com/gYMqY3n.jpg

Do they let anyone use this app? LOL I'm having visions of ordinary folk using it and going "yeah I got this" and doing gallstone removals on their dog or something.

"you must be this doctor-ish to buy this app"

it's amazing how much surgical stuff is out there, a lot of it semi-instructional. hopefully some doctor in a remote part of the world who's never done a particular procedure is finding this useful.

me, on the other hand, I'm the idiot who looked at footage of the surgeries I've had (well, being done on others) on youtube and about puked

Huh. I've never thought to do that.

Dear All

I am delighted to be able to update you with the news that the appeal now stands at £2,511,673.76. We are now officially over half way, and this is thanks to you and your parishioners and all supporters of the appeal.

There are now 13 parishes who have exceeded their suggested contributions
13 parishes who have raised between 75 & 99%
19 who have raised between 50 & 74%
31 who have raised between 25 & 49%
30 who have raised up to 25%

With 4 weeks before Advent starts, there is still time to do a final push before we start again in 2016. We have been very busy here at the office preparing packs, letters and promotional material for quite a few parishes who are holding pulpit presentations, or who have invited one of the appeal group to visit, to speak and encourage more parishioners to support the appeal. Monsignor Dazeley has been keeping himself busy in his retirement visiting parishes and speaking at masses, it just goes to show that even in retirement our priests are still supporting others.

We are now booking dates in February and March for Father Brian, John Curran and other members of the group to visit parishes, if you would like someone to speak at your parish, then please let us know. Father Brian recently visited a parish, and as a result of his appeal we received £4500 in donations.

If you do feel that you need some extra support or are a parish without a representative, then please let me know. We are here to support you and know that the processes we are using in the appeal do work, we can adapt to fit with parish requirements so please contact us if you have any queries or concerns. I appreciate that areas of our Diocese have been affected by job losses and unemployment and we are sorry for those who have been affected.

Don’t forget we have gift aid collection envelopes, home collecting boxes, collecting tins, percentage thermometer charts, posters, stickers and fundraising packs should you need them. Donations can also be made via the BT MyDonate website ( see the link at the bottom of the email). Mother of God parish in Leicester are holding a Christmas concert in aid of the appeal on the 6th December, and I know there are other parishes who will be holding their Christmas Fairs in aid of the appeal. If you need any posters, flyers or tickets, or help with any events, again, please contact us.

Gift Aid is vital to our fundraising efforts so please encourage parishioners to Gift Aid their donations if they can. We have received over 4390 donations and of those 1838 didn’t complete a Gift Aid declaration. This means we have missed out on over £240,685.00 of ‘free money’ so please keep reminding donors!

Thank you for you for your continued support, and please contact us if you require any assistance

With kind regards

having trouble getting removed from this FarmersOnly dating site that someone used my email for.

From: Word-Username, Jerry (Partner at CA real estate firm):
To: (wife and his son, Thom Word-Username)
FYI

Sent from my iPhone

Begin forwarded message:

From: "Put-upon Associate" <same firm>
Date: October 27, 2015 at 8:44:12 AM PDT
To: Partner
Subject: FW: Jerry's Son

Jerry,

Last week, Klient sent me this email with some thoughts for Thom to consider about alternative ways of getting his foot in the door at Pandora. I hope this is helpful.

Associate

From: Klient [gmail.com]
Sent: Wednesday, October 21, 2015 1:19 PM
To: Associate>
Subject: Jerry's Son

Hi Associate,

I was thinking about Jerry's son on my way to lunch, and even if the internship or the few music analyst positions don't work out, he should look into other departments. We have a slew of people who are musicians on the side, and Pandora is just their "day job" and they like being associated with a music company.

Listener support, music makers group, etc. He should look into other departments that still touch music topics, but aren't necessarily "music" roles. And the company really fosters transfers, so he could always get in that way and then transfer to an analyst role.

Best,
Klient

dammit JERRY

Dear mh,

Hope this email finds you well.

Thank you for showing interest in our research report “Industrial Greases Market: Global Industry Analysis and Forecast to 2015 to 2021”

Please find attached the Table of Content (ToC) of the report for your perusal.

This study will help you generate, evaluate and implement strategic decisions as it provides the necessary information on technology-strategy mapping and emerging trends in the Industrial Greases Market. This is the most comprehensive and strategically analyzed research in the market providing the most granular data.

Kindly let me know if you have any queries and I would be glad to assist the same.

Looking forward to your response.

Thanks & Regards,

Industrial Greases must be a band, somewhere

dinner right here

join the great illuminati today
Nov 5 (1 day ago)
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the illuminati

Hello Charlie:

It was a pleasure for Kathi and me to reacquaint with you at he 50th reunion.

The 50 years have certainly passed quickly.

Congratulations on your very successful banking career.

Take care and best wishes,

Walt

Dear yun,

Thank you for downloading the McDonald's® Mobile App.

Click here to activate!

By activating your email address, you will be able to access offers and manage your account.

Enjoy,

McDonald's

someone that used my email for pandora loooves plies

Hi Johnny
I justed wanted to see how you were doing today.
Any increase in pain? Did we do too much?

Avi

Kind Regards
Avinesh Pursad
Lander & Pursad Biokineticists
Sports Science Institute of South Africa
Boundary Road
Newlands

I failed to win an assault rifle case, but I wanna thank my dumb-ass Texan lawyer Namensvetter for entering me.

Doesn't look very homely my love, but in a different life this could have been our hipster HQ.

Am in the caff having a medicinal fry up and hoping it makes me feel human.

Got Tessa arriving shortly to install into two tiny glass cases.

Good luck my love. Hope they agreed to 2.30

Xxxxx

this is not misdirected, but rather highly directed (to me and all the other o.g. gmail addresses with my name):

Looking to plan a war against all other names, I am your leader, junta, we are the council of Jordan's

i of course responded that i have been waiting for this day, but questioned the sender's Jordan-ness. the response:

I HAVE A DREAM, I believe our names may live in equality. May we have a long and prosperous relationship. I believe you should be the leader, the chosen 1

Good morning dear ones, Did you notice the lovely china at the farm? White with a delicate blue pattern? The china belonged to Schatzi's-Ryan's grandma. It occurred to me that it would be awesome for you 2 to have! What could be better-Schatzi's china on Mimi's table.I think Leah has a few pieces in Atlanta. I will ask her to save them to go with your china if you decide that you want it, and we will bring next week.
Do you have a kennel big enough for Lulu? We are thinking of bringing her?
xoxoxo

Hello JordanD1,
Thank you for registering at Weedmaps.com, the best way to find your bud online.

Jordan,

Thank you for signing your liability waiver, we will review it for correctness when you arrive. For your records, here is a copy of the waiver you agreed to. To save time during the check in process, you can bring a printed copy with you.

House Of Boom
Extreme Air Sports
100 Urton Ln
Louisville, KY 40223

Merry Christmas Amanda! Enjoy this wonderful gift of National Geographic Magazine. Now you have more material for lighters;) Love, Ryan

Sender: Robert Y...
To: Clay S...

Subject: [no subject]

Go.

Microuf new 10 computer

One of the boys gave me this one and I’m having a hard time learning how to operate it , as I understand many other people have . I’d like to have the old one back .

HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS !!!!

Ticket Purchase Details
Confirmation Number: 0720038823
Movie Title: Star Wars: The Force Awakens
Movie Date: 12/26/2015
Movie Time: 3:30 PM
Ticket Quantity: 2
Ticket Type: 2 Adult
Theatre Name: AMC Livonia 20
Theatre Address: 19500 Haggerty Road
LIVONIA, MI 48152
Theatre Phone Number: (734) 542-3191
Ticket Amount: 2 Adult Tickets $17.58
Ticket Total: $17.58
Total Convenience Fee: $2.50

$17.58 inc tax and fees for two tickets? i'm moving to livonia mi

Reminder: Your ecard from Warren/Hilda is waiting for you at AmericanGreetings.com

- logistics planning for the muse concert in toronto jan 16
- a draft of a letter that a couple wrote with the help of their therapist to another couple

^now you're just teasing with that last one

i would feel bad posting it, but it's so vague it's not actually that interesting. i think from a husband and wife to the husband's brother and his wife.

"We're sorry we ordered the extra sour cream from Uncle Julio's. We had no idea Susan was intolerant of lactose."

Hey, DAMNIT!

Thanks for registering and becoming a PlayersPlus member.

..a woman in Oregon has spent the last few years believing my email address is hers. Stop it, damnit!

oh god I just remembered that a client of one of my former companies sent in a note to my firm, on the back of which was a letter to presumably her ex about their relationship.

juicy

Another one. No text but the subject:

Hi neighbors. Here we are at sea tac waiting for flight to la. All is good. Sunny & gorgeous here. Heard from my sister , looks like she won't be coming to basin tonight. Maybe later. Will you close my Gate at some point?  Love to you both!

I think the airport has an employee who closes the gate after a flight departs.

"You are old, Father William," the young man said,
"And your hair has become very white;
And yet you incessantly stand on your head--
Do you think, at your age, it is right?"

"In my youth," Father William replied to his son,
"I feared it might injure the brain;
But now that I'm perfectly sure I have none,
Why, I do it again and again."

"You are old," said the youth, "as I mentioned before,
And have grown most uncommonly fat;
Yet you turned a back-somersault in at the door--
Pray, what is the reason of that?"

"In my youth," said the sage, as he shook his gray locks,
"I kept all my limbs very supple
By the use of this ointment--one shilling the box--
Allow me to sell you a couple."

"You are old," said the youth, "and your jaws are too weak
For anything tougher than suet;
Yet you finished the goose, with the bones and the beak:
Pray, how did you manage to do it?"

"In my youth," said his father, "I took to the law,
And argued each case with my wife;
And the muscular strength which it gave to my jaw
Has lasted the rest of my life."

"You are old," said the youth; "one would hardly suppose
That your eye was as steady as ever;
Yet you balanced an eel on the end of your nose--
What made you so awfully clever?"

"I have answered three questions, and that is enough,"
Said his father, "don't give yourself airs!
Do you think I can listen all day to such stuff?
Be off, or I'll kick you down-stairs!"

-- Lewis Carroll

Hello Alumni!

I'd first like to wish you all a Happy New Year! I hope 2016 brings you all the happiness and prosperity you deserve.

We will be hosting an open house/support meeting that is specific to **** only clients and be ecstatic if you would be able to joint us:

Event details:

Address: Men Being Honest Group, *** ******** ***. This is misleading - so we meet AT THE ENTRANCE AROUND THE RIGHT SIDE OF THE BUILDING, on ********* St. under the bridge. We all go in together as it is a secure building, so please try to be on time. Look for a bunch of misfits milling about the side entrance. If you get confused, call Curtis at (***) ***-****

--there will be light snacks and beverages provided.

Fw: Watch Lecture One for "Winston Churchill and Statesmanship"

Dear mh:
I hope you will watch this series on “Winston Churchill” and possibly take a few minutes to make some notes and to begin writing your thoughts down. Because within your genes rest your great grandfather and your father who believe strongly in the Ten Commands as well as the Bill of Rights and the Constitution.
Love you
Dad

Sent from Windows Mail

Fw: 123_1.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/Kar0YkR.jpg

I just got a forwarded message from my non-dad about a second part of this Churchill series

I should watch it, I am really intrigued to see how Winston Churchill is related to the ten commandments, bill of rights, and constitution

Tre,

-- how many have criminal conviction
-- need their contact info to get info on the conviction (email and phone number)
**Students with FELONY or misdemeanor charges of Domestic Violence, Physical Assault, unlawful use of a firearm, etc., will not be accepted for training. No Exceptions.**
-- how many members
-- need their full name, DOB, contact information
--do you want just white card for team members or blue cards for those who qualify to carry a weapon?
-- Company is responsible for security guards required training.
--Will have to be trained by a Board-approved instructor
--Will you be covering the cost for me to take exam if I have to take it

Dear Lord, Don.

http://i.imgur.com/rP7a6LK.jpg

lol @ "Al, Al, Al, Bill, Bill, Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob, Bruce, Bruce, Christene, Chuck, Chuck, Dale, Dan, Dan, ..."

Al
Al
Al
Bill
Bill
Bob
Bob
Bob
Bob
Bob
Bruce
Bruce
Christene
Chuck
Chuck
Dale
Dan
Dan
Dennis
Denny
Don
Ed
Gary
Gary
Gene
Gene
Jack
Jaime
Jay
Jeff
Jeremy
Jerry
Jim
Jim
Jim
Jim
Jim
Joe
Joe
Joe
Joe
Joe
John
John
Kevin
Kevin
Len
Mark
Michael
Miguel
Mike
Mike
Nick
Nick
Pat
Pat
Pat
Pat
Patrick
Patrick
Pete
Pete
Roger
Ryan
Ryan
Sal
Steve
Steve
Steve
Steve
Thomas
Tim
Tim
Tim
Tim
Timothy
Tom
Tom
Tom
Tom
Tom
Tom
Tom
Ty
Val & Laura
Wally

poll

Lyrics