dirt bag style

when i go to the movies i pull half-eaten buckets of popcorn out of the trash and eat them instead of buying new corn

went so long without showering in college that the exchange student that was working at the dining hall asked me if it was raining outside. it wasn't.

i lived in the copycat in baltimore btw

― slam dunk, Monday, December 3, 2012

this explains so so much.

You know what? I visited the Copycat a couple times, tagging along with a friend of mine. All I remember about it was skateboards, basketballs, and a really awful punk band rehearsing.

i lived in the copycat in baltimore btw

― slam dunk, Monday, December 3, 2012

this explains so so much.

― bob chipeska (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Thursday, December 6, 2012 3:54 PM (21 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

woke up to mice turds on my pillow like a visit from bizarro tooth fairy

Cleaned out my car last night in a mall parking garage while I was waiting to picuk someone up from work. I didn't want to put my trash in any of the plastic bags I had in there, since thy come in handy as trashcsn liners around the home, you know? So I just started marching handfuls of car detritus over to the trashcans near the entrance. At some point, a young couple posted up.at the trashcan I'd been dumping all this stuff in, and I caught myself mumbling under my breath about "stealing my trashcan. The robitussin I'd taken earlier in the evening no doubt played a role in all this.

Anyway, carrying armload after armload of car trash, including the contents of a bag of Bugles I had spilled all over the passenger side on New Years' Eve, struck me as pretty dirtbag. I was self-conscious about it, but I had to do this fuckin thing, you know? It had been one of the new years resolutions to get the interior clean,and so I madeprogress on that. But I was so stoked when I found this can on Pepsi Max that I dsnt even know I had.

So I said "I'll drink that on the way to work in the morning. I can save the money I'd have spent on coffee." I'm on the bus now and get to drinking it., but its a little off. Best Taste date on the bottom of the can? February 2012. How long have I been rolling with that Pepsi Max anyway?

car stuff just accumulates, man. not at all dbs but I have a book in the back of mine that I got at the used bookstore, didn't take out, and keep thinking "yeah, if I'm stuck somewhere without a book, I'll read that one, better just keep it in the car for now"

it's probably been in there at least six months by now

I found a completely mummified banana in the back seat of my friend's car a few weeks ago - I was pretty impressed. Looked centuries old (and completely intact in its shrivelled state, no leakage or weird smell)!

I had a half-eaten burrito in the back for over a month, luckily it was cold outside or my car would completely smell like death by now

Oh, cars don't count in terms of places that have to be neat, right? Cause otherwise I'm in trouble.

Oh yeah, one of the things I found was a rock hard quesadilla that I must have made my son for a quick breakfast on the road at some unknown date. There was one tiny bite taken out of it.

I was... actually aghast when I got a ride from this woman I was chilling with once. The entire back seat was full, not the floor, but the seats as well, and the passenger side in the front had about five layers of fast food wrappers. If you aren't up to that level yet, I would rank it not dbs

OK, what? No, gross. Not that level.

wearing a bikini top under your clothes bc you have no clean bras

If you aren't up to that level yet, I would rank it not dbs

― mh, Tuesday, February 5, 2013 11:14 AM (8 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

mh introducing the metric for dirtbag style

roxy that is <10 dbs

I rode in the car of that same person w/the vehicle I could barely fit in due to to junk later, only to find she had taken up smoking again and had an empty starbucks cold drink cup full of cigarette butts. On her patio at home, she had a bike with a basket on the front she hadn't moved for a while. The basket was full of cigarette butts.

i would say if you are up to that level you are beyond dbs and possibly a hoarder

what was weird was that most of her place was completely clean, with that exception, but she had completely run out of all paper products, including toilet paper

drew barrymore is mh in riding in cars with hoarders

i crashed at someone's place once and before going to sleep i draped the white dress shirt i was wearing over a floor fan. (probably because the floor was so filthy i instinctualy thought that was the best place to let it rest for the night)

when i went to put it on the next morning, it was coated in a zebra-stripe pattern of thick, black dust.

i visited her again a year later (at a totally different apartment she'd since moved to) and quickly realized she had a habit of buying paper plates and cups so as to avoid washing her sink full of dirty dishes.

eat fast food or microwaveable foods, imo

http://imgur.com/gallery/8yCp3

this thread title gets stuck in my head everytime i look around my apartment and realize i need to clean/organize
i am not a dirtbag btw

knew I should have taken that key to my house back from my sister

those little paper packets on the floor are for a saline neti pot kit

the bed is so gross!

change sitting out on the bathroom counter is a pet peeve of mine, idk why

I haven't brushed my teeth yet this century. I use trident gum and "floss" by swishing water or whiskey or whatever i'm drinking around my mouth and between my teeth.

i crashed at two friends apartment once like 7 years ago and when i took a shower in the morning i noticed all these pennies and nickles and dimes on the floor of the shower

i asked one of them why that was and he said that the other dude "falls asleep on the couch with his shirt off and all the spare change that falls out of his pockets sticks to his body and doesn't come off until he gets in the shower"

that is more lol than anything

pretty dirtbag to just let it collect in the shower for months though

i'm imagining a green crust of copper forming at the shower floor

bingo.

i asked one of them why that was and he said that the other dude "falls asleep on the couch with his shirt off and all the spare change that falls out of his pockets sticks to his body and doesn't come off until he gets in the shower"

lol iirc there's actually an episode of this american life dealing w/ this phenomenon

i hate loose coins scattered around that i tend to throw them out, except for quarters and the occassional dime. pennies just go in the trash all the time, i fucking hate pennies

oh lord

Let me...is anyone eating? You might want to put that down and swallow really well.

I just pulled the insoles out of my work sneakers and I don't wear socks, okay? I put the insoles in a bowl with hot water and ammonia and the ground-in skin just FLOATED OFF in rafts. It was amazing. I don't have time to wash the shoes themselves because I need them tomorrow, but I WILL SOON, because SATISFACTION!

not wearing socks with work sneakers is some dirtbag olympics-level training. kudos.

I don't like wearing socks. Too many layers, they just bunch up, and they look stupid.

http://i.imgur.com/jBQJ2AG.png

nope

this is "dirt bag style" not "mentally ill style"

no rules, just right

what was in the tubs
& why two varieties

Would eat

old but relevant

http://i.imgur.com/rA9eKfL.jpg

cut it out

lolol

haha both of those sights are so disgraceful, i have a nostalgic soft spot for rough as guts dirtbags.

those two pics are like vice magazine interns trying to one-up each other on instagram