Damage ContrLOLz

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

Not all messages are displayed: show all messages (5907 of them)

also this:

August 25, 1987
Dear Mark,
Guru Lahera has just informed of the sad news that the monastery near Trincomalee, Sri Lanka has been attacked by communist gorillas and guru Patel has probably been killed.* Guru Lahera has gone back to Sri Lanka to attend to matters and meditate. So temporarily I’m going to have to put off the exercising of my house spirits, although I know you probably want to get this over with almost as much as I do.
Temporarily I’m going to try to lure the bad spirits from the house by putting a spirit house in the garden. The spirit house costs $200 plus the cost of the food and the gifts to be placed inside. I’ll understand if you don’t want to pay for this expense in addition to the exercism sometime later.
Yours,
Ellen
*You shouldn’t blame yourself too much for this.

― dense macabre (DJP), Tuesday, 8 November 2011 20:44 (fourteen years ago)

this is destined for a book deal

― goole, Tuesday, 8 November 2011 20:45 (fourteen years ago)

In my mind Ellen sort of looks like a hippie-fied version of Elayne Boosler in lost of flowy Chicos sort of clothing. Her guru shit was killing me.

― Juggy Brottleteen (ENBB), Tuesday, 8 November 2011 20:47 (fourteen years ago)

psyched for the ray and eddie crossover.

― pplains, Tuesday, 8 November 2011 20:47 (fourteen years ago)

Ellen's first letter is next-level hilarious

― dense macabre (DJP), Tuesday, 8 November 2011 20:49 (fourteen years ago)

"That means you owe me a refund of $9200.00 according to my boyfriend."

karen's boyfriend's math is the most amazing math

― elmo argonaut, Tuesday, 8 November 2011 20:56 (fourteen years ago)

hmmmmmm

http://thetenants.blogspot.com/

― am0n, Tuesday, 8 November 2011 21:00 (fourteen years ago)

this is making me lol:

Dear Mark:

I keep the windows closed because the people who use the car wash on the corner play their car radios very loudly and it is to nosey in here with the windows open when people who use the car wash play their car radios very loudly when they wash their cars.

Yours,
Karen

― am0n, Tuesday, 8 November 2011 21:04 (fourteen years ago)

ha amon, if this was an old xerox meme of yesteryear i'm not surprised someone else found the letters internet-worthy as well

― elmo argonaut, Tuesday, 8 November 2011 21:08 (fourteen years ago)

well this is brilliant

― herbie mann on some gully shit (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 8 November 2011 21:31 (fourteen years ago)

http://www.rawstory.com/rs/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/bananaman-screen.jpg
http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2011/11/08/reporter-dresses-as-grapes-to-defend-boy-suspended-for-banana-suit/

― fill up ass of emoticon fart (crüt), Tuesday, 8 November 2011 21:33 (fourteen years ago)

omg the latest karen & ellen update is glorious: http://karenandellen.tumblr.com/post/12524879817/i-think-this-is-serious

― elmo argonaut, Tuesday, 8 November 2011 21:34 (fourteen years ago)

what the hell

― dense macabre (DJP), Tuesday, 8 November 2011 21:35 (fourteen years ago)

why is she writing her landlord about "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?"

― dense macabre (DJP), Tuesday, 8 November 2011 21:38 (fourteen years ago)

because she is completely stoned out of her gourd?

― i think this is serious (elmo argonaut), Tuesday, 8 November 2011 21:40 (fourteen years ago)

she makes some important points

― herbie mann on some gully shit (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 8 November 2011 21:42 (fourteen years ago)

The school’s principal was ultimately forced to resign, and Thompson has since returned to his studies.

happy ending!

― goole, Tuesday, 8 November 2011 21:51 (fourteen years ago)

it's very a-peeling

― herbie mann on some gully shit (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 8 November 2011 21:55 (fourteen years ago)

feel like he's gonna be guesting on an OFWGKTA video

― herbie mann on some gully shit (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 8 November 2011 21:57 (fourteen years ago)

I think those tenants are definitely fucking with the landlord

― ASPIE Rocky (dayo), Tuesday, 8 November 2011 22:40 (fourteen years ago)

ok i havent yet got to the letters but can i say i watched the bike crash like 5 times and the rider getting bitchy when they end makes me lose it every time.

― GOIT BUZZ TOYS (a hoy hoy), Wednesday, 9 November 2011 00:47 (fourteen years ago)

http://i114.photobucket.com/albums/n276/lyrical_savage/homerrunningincircles.gif

― dogs in hot cardies (electricsound), Wednesday, 9 November 2011 00:58 (fourteen years ago)

^^^ what I was thinking too

― ASPIE Rocky (dayo), Wednesday, 9 November 2011 01:02 (fourteen years ago)

sorry i am behind w/this but

April 11, 1988

Dear Mark:

Yours,
Karen

― Abattoir Educator / Slaughterman (schlump), Wednesday, 9 November 2011 01:32 (fourteen years ago)

Legendary Music Producer Jimmy Iovine explains how he and Dr. Dre conceived Beats headphones:
http://youtu.be/tHOqMN8GD7s?t=1m34s

― pass the duchy pon the left hand side (musical duke) (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 9 November 2011 13:21 (fourteen years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tHOqMN8GD7s&t=1m34s

― pass the duchy pon the left hand side (musical duke) (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 9 November 2011 13:21 (fourteen years ago)

(at 1:34)

― pass the duchy pon the left hand side (musical duke) (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 9 November 2011 13:22 (fourteen years ago)

Hardware

That is pretty amusing right there

― herbie mann on some gully shit (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 9 November 2011 13:33 (fourteen years ago)

fuck sneakers

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Wednesday, 9 November 2011 15:42 (fourteen years ago)

lonely dre just walking along the beach thinking baout sneakers

― Abattoir Educator / Slaughterman (schlump), Wednesday, 9 November 2011 15:55 (fourteen years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KgUIbPfhSuo

― markers, Wednesday, 9 November 2011 18:27 (fourteen years ago)

The first time I ever went to a Target, I was wearing khaki shorts and a red shirt, not knowing that khaki and red were their uniform colors. I was a little embarrassed, but kinda excited because I got an idea to get a whole bunch of people to go into Target dressed in khaki and red. I got home and told my roommate about my cool plan and she said "Why the fuck would you want to do that?"

― rustic italian flatbread, Wednesday, 9 November 2011 18:32 (fourteen years ago)

lol

― markers, Wednesday, 9 November 2011 19:35 (fourteen years ago)

whats the point of doing that if you're just going to let best buy kick you out

― am0n, Wednesday, 9 November 2011 20:01 (fourteen years ago)

occupy best buy

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Wednesday, 9 November 2011 20:05 (fourteen years ago)

this is what shopping looks like

― am0n, Wednesday, 9 November 2011 20:06 (fourteen years ago)

this is destined for a book deal

― goole, Tuesday, November 8, 2011 2:45 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

From the FB page:

Still looking for that perfect Christmas gift? The Karen & Ellen letters go hardback the first week of December. And look for other merchandise to be available later next week.

― Bon Ivoj (jaymc), Wednesday, 9 November 2011 21:20 (fourteen years ago)

lol viral

― ASPIE Rocky (dayo), Wednesday, 9 November 2011 22:10 (fourteen years ago)

missing yr quotation marks there

― herbie mann on some gully shit (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 9 November 2011 23:24 (fourteen years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usNhDwc7azg

"like in the matrixisisiss"

― am0n, Thursday, 10 November 2011 05:46 (fourteen years ago)

wow, tyson's rad in that
CAIN CAIN CAIN CAIN CAIN CAIN CAIN CAIN

― herbie mann on some gully shit (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 10 November 2011 06:06 (fourteen years ago)

please insert a jellybean into my usb port

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Thursday, 10 November 2011 16:38 (fourteen years ago)

mucho lols at tysoncain

http://urbanoutfittersredesign.tumblr.com/

― del griffith, Friday, 11 November 2011 02:24 (fourteen years ago)

The weird thing is that he manages to sound nothing like Cain but totally nail his movement.

― pass the duchy pon the left hand side (musical duke) (Hurting 2), Friday, 11 November 2011 02:29 (fourteen years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ykVe51qar0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ykVe51qar0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ykVe51qar0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ykVe51qar0

― Don't attack when he is black. (forksclovetofu), Friday, 11 November 2011 14:42 (fourteen years ago)

recommended off that

http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&v=u2vZUsL6OOA

― goole, Friday, 11 November 2011 15:36 (fourteen years ago)

the 21 foot guy returns

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fkVn8kSmqaw

― ASPIE Rocky (dayo), Friday, 11 November 2011 16:27 (fourteen years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AG2mgFEseSI

― citation needed (Steve Shasta), Friday, 11 November 2011 23:13 (fourteen years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJsZAcAltTM

― am0n, Monday, 14 November 2011 18:31 (fourteen years ago)

all the related vids are killing me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=osYz1ZMAvMQ

― ASPIE Rocky (dayo), Monday, 14 November 2011 18:33 (fourteen years ago)

Skipping 5807 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

This thread has been locked by an administrator

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.