Damage ContrLOLz

lol @ teeth mountain and judge judy---"alright mama"

Apparently this is the myspace of alright mama dude

i'm sorry but i find this incredibly funny

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/02/25/nyregion/25chimp.html?sudsredirect=true

should have shot the person keeping him as a pet and making it drink wine.

fighting with a chimp is a serious business: http://www.oprah.com/oprahshow/Chimp-Attack-Victim-Charla-Nash-Shows-Her-Face

wine and ~~xanax~~

sounds like he was just taking a long weekend

well yeah because if you had a giant pet monkey you'd need to sedate it in case it rips your face off. because you are fucking stupid for keeping a pet anything-that-will-rip-your-face-off.

http://www.esquire.com/print-this/chimpanzee-attack-0409-3

As St. James confronted the chimp, the six-two former running back turned to find a second chimp — also a male, this one older and bigger — bearing down on him as well. With both hands, he pushed the bigger animal. Both chimps pounced. One of the animals grabbed him in a bear hug before chomping into the bone above his right eyebrow. He then stuck his finger in St. James's right eye, gouging it out. The same animal clamped his teeth onto St. James's nose, biting it off, as the other chimp chewed away at St. James's fingers. In the melee, one of the chimps dug in his claws and ripped the skin off the right side of St. James's face, causing it to flop over and cover his left eye, temporarily blinding him. One of the primates sunk his teeth into St. James's skull. He then closed his jaws on St. James's mouth, ripping off his lips and most of his teeth. St. James tried to put one of his hands down the animal's throat, but the chimp just kept chewing on it and chewing on it, and he couldn't get it out.

St. James fell to the ground, no longer able to defend himself, and for at least five minutes, the mauling continued as he lay helpless. One of the chimps gnawed on his buttocks and bit off his genitals. They ravaged his left foot, leaving it shredded. Blood poured from his body, and LaDonna was screaming.

well yeah because if you had a giant pet monkey you'd need to sedate it in case it rips your face off. because you are fucking stupid for keeping a pet anything-that-will-rip-your-face-off.

what about dogs

Only time I hear about dogs ripping someones face off is when they are trained to attack?

bit off his genitals.

Pets have a gentle way of reminding humans they are not meant to be kept as pets.

so shocked re: ~killer~ whale ~~killing~~ someone

there was a facepalm.jpg headline somewhere about how the whale acted like nothing happened afterward

being temporarily blinded by one side of my torn-off face while three chimps are tearing off my balls and fingers is probably tops on a list of things I really never want to happen to me.

never say never dude

being temporarily blinded by one side of my torn-off face while three chimps chicks are tearing off my balls and fingers is probably tops on a list of things I really never want to happen to me.

tbh it would probably take a whole lot of baby chickens in order to tear off your balls and fingers.

jesus christ guys thanks for the bummers

you'll live

I would be honored to get merc'd by a killer whale

rolling on the floor laughing out loud here guys

if you had to go, i mean

loooooooooooooollllllllll loving the judge judy

thankfully i don't have to go

rolling on the floor laughing out loud here guys

― the descent of mayne (am0n), Thursday, February 25, 2010 11:05 AM (2 minutes ago)

is this sincere

did am0n really roflol

http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kydggsnphp1qzpwi0o1_500.jpg

http://theync.com/thumbs/960-amazing-video-of-a-killer-whale-throwing-a-seal-100-feet-into-the-air.JPG

this has gotta be fun for at least a second right

x-post uhhhhhhhh

teeth mountain = new favorite band

kate is nasty

http://i205.photobucket.com/albums/bb52/The_Playlist/movies/the-shining-bear-shot.jpg

kate is nasty

― shite new answers (cutty), Thursday, February 25, 2010 11:35 AM

in bed?

on the trap kit

http://riotclitshave.com/2010.02/tumblr_kw7e900Hl31qzj6xlo1_500.jpg

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2010/02/25/reid.old.hotdog.news12?hpt=C2

shit that looks like an onion article but isn't

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcDeHR2wd1U

http://www.1in3likeme.com/

whoopeepee

gottagoberg

i wish i ate at feldman's or knew it existed before they closed it down. i always went to nathan's :(

whiney u should go to the exhibit and eat the fossilized weiner

haha whiney you could make various humorous remarks while eating it e.g. "damn, this weiner got hard," etc.

well formed remarks

"damn this weiner got hard... and this hot dog is pretty old too!"

or, "they found this weiner frozen in a block of ice, you say? sounds more like a cold dog to me!"

(obviously these are just suggestions, i'm sure you could come up with something better, after all you are the writer)