What will happen in Spider-Man 3

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I mean, I don't really care, but had a soft spot for the Topher Grace vs Tobey Maguire pictures posted on this article by LArry Young. Clone Saga y'all.
http://www.comicbookresources.com/columns/index.cgi?column=loosecannon&article=2198

― Pete (Pete), Tuesday, 26 July 2005 14:14 (eighteen years ago) link

I think he may be on to something. Or on something.

― Huk-L (Huk-L), Tuesday, 26 July 2005 14:33 (eighteen years ago) link

Except for that it would obviously have to be Jake Gyllenhaal.

― Occam, Tuesday, 26 July 2005 16:14 (eighteen years ago) link

Hobgoblin and the Lizard.

― jel -- (jel), Tuesday, 26 July 2005 16:31 (eighteen years ago) link

Oh, I hope it's not the clone thing. Just hearing about it was confusing and exhausting, I'm glad I never read those comics.

― Leon C. (Ex Leon), Tuesday, 26 July 2005 17:30 (eighteen years ago) link

It'll be clones and you'll love it!

― Huk-L (Huk-L), Tuesday, 26 July 2005 17:57 (eighteen years ago) link

LOVE IT I tell ya!

The fact that they only have 2 hours, and not 3 years, to tell the story will definitely help.

― David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 26 July 2005 17:59 (eighteen years ago) link

They won't be making it up entirely as they go along either. Unless Raimi uses a Casino-Royale-style directing method.

― Vic Fluro, Tuesday, 26 July 2005 18:01 (eighteen years ago) link

Also, MJ's clone will be played by Maggie Gylneonononaldhal in the first act, Sandra (JM) Bullock in the second, and former wrestler Chyyynaaahh in the third act.

― Huk-L (Huk-L), Tuesday, 26 July 2005 18:22 (eighteen years ago) link

I kill you with sticky goo, Huk.

― Leeeeeee (Leee), Tuesday, 26 July 2005 18:56 (eighteen years ago) link

Wasn't Maggie Grace, or some similarly attractive starlet, talking about testing for S3 as the Black Cat?

― scamperingalpaca (Chris Hill), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 03:06 (eighteen years ago) link

Thomas Haden Church is The Chameleon.

― Vermont Girl (Vermont Girl), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 15:15 (eighteen years ago) link

HELL YEAH!

― David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 15:22 (eighteen years ago) link

Quite an esoteric choice. They need a second villain, who Spider-Man can actually FITE - The Lizard, maybe.

― chap who would dare to thwart the revolution (chap), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 15:38 (eighteen years ago) link

That's kind of awesome.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 15:39 (eighteen years ago) link

KEENAN IVORY WAYANS AS THE ROCKET RACER

― David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 15:50 (eighteen years ago) link

DMX as the Hypno Hustler

― Mark C (Markco), Thursday, 28 July 2005 07:16 (eighteen years ago) link

Replace DMX with Snoop (DMX is far too melodramatic to play that role), and you'd have THE BEST FILM EVER!

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 28 July 2005 07:47 (eighteen years ago) link

Isn't Ghostface Killah a huge Marvel buff? He even calls himself Tony Starks/Ironman. They should hire him to play a supervillain... Or even better, Ironman himself! Wasn't there a black Ironman at some point?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 28 July 2005 07:51 (eighteen years ago) link

GHOSTFACE IS LUKE CAGE

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 28 July 2005 12:11 (eighteen years ago) link

METHOD MAN AS THE HUMAN TORCH

― David R. (popshots75`), Thursday, 28 July 2005 13:45 (eighteen years ago) link

RZA AS THE WATCHER

― David R. (popshots75`), Thursday, 28 July 2005 13:45 (eighteen years ago) link

ODB AS CAPTAIN AMERICA

― David R. (popshots75`), Thursday, 28 July 2005 13:45 (eighteen years ago) link

The Beastie Boys as Fing, Fang & Foom!

― Huk-L (Huk-L), Thursday, 28 July 2005 13:59 (eighteen years ago) link

SISTER SOULJAH AS CAPTAIN MARVEL!

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:24 (eighteen years ago) link

Re: "Wasn't there a black Ironman at some point?

-- Tuomas (tuomas.alh...), July 28th, 2005.

Yes.

Tempted to leave it at that, mostly because even though I read a lot of those issues, details escape me; still, good old internet, eh?
Turns out the black Iron Man was Jim Rhodes, who was Iron Man for a while when Tony Stark was being drunk all the time. Later, he became an armoured hero called War Machine; his own comic only lasted twenty-five issues, probably because it came out at a time when all Marvel comics sucked, so it sucked.

David

― David Simpson (David Simpson), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:52 (eighteen years ago) link

War Machine???
Off to the literal stick thread with that one.

― Huk-L (Huk-L), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:55 (eighteen years ago) link

I think he was a member of FORCE WORKS, too. And he was part of The Crew, Priest's shoulda / coulda team follow-up to Black Panther.

― David R. (popshots75`), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:19 (eighteen years ago) link

War Machine vs Steel FITE

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:28 (eighteen years ago) link

(Why wasn't there ever a black version of Wonder Woman or Captain America?)

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:29 (eighteen years ago) link

Wasn't there a black CapAm?

― Huk-L (Huk-L), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:40 (eighteen years ago) link

USAgent was white! Was there another one?

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:43 (eighteen years ago) link

Yeah (according to Truth, the highly controversial best-selling mini by Robert Morales & Kyle Baker). Also, the CapAm analogue in Young Avengers (The Patriot) is black.

― David R. (popshots75`), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:47 (eighteen years ago) link

So controversial I've never heard of it! (Yes, I am a total X-Zombie.)

Where is the black Aquaman???

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:51 (eighteen years ago) link

(Oh that's right, black people don't swim.)

― The Ghost of Subpar Standup At Best (Dan Perry), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:52 (eighteen years ago) link

Blaquaman!

― Huk-L (Huk-L), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:28 (eighteen years ago) link

GIGGLETITS

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:53 (eighteen years ago) link

HOLY FUCK:
http://www.speakeasy.org/~sosinc/comics/blacka1.gif

http://www.smellofsteve.com/comics/blackaqua/blackaquaindex.html

― Huk-L (Huk-L), Thursday, 28 July 2005 17:14 (eighteen years ago) link

Wow. That should be funny... but it isn't. It's whatever the absolute inverse of "funny" is.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 28 July 2005 17:19 (eighteen years ago) link

Yeah, he somehow manages to avoid all of the comedic possibilities inherent in both being black and being Aquaman. It's kind of astounding, and almost admirable.

― Huk-L (Huk-L), Thursday, 28 July 2005 17:27 (eighteen years ago) link

From what I recall, Truth says that the first Captain America was black (on solid "we're not going to test this first on a white guy" principles), but hushed up (he's still alive and everything). He turns up in The Crew as well, and Patriot in Young Avengers is his grandson.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Thursday, 28 July 2005 18:59 (eighteen years ago) link

Yeah yeah yeah - forgot about Patriot = grandson. And didn't his SON show up in The Crew?

― David R. (popshots75`), Thursday, 28 July 2005 19:02 (eighteen years ago) link

quadrant nine?

― s1ocki (slutsky), Thursday, 28 July 2005 19:02 (eighteen years ago) link

three months pass...

― Austin Still (Austin, Still), Monday, 7 November 2005 04:48 (eighteen years ago) link

What the fuck? You can't just invent a belt, Sam Raimi. THat goes against cannon!

― Huk-L (Huk-L), Monday, 7 November 2005 05:07 (eighteen years ago) link

Er, without that belt those trousers would fall down.
Which would be embarrassing.

― David Simpson (David Simpson), Monday, 7 November 2005 10:07 (eighteen years ago) link

I honestly can't wait until they show that that 70's show guy as venom.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Monday, 7 November 2005 10:26 (eighteen years ago) link

He's got a 'I look like a hardcase but I will have moral struggles and turn good at teh final moment' look about him.

― Vic Fluro (Vic Fluro), Monday, 7 November 2005 12:41 (eighteen years ago) link

Somewhat less likely:

― Austin Still (Austin, Still), Monday, 7 November 2005 13:16 (eighteen years ago) link

er, sorry...

― Austin Still (Austin, Still), Monday, 7 November 2005 13:23 (eighteen years ago) link

ouch

― Huk-L (Huk-L), Monday, 7 November 2005 14:44 (eighteen years ago) link

That better not be the SpiderNad picture.

― David R. (popshots75`), Monday, 7 November 2005 14:47 (eighteen years ago) link

No, that is the picture where we discover how much Robert Mapplethorpe owes to John Romita Jr.

― Austin Still (Austin, Still), Monday, 7 November 2005 14:54 (eighteen years ago) link

I don't really like Venom much at all, but that 70s Venom is something that makes me a bit exctied.

― Suedey (John Cei Douglas), Monday, 7 November 2005 16:55 (eighteen years ago) link

He was really good in In Good Company. Though I still think Dennis Quaid would be a better Venom. But I guess they're saving DQ to play OLD MAN HLA ORNDJA

― Huk-L (Huk-L), Monday, 7 November 2005 16:59 (eighteen years ago) link

What a bizarre film In Good Company is. Excellent, but bizarre.

― Pete (Pete), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 14:55 (eighteen years ago) link

one year passes...

I don't know whether to sigh or to shproing.

Kirsten Dunst: “If I was Mary Jane from the comics I’d be walking around in lingerie saying, ‘Hey tiger’ all day.”

― Leee, Friday, 27 April 2007 02:23 (sixteen years ago) link

Given she also wants to star in a Spidey flick where she gives birth to 8 Spider-Babies (as in EIGHT-LEGGED FREAKS), then, um, I dunno.

― David R., Friday, 27 April 2007 04:03 (sixteen years ago) link

I think this film is going to be a bit of a mess. Four villains!

― chap, Friday, 27 April 2007 12:25 (sixteen years ago) link

Uh, three villains I mean. Unless you count DEEP INTERNAL STRUGGLE as a villain.

― chap, Friday, 27 April 2007 12:28 (sixteen years ago) link

each one will advance the plot, though:

Sandman - I want revenge! ooh, black suit...
Goblin - oops, revenge is bad when you disfigure your buddy, bad black suit
Venom - FINALE

― Roberto Spiralli, Friday, 27 April 2007 14:07 (sixteen years ago) link

I think this film is going to be a bit of a mess. Four villains!
...
Uh, three villains I mean. Unless you count DEEP INTERNAL STRUGGLE as a villain.

You know, an article I read has something interesting to say about these numbers. (Don't remember which page it appears on.)

Given she also wants to star in a Spidey flick where she gives birth to 8 Spider-Babies (as in EIGHT-LEGGED FREAKS), then, um, I dunno.

Watching her feed her inner shlock is my idea of a good time.

― Leee, Friday, 27 April 2007 19:45 (sixteen years ago) link

And if you're hypervigilant about spoilers, that link provides some very broadly defined spoilers.

― Leee, Friday, 27 April 2007 19:48 (sixteen years ago) link

Lordy, Tobey and Kiki were vacuous on Jonathan Ross last night.

― chap, Sunday, 29 April 2007 02:23 (sixteen years ago) link

my ladyfriend just emailed me to say that Superman 3 is playing at our neighbourhood single-screen theatre. I spent half an hour trying to figure out why they would do such a thing (they do sometimes show rep films) before it clicked.

― Dr. Superman, Friday, 4 May 2007 19:03 (sixteen years ago) link

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