cat person

no I agree exactly with what your reading. she notices behavior and reacts to it ( after having created a narcissistic fantasy based on nothing but his attraction to her) but doesn’t think of it as bad or good. part of why she loses any physical attraction to him, it seemed to me, is he showed evidence of being an unresponsive lover, though she was also uncommunicative.

she seemed was never particularly interested in or attracted to Robert at any point but enjoyed being desired by someone,

not really true, at various points there is some (very nicely written) language about her feeling a crush!

xxp to soref

(which dissipated when she realized he was kind of a small, petty person) xp

I think the fact that she notes his weight as appealing early on, and then experiences it as revolting while having sex she doesn’t want to have with him later is evidence of the kind of thing I’m talking about

btw i keep thinking of him saying "hey, concession-stand girl" even after learning her name and it makes me cringe

Again, the grouping term for that last clause is ‘male’.

infinity I have no idea what you are talking about; don’t get how dominant submissive relationships entered the conversation really

Er many xps to flappy bird.

flappy

i guess deceive cld be a strong word. what wld u call it? withholding info?

sure, again i chalk it up to being in a new situation and not necessarily knowing what to do. & i was responding to the dom/sub observation re: robert's prickish putdown attitude toward her from the very beginning, which idk his particular brand of negging didn't remind me of a dom/sub thing at all. but that was just my take

sure

makes it hard to talk abt robert tho i guess bc not much is revealed abt him

other than his love for red vines

will never look at red vines consumers ever again tbh

ha *the same, but that works too

not much is revealed of him aside from his easily recognized behavioral patterns that match those of people with bad sexual politics (is there another way to put that?)

easily for some, less easily for others

yeah, i feel like plenty is revealed

these numbers are always fake tho right, if she sells a million books then theyll give her the a million dollars, a publicity stunt

not sure what you mean by this, if the advance is $1m, she'll probably get $400k now, $300k when she turns in the manuscript, $300k on publication, the money is hers whether she sells a single copy or not, so long as she actually turns in a book

will never look at red vines consumers ever again tbh

sort of surprised "red vines" has not already been "reclaimed" as a performative candy choice by rotten people

i never even heard of red vines before the story! are they the same thing as twizzlers?

really??

I think the fact that she notes his weight as appealing early on, and then experiences it as revolting while having sex she doesn’t want to have with him later is evidence of the kind of thing I’m talking about

I didn't see this so much as evidence that his weight only became repulsive to her as she notices his personality flaws or that he's an unresponsive lover, more that she felt some degree of repulsion from the beginning, which was appealing in a way when it could be used as part of an ego boosting fantasy but unpleasant when she actually sleeps with him and feels dragged down to his level? like, the fantasy is based on the idea that she can remain 'above' him, enjoy being desired without being begrimed or without any change to her position/status, but t doesn't play out like that in practise

I think the story says that the moment she realises she wasn't going to get anything positive out of the encounter is when he asks her if she's a virgin, and she laughs b/c she remembers how carefully she chose when and how and who with she lost her virginity, and the idea that her first time would be with this loser in this awkward/tawdry situation is ridiculous to her - but she it's driven home to her that Robert sees this encounter in a different way to her and she feels obliged to apologise and tacitly accept his framing on their sex act, which is one where it does 'count' and is part of her life story or whatever, rather than one where she remains uncontaminated - it seems like this is when the power dynamic shifts and she's lost control of the narrative

are red vines a regional thing? i've only ever lived in the northeast & mid-atlantic and all we have are twizzlers

lol holy shit marcos i didn't see your post

yeah, i feel like plenty is revealed

― horseshoe, Thursday, December 21, 2017 1:53 PM (nine minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

otm! there was a good post earlier itt (difficult listening hour i think?) about why we don't need to hear this story from robert's perspective because we already know it

lol xp

here is the post i was talking about, otm imo

imo the male perspective is p much already there. for instance by the end you are as aware of the emotion induced in him by her laugh as you are of the emotion in her that caused it. so is she. having read this version of the story i felt pretty clear on what had happened to both the characters. the reverse however would not be true: he does not know even at the end what she is feeling and a story from his pov would not incorporate hers. huh.

― difficult listening hour, Monday, December 11, 2017 3:03 PM (one week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

maybe they really are regional. i can't recall if red vines are sold in IL or NY, but they're everywhere in California. they are a Cali company.

i'd heard of them before and tbh thought they were one of tarantino's fake brand names i.e. candy apple cigarettes

you kidding, we smoked Candy Apples all the time back in the day

ohh nvm i'm thinking of Red Apple Cigarettes

You know was an asshole? That roommate who obnoxiously sent the fuckoff text.

to soref, she does muse on how his weight is cute or something early on. I don’t think she’s repulsed by him at the beginning. Perhaps not v deeply interested in him either, except as a prop to her self-image, but that is how dating can be when you don’t know someone yet.

the idea that her first time would be with this loser in this awkward/tawdry situation is ridiculous to her -

not how I read this. I read her laughter as more at his (telling) image of her as virginal and “pure,” whereas she’s sexually experienced. I don’t think she thinks of him in such clearly derisive terms as “loser” though I agree she enjoys feeling the “power” of being perhaps cooler and possibly more sexually experienced than he is. (I think by this point she’s been kissed, poorly, by him.)

Yes, a very nasty moment - I really liked it. xp to quincie

I mean Robert may have handled the rejection better were it not done in such a dick move.

I think dudes getting aggravated that a woman might consider a guy fat, or base her attraction on something tenuous like her perception of his interest, is telling. Navigating whether you’re attracted to someone, and why, is something you have to take on when you’re dating, and figuring out the other person’s motivations can flip your own feelings on the matter. Once it became clear in this story that the man’s reasons for finding her attractive weren’t intellectual and he stopped showing interest in her interests, and even started tearing down what he perceived were her interests, she started seeing him more in the same terms he was using

otm

I mean Robert may have handled the rejection better were it not done in such a dick move.

laughing was a dick move? idk. wasn't an inappropriate or gross question to ask if she was a virgin but if your ego is so fragile that you take nervous laughter as rejection i have no sympathy, like mh said navigating this stuff thru rocky terrain assures that your ego will take some hits, comes with the territory, get over yourself etc.

i think quincie meant the abrupt breakup text the roommate sent Robert. but I still think he would have had his vituperative episode either way.

Ohh right on, and yeah i agree

i read the r u a virgin q as the narrator suggesting how completely inexperienced and unaware this guy is

i also think this dude is a massive loser btw

I think he’s completely average, he just missed the point where his peers coupled up and had kids so he seems more dire as a mid-30s man acting in this way

his peer group is definitely the “I didn’t really respect women until I had a wife/daughter” type

she started seeing him more in the same terms he was using
there's a point at the end of each of my erased explanations of this whole thing where it always turns into "and he became a cat person"

the story is called cat person
i think the way he evolves in her eyes is a big part of the story's purpose/point/main idea/short answer question

I feel like calling the character a loser kind of reinscribes his worldview? the truth is men who view themselves as vulnerable on the dating market are totes capable of winding up with a woman they might view as prettier or better than them in whatever way they categorize these things. the question of whether they’re going to actually respond to that woman as a person is a separate one.

the very idea that he would ask someone he had just gotten drunk and taken home RIGHT BEFORE they do it whether or not she is a virgin is one of the more disgusting things he does

he is so gross
mh otm about his friends

horseshoe - where was that article about men being bad at losing?

in nplusone. Hang on; I’ll find it.

https://nplusonemag.com/issue-30/the-intellectual-situation/in-the-maze/

ohh wait i forgot that they went to the bar before they had sex, i should read it again.

i like the discussion itt, haven't talked about it with anyone else yet, again it's amazing and cool that a short story went viral and spread so quickly, and is still generating so much talk 10 days after it was published

omg also this is so otm
the question of whether they’re going to actually respond to that woman as a person is a separate one.