Rolling Avian Issues Thread

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-uwShih4QAfs/Ub8629pRYqI/AAAAAAAAKjA/xEwj1IhxikQ/s1600/bird-problems-poster-01.jpg

http://www.birdbusta.net/sites/72/images/swfimage_home_1.jpg

LJ - do you have any current avian issues your fellow ILAFL posters can help you with?

theoretical structural avian issues case study -- the owls of the royal london borough of kensington and chelsea are creating unsolicited noise past the 23:00 threshold beyond which environmental health law might be employed to curtail wanton festivity or force the all england club to postpone prolix quarter finals, yet there appears to be no legally actionable remedy against the owls, and the environmental-communitarian praxis supplanting that law prohibits the reasonable suggestions of the local citizenry and nondomiciled residents that all trees or treelike growths or structures be removed in order to coerce rustication among strigiformes and lesser diurnal avians, just as unwanted housing benefit claimants can now be swiftly despatched to the provinces in the manner of tudor mendicants.....what is to be done?

clearly tree destruction is out of the question but there is no statute mandating inviolable life-rights of rodentine vermin such as provide owls their primary nutritional source. perhaps the solution would be to bioengineer a disease that swiftly and entirely obviates the urban rat and mouse population, and simply observe the owls radiate away from the royal boroughs in search of prey

god there is that really unpleasant gif of a load of owls sitting together and one of them eating a live rat, i don't want to see it again but it's probably worth searching the other owl threads for to see just once

that is a good plan but killing rats is virtually impossible, from memory there are only a few sub-arctic islands and remote canadian prairie settlements without rats, the combined biosciences/big pharma expertise of the borough's plutocracy would surely find it easier just to engineer a virus to kill owls along with pigeons, sparrows and other avian plebes, while leaving the rats so they can feed imperial golden eagles and peacocks or whatever

i saw an absolutely enormous rat the size of a squirrel on borough high street yesterday. it was dragging half a hotdog along. popped into a cranny, then briefly re-emerged as if to parade its scavengings before my friend and i

the flaw in your latest plan is that raptors are usually far more susceptible to disease than more complex/'developed' passerine species - and if you wipe out the insectivores you essentially eliminate the foodsource of most larger carnivores, unless the butchers of the parish are willing to cast out offal when the eagle's cry is heard. peacocks, their cry aside, are fairly dismal birds and will surely succumb to road traffic inside half a week. barring total avian apocalypse, the solution will unfortunately have to involve top-down ecosystemic change, and this would by definition involve the introduction of a species which preys on owls - perhaps a genetically modified race of cuckoos that will target larger bird species, causing a dip in all non-passerine numbers, before settling on woodpigeon as their primary host after all the owls are gone

of course, let us not forget that the problem is not the owls per se but the owls' noise. it would not be difficult to electrify every strigiforme eyrie and train the owls by aversion therapy to not hoot. this is of course assuming they have the cerebral capacity to register causality. failing this, fry the bastards - most owls take formerly-used nests as their home, so immigrants will soon meet the same fate without extra expenditure locating and installing the apparatus. might get a few opportunistic crows into the bargain; quod callidus erat, fatalis est

of course, quod is neuter singular, and 'callidus' is not, occasioning great anguish in my breast. the second time this week i have fallen foul of latinate gendered endings on ilx

Easy for you to say the owls shouldnt give a hoot, but it does raise the issue of the right of the owl to issue his call and raises a vital question, to wit: to who does the owl cry in the dark

that's far too good for excelsior

Clumsy enough imo and leaving out the m after who now has my mind on ents but there you are

sometimes the speed of wit exceeds perfection

Too wit to rue

tourette's too, you

e's avian laugh

oiseaux serious

Threatening to revisit the great duckjoke threads

skrue mcduck thread is possibly all-time ilx top 5

Ya

In aon chur, oiseaux serious? Parceque je ne suis pas serein, non

trilingual puns are possibly where I tap out - too many pidgins accruing

i saw an absolutely enormous rat the size of a squirrel on borough high street yesterday. it was dragging half a hotdog along. popped into a cranny, then briefly re-emerged as if to parade its scavengings before my friend and i

― imago, Tuesday, 18 March 2014 00:27 (40 minutes ago)

so gross, although squirrel sized rats are not uncommon it's just their bushy tails suggest they are larger, rats the size of cats still one of the grottiest images in nursery rhyme law

there is probably some maoist insurrectionary out there catalyzing rat fecundity in rich districts, if superprime london housing is going to increase at 10% p/a for the rest of time like those panglossian fund managers are saying, then rat infestations would for sure do the reverse

in which case those fund managers should invest in industrial owl farms, how to get these asocial birds to pullulate and counter-infest

Just turns into a ratrace tho

trouble with owls is that they tend to leave pullulates of rat keratin & bone everywhere; this will reduce the problem but won't eradicate it entirely

of course, if the owls manage to control the rat population, they effectively control their own population, leading to a boom/bust cycle that may at length synchronise with that of the housing market

spotted today: group of about 8 or 9 bright young marketing types with tons of extremely expensive camera equipment in Maryon Park, one of whom was prancing around on the grass throwing bits of bread high into the air

upon questioning it transpired that they were attempting to serenade 'the birds' to come and parade on film

i dispensed the cursory advice that a feeding-table near plant cover and a modicum of patience might be more lucrative, and left them to their mad march rite, the invocation of the Perfect Footage

they seemed impatient, alas. how, then, could they have obtained their quarry? the crass among you may suggest cgi, the artful a complex system of capture nets, digitally removed in postproduction, leaving only the frenzied oscillations of the afternoon chorus

did you ask any of them out?

I do adore our avian comrades but I don't think it'd work. We'd be too similar

wrong sized bottoms?

only end up fighting over the blood sausage

it's that impressive, eh?

this line of enquiry has me discomfited and i would prefer we address the accounted predicament

well that's a first

do u have any opinions on herons

we can be herons
if just for one day

you kids stay off the heron now, that shit'll mess you up

the german version of that could have been 'herren' with a little license

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DPHi9VIC9a8

yes

they are especially wonderful in flight - great, loping wings, instantly identifiable - and their terrestrial repose is exemplary

they are also surprisingly sly - I once raised a camera to capture a very peaceable-seeming specimen outside charing cross hospital in hammersmith, but upon inspection, the image was heron-free. it had flown, silently, in the moment of its chronicling

there is an intelligence in their eye that does not belong to many other non-passerines

i hear there are exemplary specimens in delaware

m8

they seem to have small bottoms

wading birds tend to be dolicocephalic, ectomorphic and micropygous

without looking up

big-headed, long-limbed, small-footed

ectomorphic is prob wrong

you don't know what she looks like?

http://i.imgur.com/8jIul8X.gif

i'd pleur that furrow! har de har har

oh as in callipygic

ffs micropodal wd be small footed

truly this is the thread of my classical education's undoing

earlier this week my boss told us about the time he stole a hummingbird egg from london zoo

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/1/18/Apotheosis.jpg

those morbid corvids!

not graving but dining

There it is

lol

WARNING GRAPHIC CONTENT: GORY IMAGES OF INJURED PIGEON

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3444471/Horrifying-pictures-capture-moment-seagull-DEVOURS-baby-pigeon-shock-city-centre-shoppers.html

notice how the gull stands athwart the pigeon during the enjoyment of his food

ilx has a lot of avian issues this week
XD

The Eurasian jay was one of the many species originally described by Linnaeus in his 18th century work Systema Naturae. He recognised its affinity with other corvids, naming it Corvus glandarius.[2]

there is a pair of these living nearby; they are a common normcore avian, though i have seldom seen them so close. they tend to flit around hyperactively in the trees, not yet quite in leaf. they look raffish without being either lowering in the manner of higher corvids, or delinquent in the manner of magpies which they otherwise resemble. the differences with the latter are instructive; swole rather than hench, less agitated though probably more agile. their footwork for a comparatively large avian is extraorindary, they seem to float above the branches as if cushioned by miniature air max 90s. they resist anthropomorphization more than the other corvids. they do not seem to have any affective idiosyncracies; their colouration may be lurid but they are otherwise neutral, typified by a sort of motivic listlessness that allows them do very little in any purposive sense, while seldom settling athwart any particular branch for very long.

whichever smartarse decided 'garrulus' was a more appropriate genus name deserves a particularly crass tick

also welcome back, etc

the bit about being cushioned by miniature air max 90s is the most on-point observation; they really do seem to flow about vegetation, rather than crash from branch to branch with the hyperbolic tail-dipping radge of a magpie. you get a lot of them near where i live.

saw a rufous hummingbird while taking a piss in a bush on Vancouver's "beer island" the other day. exceptional avian to observe whilst micturating

they don't make all that much noise, again especially compared to magpies and the noise they do make is less distinctive than that of most other corvids.

it's less insistent and noisy than most corvid cries, yes, but it can be quite copious. it's still a weird choice for 'garrulus'

had no idea hummingbirds went as far north as canada, truly the galapagos penguin of hummingbirds

how do you rate these normcore avians:

http://i.imgur.com/AkIDZfD.jpg

5, 9, 10

I took pains to determine the flight of crook-taloned
birds, marking which were of the right by nature, and
which of the left, and what were their ways of living, each
after his kind, and the enmities and affections that were
between them, and how they consorted together.

https://twitter.com/onlyloveHH/status/723616680929275905

It is clear that Khan doesn’t think there is much merit in appearing close to Corbyn in any way, even now that he has won his election. But what will be interesting is how critical the new Mayor decides to be of his party leader. Labour moderates are hoping that at the very least he will be what one described as ‘another woodpecker at the tree’, chipping away at the party leadership with similar comments to the ones he made over the weekend about the importance of actually winning elections.

https://www.theguardian.com/music/2016/jun/20/catalogue-doiseaux-review-pierre-laurent-aimard-aldeburgh-festival#img-2

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3649724/Hats-ladies-just-make-look-silly-Anna-Friel-hits-Royal-Ascot-pigeon-head-QUENTIN-LETTS-explains-isn-t-fan.html

took like 30 binocular-zoomed photos of what i assumed was an exotic falcon species in cyprus recently, turns out it was a common kestrel

kestrels are dope tho

Yup. One thing I'll miss about living in methil is that one of the old guys here keeps pigeons,which I enjoyed hanging out with.

damn why wasn't i at that messiaen thing

yh obv it was still a beautiful bird posing magnificently before a lighthouse

i might post a photo

http://i.imgur.com/Ho4moUB.jpg

dignified bird

immensely so

i saw a barred owl, during the day, on saturday. i had never seen an owl irl before in the wild.

im fostering a pomeranian right now and the owl looked at him in a way that caused me some panic.

on reflection it was possibly a barn owl

post pics of the pom, por favor!

http://i674.photobucket.com/albums/vv105/NAPOLEONROFL/dog/Screen%20Shot%202017-06-26%20at%2010.07.22%20AM.png

trying to work out which avians would be able to turn the aforepictured into lunch

perhaps the very largest strigiforms

yeah he likely wouldn't have had much of a chance of eating him but he did stare at him quite intently. the dog didn't realize what was going on so i picked him up, the owl followed us for a short time - well we walked further along the trail and he flew from behind us to in front of us twice before deciding to stay perched on the branch and no bother with us anymore.

adorable!

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-50180781

Russian scientists tracking migrating eagles ran out of money after some of the birds flew to Iran and Pakistan and their SMS transmitters drew huge data roaming charges.

After learning of the team's dilemma, Russian mobile phone operator Megafon offered to cancel the debt and put the project on a special, cheaper tariff.

The team had started crowdfunding on social media to pay off the bills.

The birds left from southern Russia and Kazakhstan.

The journey of one steppe eagle, called Min, was particularly expensive, as it flew to Iran from Kazakhstan.

Min accumulated SMS messages to send during the summer in Kazakhstan, but it was out of range of the mobile network. Unexpectedly the eagle flew straight to Iran, where it sent the huge backlog of messages.

The price per SMS in Kazakhstan was about 15 roubles (18p; 30 US cents), but each SMS from Iran cost 49 roubles. Min used up the entire tracking budget meant for all the eagles.

looool

they are getting louder during this time of quarantine

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-52779727

Plucky water bird stabs eagle in heart with beak

Canada v US: Loon stabs eagle through heart

i wonder what the most outrageous birdfight upset of all time is. inevitably unseen by human eye. 45,000 years ago a sparrow offed a swan, kind of thing

lots of baby seagulls around where I live now. a bit too far away for me to get good pictures but they look like this:

http://wildlifeambulance.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/gull-chicks.jpg

'ello

what fine little fellows

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2023/jul/02/sandringham-royal-estate-linked-to-many-deaths-and-disappearances-of-protected-birds

The Guardian has documented 18 cases of alleged shootings, poisonings and disappearances of rare birds and related incidents linked to the Sandringham estate or surrounding land owned by the king

2003
Red kite found dead, poisoned by two highly toxic insecticides on farmland owned by Sandringham. No suspect identified

December 2005
Tawny owl was put down after being badly injured in an illegal trap. The owl had significant levels of toxic rat killer in its body. A Sandringham gamekeeper fined £500 and £470 costs

May 2007
A marsh harrier found dead on the boundary of Sandringham estate, suspected poisoning by toxic pesticides. No suspect identified

October 2007
Two female hen harriers were shot over Sandringham estate. The police searched part of the estate. Prince Harry, a friend and the head gamekeeper were interviewed by police. The birds were not recovered and no one was prosecuted

October 2009
A sparrowhawk found on Sandringham estate poisoned by an insecticide, next to a dead pigeon laced with it. The police and Health and Safety Executive searched Sandringham buildings. They did not find the same substance but uncovered “significant safety issues” with pesticides rule breaches. Warning letter sent to Sandringham

August 2014
A female montagu’s harrier, Britain’s rarest bird of prey, disappeared on land owned by Sandringham. It was fitted with a satellite tag, which also disappeared. No offence could be detected

August 2016
A goshawk died near Sandringham House. Its body was incinerated by estate staff before it could be examined. Its satellite tag was posted back to the British Trust for Ornithology. No offence could be detected

September 2016
Up to 40 dead wood pigeons were found piled up near Sandringham estate visitors centre. One was alive and had blood coming from its beak. The next morning the birds had been removed before they could be examined by Natural England. No offence could be detected

March 2017
A dead stock dove was found close to where the dead wood pigeons were found in September 2016. Because of that previous case, it was investigated but believed to have died of natural causes

August 2017
Another female montagu’s harrier disappeared near the site of the first missing montagu’s harrier. Its satellite tag also disappeared. No offence could be detected

May 2020
A little owl was found dead in a Fenn trap, designed to catch stoats, on the Sandringham land. Those traps were no longer authorised for that purpose. Police said no offences were committed but the RSPCA gave advice to the head keeper to prevent this happening again

December 2020
Further Fenn traps and poisons were found by anti-snaring campaigners, who complained to Norfolk police. No offence recorded

January 2021
A fox was reported “spinning around” in distress in a snare on Sandringham, which led anti-snaring campaigners to be concerned about the estate

January 2021
A pet dog was trapped around its neck by a snare on Sandringham land. The dog owner complained

March 2021
A dead red kite was found on Snettisham beach, very close to Sandringham. Rat poisons and a shotgun pellet were detected by tests. Investigators could not identify a suspect

July 2021
More Fenn traps, river traps and snares, some with poisons, on Sandringham estate were reported to Natural England, and then followed up by the HSE. No action taken

August 2021
Rat poisons allegedly left in the open on Sandringham land. The HSE did not visit the rat poison locations, so no samples were analysed, but the case was added to its database

August 2022
More allegedly unauthorised traps found on Sandringham. Norfolk police investigated and stated they “don’t seem to comply with best practice at the very least”

avian best practices

a friend told me that he used to have a male duck that died because it couldn't put its dick away? Is this a common thing?

louis qk