I TROLLED JOSE CANSECO

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oh man

Mr. Que, Saturday, 6 March 2010 21:48 (nine years ago) link

holy shit, jose canseco said he's going to torture you and kill you!!

Pontiac Driving Excitement (Z S), Saturday, 6 March 2010 21:49 (nine years ago) link

*high five*

Pontiac Driving Excitement (Z S), Saturday, 6 March 2010 21:49 (nine years ago) link

this is legitimately the best thing that's ever happened in my life

jizzchin (J0rdan S.), Saturday, 6 March 2010 21:49 (nine years ago) link

congrats--you are going to die, via Jose Canseco roid rage

Mr. Que, Saturday, 6 March 2010 21:50 (nine years ago) link

man kill u

velko, Saturday, 6 March 2010 21:51 (nine years ago) link

do you think he knows that the torture is supposed to come first?

jizzchin (J0rdan S.), Saturday, 6 March 2010 21:53 (nine years ago) link

:DDDDDDDDDDD

how is "babby" horribly formed????? (k3vin k.), Saturday, 6 March 2010 21:53 (nine years ago) link

that was pretty good advice too!

Are Slimes the Jews of monsterdom? (cankles), Saturday, 6 March 2010 21:53 (nine years ago) link

im thinking u need to come back at him w/a classic 'just sayin' style response

ice cr?m, Saturday, 6 March 2010 21:56 (nine years ago) link

lol he blocked me

jizzchin (J0rdan S.), Saturday, 6 March 2010 21:56 (nine years ago) link

jizzchin, low life child molester

Mr. Que, Saturday, 6 March 2010 21:57 (nine years ago) link

http://z.about.com/d/weirdnews/1/0/v/R/-/-/JoseCansecoMugShot.jpg

velko, Saturday, 6 March 2010 21:59 (nine years ago) link

http://blacksportsonline.com/index/l80-2-719322.jpg

ice cr?m, Saturday, 6 March 2010 22:01 (nine years ago) link

http://twitter.com/JoseCanseco/status/10090718491

ice cr?m, Saturday, 6 March 2010 22:03 (nine years ago) link

^^blacksportsonline.com

xp

how is "babby" horribly formed????? (k3vin k.), Saturday, 6 March 2010 22:03 (nine years ago) link

fierce, dude

Fusty Moralizer (Dr Morbius), Saturday, 6 March 2010 22:03 (nine years ago) link

LOLLLLLLLLLL

Nice work Jordan.

t(o_o)t (ENBB), Saturday, 6 March 2010 22:04 (nine years ago) link

sub-custos?

✌.✰|ʘ‿ʘ|✰.✌ (Steve Shasta), Saturday, 6 March 2010 22:06 (nine years ago) link

I lol'ed at that.

Ballistic, Saturday, 6 March 2010 23:10 (nine years ago) link

Aww, I liked Custos.

ice cr?m abdul-jabbar (Leee), Saturday, 6 March 2010 23:15 (nine years ago) link

http://twitter.com/JoseCanseco/status/10047017759

am0n, Sunday, 7 March 2010 00:03 (nine years ago) link

That's awesome Jordan.

van smack, Sunday, 7 March 2010 00:14 (nine years ago) link

I remember Jose signed my '88 Fleer. My only Jose moment.

van smack, Sunday, 7 March 2010 00:15 (nine years ago) link

kind of sad but mostly sad

sanskrit, Sunday, 7 March 2010 00:29 (nine years ago) link

CANSECO DROPPIN' KNOWLEDGE

― dr. william idol (dr g), Tuesday, 29 November 2005 12:19 (4 years ago)

put your glans up for Detroit (haitch), Sunday, 7 March 2010 00:44 (nine years ago) link

I remember Jose signed my '88 Fleer. My only Jose moment

only baseball autograph I ever got was Sid Bream :/

Ballistic, Sunday, 7 March 2010 00:48 (nine years ago) link

dude Sid Bream is 100% kvlt! lots of people have Canseco autografs but only the truest have Sid Bream!

Lee Dorrian Gray (J0hn D.), Sunday, 7 March 2010 00:51 (nine years ago) link

I have a baseball card show dealer badge signed by Canseco. (saw him at a Bennigan's near Arlington Stadium after a game) He was very nice, and the blonde he was with had enormous boobs (I was 10, the boobs are pretty much all I remember of the experience).

FIST FIGHT! FIST FIGHT! FIST FIGHT IN THE PARKING LOT! (milo z), Sunday, 7 March 2010 01:31 (nine years ago) link

Just be glad you never got this autograph

http://bitsandpieces.us/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/imagesdickpole.jpg

van smack, Sunday, 7 March 2010 02:01 (nine years ago) link

ihttp://bitsandpieces.us/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/imagesdickpole.jpg

van smack, Sunday, 7 March 2010 02:01 (nine years ago) link

fuck, i give up (again!!)

How the fuck do you post pictures here?

van smack, Sunday, 7 March 2010 02:02 (nine years ago) link

arrgg. happened last night in the vinyl board too

van smack, Sunday, 7 March 2010 02:03 (nine years ago) link

why did the Mariners logo resemble satan's pitchfork?

Ballistic, Sunday, 7 March 2010 02:56 (nine years ago) link

nevermind, I get the Neptune 'trident' reference now.....bah

Ballistic, Sunday, 7 March 2010 02:56 (nine years ago) link

and jess begat ethan and ethan begat deej and deej begat jordan s and jordan s begat von smack

sanskrit, Sunday, 7 March 2010 03:45 (nine years ago) link

http://the115.files.wordpress.com/2008/10/josediginity3.jpg

van smack, Sunday, 7 March 2010 04:03 (nine years ago) link

lol tmz breaking news picture..

http://www.blogcdn.com/www.tmz.com/media/2008/10/1010_jose_bn_tmz_01.jpg

van smack, Sunday, 7 March 2010 04:06 (nine years ago) link

I like first line of his bio

"1st member of the 40/40 club."

that there deserves..

van smack, Sunday, 7 March 2010 04:19 (nine years ago) link

i'm still loling about the fact that Jose Canseco makes threats to civilians on twitter.

"DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM? I'M JOSE CANSECO!"

Ballistic, Sunday, 7 March 2010 07:18 (nine years ago) link

omfg

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Sunday, 7 March 2010 08:32 (nine years ago) link

trying not to wake the g/f with retardedlaughter!

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Sunday, 7 March 2010 08:32 (nine years ago) link

did you get any correspondence from aggrieved jose canseco fans

nakhchivan, Sunday, 7 March 2010 20:21 (nine years ago) link

Jose Canseco ✔ @JoseCanseco
Follow
2. @JebYork chokes on silver spoon, Lott new owner, hires Jimbo, 49ers win super bowl.

Problem: "Jeb" York isn't the CEO of the 49ers. That would be Jed York. This is impressive because "Jeb York" is a mock Twitter account created solely after Canseco insisted the 49ers' CEO was named Jeb.

priceless

♪♫_\o/_♫♪ (Karl Malone), Monday, 5 January 2015 18:48 (four years ago) link

remember the UFO/balloon guy? the one who faked his kid flying off in a homemade hot air balloon/ufo thingy...
Canseco and him are basically the same person now.

AKA Thermo Thinwall (The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall), Monday, 5 January 2015 18:55 (four years ago) link

three months pass...

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · 15m 15 minutes ago
Your caught on video return my stereo equipment that you ripped out of my suv yesterday or else.yes this is a threat

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · 13m 13 minutes ago
You have 24 hours plus leave 1k for the damage done to my suv..or else this is you only warning

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · 13m 13 minutes ago
I will come get you my self

slothroprhymes, Friday, 10 April 2015 20:15 (four years ago) link

one month passes...

icymi

http://stompersbaseball.com/stompers-present-jose-canseco-weekend-june-12-13/

can g4wker send J0rdan on assignment for this?

the increasing costive borborygmi (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 26 May 2015 17:54 (four years ago) link

said Stompers VP and general manager Theo Fightmaster

mookieproof, Tuesday, 26 May 2015 23:47 (four years ago) link

this is gonna make great effectively wild material

slothroprhymes, Tuesday, 26 May 2015 23:58 (four years ago) link

did B&S jointly cook this up i wonder

the increasing costive borborygmi (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 27 May 2015 01:02 (four years ago) link

two weeks pass...

josejosejosejose

http://gfycat.com/NervousAdmiredCarp

the increasing costive borborygmi (Dr Morbius), Monday, 15 June 2015 18:53 (four years ago) link

one month passes...

could that be the true manifestation of evil guide dog from that bizarro (and fascinating) thread you made ages ago that was recently bumped

slothroprhymes, Tuesday, 21 July 2015 18:26 (four years ago) link

i don't know, looks more like crazy eye dog to me

imagine waking up from a nap with that dog staring at you!

1992 ball boy (Karl Malone), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 18:31 (four years ago) link

or even the canine.

skateboards are the new combover (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 18:33 (four years ago) link

a linear combination of those faces made michael shannon

an asteroid could hit the planet (Sufjan Grafton), Tuesday, 21 July 2015 18:36 (four years ago) link

five months pass...

@JoseCanseco 2h2 hours ago
Congrats to Junior the 3rd teammate off my Springfield Nuclear Power Plant team to make the Baseball Hall of Fame! hug for Mike Piazza too

@JoseCanseco 59m59 minutes ago
If I were a vampire I could play independent baseball for ever

skateboards are the new combover (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 7 January 2016 04:02 (three years ago) link

there is little better than jose canseco using the subjunctive

mookieproof, Thursday, 7 January 2016 05:02 (three years ago) link

I'd forgotten that Wade Boggs was in the HOF!

Sofialo Ren (Leee), Thursday, 7 January 2016 18:44 (three years ago) link

you forgot he had 3010 hits?

skateboards are the new combover (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 7 January 2016 19:49 (three years ago) link

Yes.

Sofialo Ren (Leee), Thursday, 7 January 2016 19:55 (three years ago) link

200 hits a season for like a million seasons in a row

illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 7 January 2016 20:20 (three years ago) link

wade boggs was probably had the best first 10 years of any third baseman in history

k3vin k., Thursday, 7 January 2016 21:10 (three years ago) link

maybe schmitty or mathews gives him a run there but yeah, he's a deserving HOFer

k3vin k., Thursday, 7 January 2016 21:15 (three years ago) link

he's 28th all-time by fWAR, 4th among 3B

Karl Malone, Thursday, 7 January 2016 21:24 (three years ago) link

led the majors in BA and OBP for 5 of his first 7 years, including 4 straight, dude was a machine

k3vin k., Thursday, 7 January 2016 21:31 (three years ago) link

I had to remove this thread from my bookmarks because the title was getting the Cranberries stuck in my head ;_;

Very selfish, and very ironic (DJP), Tuesday, 12 January 2016 18:49 (three years ago) link

one month passes...

http://i.imgur.com/WgVCFpV.png

japanese mage (LocalGarda), Sunday, 14 February 2016 00:37 (three years ago) link

ONE OF US

Andy K, Sunday, 14 February 2016 00:53 (three years ago) link

i followed him based on this thread. i can't stop laughing but mainly everyone i know who likes sport finds this hilarious cos he was so famous that he was in a simpsons episode.

japanese mage (LocalGarda), Sunday, 14 February 2016 01:00 (three years ago) link

seven months pass...

‏@JoseCanseco Oct 1
Democracies are such a fragile thing and seem to age and deteriorate never being as good as they once were . Never reversing march to death

The Hon. J. Piedmont Mumblethunder (Dr Morbius), Monday, 3 October 2016 14:44 (two years ago) link

deep!

imho tep (sanskrit), Monday, 3 October 2016 17:16 (two years ago) link

one year passes...

In 2018 blockchain will become mainstream knowledge understood by moron level and above

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) November 22, 2017

Karl Malone, Wednesday, 22 November 2017 02:14 (one year ago) link

lol

crüt, Wednesday, 22 November 2017 02:21 (one year ago) link

when you were having premarital sex, jose cans

mookieproof, Wednesday, 22 November 2017 02:43 (one year ago) link

Canseco Rule- once tweeted or discussed in media by Jose Canseco then the concept has become 'mainstream knowledge'.

earlnash, Wednesday, 22 November 2017 10:07 (one year ago) link

I cannot believe David Ortiz aka Big Papi did not invite me to play in his golf tournament this weekend I'm one of the longest drivers in the world at 50 and over and one of the best golfers I could have helped him out with his charity does MLB still hold grudges against me

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) November 29, 2017

how will David Ortiz aka Big Papi respond

Karl Malone, Wednesday, 29 November 2017 22:15 (one year ago) link

solid take

What is going on with all these politicians molesting women I've been molested by several women and never complained

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) December 12, 2017

frogbs, Wednesday, 13 December 2017 13:58 (one year ago) link

nine months pass...

Hey little buddy @realDonaldTrump I am interested in United Nations leadership .dm me for ideas and confidential 90 day plan #readynow

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) October 9, 2018

a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 10 October 2018 18:16 (eleven months ago) link

three months pass...

Aliens have been trying to teach us how to time travel but first we have to change our body composition which we are not willing to do we have tried with animals and it has failed

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 30, 2019

omar little, Wednesday, 30 January 2019 17:43 (seven months ago) link

Cloning is illegal that's why we cannot evolve into our next stage

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

omar little, Thursday, 7 February 2019 20:29 (seven months ago) link

Once cloning is legal we will be able to purchase either bodies of ourselves in our Prime and once our shells get to old detach the brain and then apply to a new shell ot body..

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

omar little, Thursday, 7 February 2019 20:29 (seven months ago) link

In 50 years from now only the rich will be able to purchase a new body

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

omar little, Thursday, 7 February 2019 20:29 (seven months ago) link

New bodies will come with optional Android or robotic moving parts

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

omar little, Thursday, 7 February 2019 20:30 (seven months ago) link

I have figured out a way to live an extra 30 years

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

omar little, Thursday, 7 February 2019 20:30 (seven months ago) link

One of many ways to live an extra 30 years is that you have to sleep in almost freezing temperatures

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

omar little, Thursday, 7 February 2019 20:30 (seven months ago) link

Another way to live 30 years longer if you must have sex at least 3 times a week

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

omar little, Thursday, 7 February 2019 20:30 (seven months ago) link

people who have figured out have to live an extra 30 years

Karl Malone, Thursday, 7 February 2019 20:38 (seven months ago) link

he has the exact same energy as @Love_That_Goku

i have an encyclopedic knowledge of Dragonball canon and all you ask me is "does Krillin like anal" "does android 18 have a pussy" etc

— love_that_goku (@Love_that_Goku) September 24, 2016

all signs point to Android 18 having a functional reproductive system but once again this is not my business

— love_that_goku (@Love_that_Goku) September 24, 2016

NO Piccolo does not smoke weed

— love_that_goku (@Love_that_Goku) September 24, 2016

the way some of you people speak to me is disgusting. "hey Christian does piccolo smoke weed" "does Roshi fuck the turtle". just unreal

— love_that_goku (@Love_that_Goku) September 24, 2016

frogbs, Thursday, 7 February 2019 20:40 (seven months ago) link

everybody knows there are many ways to live 30 years longer, but here's a tricky constraint: I must have sex at least 3 times a week.

say it with sausages (Sufjan Grafton), Thursday, 7 February 2019 20:53 (seven months ago) link

one month passes...

Watching World of Dance watching J.Lo text Alex Rodriguez little does she know that he is cheating on her with my ex-wife Jessica poor girl she has no idea who he really is

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) March 11, 2019

Alex Rodriguez stop being a piece of shit stop cheating on Jennifer Lopez

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) March 11, 2019

frogbs, Monday, 11 March 2019 18:56 (six months ago) link

https://t.co/CXErAtc0aw...... you lied to defend that piece of shit Jessica I told you to not open up that can of worms time to polygraph and tell the truth now

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) March 13, 2019

omar little, Wednesday, 13 March 2019 18:43 (six months ago) link


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