Sources tell SI Alex Rodriguez tested positive for steroids in 2003

more like he's a dig dug fiend

I am still outraged that Wade Boggs' daily chicken-eating let him win those batting titles.

kobe "rape" bryant

btw, the FDA lets chickens take "boli"

Anyway the point stands: "Guitar Hero: A video game for monumental douchebags (unless you skate, in which case you're probably pretty normal)"

judging from the commercial its more guitar hero: gay douchebag foreplay

You should always sign your posts JESUS CHRIST.

That would be a mortal sin + 50-game suspension

why are we discussing that commercial when there is a MORE effective Heidi Klum version of the commercial to be viewed?

You guys (GUESTS!!) obviously didn't read my solution to all this on the other thread.

like it

"I told this to the players: we're sitting there watching Rodriguez yesterday ... and my son finally turned to me and he says, 'Daddy, this guy is stupid.' That probably says it all."
—Diamondbacks executive Ken Kendrick, on the Rodriguez press conference.

"I like the fact more when he says he was stupid, not young and naive."
—Yankees general manager Brian Cashman, speaking to the media after A-Rod.

"It was a bad decision that may cost him on so many levels."
—Cashman

"The one thing he could have said was the fact he chose to do this to make himself better ... at what he does on the baseball field. That's the truth."
—Cashman, on what A-Rod left out.

"I don't think Alex is very good at communicating ... whether it's about talking about your game and the impact you had on it after hitting a home run or if he had a tough game at the park, let the team down. Anybody that's been in that clubhouse when he's trying to talk about success or failure on the baseball diamond knows that is something he is not very good at."
—Cashman

"I do have to fight that darker instinct in me. We have a peaceful and more tranquil training camp these days."
—Red Sox president Larry Lucchino, on gloating about the Yankees' A-Rod problem.

"I try to focus on what we have going here, and not so much the problems that they have down there."
—Lucchino

"I think often of the old baseball cliché that the best deals are the deals you don't make. Not only would A-Rod be a member of the Red Sox presumably, and Manny Ramirez would have been gone, given the success he had in '04 and '07, Jon Lester would have been gone, given the success he's had and his future. Another cliché: it's better to be lucky than good."
—Lucchino (Dennis & Callahan, WEEI.com)

http://a.espncdn.com/photo/2009/0227/mlb_yuri_arod_576.jpg

boli makes you cross yr legs and pucker.

http://graysmatter.codivation.com/content/binary/zoolander_face.jpg

Alex, you don't know what you're doing to my lens. You have a natural rapport with the camera. It's unbelievable. Some performers can make love to the camera. Garbo did. Monroe did. So could you. Could you take your top off, please?

http://goofybeast.files.wordpress.com/2007/11/fight_club1.jpg

Yankees teammates, Roberts writes, nicknamed Rodriguez "B---h T--s" in 2005 because he put on 15 pounds in the offseason which included round pectorals, a condition called gynecomastia that can be caused by anabolic steroids.

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=4114292

lol high school

"A-Rod "pitch tipped" when he played for the Rangers by letting opponents at the plate know which pitch was coming in lopsided games. A-Rod expected players he helped would reciprocate when he was having an off night and needed to get his batting average up."

Hahaha wow what a hateful screed this woman wrote.

and he only tipped 15% at hooters

Hated at Hooters: B---h T--s' Pitch Tips, Stiff Tips, and Eventual Comeuppance by Selena Roberts

lol!

I'm not going to read it, but this bitchfest at A-Rod's expense sounds super amusing. From page 322:

"Rodriguez had soon become obsessed with his steroid shrunk member. Desperate to correct the problem, he began madly ordering ever penile enhancement product he could find. Credit card records show that Rodriguez spent nearly $1,500 every month from August 2004 to January 2006 to a company called Big Trucks Inc (which includes among it's many DBAs SIZE MATTERS, YOU CAN MAKE IT BIGGER and MASSIVE JOHNSON MAKE WIFE HAPPY IMPRESS FRIENDS.)"

ok, that's funny.

this certainly strikes mee as the kind of socially conscious journalism I expect from Selena Roberts.

I wish Jeter would get caught doing something crappy so we get "Derek Jeter: The Dark Side of an Icon".

Derek Jeter would never do anything crappy--he's a saint, and a great defensive player to boot

You messed that sentence up: he's a saint, and a great defensive player to boot.

a-rod shouldn't buy shit he hears about in spam e-mail offers

BITCH TITS
BITCH TITS
BITCH TITS
BITCH TITS
BITCH TITS

From page 275:

"When Rodriguez was told by a ballboy that other Yankees players referred to him as "b---h t--s" and "shrinkey d--k", Rodriguez apparently buried and his head in his hands and began to weep openly. But sadness turned quickly to rage and he began almost immediately throwing bats, gloves and helmets around the Yankees lockeroom screaming "it's that f-----r Jeter that's doing all this. F--k that f-----g guy. I'm gonna get him. Him and that sweaty freak Giambi are gonna pay.""

:O

wow

Okay now you guys write some.

lol

i dunno, don't think i can top that one

good work.

hey, maybe alex will read this thread and feel bad

page 279

"When Rodriguez finally confronted Jeter, according to an anonymous trainer in the locker room at the time, Derrick denied any involvement with the nicknames. Teammates immediately cleared the room when Jeter began consoling the teary-eyed Rodriguez and caressing his chest. `When I overheard Jeets assuring Alex that his size didn't matter is when I got the h--l out of there. I quit shortly thereafter.' said the trainer."

xp actually he has. From page 175:

"Rodriguez was particularly troubled by venom direct at him on baseball message boards. "What did I ever do to Alex in SF or NoTimeBeforeTime," he was overheard saying at a popular Manhattan strip club nursing an Amstel Light, "why do these guys hate me? Is it because I'm too good looking?""

I'm hoping Selena's book includes as many spelling and grammatical errors as my posts do.

wow, that's awesome ARod reads I Love Baseball. . . maybe we can get him to post

page 220:

"Unlike other celebrities, including Dr. Phil and Kanye West, Rodriguez refused to post on the world-famous ILX message boards. A clubhouse source says that Rodriguez told him, 'Fuck ILX. Fuck Dr. Morbius. Fuck Steve Shasta,' although the same source says he caught Rodriguez laughing at the Excelsior thread more than once."

page 221:

"Sources close to A-Rod claim the hall of fame bound slugger would spend hours pouring over the ILE tipping thread, trying to make sense of it."

From page 400 (last chapter!):

"After being hospitalized for nearly three weeks (note: to correct a fistula), Rodriguez emerged from the hospital a changed man. Sources close to him claim Rodrigruez had stopped drinking, cut down on womanizing (although a brief fling with Miley Cyrus was reported in the Daily News), and oftening spent only twenty minutes a day admiring himself in the mirror. "He's a different person now," a close friend said, "it's like he cares what I have to say about stuff. He's not looking past you to check out his reflection in car windows. He's still shooting drugs into his groin though. Definitely still doing that."

http://patheticgeekstories.com/archives/archiveimages/derisionC.gif

"Rodriguez was particularly troubled by venom direct at him on baseball message boards. "What did I ever do to Alex in SF or NoTimeBeforeTime," he was overheard saying at a popular Manhattan strip club nursing an Amstel Light, "why do these guys hate me? Is it because I'm too good looking?""

haha, very Reggie Jackson-esque

On accusations of A-Rod using roids in high school:

“There’s no way,” Dodgers utilityman Doug Mientkiewiczsaid. “I was with him too much, I was with him for too long. Our team was together, like, 20 hours of the day. Every day. Even Sundays. And holidays. I spent like all of Christmas day with Alex one time. We went to the movies that day. Saw Forrest Gump. Didn't like it. Plus we took showers together. We slept in hammocks together. I saw every inch of Alex's body back then and I am a pretty observant guy. I think I would have noticed needle marks on his firm buttocks or rock hard biceps. Or testicular shrinkage. Naw he was clean back then. I'm sure of it. Positive.”

loool at these fanfics

so looking forward to "bitch tits" chants at Fenway during nationally televised broadcasts, this is going to rule

wtffffff